Heart to Hart
by EroSenin'sDeciplesKJT
Summary: SEQUEL to 'THE DEAL' Chris Jericho gets the interview of his life when he manages to get Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels in the same room together. But this interview reveals more than just the story you know. Or the story you THOUGHT you knew. SLASH
1. Intro and Summary

**_DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own the WWE. It is owned by Vincent Kennedy McMahon and the rest of the McMahon family. I own none of the guys mentioned in this fic. This fic is entirely FICTIONAL even though some of the things I use could possibly be based off several interviews/books I've seen/read. IF some of this stuff happened in the past, I know nothing about it and it's completely coincidental. -fangirl laugh- And last but not least, no money is being made off of this and never will. _**

Hello readers. I just thought I'd give you a brief introduction and summary about this fic. You see, I've always been fascinated with the feud between Bret and Shawn. There are so many sides to the story that it's ridiculous now. The only sides of the story that should really matter to people are Bret's, Shawn's, Vince's, and Earl Hebner's. All the others who have put in their two and three cents over the years have only helped blow the issue out of proportion more than necessary.

I've watched countless interviews about the 'Montreal Screwjob' and the only thing I've ever gotten out of any of them is this: Shawn knew. Bret knew he knew. Earl wanted no part of it. And Vince wanted the blame. That's pretty much the gist of it all. Whenever people try to take it farther and explore the issue to its very root, we can never seem to quite get there. These days, Shawn has been quoted saying that he'd be glad to sit down and do interviews with Bret but of course, Bret wants no part of it. He doesn't want to see Shawn's face and I suppose he has the right to feel this way.

I have my own opinion about the matter and I'm sure you all do as well. However, I'm not writing this story to start the whole 'Shawn Screwed Bret' or 'Bret Screwed Bret' ordeal. This is just my take on several interviews that I've seen but with a twist. I decided to make a completely FICTIONAL plot to go along with the interviews because I can do that. The story isn't anything special. The setting is just a small room at the WWE headquarters just ripe for a personal interview. This small room is going to be key because there's nowhere to go. No where to hide. So brace yourself for my take on Bret and Shawn's 'friendship'. It's not great but after watching previews of Frost/Nixon, I couldn't help myself. Yes, it is slash and yes, there will probably be flashbacks of a sexual nature that takes place between two males so if you can't deal with that then turn away now otherwise, enjoy.

**~*~*~**

**Summary:** _It's approaching the 12th Anniversary of the Montreal Screwjob and Chris Jericho has a special Highlight Reel Special planned for the WWE Universe. He convinces the two participants of the match to do a one on one interview with him and all hell breaks loose. Throughout the interview some secrets are revealed that tell a whole other story besides the one you're used to hearing. Lies. Trust. Friendship. Sex. Drinking. Gambling. Nothing is off limits in this tell all interview._

**~*~*~**

**Starring: **_Bret Hart, Shawn Michaels, Chris Jericho, Marty Jannetty, The McMahons, Paul Levesque, 'The Kliq', John Cena, Adam Copeland, Randy Orton, Mark Calloway, Dave Bautista and may be appearances by others._

**WARNING: There may be some disturbing scenes in the future. How disturbing? Well I don't know. It just depends on how the muse runs. At any rate, I can promise you that there will be some rape, violence, lots of foul language, drinking, drugs and possibly BDSM like behavior later on. Making no promises but just in case the muse turns dark, you have been forewarned. **


	2. Session 1 The Reunion

Shawn Michaels entered the small room and took a seat. There was a huge, thick divider to the right of him that prevented him from seeing Bret's face. Shawn scoffed. Not that he cared about seeing Bret anymore, but he thought it was a little ridiculous for Bret to act like this. The lights started flashing and a camera was now right in his face. "Alright Shawn. It's almost time to start. We're about to bring Bret out now."

"Alright. Thanks Chris." Chris smiled at his long time idol before taking a seat out front. It was hard trying to get the two men to sit down but Chris just had to do this interview. For starters, both Shawn and Bret had done several interviews but not one of them to date revealed the whole truth. It was the same as always – Bret's side and Shawn's defense. But Chris Irvin had an idea. He went to Vince McMahon begging him to let him do a special Highlight Reel. After all, it was now approaching the 12th anniversary of Montreal and what better way to celebrate its infamous moment in wrestling history than to talk with the participants of the match. Vince listened to Chris' argument with an open mind. In the end, Vince said he could do it but only on certain conditions.

First of all, the interview had to be taped at the WWE Headquarters in Stamford. That way, the two men didn't have to worry about the fans chanting things (especially Shawn) and the environment would be completely nonbiased. Secondly, it was up to Chris to get in contact with Bret. Vince never begged anyone for a thing in his life and he certainly wasn't about to start with Bret. Chris wasted no time calling up a few favors from friends in Canada. Three days later he was on the phone with Bret making the arrangements. It took some begging and some intense negotiating but in the end, Montreal's own agreed to do the interview. He asked that he and Shawn be separated hence the divider. He also asked that only Chris, Shawn, and the camera guy be in the room. Otherwise he wouldn't do it. Chris was only too happy to agree to this even though he was sure he'd hate the intense tension. _Oh well…Just a small price to pay for such a great interview._ Chris looked up from his chair to see Bret entering the room. He took his seat in the chair next to the divider. He was wearing some nice jeans and a black tee as well as his favorite shades. Shawn was also dressed comfortably on the other side wearing only some jeans and a white tank.

"So when do we start?" Bret asked. "I'm ready to get this show on the road if ya know what I mean." Chris was a little taken back but shrugged it off. Bret was also a hero of his so he had to be careful not to offend either man. Chris signaled for the camera guy to get ready and then he took his seat.

"Alright ladies, gentleman and all of you people in the WWE Universe. Welcome to this very special edition of the Highlight Reel. As you know, this year will mark the 12th Anniversary of what has been deemed the 'Montreal Screwjob' and what better way to celebrate it than to speak with the persons involved. I spoke with Vince who has decided to let you two gentlemen have this one. Now then, I guess I should start with Shawn."

"Please by all means start with motor-mouth over there," Bret mumbled. Shawn bit his lip to suppress a chuckle.

"I'm choosing to ignore that and Chris, go ahead. I'll answer anything you ask."

"Uh…ahem. Alright then. So my first question. Shawn, did you know about it?"

"Of course he knew!" Bret snapped. Shawn rolled his eyes.

"I believe he was asking me and yes Chris I knew. I knew about _everything_," he sang. Bret gripped the side of his chair tighter to relieve some of his anger.

"I always knew you were a pathological liar." Shawn turned to face him forgetting momentarily that there was a divider in place. He took a deep breath suppressing his anger. He was not going to let Bret get to him. Not today. Today was about getting his side of the story out not indulging Bret's over sensitive ego.

"So by knew, you mean you knew what you were supposed to do?"

"That's right Chris. I knew about the plan from start to finish."

"Alright Shawn. Well I guess the next question will have to be who came up with it?"

"Well there was no one person who came up with it. Hunter and I stormed Vince's office one day demanding to know what Bret was planning to do. The pay per view was fast approaching and I still had no idea if I was going to be put over or not. If Canada's _hero _here was taking his sweet little time letting everyone know about his—

"Oh that's bullshit and you know it," Bret snapped. "By then, everyone including you and your temporary boyfriend knew about my leaving." Bret resisted the urge to bang his fist on the wall between them but it was hard – real hard.

"For your information _Bret_, we knew that you asked to get out of your contract but none of us knew what Vince was going to do. Yeah people were talking in the locker rooms but you of all people should _know _where listening to backstage gossip will get you."

"Backstage gossip can save you a lot of heartache in the long run. I often wish I'd have listened to some of the guys." Shawn opened his mouth to say something but Chris cut him off.

"Okay, okay. Back to the matter at hand." Chris cleared his throat and loosened his tie a bit. The temperature in the room seemed to have risen a considerable amount of degrees even though they'd only been inside for ten minutes. _Maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all…_ Chris sighed. "Alright Bret. Here's one for you. In response to Shawn's answer of not knowing about your plans, what do you have to say to that?" Bret shook his head.

"I'd have to say Shawn's a liar. Always have been and always will be. He knew that I was planning to leave the company because I told him before I told anyone else."

"Like hell I knew!" Shawn turned to the semi-see through wall, his face contorted with rage and disbelief. "You're so quick to call me a liar Bret but what about all the lies you told? Huh? What about the lies you're telling Chris now?" he challenged. Chris raised his hands.

"Now, now wait a second Shawn. Just calm—

"I won't calm down Chris," he growled. "We both said we would tell the truth and by God the truth will come out today. Tell him Bret. Tell him how everyone and their mama knew you were leaving except me." Bret's lips curled into a teasing smile. _He's angry… I love it!_

"Well if that's the case then you just lied yourself." Shawn scoffed.

"I should have known. Chris this is pointless. All he's doing is turning all his lies back on me. We're about to start another circle – a cycle of never ending lies – and in the end you'll know no more about the mess than you knew coming into this. We can't resolve this issue Chris unless some people learn to grow up."

"Oh like you?" Bret asked grinning on the other side. Shawn cursed under his breath.

"I can't do this Chris. I'm sorry. I…I gotta get out of this room." Shawn stood to leave and darted for the door.

"Just like you to run away when you feel you can't handle things on your own. And you said _I'm_ the one who needs to grow up?" Bret scoffed. "You're the same, scared little boy I knew once upon a time. You haven't changed a bit…_Scar_lett." Shawn's hand froze on the door handle sending the temperature rising another ten degrees. Chris readied himself just in case Shawn decided to go around the divider after Bret but he did not. Instead, Shawn quietly walked back to his chair taking a seat again. Chris looked back and forth between the two men. Shawn looked absolutely livid while Bret was clearly amused. _How quickly the momentum shifts between the two of them. I am in for one hell of an interview._ Not knowing what else to say right now, Chris decided to give the two some time to cool off.

"Uh…we'll take a short break and then continue in five. I'm going to get some drinks." Chris quickly left the room leaving the two rivals alone. As soon as Chris left Bret laughed.

"Still doesn't take much to get you riled up. You're as feisty as ever." Shawn rolled his eyes.

"Some people just have a way of getting under my skin."

"Means I haven't lost my touch." Shawn smirked.

"Neither have I Bret." _Neither have I._

"Alright guys. Are we ready to answer more questions?" Chris tossed both men a bottle of water before taking his seat again. This time, he left his jacket elsewhere deciding that conducting this interview in full suit was just pointless. Though the two guys seemed alright for now, Chris was sure it was bound to get ugly again sooner or later.

"I'm ready," Bret answered. "Don't know about Scarlett over there though."

"_Shawn_ is ready," he answered. "And don't call me Scarlett." Bret smirked.

"Whatever you say dear." Chris cleared his throat.

"Okay then. I guess…we'll pick up where we left off. Er…Shawn, if Bret didn't tell you he was leaving himself, can you remind him and the rest of the Universe how you found out this news?" Shawn remained deathly silent for several seconds staring at his bottle of water. _Just what have I gotten myself into? Bret…_ Shawn closed his eyes trying to figure out the best way to answer the question truthfully.

"Oh damn I'll answer," Bret grumbled. "Shawn probably found out from some really good friends of mine. You know, some of that backstage gossip that people should learn to ignore." Shawn looked over towards Bret frowning. _I guess he __**does**__ want to avoid going there…_

"Shawn the way Bret answered just now implies that you had a habit of listening to backstage rumors or gossip." Shawn grinned.

"Well, sometimes it's hard to ignore the gossip, especially when it involves your own good name."

"You should have been used to it by then Scarlett," he grinned. "Seems like your 'good' name was _always_ part of the backstage gossip."

"It's not like you didn't know," Shawn retorted. "Didn't stop you from pursuing what you wanted." And just that quickly Bret's smug grin was wiped off his face. He stared towards the divider with a cold look on his face.

"Uh…yeah. So Shawn, tell me what the guys were saying? If you can name specific people—

"His lying ass boyfriend told him I was leaving," Bret snapped. Shawn's jaw just dropped.

"_Boyfriend?_ My lying…" Shawn scoffed. "Bret please. Please don't do this. You're opening a door that needs to stay closed but if you think for one second that I'm just going to sit here and let you bury me with your side of the story then you are dead wrong." Shawn lowered his voice sending chills down Bret and Chris' spines. "If you go there then _I'll_ go there – and full force too. I will defend myself by any means necessary because you are on _my_ terf now Bret. No more interviews with Bret loving whores from Canada. Just you, me, and the camera." Shawn giggled. "Try me. Just try me and I swear to God I'll tell it all." Bret quickly stood to his feet irritated by Shawn's ultimatum._ Just who does he think he is? _He slammed his hands against the divider making Shawn jump.

"Then it's on," he growled. "I don't care what you tell. Go there if you want. That's what you want to do anyway." Shawn jumped to his feet pressing his nose to the divider. Both men could just barely make out their counterparts due to the way the glass was made but that didn't matter.

"I don't want to go there Bret. The only reason I agreed to do the interview was because I wanted to prove to you that I wasn't afraid to apologize in person. I was going to answer all of Chris' questions straight forward but you…you had to pick a fight with me and here we are; separated by a stupid wall because _you're_ too afraid to face me."

"I'm not _afraid _to face anyone. I just don't want to see _you_." Shawn lowered his voice to barely a whisper.

"The reason you don't want to see my face isn't because you hate me. It's because you're afraid to see my face when I apologize to you." Bret's body began shaking with fury but Shawn continued on. To Chris, it looked as though Shawn had no idea what he was doing to Bret but Chris was wrong. Shawn knew exactly what he was doing because he knew Bret. He knew Bret all too well and was going to push him over the edge by the end of this interview. Shawn smiled. "You're afraid Bret that if you look at me, you'll have to accept my sincere apology and thus prove to the world that you're not a complete jerkoff like everyone says you are."

"I think you're wrong."

"_Oh?_ Well let me try again. Oh right let's see…Ahh I know. I wonder what happens to someone like yourself who never got over—

"Shut up!" Bret yelled. "How dare you even…? I can't believe you just…"

"Looks like you're not the only one who can get under someone's skin." Shawn took his seat again and went to drinking on his water leaving Bret standing in fit of fury. _I hate him! I hate Shawn so much! The audacity! For him to even think that I… _Bret leaned against the glass. _I should have the divider removed so I can see his face. No…no I can't. It hurts too much looking at him on TV. I can only imagine what it'll be like looking in his face._ Bret let out a deep breath before taking his seat again. By now, Chris was starting to get jumpy. Ask the wrong question and God knows what'll happen.

"Alright guys please. Can we…continue now?" Since no one answered Chris decided to change the direction a bit. A fresh question. "Okay. How about we try something else? Bret, what exactly made you want to leave the WWE for the rival company?"

"I believe Shawn can answer that."

"He was motivated to leave because he couldn't handle the competition here," Shawn answered dryly. "I was a bit too much for him so—

"Yeah you're right. Vince would do _anything_ for his precious Scarlett. I was just in the way."

"Whatever Bret," Shawn mumbled. "I was being sarcastic. The hell if I know why he wanted to leave. Bret never struck me as the money hungry type so I dunno. Maybe I was wrong about him. I've been wrong about a lot of people in my time. Who's to say Bret was any different?"

"Same could be said about you. I thought I knew you Shawn and then you—

"I did nothing and you know it! You left _ME_! Not the other way around." Bret stood to his feet again pressing his face to the wall that divided them.

"THAT'S BECAUSE YOU LEFT ME NO CHOICE! I WASN'T GOING TO HANG AROUND AND BE HUMILIATED ANY LONGER! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW IT FELT TO HAVE THE ENTIRE LOCKER ROOM WHISPERING BEHIND MY BACK?!"

"OF COURSE I KNEW!" Shawn screamed.

"Then you should be able to understand why I did it then."

"I've always been talked about Bret. I've been talked about all my life but I didn't let that stop me from doing what I love or leaving the people I cared about most." There was another wave of awkward silence filling the small room. Chris didn't know if should leave them or try and proceed. It looks like there's a lot more to Montreal than meets the eye but there's no way we'll get anywhere else today. Chris cleared his throat.

"Uh…Shawn…Bret, how about we pick this up tomorrow sometime?"

"NO!" they both shouted. Chris practically jumped out of his chair.

"Okay, okay. Sorry. I'll…We'll continue in a moment when you two are ready."

"WE'RE READY!" they shouted. Both men stormed back to their seats seething with anger. Chris cleared his throat. _Now for round two…I guess…_


	3. Session 2 First Impressions

AN: From here on out, expect this to jump around a bit. It will bounce back and forth between the present interview and past happenings told from both Bret and Shawn's POV. I don't plan to make the story too long but then again, I didn't expect so many people to read the first chapter. So it continues…Why do our boys despise each other so much? That is still yet to be seen…

* * *

_Man…These two really hate each other. I knew it was bad but I thought that with Shawn's faith and all he would be able to keep things straight. Goes to show what assuming will do for ya._ Chris sighed. He looked back and forth between the two men trying to figure out who would be best to question next but they both looked equally disturbed. Shawn was staring down at his bottle of water with a face that Chris almost swore was filled with sadness. Bret on the other hand had a face void of anything – not even anger. _Hmm…maybe we can discuss their relationship. That seems like a good place to start._ Chris sat up nervously in his chair clearing his throat.

"Gentlemen let's proceed again. Now Shawn…Bret, it's no secret that you two grew up to be some of the biggest rivals in WWE history but sometimes there's a lot more to rivalries than meets the eye." Both Bret and Shawn shifted nervously in their seats, neither one meeting Chris' eye. Chris continued. "I'll use myself as an example. Shawn, you and I are great rivals onscreen but I'm not afraid to admit to the Universe that you're one of my very best friends." Bret scoffed mumbling something incoherent but Chris ignored him. "My point is gentlemen that not all rivals hate each other in real life. Now I'm sure you guys probably hate each other now but before Montreal – way before that incident – were you ever friends?"

"Define friends," Shawn replied.

"What do ya mean?" Chris asked. Shawn shrugged.

"Well…depending on your definition of 'friends' will determine whether or not I can answer you truthfully."

"Oh cut the crap blondie!" Bret snapped irritably. "We were friends. There are too many witnesses to say otherwise."

"Fine," Shawn answered dryly. "We might have been friends at some point but—

"Oh we were a lot more than friends," Bret smirked. Shawn glared towards the divider.

"Thought you didn't want to go there?"

"Oh I'm sorry," he sang. "I thought this was a tell all interview."

"Oh well then," he laughed. "If that's the case…" Shawn looked up at Chris and smiled. "Bret and I were the _best _of friends once. In fact…" Shawn looked over at the divider batting his eyelashes playfully, "he was one of my first wrestling friends second only to Marty…"

**~*~*~**

"Shawn…Shawn I don't know if I can do this." Shawn turned to his partner Marty and kissed his forehead.

"It's going to be alright."

"But Shawn, remember when we came to the interview the other day? The guys practically acted as if we didn't exist."

"Yeah they did but who cares? Marty, you and I are _The Midnight Rockers_. No one noticed us when we first started wrestling. We **made **them notice. You and I…we do things in the ring that other tag teams only wish they could do." Marty looked up at his friend and smiled.

"I guess you're right."

"Now come on. We need to go change quickly before we miss our first match." Shawn grabbed his friend's hand leading them inside the arena. The place was buzzing with talk and filled with life as the stage hands scurried about in a frenzy getting things ready for the night's show. Shawn and Marty spotted a few guys in tights and followed them up the hall until found the locker rooms. Shawn took a deep breath then headed inside. Guys were scattered about in their groups laughing or going over moves. No one seemed to notice the two new comers, which was just fine with Shawn. He led Marty to an area near the far back of the room and both men started changing into their gear. When Shawn finally got his tights on, he started to feel as though he were being watched. He glanced over at Marty who was pretending to busy himself with the belt around his waist. Shawn shook his head. Marty was a great guy and an even better wrestler than him sometimes. He just wished that Marty showed a little more confidence in himself but until then, it was up to Shawn to encourage him. He needed Marty and Marty needed him so it the perfect friendship for now. Shawn smacked his friend across the jaw playfully.

"Hey! What gives? That hurt!" Shawn laughed.

"I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself! You were staring so intently at your belt that I was almost certain you were on another planet."

"No, I'm good. It's just…weird." Marty lowered his voice so that only Shawn could hear him. "We're being watched…well, mostly you and I don't like it."

"Oh Marty," Shawn laughed. "You know I don't care—

"Yeah but…but one of the guys is Bret."

"Hart?"

"Yes!" he hissed. "He's been staring at us…well _you_ since we got in here."

**~*~*~**

"I was NOT staring," Bret huffed. He sat up in his chair feeling slightly indignant. Chris looked to Shawn for a little help but Shawn was a bit beside himself. His hand was covering his mouth to keep from laughing out loud. After a minute or two, Shawn finally spoke up again.

"I'm sorry Chris. I got a little tickled. I haven't had to recall such memories in so long that—

"I don't care because you know full well that I wasn't staring at you," Bret grumbled.

"Oh? So you're calling Marty a liar?"

"No but—

"That's what I thought. Anyway Chris, maybe he wasn't staring but he did _in fact_ notice me."

"How could anyone not? With that long, thick, bleach blonde hair of yours and those yellow tights, you were kind of hard to miss," he chuckled. Chris stared at the two of them in disbelief. The mood seemed a bit…lighter now which made Chris' head hurt. _Just what the hell is up with these two?_

"Uh…so did you guys speak? What happened next?" Chris asked.

"Marty and I left the locker room for our first match. We ignored the celebrity and went on our merry way."

"What happened after the match?" Shawn frowned.

"A lot." Shawn took a swig of his water then sighed. "A lot of people don't know this but Marty and I had a hard time winning over the other guys. I mean, sure we kicked ass in the ring every night but that wasn't enough for some of them." Chris waited for Shawn and Bret to start fussing again but to his surprised, both men remained quiet. Chris cut his eyes towards Bret and noticed that he looked almost sad, but Chris couldn't be sure.

"I take it the rest of the night was kind of bad."

"Yeah. I uh…after our match Vince called me into his office. Marty went back to the locker rooms to shower and change. Vince uh…told me that he was pleased with our first match and he hoped that we would continue to wow him every night. It was…It was a good feeling considering Marty and I were kind of off in the ring."

"You were fine." Shawn and Chris both looked towards Bret clearly surprised.

"They…they were fine?" Chris asked. It had been a while since Bret said anything so Chris was not going to miss this chance at getting his point of view. Bret raised his shades so that they rested on top of his forehead. He tapped his finger against the side of his water bottle. Never taking his eyes off it, he spoke again softly.

"Yeah. They were great. I was impressed."

***~*~***

Bret sat in his corner backstage talking with his brother Owen and his cousin David. They were all family and thus hung out together all the time. Some of the other wrestlers hated it but they didn't care. All the guys had their little groups the only difference was that Bret's group members were all family. Bret finished lacing up his boots then proceeded to run a comb through his gorgeous wavy black hair. His brother Owen was going over some match endings with David. They were laughing and goofing off but after a while they got eerily silent. Bret suddenly looked up.

"Alright guys. Why are you so quiet all of a sudden? Are you keeping something from me again?"

"No, no, no," Owen hissed. "It's just…well see for yourself." They moved to the side so Bret could get a look at the new comers. Both had blonde hair though the shorter of the two had bleach blonde hair – it was nicer looking too. The two guys were changing quietly in the far corner ignoring all of the stares that were being cast their way. Bret shrugged.

"So we got a couple of new comers. No big deal. They don't look like much of a threat to any of you so leave 'em alone."

"Yes but…" Owen grinned. "They look so…scared. They won't last two weeks if they don't buck up." Bret looked over their way again. This time he met Marty's eye but the kid dropped his head pretending not to notice. Bret shrugged.

"Yeah. They look a little nervous but that's to be expected. Maybe after tonight they'll get used to it."

"I guess but if they continue to dress like _that_ then people will start to think _other_ things about them," David grinned. The guys tried not to stare as Marty and Shawn walked by them leaving the locker room. Once they were gone, Owen's face lit up.

"Hey! How about we go check 'em out? You know, see what they're bringing to the table."

"Oh please," David replied. "No one on this roster is anywhere near good enough to give the Hart Foundation a run so—

"Aww come on cuz! Look, just…aren't you the least bit curious as to why Vince hired them?" David and Bret cast each other wary looks.

"Alright. Fine. We'll go watch but don't make rude comments to them if they suck," Bret warned. "I don't want Vince getting onto us for being rude. We're supposed to set an example…most of the time," he laughed.

"Yeah, yeah now let's go!"

The guys left the locker room and stood backstage watching the match. For some reason Bret just couldn't take his eyes off of Shawn. The way he moved in the ring was unlike anything he'd ever seen before. _For just a bunch of kids, they really can hold their own. _Owen and David made comments throughout the match but Bret just watched, taking in their moves like a book. They were quick – very quick – and had a knack for reading each other's moves. They moved together as one and it looked so good. It was like they'd been wrestling together all their life. They were just that good. The crowd seemed to be impressed with them too and by the end of the match, they'd manage to win over a lot of skeptics including his brother Owen.

"Dude, they were really good," Owen said. "What did you think Bret?"

"I agree. They were good." _Really good… _"Alright fellas. Let's go."

Bret, David, and Owen went back to the locker rooms to await their match. Not too long afterwards, Marty walked in but he was alone. Bret frowned. He had thought about introducing himself to them but he didn't want to speak to just one of them. Plus, he was really only interested in speaking with the other partner, Shawn, who seemed to be more confident in the ring than Marty. Bret waited around for Shawn to show but when he didn't he had to leave. It was time for his main event match he didn't want to be late.

***~*~***

Silence. Dead silence and then Shawn finally spoke up.

"I didn't…know you waited up for us." Bret let out a sigh and then a small chuckle.

"I did. Like I said, you guys impressed me. I'd never seen anybody fly around the ring like you two did. It was…unbelievable." Bret couldn't believe he was saying these things but anything else would be a lie. That night was ingrained into his memory because he really had been impressed. At first glance, Shawn and Marty looked like two girls way out of their league but in the ring it was like their entire personas changed. _They may have looked funny but their moves made up for it._

"Wow. That's…I'm really surprised right now," Chris replied. "You're actually…complimenting Shawn."

"I can't believe it either."

"Well…no, I think this is great!" Chris exclaimed. "So…so this just proves that you didn't hate each other at first glance." Both men shook their heads. "Alright. So everything I've heard up until this point has been nothing but good things. How did it turn out to be such a bad night?" Bret decided to let Shawn take it from here. After a minute of silence, Shawn finally spoke up again.

"Marty…"

**~*~*~**

Shawn hurried out of Vince's office with a smile on his face. Vince loved them and he couldn't wait to tell Marty! Shawn quickly entered the locker room. By now, most of the other guys had already gone so the locker room was pretty empty. Shawn headed towards the back and saw that Marty's things were still there. He grinned.

"HEY MARTY!" Shawn called out to him but he got no answer. Shawn walked over to the shower area where water was still running. _Ahh he must be in here._ Shawn stripped out of his gear then started for the showers. He quickly spotted Marty who was all alone standing underneath the sprinkler, looking down at his feet like something was wrong. "Marty?" His partner pretended to ignore him which made Shawn wonder. He approached his good friend determined to get to the bottom of it. "Marty look at me." When he still wouldn't listen, Shawn grabbed his shoulders spinning him around.

"Shawn no—

"Oh God…" Marty's jaw was swollen big time and his face was red as a cherry. "What happened?"

"It's nothing," he grumbled. Marty turned away but Shawn wasn't about to let it go. He grabbed Marty's shoulders forcing him back against the wall.

"No! I wanna know what happened to my friend."

"Shawn let go of me!"

"I won't! We're partners and friends. If you can't talk to me about it then who can you talk to?" Marty shoved Shawn away and started sobbing.

"God Shawn…you can't keep fighting all my battles for me."

"Marty, who did this?"

"I…I don't know and even if I did I wouldn't tell you," he choked. "It doesn't matter Shawn. One of these days you won't be around to fight my battles for me. I…I need to learn to stand on my own."

"Yes but for now you have me. You'll always have me." Shawn pulled his friend into his arms and just held him close.

"Bret," he whispered. "He stopped them from hurting me."

"Bret?" _Maybe he isn't the douche I heard he could be after all…_

"Yeah and I'm sorry Shawn. I really am." Shawn pulled away a little frowning.

"What for?"

"For being so…timid and weak."

"You're neither of those things Marty. If you were then you wouldn't be wrestling."

"I…maybe." Shawn watched the water fall over Marty's face as he tried to think of something else to say, but he couldn't. Instead he let his heart speak for him.

"Marty?" His friend looked up at him, his face filled with an innocence Shawn was yet to get used to. He slid a hand along side of Marty's face entangling his fingers in the soft, wet strands. Marty closed his eyes and Shawn captured his lips, pulling him forward into a quick, passionate kiss.

"What was that for?" Marty asked a second later.

"Uh…I…don't know." _I have no idea…_ Both men went back to their shower areas where they showered in complete silence, both with a lot on their mind.

**~*~*~**

"I always knew you were queer," Bret snided.

"Screw you Bret!" Shawn snapped. "You don't know _anything_ about Marty and me so just keep your damn mouth shut!"

"I don't need to know anything. You just told me everything I needed to know."

"I was not gay Bret!" Shawn growled. "Marty and I were just really good friends and when you work with someone for so long and live together, you're bound to grow feelings for one another."

"And in your case, Marty was a guy which makes you queer."

"And what does that make you Bret?" Shawn challenged.

"I'm not gay," he answered coolly.

"You slept with me."

"WHAT DID YOU SAY!?"

"You heard me," Shawn smirked. "You slept with me – and several times I might add." Bret jumped to his feet and started pushing at the divider.

"YOU COME OVER HERE AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE! I DID NOT SLEEP WITH YOU!"

"Oh, well then I guess the technical term would be 'fuck'," he snapped back.

"SON OF A BITCH!" Bret punched the divider, his body filled with rage but Shawn just sat there laughing to himself.

"You're still the same homophobic maniac that I knew way back when. You…you haven't changed a bit and it's sad."

"What's sad is all your lies—

"THEY'RE NOT LIES BRET!" Shawn jumped to his feet pressing his face to the divider. "I cannot lie anymore because my faith doesn't allow it. _You_ on the other hand need to get a grip. You slept with me _willingly_ several times and if that doesn't make you gay then you really are delusional."

"I'm…I'm not gay. I have a wife—

"Whoa ho! Wow. Whoop-dee-do! You have a wife!" Shawn exclaimed. "Well I tell you what. Keep on hiding behind your _precious_ wife and kids but it still doesn't make you any less than what you already are."

"Shut UP!" he yelled. Shawn punched the wall.

"No, YOU shut up! God! I'm so sick and tired of you! You're killing me! But you know what? I don't care because I'm not holding anything back Bret. I've done it for so long – kept everything about my past hidden for 12 long years and I'm sick of it! If you can't handle the truth then go. Get the hell out of here but whether you admit your side of truth or not, I'm not holding back. You did sleep with me Bret and I _willingly_ let you. _That_ my friend is the truth." Both men stared at the wall that was dividing them seething with anger while Chris looked on cautiously. Bret banged his head against the wall.

"I hate you," he whispered. "I really do."

"Yeah well the feeling's mutual."

"I won't let you ruin me."

"And I'm done covering for you."

"I never fucked you Shawn."

"And what would you call it Bret? I didn't fuck myself." There was a long pause before Bret spoke up again.

"I don't know what I did. I just know I didn't fuck you."

"Oh come on! You know what? Screw it. Chris I'm out of here. I can't take anymore of his crap for the day. He knows he slept with me and I'd swear it on a bible if I have to." Shawn stormed across the room biting his lip. He felt like bursting into tears because it hurt so much. The truth. All he wanted was for Bret to admit what he did but because he won't, he was making Shawn out to look like a liar and Shawn hated it. Ever since Montreal people were wary to believe anything he said and it didn't help that Bret wasn't talking. _If Bret would only admit his side of Montreal… I didn't even want to talk about Marty or our past together but he backed me into a corner… I hate him!_ Shawn turned the knob and opened the door.

"Shawn wait! I…I didn't fuck you but…" Bret sighed. _I hate him so much but I can't go back on my word… It's now or never I guess… _

"Good bye Bret."

"No Shawn I…I didn't…fuck you because I made love to you."


	4. Session 3 All About Marty

AN: The story is going to be slightly AU in terms of dates. While I do own the Heartbreak and Triumph book and DVDs, I didn't feel like getting too specific with dates and I was too tired to go look stuff up again. So…the time frame for certain events that may occur in the future will be slightly off. Also, some of the wrestlers I may mention in the future may or may not have been with Vince at the time of said events. Some may even be WCW owned so just giving you the heads up. Oh and some of them may have some modifications done to their names. (I don't want to get sued) I did watch both shows at one time but my main focus has always been WWF/WWE so…yeah. 

* * *

It was too late to take it back because he'd already said it. As Bret stood with his face to the wall that separated him from his rival, he closed his eyes to fight back the tears. He hated Shawn. He hated him so much because only Shawn could get under his skin like this. His wife, not even his brother Owen could irk him the way Shawn could in the past…or today too. _Why did I come here? Why did I agree to this pointless interview?_ Bret bit his lip still fighting to keep from tearing up. For years people have been trying to get him to do interviews with Shawn but every time they asked, he would decline. Part of the reason he chose not to do the interviews was because he hated Shawn but not really. On the surface he really hated Shawn and in his mind, he hated him too but just because your mind hates something doesn't mean the heart will.

Bret groaned. _Why? Why didn't I just stay home? Why didn't I just say no?_ Because truthfully, a part of him has always wondered what it would be like to talk with his ex lover after all these years. Secretly, he'd always dreamed of seeing him in person one last time but to do that would mean sacrificing so much. His dignity. His pride. Everything the Hart name stood for and yet he was here. He was finally here doing something he secretly longed to do but at a great price. _So much has already been revealed today and the more I try to fight it, the more I end up revealing._ _What is wrong with me? Why can't I get it together? Why am I breaking like this? _In a way, Bret felt kind of relieved to get some of this off of his chest. So long had he carried the secret of his affair with Shawn. No one knew. No one. Not even Owen though he was sure Owen suspected it at one time. But now it was out in the open and if Chris Irvin chose to air all of this on his special then soon the whole world would know. _My name will be ruined. My wife will leave me. My family will hate me. I'm so stupid._

"God I'm stupid," he whispered. He waited and waited but the room remained quiet, no one daring to utter a word. Chris looked over at Shawn who was still standing at the door clenching the knob. _The smart thing to do would be to call this whole thing off right now but I can't help but wonder if this is exactly what the two of them need. I want the scoop but at the same time, Chris Jericho will become even more famous if he could reunite these two before the world. Yes! I…I have an idea…_ Chris spoke softly.

"Say Bret, are you in the mood for more questions or would you feel better if we stopped the interview?" There was a long pause before Bret spoke up.

"I'll…stay if he stays."

"Alright. Shawn? Can you stay a while longer?" Chris asked. Shawn didn't answer. He just slowly turned around and made his way back to his chair. He stared down at the floor lost in an array of thought. Chris nodded towards Bret who finally took his seat as well. "Okay. So up until now, we've established that Shawn knew what was going to go down in Montreal. We've also established that the two of you weren't always at each other's throats. And…we've also learned that the two of you were closer than close at some point so now tell me, what exactly went wrong? How did Montreal manage to destroy such a relationship?"

"It wasn't Montreal Chris," Bret managed. "Montreal was just the icing on the cake so to speak."

"I…I don't understand."

"And you never will unless you understand my _friendship_ with Bret," Shawn answered.

"Goddammit, did you have to say it like that?" Bret yelled.

"Say it like what Bret? Up until now you wouldn't even acknowledge the fact that we were best friends once so why should I emphasize that we were anything more?"

"You're the one that—

"No, _you're_ the one that brought it up! I just refuse to back down this time. I told you I'm not afraid to tell the truth anymore Bret. I'm tired, so fucking tired of carrying these secrets around—

"Yeah well it hasn't been exactly easy for me too you know."

"You sure as hell make it easy each time you're in front of a Canadian cameraman!"

"WELL FUCK SHAWN, WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM ME?" he screamed. "I just…I just did the unthinkable by admitting that I actually…that we were actually lovers!"

"Well good for you."

"God you're impossible!"

"And you're still a jerk!"

"I wasn't always a jerk Shawn. You forget I was your first friend in the WWF."

"Forget? That's not something you forget. I remember…I remember everything."

"Oh do you? Well let's see if you remember what I remember…"

***~*~***

Shawn and Marty finished showering then dressed quickly in silence. They grabbed their things and were about to head out the locker room when the door burst open. The Hart Foundation members, who included Bret, The British Bulldog, and Owen, were coming inside laughing and joking about something or another. David and Owen headed straight for the showers ignoring the two newcomers completely but Bret just paused at the sight of Shawn. He was no longer wearing the gay yellow tights from earlier, but the jeans he was wearing now were equally tight. His long blonde hair was clinging to the side of his face dripping wet and he was wearing a skin tight white tank. Bret had to catch himself. It was unlike him to pay so close attention to anyone especially a guy but Shawn was hardly a guy. With his curly wet hair, soft face, and striking blue eyes, it was kind of easy to forget the 'man' part of him. _I must be joking…_ He quickly cut his eyes towards Marty who looked downright sick.

"Hey dude, you're alright?" Shawn cut his eyes to Marty who just barely managed to nod.

"Yeah. I'm cool," he squeaked. He forced a smile though Bret could tell he was still kind of shaken up. Marty turned to Shawn. "Uh…I'll go start the car." And with that he quickly scrambled out of the room.

"Is he really alright?" Bret asked. Shawn blinked a few times a little taken back that a superstar like Bret was speaking to him.

"Yeah. He uh…he'll be fine. I guess."

"Oh okay." There was a long pause. "Uh…so…"

"I'm sorry." Shawn stuck out his hand. "I'm Shawn. Shawn Michaels." Bret gave him a short, firm handshake.

"Bret. I talked to your partner earlier. I don't know if he told you but a couple of the guys were giving him a hard time, even tried to pick a fight with him."

"He didn't wanna tell me but I kind of figured."

"Yeah. They said some pretty mean things to him. It's really none of my business but if your boy ever hopes to make it around here he's gotta buck up. If they know he's weak—

"He's not weak!" Shawn snapped.

"Hey! Whoa, I'm sorry. Just trying to help." Shawn let out a sigh.

"Look, I'm…I'm sorry. It's just…Marty's very…"

"I know."

"You know?" Shawn frowned.

"I watched the two of you wrestle tonight. You two did good, but I can tell Marty's not the most confident of people. It was written all over his face during the match."

"Yeah. It's really a long story but I'd rather not get into it."

"Don't worry about it. I shouldn't be all in your business. But uh…I just thought I'd tell you about your match. You guys are good. Keep it up. The guys will come around eventually." Shawn smiled.

"Thanks. Thanks a lot. Well uh…see ya around," he grinned before hurrying away. When he was gone Bret let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding.

"Wow. Just wow bro." Bret turned to see Owen leaning next to one of the lockers with a towel wrapped around his waist.

"What do you mean 'wow'?"

"You're really fascinated with the newcomers aren't you?"

"Well…not really. I just think they have a lot of potential."

"You're just like father. You know that?"

"Yeah well I can't help what I see." Owen quirked his brow.

"Yes well one can't help but wonder what _else_ you noticed," he teased. Bret frowned.

"What the hell does that supposed to mean?"

"Oh well you know…" Owen smirked. "He is quite pretty. A little too pretty for his own good wouldn't you agree?" Bret stared at his bro.

"I…wouldn't know. You know full well I'm only interested in women. I'd never embarrass my family by looking at another guy. That's disgusting!"

"Oh come off it Bret. Just because you notice some things about other guys doesn't make you a queer. Besides, from the looks of it, Shawn is with…what's his name?"

"Marty."

"Yes Marty so even if you were gay you wouldn't stand a chance." Bret laughed at his brother.

"Stop joking around Owen. One of these days you're going to get yours if you don't lay off. What other people do is their business now I'm going to shower."

"Bar in an hour?"

"You know it."

***~*~***

"For someone who's completely and totally devoted to women, you sure as hell noticed a whole lot about me that night."

"Like my brother said, noticing things about other men doesn't mean you're gay. Besides, it's not like I tried to grope you or something."

"Whatever," Shawn mumbled.

"Not my fault you looked like a girl," Bret teased.

"I did not look like a girl!" Shawn huffed. "I just…long hair was the style back then. Besides you're one to talk. You wore _pink_ in the ring and had pretty long hair yourself."

"But no one would ever think me pretty."

"Oh so I was pretty to you?"

"No you just…you know what? I'm not going to go there."

"Chicken."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me." Bret balled up his fists in frustration but then a wry smile crept up on his face. _I'll fix him…_

"So was _Marty_ pretty to you?" Bret asked casually. "I'm sure he had to be since the two of you were lovers. No one in their right mind would screw someone they found to be unattractive." That did it for Shawn. He jumped out of his chair and started pounding away at the divider.

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH! DON'T YOU _DARE _SPEAK OF HIM!" Shawn yelled.

"Oh my. Why so touchy?"

"I HATE YOU! BASTARD! YOU KNOW FULL WELL THAT I WAS SAD ABOUT MARTY. HE…HE WAS MY ONLY FRIEND! I WAS DEVASTATED WHEN HE LEFT ME!"

"Then maybe you shouldn't have run him off like you did all of your other lovers!" Shawn opened his mouth to speak but all he did was choke, no longer being able to hold back the tears.

"Oh God," he cried. "How…could you be so cruel?" Shawn leaned against the glass divider and started sobbing. "You…you know I told you about Marty."

"Yes you did but not everything." Shawn glared at the wall.

"You knew he was weak," Shawn cried. "You knew that from day one yet you didn't—

"Hey, I tried to help him alright? I did try! I mentored to him—

"But not hard enough. You were afraid to be around him and me at first because you were so scared you were going to be labeled gay."

"That's not—

"THAT'S THE TRUTH AND YOU KNOW IT! MARTY LEFT BECAUSE HE COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! HE…HE COULDN'T TAKE THE PAIN! IT…it hurt him to hear people whispering lies about us behind our backs. If you were such a good friend—

"I DID HELP HIM THAT NIGHT SHAWN! YOU HAVE NO IDEA—

"YEAH WELL YOU WAITED TOO LATE BRET! You waited too late…The damage had already been done…"

**~*~*~**

Marty stood under the steaming water sighing happily as the water trickled down his sore body. What a night he thought. They'd been working house show and tapings of Raw at least five of seven days a week for almost two years now. They were yet to have a break but Marty wasn't complaining. He was just happy to be in the running for tag team gold soon especially since it took him and Shawn so long to get to this point. They'd been solid since day one but after being suspended for supposed 'drug abuse', both Marty and Shawn had to take the back seat to other, less talented guys. It hurt like hell but what could they do about it? Shawn pleaded to Vince that it was a mistake. Neither one of them were doing drugs…well, the occasional sleeping pill from time to time but nothing major. However, the drug test said otherwise and so they were suspended. After a month off, they came back determined to prove everyone that they were made to wear gold. _It's been two years and we're still ignored and treated like crap. _

Marty raised his head wetting his face before staring back down at the floor. They'd been wrestling together here for almost two years and still no one took them seriously. And to make matters worse, everyone said bad things about them behind their backs, especially about Shawn. _Shawn's a great guy. He's gotta know what people are saying about us and yet he doesn't let it bother him. Shawn's amazing. I don't know what I'd do without him._

"Mmm well. What have we got here?" Marty jumped and turned around. _Oh God…_ It was the same guys that smacked him around on his first night here. Kenneth and the one they called A. Johnson stood before him smiling sadistically.

"Uh…I was just leaving. So I'll just…"

"Oh no. You stay right there," Kenneth commanded. "Don't think we don't know about you and Shawn. Quite frankly A.J and I aren't at all disgusted it by it."

"Oh no," A.J growled. "In fact, we find it quite the turn on."

"I…I don't know what you mean," Marty stammered. Kenneth rolled his eyes before running up on Marty shoving him back against the tile.

"You two are gay but let's face it, you're both too pretty for your own good." Kenneth pressed his nose against Marty's neck taking in his scent. "Mmm…A.J he sure smells good."

"I bet he does."

"Guys…guys please—

_Smack!_ Kenneth slapped Marty as hard as he could across the jaw.

"Shut up!" he snapped. "You belong to us for now so you better do as you're told or else." Marty could only nod his head for fear of crying. "Very good," Kenneth whispered. "Now on your knees." Marty stared at him, clearly confused by the order until he saw A.J. pulling off his tights. _Oh God…_ Kenneth reached in his tights pulling out his throbbing cock. He looked back at his friend grinning before turning back to Marty. "Open wide punk." Kenneth grabbed a handful of Marty's hair tugging on it until the blonde finally opened his mouth. Kenneth shoved his cock in Marty's mouth making him gag. "Oh shut up and take it blondie. You know you like this kind of thing," he growled. Kenneth moved Marty's head back and forth over his cock. "Oh fuck yes…take it…that's it…fuck," he moaned. Marty's eyes were just pouring warm tears as he did the unthinkable. Every time he tried to pull away, Kenneth would pull his hair making him choke. "Oh fuck! I'm about to cum." Kenneth slammed Marty's mouth with his cock one last time, his knees buckling from the pleasure. He held Marty's head over his cock causing him to choke and gag as he cummed in his mouth. "Ahhh….fuck," he moaned. When he was done he pulled Marty to his feet and shoved him against the wall. "All yours A.J," he grinned.

"No…guys please…" A.J. clasped his waist pulling his ass against his cock.

"Shut up boy and get ready to take this cock. If you don't we'll get pretty little boyfriend next and you don't want that do you?" Without preparing him, A.J. slammed into him.

"OH GOD!" Marty screamed.

"Ohh….fuck so fucking tight!" A.J. pounded into him harder and faster, loving the way Marty fit so snug around his thick cock. Marty just held onto the tile crying uncontrollably from the pain. He felt like his insides were being ripped to shreds and he could feel the warm blood running down his legs. A.J. leaned closer to him, running his thick tongue along side Marty's ear.

"Oh fuck cutie…You're so tight. So fucking tight and good…fuck…" He slammed into him faster and harder. Pretty soon Marty's body started to feel a sickening pleasure from his assaulters. The next slam hit his prostate causing him to cry out from a mixture of pain and pleasure.

"Oh God!" he moaned. A.J. and Kenneth both grinned.

"Aww…you like that cutie?" they teased. "Well too bad because I'm about to cum." A.J slammed into him hard one last time before filling him with his juices. He pulled away and Marty collapsed on the floor sobbing.

"See you tomorrow punk," Kenneth growled before they left.

**~*~*~**

Bret closed his eyes fighting hard to keep from crying. He had no idea that Marty was being raped but even if he knew, the real question that nagged him now is, would he have cared enough to help him? A single tear rolled down Bret's cheek and then another…and another until tears just flowed on their own. Chris however, was beyond hiding his sadness. His eyes were puffy and red as he sat there staring at the floor. Bret looked towards the divider just barely being able to make out Shawn's form.

"I didn't know. I give you my word that I didn't know." Shawn wiped his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Yeah well now you do," he answered softly. Bret closed his eyes reminding himself of the timid little Marty that he knew back when. He was a pretty decent guy. They had spoken on several occasions before and after matches. Shawn of course, had no idea of their secret friendship but it was out of respect for Marty. Since Marty seemed to have a sort of dependency on others, Bret only wanted to help him learn to stand on his own. Marty appreciated Bret because he allowed him to fight his own battles within reason unlike Shawn who always wanted to be his protector. _But I never knew that he was being raped. If I knew…I swear I would have stood up for him._ His thoughts left Marty and an image of a young Shawn was placed in front of him. He was ashamed to admit it, but back then, Shawn really was a beautiful man. Everything about him had been perfect. Too perfect which scared Bret to this day and yet…

"I'm really sorry about what happened to Marty but…" Bret closed his eyes and an image of a sweet, innocent looking Shawn stared back at him. His long hair enclosed his face highlighting those beautiful blue jewels. His beautiful smile just made his heart melt to pieces. _I couldn't imagine… I couldn't imagine anyone hurting him like that._ "I'm just glad it wasn't you." Bret listened as Shawn broke down once more. By now, Chris had given up and was just as caught up in the story as Bret. Chris' hands were covering his face as he silently wept for both men. Shawn on the other hand just couldn't stop crying. It hurt him so much. Although he and Marty were never really gay, it was after Marty left when Shawn realized that he loved him.

"Shawn? Shawn please…don't cry." Bret's voice was cracking up betraying him in every possible way but he couldn't help it. He could remember seeing Shawn cry once. It hurt him to heart then and it was hurting him now. Bret stood to his feet and went over to the divider. "Shawn…Shawn come on now," he begged. "You're…I'm supposed to hate you right now but I can't because you're crying…and now I'm crying. I hate seeing you cry and it's just as bad listening to it. You…you always do this to me ya know? You make me feel things that I shouldn't be feeling and it's wrong. God it's so wrong but I can't stand it. I can't stand to hear you cry for him so stop it!"

"Why are you trying to console me?" Shawn whispered. "You don't know what it feels like…"

"Shawn I…I may not know exactly what you're feeling but I know how I'd feel if I knew it happened to you." _I couldn't bare it. I hate you but I don't… God these feelings!_

"How Bret? How would you feel?" His voice was low and gruff but it was filled with a sadness that shook Bret to the very core.

"I'd…I'd hurt Shawn," he breathed. "I'd hurt so much because I couldn't imagine anyone hurting you like that." _You were so innocent…and so beautiful…_

"I guess not everyone shared the same feelings because they got me too. The very next night they got me too."


	5. Marty & Me Part I

**AN: This chapter turned out to be pretty long so I split it the best way I could. It was hard because you can't interrupt the flow of the dialogue otherwise it sucks. So...I chose a flashback area to interrupt. I'm really sorry for the long chapters but since I'm not updating quickly then most of you should be happy. Also, I now own Bret Hart's DVD biography. It's conveniently placed right next to Heartbreak and Triumph. If you don't own either of these DVD's then you need to get them. Well worth the buy and very informative. Even though I've heard both their sides, I'm still using my writer's gut instinct and the story will continue as I planned. It won't be too much longer because I didn't want to make this story too long. So...yeah.**

* * *

"I…I don't…" Bret leaned back against the divider for he was barely able to speak or stand from the shock. _Raped…They raped…Shawn?_ He couldn't believe it and yet he knew it was plausible. Shawn was never the manliest of men and when he first made his debut in the business, a lot of guys hated him for being so girlish. Even Bret grew to hate him for it eventually but for different reasons than most.

Bret somehow managed to get back to his seat before his legs could give out on him. As he sat in his chair, he tried to recall the details of the night Shawn spoke of. He too had run into Marty that night but it was before Kenneth and A.J. smacked him around a bit. _Where was I when they got to Marty?_ It took him a minute but it finally dawned on him why he wasn't able to help Marty. _I was out drinking with the guys that night. Damn. _Bret was truly sorry for what happened to Marty but in the end, it wasn't his fault. He'd gone for the night so there was no possible way he could have been there for Marty but Shawn…

Bret glanced over at the divider and saw that Shawn was back in his seat though he was eerily quiet. Bret sighed. _I want to ask what happened but I don't know if I could handle it. _Bret looked over at Chris waiting for him to ask another question but he didn't. Instead he just continued to stare at the floor as if at a lost for words. Bret finally couldn't take the silence anymore. He knew he would probably regret it later but what the hell? It driving him crazy especially since he was certain that he'd spoken with Shawn that very same night but he had to be sure; he _needed_ to be sure.

"Shawn I…I really don't…know if I could handle hearing about your rape but I need to know. For peace of mind I need to know. That night…did I speak to you right after it happened?" _Please say no…please say no…_ Bret couldn't see him but Chris nodded his head for him. "Oh…I…" _That's why he was crying…_

"Shawn do you want to tell us what happened during your conversation with Bret?" Chris asked. Bret shook his head.

"No. Let…let me. I…"

"I need to tell you how it happened," Shawn said softly cutting him off.

"Shawn look, you don't have to—

"If I don't then you will never understand why Marty and I were so close." Shawn took a deep breath and spoke softly. "I was…that night changed my life forever. I might have even brought the rape on myself and while it may have screwed me up forever, I don't regret it happening"

"What do you mean?" Chris asked. "How could anyone bring such a thing on himself and why don't you regret it?" Shawn wiped his eyes and somehow managed to chuckle a bit.

"Well, to address your first question…I suppose one could say I had somewhat of a big mouth."

"_Somewhat?_" Bret coughed.

"Tsk…alright," Shawn replied rolling his eyes, "maybe I had a _BIG_ mouth but I don't care. At the time, I had to stand up for my partner. It was me and him against the world. We had no one else. Two years we'd been wrestling for Vince and even though we were as solid as ever, people were still ignoring us. Well…except behind the scenes," he added bitterly.

"Oh?" Chris asked.

"Yeah but that's a whole other story. About the rape…you see I stormed the locker rooms later that night. It was after I'd sent Marty back to the hotel. I think he knew I was up to something but he did as he was told and left me all alone."

"Why didn't you take him with you?" Bret asked.

"Because I figured I could handle it on my own."

"Yeah and what a job you did," Bret mumbled.

"Well I was under the impression that you could give a shit," Shawn snapped.

"You know what? Forget it. I'll just stay over here."

"You do that."

"So Shawn, what did you do? What did you say to them?" Chris asked.

"When I found both Kenneth and A.J., they were just stepping out of the showers. Both had towels around them and seemed pretty shocked to see me standing there glaring at them from a distance. They smirked at me ya know? Then completely ignored me and went back to their conversation. It pissed me off but at the same time it was an opportunity for me to leave without getting hurt."

"I thought you said you could handle it?" Chris asked.

"Yeah I know. At the time, I was a hothead who could just about handle anything."

"That's for damn sure," Bret mumbled, but Shawn ignored him and continued on.

"In my head I could handle them…well, with words, but I always had the common sense to know that physically, I didn't stand a chance except in the ring. I debated the issue in my head with my common sense winning me over in the end."

"So…so if you left the locker room, how'd you—

"I never left," Shawn answered cutting Chris off. "Something they said triggered the emotional, non-rational part of me and I exploded."

"What…did they say?" Chris asked.

"They…called him their little bitch and I…didn't appreciate it."

**~*~*~**

Shawn lunged at Kenneth while his back was turned rushing him into the locker.

"Hey…what the…?"

"YOU TAKE THAT BACK!" Shawn screamed. He tussled Kenneth to the floor and just pounded into him with his fists. Kenneth held his hands up in an attempt to block his face but Shawn managed to land one right across his eye.

"Ahh A.J. get him off me!" Shawn felt himself being picked up and soon he was the one being shoved against the lockers.

"Ugh…let me go!" Shawn snapped but he was being firmly held in place by A.J. By now, Kenneth was on his feet completely in the nude. His towel had fallen off at some point during their tussle leaving him exposed. Shawn moved his head a bit but A.J. grabbed a handful of hair banging his head against the steel lockers. "Ahh God," Shawn moaned.

"Shut up!" Kenneth hissed. "Shut your face you son-of-a-bitch! Just who the hell do you think you are…putting your hands on me like that?"

"Marty's not your bitch!" Shawn spat.

"A.J. shut him up please," Kenneth said lazily. Shawn's head bounced off the steel again several times while Kenneth laughed. "That's enough A.J. I think he's learned his lesson." A.J. released his grip on Shawn's hair giving Shawn a moment's relief. That moment was short lived when his hands were being forced behind his back.

"What the…?" Shawn started but his face was pressed into the steel hard while his hands were locked in place by strong hands. "Let me go!" He suddenly felt warm breath near his ear and he cringed.

"Not until you apologize," Kenneth answered softly. Shawn knew he was in a bad position but he refused to apologize to them for hurting Marty. If anything they needed to apologize to him.

"Like hell I will!"

"Then you will get the same kind of treatment as Marty," Kenneth growled. "Hold him steady A.J. This one is _mine._" Shawn felt hands feverishly exploring his backside and it made him cringe. He twisted and screamed at them trying to get away but A.J. would just smack him in the face.

"Shut up!" he growled. A.J. continued to hold Shawn steady while Kenneth pulled down his tights. Shawn cringed at the feel of cool hands on his bare ass.

"Fuck let me go you bastards!"

"Not until you apologize."

"Fuck you!" Shawn yelled.

"Naa," Kenneth laughed. "Fuck YOU!" Kenneth gripped his hips pulling his ass out against him. Shawn struggled to free himself but it was too late. Without preparing him Kenneth settled himself at his entrance thrusting hard inside of him. Shawn screamed from the pain, his insides feeling as though they were ripping in shreds.

"AHHH GOD!"

"Shut up!" Kenneth screamed. "You wanted to be big and bad so suck it up. Take this punishment like a real man. Marty certainly did. In fact you're nothing but a whiny bitch compared to him." Shawn bit his lip, whimpering softly as Kenneth pounded into him. It hurt Shawn so much and though he felt like screaming in agony, he needed to be strong for Marty. Tears streamed down Shawn's face as Kenneth caressed his sides, every now and then planting soft kisses on his back. He hated it but after a while Shawn found himself holding back the urge to moan in pleasure. A hand suddenly clasped his member then came the warm breath near his ear again. "I know you feel it Shawn…the pleasure," he whispered. "Marty did too and unlike you, he cried out for more. But you…I'm going to make you cum harder than ever before because you're going to be my new bitch whether you like it or not."

"Stop! Get you hands off me!" he breathed, doing his best to ignore the pleasure.

"Oh but Shawn you're so good…and so tight." He ran his fingers through Shawn's hair making him shudder as he pounded into him faster and harder…

**~*~*~**

"Enough! I can't…I can't listen to this anymore!" Bret's knuckles were whiter than ever. He didn't realize it but the entire time Shawn was telling his story, he had been gripping the sides of his chair furiously. _How dare they rape him! And why…why didn't he ever tell me this?!_ Bret turned his head towards the divider glaring angrily at Shawn. "Why? Why didn't you ever tell me about this?"

"It was none of your concern."

"_None of my concern?_ Are you shitting me?" _It was every bit of my concern…_

"Oh don't try to act all 'big brother' on me now Bret," Shawn growled. "You know full well you and I weren't all that close. In fact, I'd hardly call us friends at the time."

"Yeah but you know I would have helped you Shawn. I could have…" _I ruled that locker room…me and my family…I could have stopped them… _Bret banged his fist on the arm rest angrily. He just couldn't understand why Shawn wouldn't talk to him about it. _Even after we were together, he never said a word about it…_ "I just don't understand you. Why do you always have to be so independent? Why can't you admit that you need help sometimes?"

"You're the same way."

"I wasn't as bad as you."

"Whatever Bret. Chris, can we get a move on now?"

"Oh yes. Of course. So uh…" Chris cleared his throat. "Yeah so Shawn, I know talking about the rape was very hard for you but before we got into it, you said that in a way you don't regret it happening. Can you tell us why?" Chris asked. Chris thought about letting it go being as the entire time Shawn was speaking, Bret was losing his cool but he needed to know. Most people would erupt into uncontrollable sobs and start damning to hell anyone involved in the raping but not Shawn. In fact, Shawn calmly told the story of his rape while crying almost the entire time when he spoke of Marty. Chris needed to get to the bottom of it and he was sure Bret was just as eager to know why as well. Shawn took a deep breath then spoke up again.

"You're right. I did say that and it's the truth. Yes, it hurt. It hurt a lot that night but the physical pain was nothing compared to all of the emotional pain. I suffered a lot but I was somehow able to hide it from Marty. I didn't want him know and I begged the guys afterwards to keep it a secret. Of course," he chuckled. "Nothing's free in this world."

"What do you mean?" Chris asked.

"I…kinda…had to agree to some things, but at the time I thought it was for the best. It was no secret that I was a lot stronger emotionally than Marty so it was a small price to pay to see him happy again."

"So…what exactly did you agree to do?" Chris asked. "Or would you rather not say?"

"No, he needs to say," Bret snapped. "He needs to say because I want to know. What exactly did you agree to Michaels?"

"What's it to you Bret?" Shawn snapped back. "Not like it matters to you anyway. You hated me; didn't want to be seen near me after the rumors started."

"That's not true!"

"Yes it is and you know it! Kenneth…Kenneth and A.J. made sure everyone knew that I was supposedly gay and it didn't help that everyone thought that to begin with."

"Hey that's your own fault."

"Maybe so but I was not gay at the time. Marty and me were just two guys who loved wrestling. We had a lot in common and had pretty much the same likes and dislikes. That's why we connected so well. Plus, I was young and alone. My parents hated the idea of me wrestling so I was pretty much on my own. Marty filled that empty void in my life. That's why when he left, I was devastated."

"So they spread rumors that you were gay?" Chris inquired.

"Yeah but that wasn't part of the arrangement." He sighed. "You see, I made a deal with the guys. They uh…Kenneth seemed to like me a lot. Said I was one of the prettiest guys he'd ever seen and was willing to be a lot nicer to me if I agreed to be his 'play thing' as he worded it." Bret cut his eyes away from the divider cursing silently. Bret remembered Kenneth to be this really tough guy. He was excellent in the ring and earned his popularity for his masterful submission holds. He was also the typical jock wrestler having played football during his college years. Everyone who knew him thought he was a bit full of himself and he had a habit of scaring the new comers. Bret knew these things but he never knew Kenneth to be so manipulative.

"So did you…agree to it?" Chris asked.

"I didn't want to do it," Shawn answered. "But the offer…I had to protect Marty."

"By giving yourself to that lunatic?!" Bret exclaimed.

"It wasn't your decision to make," Shawn answered lazily. "I did what I had to do to protect the only person who mattered to me."

"So you loved him?" Bret sneered. "Is that what you're trying to say?"

"I guess I did."

"Figures."

"You know what Bret? Now would not be a good time for you to start preaching to me about love, especially since you haven't the first clue about real love in the first place."

"Whatever."

"Anyway Chris, as I was saying…I made the deal with Kenneth and for a while it went pretty good. No, I wasn't at all happy about being used like that but at the same time, Marty was smiling again. Kenneth even apologized to Marty one day and never bothered him again."

"So how often did you have to...you know," Bret asked. He was trying not to sound overly curious but deep down, he really wanted to know.

"You know for someone who claims to hate me so much, he sure as hell isn't doing a very good job right now."

"Fine then. Don't answer," Bret snarled. "Everyone knows you were a little slut so I'm sure it was pretty often."

"See that's your problem. That's ALWAYS been your problem. You can't believe everything you hear Bret and for the record, I didn't become said slut until after you left me. Before that, I had only been with three guys in my life: Kenneth, Marty, and YOU!"

"Don't add me to your list of boy toys Shawn."

"And don't _you_ try to assume you know _anything_ about my sex life. Anyway Chris, it started off with me giving him hand jobs in the showers. I hated it, but it wasn't so bad compared to what they did to others."

"There were others?"

"Yeah, but after a while, Kenneth started focusing all of his attention on me, and that's when he started wanting more."

"Did he hurt you?" Chris asked. Shawn sighed.

"No…not really. The first couple of times I got slapped around a bit because I talk too much, but after a while I quit putting up a fight. I reminded myself that it was for Marty and…I don't know. I got kind of used to it. Plus – and I really hate to admit this – but he started spending most of his time trying to please me. It was…weird."

"He was obsessed with you," Bret said softly.

"I…suppose you could say that," Shawn agreed. "He would say things to me during sex, play in my hair…I can even remember him calling me his 'doll' once," Shawn laughed. "But all joking aside, he never hurt me. Just wanted to play with me I guess."

"So the way you talk it seemed like it was a pretty decent arrangement. If you had no problems with it then why did Marty leave? What exactly went wrong?" Shawn's face quickly turned into one of pure disgust.

"Kenneth told him," Shawn said angrily. "He messed around and told Marty what was going on between us and it ruined everything." Bret laughed out loud at this. "What's so funny Bret?" he snapped.

"Well you know what they say, karma's a bitch. I can't believe you'd even cheat on your boyfriend like that anyway."

"How many times do I have to tell you? Marty was _NOT _my boyfriend! In fact, we'd never even had sex."

"But you said a while ago that—

"I said that we slept together but not like you think. The first time we made love was the last time because he left me. I woke up the next morning and he was gone. We wrestled our match that night and then he took off."

"You mean to tell me that in all the years you two were together you only had sex once?" Bret asked. _I could have sworn…I just __**knew**__ they were lovers… _Shawn quickly stood to his feet and approached the divider. In his softest, sweetest voice he responded.

"That's right and you know what else Bret? That one time we made love was probably more meaningful than any of the times I was with you."

"I doubt that," he scoffed.

"So Shawn," Chris began, "After Marty found out, what exactly happened between you two?"

"Here's the thing, I never knew that Marty knew until the night we made love because he broke down and told me. Before that time though, we were both making plans to start singles wrestling. Marty and I both gave Vince the Barber Shop idea so that Marty and I could feud. However, Marty never told me that he was planning on retiring after I beat him."

"So all of this came out the night you two…?"

"Yeah." Shawn leaned back against the divider and closed his eyes. "Everything came out that night…"


	6. Marty & Me Part II

Shawn and Marty entered their hotel room in complete silence. Shawn didn't know why it seemed so tense all of a sudden but he was sure Marty would speak up when he got ready. Since Kenneth decided to go out drinking tonight, Shawn was able to ride back with Marty for the first time in almost two weeks. Shawn waited to see if Marty was going to shower first but instead he sat on the edge of his bed staring at the floor.

"Uh…Marty? You alright man?"

"Oh yeah." He looked up and smiled warmly. "Of course."

"Oh okay. Well um…you wanna shower first or can I?"

"No. Go ahead and shower."

"Alright," he grinned. Shawn grabbed his favorite boxers and headed to take a quick shower. When he finally emerged from the restroom, Marty was waiting to get him a shower as well. He smiled warmly at Shawn as he hurried past him into the restroom. _Well I suppose he's alright then…_ Shawn went and collapsed on his bed. He was tired and sore from tonight's match among other things. _That last time has really got me sore but I'll be alright._ Shawn laid in bed doing his best to wait up for Marty but the exhaustion soon overtook him and he fell fast asleep.

When Marty emerged from the restroom, he wasn't at all surprised to see Shawn fast asleep. He really didn't want to wake him but he needed to talk with him before it was too late. With a reluctant sigh, he passed over his own bed and sat down next to Shawn. Shawn's gorgeous curly locks were sticking to the side of his face half covering one of his eyelids. Marty reached up to brush the hair out of his face ignoring the fact that he was well aware of how soft Shawn's skin felt.

"Hey Shawn." He shook him a little stirring him awake. "Shawn. Wake up. I need to talk with you." Shawn's eyes fluttered open and he yawned muttering something incoherently. When his eyes finally adjusted to the semi darkness of the room, he quickly sat up wondering what could be bothering Marty so.

"Is…Is something wrong?" he asked sleepily.

"Shawn…" he sighed. "I…I know about you and Kenneth." There was a long pause as Shawn took in Marty's words. _So he knows so what now?_ Shawn didn't really know how to respond so he just stayed silent. Marty reached out and touched his shoulder. "You don't have to say anything because I know why. He told me and when he did I…I freaked out."

"Marty look, I didn't mean—

"It's okay Shawn," he nodded. "I know and I understand. I just…I'm just sorry that I didn't notice."

"You weren't supposed to notice Marty and I wasn't planning on telling you either."

"I know that but Shawn, you can't keep fighting my battles for me."

"I'm not trying to fight them. I was just trying to get a little retribution. They hurt you Marty and I could tell that you were at your breaking point. I didn't want to lose you. I still don't wanna lose you. You're all I have and you know that." Marty reached out and cupped his face.

"I know you care Shawn and I feel the same way about you, which is why after our match tomorrow I am leaving."

"What? Leaving? What do you mean leaving?" he frowned. He was not liking the sound of this and he hoped this was just some kind of joke.

"I'm retiring Shawn. I just…my heart's not in it anymore."

"That's a lie and you know it!" Shawn snapped. "Why are you doing this? Why are you giving up on me?" Shawn was nearing the point of tears because he didn't understand it. Marty loved wrestling and for the past few weeks he seemed happy as he kicked everyone's ass in the ring but now all of a sudden he wanted out? Shawn wasn't taking that for an answer.

"Shawn listen, we both know you're the better wrestler."

"That's not true Marty. I'm just quicker."

"Yeah well you're going to be the one that stands out as time progresses. I mean look at you. You're in the best shape of your life and you look damn good. That long, beautiful blonde hair and blue eyes…Not only are you good looking but you're also the best wrestler on the roster. I don't wanna compete with you and I don't want you taking on my battles."

"Then I'll stop. I'll do whatever you want—

"No you won't Shawn. You'll try for a while but in the end you'll end up helping me again and I don't want that. I need to grow up. I need to learn to stand on my own and the only way I can do that is if I leave your side for a while."

"But you can't Marty!" he choked. "If you leave me then I'll be all alone. I'll have no one."

"You're strong Shawn. Really brave and strong. I believe in my heart that you'll find a way to keep on moving. Don't give up on your dream."

"It's not worth it if I don't have anyone to share it with," he cried. Marty pulled his friend into his chest while he sobbed.

"It's okay Shawn. It's okay," he whispered. "I'll be around. It's not like this is forever."

"I know but just the thought of losing you is bad enough." Marty looked down at Shawn and sighed.

"Shawn…I've made up my mind and I'm going to do this – for us. But before I go…before we part, I want you to do something for me." Shawn pulled away wiping his eyes in the process.

"Sure," he nodded. "Anything for you."

"Shawn I…I want you to make love to me." Shawn just stared at him.

"Wha…What?" he stammered. Marty gripped his shoulders lightly looking his friend in the eye.

"I want you to make love to me."

"Wow…Marty I…"

"I know you didn't expect this but just hear me out. I know that you and I both consider ourselves straight but…Shawn I'd be lying to you if I said I haven't felt something for you all this time."

"But Marty I…I can't…I just…I'll hurt you and…"

"Shawn if you don't do this for me then I hope it's because you're disgusted with men. Otherwise, are you really going to deny your best friend his last request?"

"No…of course not Marty. Look, I don't…have a problem with guys. Kenneth pretty much nipped that in the bud but I can't…I'm afraid I'll hurt you and I don't want to do that. You can't make me Marty."

"I feel the same way about you Shawn but if you don't do this – if you don't take control, then I'm going to take you myself."

"I'm…sorry Marty but I just can't."

"Then so be it." Marty shoved Shawn back onto the bed and covered his lips. Shawn didn't fight him. In fact, he eagerly welcomed him, deepening the kiss. Their tongues fought for dominance with Marty finally winning him over. A low growl escaped from the back of Shawn's throat making Marty instantly hard. He put his full weight on his partner as he tore his lips away to suck on his neck. Shawn felt himself getting aroused and it was all he could do to encourage Marty to relieve him. Marty's hand slid down his chest slipping easily into his boxers clasping his erection. Shawn whimpered from his touch but then just as quickly Marty drew his hand back.

"Mn…Marty don't tease," he moaned. "Please…just…just touch me." Marty started moving his hand pumping Shawn's member. The blonde moved with his hand, thrusting and moaning with pleasure. His climax came quickly covering Marty's hand with his release. Marty took his lips for another kiss only to be thrown off by Shawn flipping them over. Now Shawn hovered over him staring down at him with pure desire. He brought his lips to Marty's then trailed tiny wet kisses down his chest. His hands played with Marty's rosy duds pinching them to draw needful moans from him.

"Mn…Shawn…don't stop," he breathed. Shawn had no intentions of stopping. He reached up to pull Marty's shorts off of him then he completely covered his erection with his mouth. "Oh fuck Shawn!" he gasped. Shawn wasn't used to doing this being that he was usually the one on the receiving end but thanks to Kenneth, he had a pretty good idea how it was supposed to go. Deeper into his mouth he took Marty making him moan with pleasure. The sound was music to his ears. He suddenly gave a gentle hum sending shockwaves through Marty's body. That was all it took. "Fuck Shawn!" he screamed as he orgasmed. Shawn thought he would be able to get out of it but Marty rolled over on his back.

"Come on Shawn. I want you to take me."

"Marty—

"Shawn please?" he begged. "Please take me." With a reluctant sigh, Shawn clasped his hips pulling him near. He inserted a finger and then another to prepare him. Kenneth did it to him the last couple of times and it made things a lot less painful. Marty whimpered for a moment but after a while he started welcoming the intruding fingers. "Shawn, God Shawn I need you inside me." Without another seconds delay, Shawn thrust inside him. Marty was so hot and tight; it was better than he could have imagined in his dreams.

"Oh my…Fuck Marty…" He couldn't help it. As much as he wanted to take his time, he was quickly losing himself in Marty's tight heat. He gripped his hips tighter pounding into him faster and harder. Marty threw his head back moaning with pleasure, his hips moving to match his rhythm. "Fuck Marty…I'm about to cum!" With one final thrust Shawn exploded inside of Marty. They both collapsed onto the bed, sweating and smelling of sex. Marty rolled over and pulled Shawn on top of him capturing his lips for a kiss. It was slow and sensual but the message in the kiss was quite clear and when they finally pulled apart, they just lay there in each other's arms until Shawn drifted off to sleep.

**~*~*~**

Bret slowly stood to his feet and walked out of the room. Chris didn't even try to stop him because he was pretty sure he knew how Bret was feeling. From the way the interview was going, he was certain Bret was trying to hide the fact that he was ever in love with Shawn and just hearing him describe how he made love to another was enough to make him crazy jealous. _Poor Bret…_ Chris' eyes rounded on Shawn who was now just sitting there quietly staring at his nearly empty bottle. _Maybe I should go check on him…_ Chris stood to his feet to go after him.

"No…don't Chris," Shawn said softly. "Give him some time. If he doesn't come back then you can finish getting my side. It's the least I can do for all your trouble." Chris sat back down like he was told and they both just waited in silence.

Meanwhile, Bret stood outside the door with his back against the door. It was all he could do to calm his body down. He was experiencing so many emotions that he wasn't really sure what to do with himself. While he was listening to Shawn describe his rape, it was slowly tearing him apart but then just as quickly, his pity turned to anger when Shawn announced that it was okay. How could anyone do what he did he wondered? How was that really okay? Shawn explained it as best as he could but all this talk of love was making his head hurt. People all over the world do crazy things for love but Shawn…he did something that Bret just couldn't see himself doing, not even for his wife and it scared him. _Does this mean my love for her is actually superficial? Does it mean I never really loved her at all? Dammit I knew I shouldn't have come here! Shawn always makes me question my beliefs. I hate him…I hate him so much! And yet…_

He closed his eyes as the image Shawn created forced its way into his brain. He could easily picture Shawn writhing beneath Marty as he stroked him senseless; the low moans escaping his beautiful lips beyond his control. The image was actually kind of hot but that only angered him even more. _I'm not…I'm not gay but Shawn was mine. Just the thought of someone else touching him like that… _Bret cursed himself silently. _Who am I kidding? I'm being a total loser and a crybaby._ _I'm happily married and I don't care for him at all._ Even the thought in his head seemed to sicken him. Bret's body started to tremble uncontrollably. He folded his arms across his chest as tears streamed down his face. He hated Shawn Michaels…or at least that's what he told himself for years. But now that he was starting to learn more about him, it was getting harder to hide buried feelings – feelings he wasn't sure of at the moment. He thought about leaving the building. If he just walked away now then he wouldn't have to hear anymore. He would never have to listen to Shawn again except on TV and he could pretend that none of this ever happened, but he knew better. _If I leave now then how much better am I compared to Shawn? I called him a coward for trying to run and he decided to stay for the interview. The least I can do is practice what I preach._ Bret dried his eyes and took a deep breath. "God help me get through this," he whispered.

**x-x-x**

Chris had almost given up on Bret but a few minutes later Bret was taking his seat again waiting to continue the interview. _Wow. I certainly wasn't expecting him to come back especially after that but I guess it's safe to continue…_

"Uh…well…welcome back Bret. Uh…before we continue is there anything you'd like to say to Shawn at the present time?" Bret thought about this for a moment then shrugged.

"Glad you two finally admitted to what everyone else knew all alone."

"Which was…?"

"That you were gay for each other," he answered bitterly.

"Oh God you are so…whatever Bret. I sometimes wonder whether or not the next part of my life was really worth it."

"Yeah well I do to."

"You were a terrible friend."

"So were you."

"And a terrible boyfriend."

"We were not—

"And here we go again," Shawn scoffed. "You haven't changed a bit. You admitted to the world that we were lovers so what's the big deal about owning up to being my secret boyfriend?"

"Secret boyfriend?" Chris asked with a frown. _I'm…confused…_

"Yeah secret because he was so scared of what people would think of him even though HE pursued ME!" Shawn spat.

"Alright I've had enough of you for one day!" Bret stood up and pushed at the divider. "Get your skinny ass over here so I can rip you apart!" Shawn eagerly obliged. He stood to his feet and started making his way around the divider but Chris stopped him.

"No…no Shawn. I can't have you two fighting—

"BUT HE'S PISSING ME OFF!" Shawn screamed.

"AND SO ARE YOU!"

"BUT I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING TO YOU BRET! I'M JUST TELLING THE TRUTH! WHY IS IT SO HARD FOR YOU TO UNDERSTAND—

"WHY YOU WERE A WHORE?" he yelled. Shawn slammed his fists against the divider.

"I DID WHAT I HAD TO DO BECAUSE I LOVED HIM! AT LEAST I OWNED UP TO MY FEELINGS FOR HIM! YOU…YOU…I THOUGHT YOU ACTUALLY LOVED ME BRET! EVERYTHING YOU EVER SAID TO ME WAS A LIE!"

"I NEVER LIED TO YOU SHAWN! I ONLY LIED WHEN YOU STARTED KEEPING SECRETS FROM ME!"

"BULLSHIT BRET! YOU LIED TO ME ABOUT LEAVING. YOU LIED TO ME ABOUT OUR RELATIONSHIP—

"I'm not…I'm through arguing with you Shawn," Bret breathed.

"And I'm done arguing with you. You'll never own up to what really happened because you're a baby. A big, grown baby who still hasn't learned to take responsibility for his actions and you know what else? I said it once and I'll say it again. I screwed you at Montreal and if I had it to do over, I wouldn't change a thing. I hate you. I hate you so much," he choked. The words hit Bret like a knife to the heart and it scared him. Before today, he couldn't have cared less if Shawn hated him but now…now it seemed to matter, more than it should have. Bret stared through the divider at the figure of the blonde whose face was mirroring his. He couldn't see it clearly but he was certain Shawn looked miserable. His musings were interrupted by Chris' voice.

"Have we reached our limit or can you two calm down enough to continue?"

"I'm leaving," Shawn snapped. "I hate his guts and I don't care to hear anymore from him. It's the same as always. I'm spending most of the time defending myself and for what? At the end of the day nothing will matter. You'll show this to the WWE Universe and they won't be any closer to the truth than they was before. Screw it. I'm outta here. I don't need this kind of stress when I have someone who loves me enough to even allow me to go through with this waiting back at the hotel." Shawn grabbed his hat off the floor and started for the door. "Sorry Chris. Maybe next time we'll actually get some where."

"Shawn don't walk out that door."

"Oh shove it Bret. I'm through—

"It's true," he said quickly. "Shawn...Shawn was my boyfriend," he said softly. Chris' jaw just dropped and Shawn froze on the spot. He turned around with a confused look on his face.

"Why Bret? Why admit it now? It's not going to change anything." Bret pressed his forehead against the divider, groaning. He was giving in again and he hated it. At the same time, a part of his spirits sank a while ago when he thought Shawn was going to walk out that door for good. His soul just screamed for him to come back and without thinking he reacted. He confessed and now he had no choice but to continue. He sighed.

"Maybe not," he said softly. "But it kept you here with me."

"For a moment and now I'm leaving."

"Shawn don't go. Please," he managed. "Don't…I need you to stay." There was a long sustained silence as Bret waited for Shawn's response. He was sweating bricks and it didn't help that he was nearing the point of a breakdown. _Please…Shawn…_

"I'll probably regret this for the rest of my life but I'll stay," he mumbled. He took his seat again then glared daggers at the figure behind the divider. "Your turn to talk hotshot and if I were you, I'd make it good because I've 'bout had it with you for one day." Bret took a deep breath.

"Alright. Fair enough. Well Chris…I guess…I guess I can take it from here. Shawn...I believe I spoke to Shawn right after his rape. I also spoke with him after his final match with Marty. That's when I'd say our friendship started to develop…"

* * *

AN: Will pick up with Bret's story next time. No idea when I'll update again but I doubt it will be anytime soon.


	7. Session 4 Curiosity

"Oh man bro…Kick ass match against Kurt tonight! You guys tore the house down."

"Thanks Owen. Hope you were watching closely. You could learn a little something from your big brother," Bret teased. They were walking back towards the locker room area. Most of the guys had already left the arena since they had a long travel ahead of them. Bret didn't plan on staying long either. He was planning to hit the hotel for an hour's sleep before he too had to get on the road for a five hour drive to Halifax. When the reached the locker room area, Owen glanced at his watch and groaned. "What's up? What was that groan all about?"

"Dude, I thought we could go out and have a quick celebration but it seems like we won't have time. I really need to get back to the hotel and sleep so I'll be ready for that long ass drive tomorrow."

"Owen I didn't really feel like going out tonight anyway. I don't need to make it a habit ya know?"

"Yeah whatever man. Listen, I'm about to bounce. You need a lift or are you going to shower here?"

"Naa I'm good. I'm about to go and grab my things then I'm leaving too. Get some sleep Owen cause I know how you and Davey are."

"Yeah yeah," he grinned. With one last wave to his brother, Owen left the arena. Bret shook his head wondering if sending Owen on his own was the best idea especially since Owen had a habit of being childish. _Maybe he'll behave himself tonight…_

Bret finally entered the locker room a second later to get his things. As he entered the room, he immediately spotted a familiar blonde straddling one of the long benches with his head hanging low. He was fully dressed and his hair was still wet from having showered which immediately struck Bret as odd. _Shawn and Marty's match was almost an hour ago so why is he still here? _Normally Bret chose to ignore people in the locker rooms unless it was close friends or family because it just wasn't his style to gossip or get in everyone's business. He always respected their privacy and he expected others to do the same for him. However, as much as he wanted to ignore the blonde, curiosity got the best of him and he found himself walking towards him. Bret straddled the bench a few inches in front of him hoping to get his attention but Shawn remained as he was, still staring down into nothingness. Bret frowned.

"Hey…Shawn?" The blonde didn't respond, at least not the way Bret expected him to. He heard a choke and then Shawn's hands moved to cover his face. _Oh my God…he's crying… _"Shawn? What's…?" Shawn continued to sob with his hands covering his face. Bret was pretty sure that Shawn covered his face to hide the possible embarrassment but that only made Bret even more curious. He reached up and clasped Shawn's wrists slowly bringing his hands down. Again. For the second time in his life he noticed some things about a guy. The eyes. Shawn's beautiful blue eyes stared back at him only this time they weren't filled with that sparkle he'd noticed during their first encounter. Instead they were clouded by precipitation and highlighted by redness. Shawn was the first to look away and soon an awkward silence filled the room.

For several long minutes neither man spoke a word. For Bret, it was an uncomfortable awkwardness that he'd never felt before with anyone in his life but at the same time it felt right. Even as he stared at his hands – well aware that they were still wrapped around Shawn's wrists – he still couldn't bring himself to do anything about how his fingers seemed to move on their own. They were gently caressing the back of Shawn's wrists against Bret's will. Bret found himself wondering if Shawn was going to say anything about it but he didn't.

"Thank you," he said quietly. Bret looked up in time to meet Shawn's gaze. He forced a smile as he stood to leave. Bret's fingers slowly released his wrists and it was then that Bret felt an overwhelming desire to make him stay.

"Are you okay?" he blurted out. He stood up as well watching as Shawn collected the rest of his things. As Shawn headed for the door, he managed another smile.

"I will be. Good night Bret."

When Shawn left the room, Bret released a breath that he'd been holding for quite sometime. For a minute he just stood there trying to make sense of what just happened. Shawn had been crying for reasons unknown to him and Bret had every intention of getting information out of him but he got nothing. Instead, he found himself in an awkward situation for reasons he didn't quite understand. All he could think about was the once striking blue eyes suddenly turned red with despair and the subconscious caressing of his soft wrists. _Soft? They were soft?_ Bret shook the thought immediately. He quickly gathered his things and left the arena vowing to forget the evening in its entirety.

***~*~***

"I never imagined the little prick would get to me," Bret grumbled. "I got back to the hotel and all I could think about was him and how sad he looked. It bothered me so much that I ended up checking out of the hotel earlier than planned just to get on the road. I needed to clear my head."

"Well I'm sorry that I got under your skin," Shawn answered. "But if it makes you feel any better you got to me too."

"In what way?" Chris asked. Shawn glanced down at his wrists remembering how Bret calmed his nerves with just his touch. It was an unexpected warmness that stayed with him even in his sleep that night. He sighed.

"The…it was the way he…I guess it was a combination of things. A couple of people came in and out of the room after it happened but Bret was the only one who cared enough to talk with me. I know I didn't say much but just his presence alone was enough to get me through the night."

"And Bret?" Chris inquired. "What exactly made those few moments stick with you?" There was a long pause as Bret searched his mind for the right answer. There were still some things about that night that he didn't quite understand but the one thing he did know was that Shawn's eyes did a number on him. He took a deep breath then finally answered.

"The eyes. It was the sadness in his eyes." The room was suddenly overcome with an awkward silence. Chris shifted nervously in his seat before managing to find his voice again.

"So after that night, how did it affect your relationship?"

"I don't think it did much of anything," Shawn said with shrug.

"Maybe for you," Bret muttered.

"Well you still ignored Marty and me so—

"Actually I didn't ignore the two of you. Unbeknownst to you, I was talking with Marty a lot of nights after your matches. He never said anything to you because he didn't want you to think I was trying to manipulate him or something."

"You may have talked with Marty but you completely ignored me," Shawn grumbled. Bret glanced over at the divider and scoffed.

"I'm going to just flat out tell you that the reason I did my best to ignore you was because I was having a hard time _NOT_ noticing you. To you it might have seemed like I was ignoring you but the truth is, I've always noticed you and it bothered me."

"Well I'm sorry that I'm the cause of big bad Hitman realizing his true colors," Shawn snapped.

"Whoa. Hold on a second," he stammered. "I'm not saying I was gay."

"Right," he sang sarcastically. "You were just 'noticing' me for the hell of it."

"FUCK SHAWN I DON'T KNOW WHY I WAS NOTICING YOU ALRIGHT!" he screamed. "I JUST WAS AND TO THIS DAY I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT!"

"Alright, alright. Calm down Bret," Chris soothed. "Let's…let's move on for a second. Okay. How about this? If you Bret ignored Shawn all the time, how exactly did you manage to befriend him? And what become of your friendship with Marty?"

Bret shrugged.

"Marty and I talked occasionally after matches, mostly because I was intrigued by him and Shawn's style in the ring. He told me a few things and asked for advice about certain techniques. Sometimes though the conversation would sway and we'd end up talking about growing up and whatnot. But…" Bret frowned. "I do remember this one night where Marty talked about Shawn. This was maybe a month or two after I found Shawn crying in the locker room. I could tell that his relationship with Shawn was changing. It was during their single's feud and it seemed like they were…I don't know. Disconnected somehow."

"What do you mean?" Chris asked. Bret glanced over at the divider, his eyes straining to make out what Shawn was doing but it was in vain. Chris waited for Shawn to react to Bret's words but he didn't. Instead he just sat there caressing the back of his hand as if trying to calm himself. Bret's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"They seemed to be spending a lot less time together. I…" Bret chuckled. "Now that I think about it, I don't know why I didn't put two and two together but like I said, I was never one for getting in anyone else's business. But I noticed that Shawn spent more time after matches talking with Kenneth than he did his former partner. I rarely saw the two of them leave together. Of course I heard the rumors and apart of me tried my best to ignore them but Shawn and Marty…they just seemed to give off that gay vibe so you couldn't be 100 percent sure that the rumors weren't true."

"So because I have long blonde hair and blue eyes, that automatically makes me gay?" Shawn snapped.

"That's not what I meant Shawn," Bret answered. "It's just…you two were always so…touchy feely. I saw you kiss him several times—

"On the lips?"

"No, but—

"Alright then. I rest my case."

"But Shawn even if it was a kiss on the forehead that was still…you know in our profession—

"And I could care less. Chris I'm leaving."

"Wha…wait Shawn. Don't you want to hear—

"I've heard enough," Shawn answered.

"Shawn don't do this," Bret said calmly. "You haven't even heard what I have to say about the night Marty left."

"If it's anything like your reaction to the night you found me crying then I really should leave now. I have my own feelings about that night but I fear we were on two different wavelengths."

"How did you feel that night?"

"Like I'd tell you," Shawn scoffed. "I'm not giving you anymore ammo to use for your 'Rainbow Shawn' argument."

"I'm not fishing for ammo Shawn. I'd just like to know how you felt," he answered. Shawn was now on his feet staring towards the divider with a frown on his face. _Could it be that Bret's actually trying to be sincere? _Shawn shook his head. There was just no way Bret was actually going to sit through the rest of this pointless interview without trying to make Shawn out to be the demon of his demise.

"I'm sorry but no. I just can't do that Bret. Besides, it doesn't matter. You said it yourself earlier that you could never admit to ever feeling anything for someone like me so I'm not going to give you a reason to blame me for…whatever it was we had at one time. Good day Bret."

"Shawn please…don't," Bret replied softly. "I'm…really trying to get things off my chest. You told me to make it worth your while and if you stay here for just a few more minutes, I'm sure you'll get exactly what you want." _Besides, I can't keep this shit to myself any longer… _

"And what is it that I want Bret?"

"A confession maybe?"

"_Wrong!_ I just want you to be honest."

"Shawn please…Just wait a second," he begged. "Here me out. I promise you what I say will be the truth and nothing less."

A few awkward seconds passed before Shawn took his seat again. Chris gave Bret the nod signaling for him to continue. Bret looked up at the ceiling then his eyes closed as he searched the very back of his mind to recall one of the most important nights in his life. He would never admit this to anyone else, not even to himself…that is until today. Until right now. He let out a deep breath then his mouth sort of moved on it's on like an obedient servant against its will.

"I was with my brother and Davey," he said softly. "We watched the match…"

***~*~***

"Bret, are we watching the match between the two former partners?" Owen asked. Bret finished lacing up his boots before standing to his feet. Owen and Davey were standing there with big eager grins on their faces.

"Sure. Why not? Besides I'm sure it will be one for the books."

"Yeah considering how I heard it's because they're breaking up – and literally," Davey joked.

"Guys come on now. Enough with the gossip."

"Oh shut it Bret," Owen replied. "You're just clueless because you're always talking to the little bugger Marty. I've seen the two of you."

"Yeah but we hardly talk of his personal life Owen. He mostly gets wrestling advice from me and even then it's not much."

"You any idea how that looks?" Owen asked incredulously. "People will start to think you're after him."

"Oh come on!" Bret scoffed. "You gotta be shittin me!"

"Yeah well I know it sounds farfetched but it could happen to the best of us even you big bro. Plus…" He lowered his voice as they walked towards the back where the monitors were. "You…Sometimes I see you watching Shawn when you think no one's looking." Bret bit his lower lip to hide his shock. Just how much attention was he really paying to that blonde lately? Owen's grin jarred his thoughts.

"What are you talking about?" Bret managed.

"Oh well…I know you're probably just concerned for those guys but seriously, if you don't watch yourself people are gonna start to think things. Everyone's pretty sure Marty's queer and Shawn's not exactly hiding the fact that he could be too. I mean look at him. How many straight guys do you know would go out there night after night dancing and swaying his hips in the ring? Huh? Tell me."

"Uh…"

"My point exactly. Look, I'm just saying. Don't worry about him so much. He's going to make you crazy before it's over. He's much, much too pretty for his own good. And…" Owen looked over at Davey who was a fair distance behind them. He lowered his voice even more. "Between us, I think he's pretty too. Like…if I was gay pretty I'd date him." Bret shrugged his brother off giving him a playful nudge.

"Have you…been drinking?" he laughed. Owen frowned.

"No."

"Then don't talk like that. Now shush. The match is about to start."

The guys watched the match from the monitors in the back, all of them very impressed with how exciting the match was. Shawn and Marty had a few heated exchanges that ended in stalemates which got mass approval from the crowd.

"Man Bret. I'm wondering if anyone will even have an upper hand in the match. They're too evenly matched," David commented. They watched as Marty slammed Shawn onto the mat only to watch him nip up and hit him with a dropkick to the chest.

"I think it's gonna come down to whoever has the better stamina," Bret added never taking his eyes off the screen. At this point, both Marty and Shawn were exchanging rights in the middle of the ring, the crowd now on its feet out of excitement. Marty's mistake came when he allowed himself to be flung into the ropes. He never even had a chance to think about dodging it.

"Ooooo….That's gotta hurt," Owen winced. Shawn landed a superkick to Marty's face then came the cover for the three count. It was over. Shawn had won but instead of celebrating he immediately left the ring after his hand was raised in victory. Bret frowned at the monitor as he watched the blonde coming up the ramp. _That's strange…He just kicked ass out there. Why does he look so…upset? _Bret was nudged in his side broken from his thoughts. He looked over to see Owen shaking his head.

"What?" Bret asked.

"That look…I know what you are wondering but let it go bro. He's just a weird kid. Besides, it's not like you to be so curious anyway. Why start now?" Bret shrugged.

"I don't know. I guess it's cuz I've taken a liking to the kid."

"Which one?" David asked grinning. Bret rolled his eyes.

"You know I mean Marty. You two have seen me talking with him after matches several times."

"Oh well…" Owen grinned.

"Whatever. Let's get out of here. We got matches coming up." Bret ushered the guys out of the room though in the back of his mind he was already making plans to hunt Marty down later. Owen and Davey had a tag match next that was followed by the main event featuring Bret and Kurt Henning again. After the match, Bret headed backstage to hunt down Marty. When he got behind the curtain, Davey and Owen were both standing there waiting for him.

"No excuses tonight Bret. Let's go out," Davey ordered. Bret placed his hands on his hips shaking his head.

"Guys. Seriously?"

"Come on Bret! Live a little. You haven't gone out with us in almost three weeks," Owen complained.

"If I go out with you guys tonight will you piss off from now on?"

"Well…"

"I'm serious Owen. I can't be going out so much. You know it's not my scene man."

"Fine," Owen pouted.

"Alright. Well give me time to shower."

"Oooo…just meet us at the bar. Twenty minutes bro. Don't take too long with your girly habits," Owen grinned before he and Davey hurried off. Bret shook his head entering the locker room. Once again the place looked very deserted except for the sound of running water. Bret quickly rid himself of his wrestling gear, grabbed a towel, then headed for the showers. Bret was never a guy to really care who he showered with. It was just something that came with being an athlete. You would never have the opportunity to shower alone much anyway so why let it bother you? That was all about to change.

When Bret entered the shower area, he stopped dead in his tracks when he realized who it was showering. At the far end standing underneath the last shower area was a familiar blonde who had been plaguing his mind for several weeks. His eyes were closed as he allowed the water to drown his face. Bret watched as his hands moved to comb through his curly locks and it was that moment Bret realized he was staring. He was going to look away but then he heard something that sounded like a choke or a cough. He waited and watched only to realize that Shawn was crying again. The blonde leaned his head against the tile and just sobbed. Bret cursed under his breath. It was so unlike him to care. It was so unlike him to stare at other men. It was also so unlike him to let other people's feelings bother him, but once again he could not help himself.

He wrapped the towel around his waist and quietly approached him. Bret stood a few feet away from him waiting to see if he would look up, but he didn't. Bret hesitated for a moment but it was too late to turn away now. He reached out and touched Shawn's shoulder startling him. He quickly turned to face Bret his face paler than ever. Their eyes locked, mouths opened to speak but neither man could make a sound. Bret's eyes suddenly drifted from Shawn's blue eyes to his chest where he became hypnotized by the rise and fall of it as he breathed. _What am I doing? Why am I staring?_ Locking eyes with Shawn again he somehow managed to speak.

"You were crying just now." Shawn folded his arms across his chest and stared at his feet.

"It doesn't matter. The one person who would have cared is now gone so I'll have to get over it sooner or later."

"You mean Marty?" Shawn nodded. "So he's gone…like gone for good?" Shawn wiped his eyes.

"Yeah uh…tonight was his last match."

"Wow. I thought for sure…but he's a great wrestler. I don't understand…"

"He left because of me."

"Oh." Bret was at a lost for words. He wasn't expecting that one even though he did hear the rumors.

"You don't have to stay here like last time," he said softly. "I'll be fine."

"You don't look fine," he blurted out. He hadn't meant to say it out loud but it sort of happened. He spoke before he could think straight; the second time something like this has happened and with a guy no less.

"Just go Bret. I'm sure you have somewhere you need to be." It was true. Bret did have somewhere he needed to be but instead he was only making his brother's argument more concrete. But he didn't care. At least not at the moment. Even if he wanted to leave his feet felt like they were glued to the floor and wouldn't allow him to move anyway. Just like last time. He sighed.

"Why do you think it's your fault Marty left?" Shawn looked up at him irritably.

"Just…go!" he snapped.

"But I really wanna help you. I'm not just trying to be nosy Shawn. It's not my style. It's just…you two have so much potential and I'd hate to see it wasted because of something stupid."

"It doesn't matter. He's gone and there's nothing I can do about it."

"Well can I help? Is there something I can do? Do you want me to talk with him?" Shawn stared at him for a few seconds then cut his eyes to the floor again.

"I doubt it would have done any good but…it's too late. He's already gone and he's never coming back," he choked. Bret watched him cover his face with his hands again as he cried. All of a sudden, a funny feeling came over Bret that he couldn't quite explain. He didn't think about his actions until sometime after he did them. His hands found Shawn's wrists again, clasping them tightly. Instead of pulling his hands down like last time, he did the unthinkable by pulling him into his chest. One of Bret's arms slowly went around Shawn's back while the other went behind his head.

"It's…going to be alright," he whispered. Then he just held him as he cried. As Bret continued to hold him, he suddenly became aware of how warm Shawn's body felt up against his. Soon Bret's fingers were twirling strands of his silky hair and teasing the spine of his back. Bret's next instinct led him to breath in the smell of Shawn's hair sending his senses into overdrive. From there his nose led him to the side of Shawn's neck where he watched his pulse tempt his resolve. Bret bit his lip. It was the only thing keeping him from throwing reason out the window in order to satisfy his dying curiosity. Shawn pulled away from him bringing him back to reality. Bret looked down at him nervously waiting for him to say something but he didn't. Instead he smiled weakly before brushing past him to leave the shower. Bret didn't even turn to watch him leave for he was afraid. Of what? Well, he couldn't be certain. The only thing he was certain of was that he'd crossed that fine line between curious and dangerously curious which made him think of Owen…

"Shit Owen!" Bret took the quickest shower in the history of showers then headed off to meet Owen. He was already ten minutes late but he hoped Owen wouldn't ask why. He wasn't in the mood for the teasing tonight especially since he still wasn't quite over what just happened.

* * *

AN: We'll pick up with the rest of Bret's night in the next chapter. Thanks to all of you who have been reviewing. CookingKiller, Esha Napoleon, shinigami sakura2000, Animal Luvr 4 Life,Cenalova-54-8284, Seraphalexiel, dream0fmirrors, AnonymousPunk, takers dark lover. You guys are amazing!


	8. Session 5 'Thank You Bret'

"Dude you killing me!" Owen exclaimed. Bret slid in the booth next to Davey. He flashed Owen an apologetic smile even though he knew it was probably in vain.

"I'm sorry bro. I lost track of time."

"Yeah I bet," Owen grumbled. "So drink up. I figured you'd take your sweet ass time getting here so I ordered you a beer."

"Thanks." Bret took a sip of the ice cold beer doing his best to ignore his brother's knowing gaze but it was damn near impossible. After several seconds of undergoing his scrutiny Bret finally chose to indulge him. "What? Spill it Owen. I know you wanna ask so just do it."

"Alright," he grinned. "Why were you late? And none of this 'I lost track of time' bullshit. You got caught up."

"Maybe."

"With who?" Davey asked.

"No one important," he replied. He hoped that the finality of his tone would give them the hint but not Owen. He quirked his brow.

"I see."

"You don't believe me and that's fine but I don't care. I don't have to indulge you." Owen and Davey both laughed.

"Chill out bro. I wasn't meaning anything by it. It's just…it's not like you to be so…Davey help me out here."

"Concerned," Davey answered.

"Yeah that's it. Concerned. So who are you concerned about?" Owen asked.

"Look Owen, I'm not concerned—

"Bret please," Owen smirked. "I saw you when you walked in and judging by the look on your face I'd say something had you worried. So just spill it already otherwise—

"Fine! If you must know I got caught up talking with Shawn."

"Shawn?" Owen asked. "You mean the kid?"

"Yes the kid," he snapped irritably. Both Owen and Davey frowned.

"So uh…what's his deal?" Davey asked.

"Nothing. He was just…upset about something."

"Marty right?"

"Yeah. He…said tonight was his last match."

"Really? Dude I didn't…But I thought…"

"Yeah well I didn't know either and Shawn's pretty upset about it too."

"Well I mean…I'd be pretty upset too if my lover left me like that," Owen commented. Bret almost blurted out that he didn't think they were lovers but he caught himself. Who was he to decide whether or not they were lovers? Besides it wasn't really his business and so what if they were lovers? Images from earlier suddenly flashed through Bret's mind. He bit his lip as he recalled the way Shawn's hair smelled and how it felt holding him in his arms. _It felt too natural…_

"Hello? Bret? Is anybody home?" Bret jumped.

"Huh? What?" Davey and Owen cast each other concerned looks. "Oh come on guys. What was _that_ look for?" Owen just shook his head.

"Go to the hotel and get some rest," he urged. "You look tired and whatever's on your mind, it's got you pretty spaced out."

"But I thought you guys wanted to hang out and drink?" Owen and Davey just shook their heads grinning.

"You were late and I'm already on my fourth drink. Davey's gotta drive us back and you look too tired to even make it to a fourth round. Go. Get some rest. We'll do the heavy drinking when you're champ."

"Oh…well…alright then. Are you sure?"

"Yes now go! I hope to never see you this distraught about something again. At least not until after you've won the big one," Owen grinned. Bret shook his head as he stood to his feet.

"Night guys. I'll give you a call in the morning to make sure you're okay."

Bret left his brother and cousin feeling slightly guilty but relieved at the same time. While he really did feel bad about abandoning them, he knew he would probably get in trouble if he didn't leave. Already his brother Owen picked up on his mood. He wasn't in a bad mood but it was pretty obvious that he wasn't himself. His brother knew he wasn't one for worrying about others so for him to be so worried about Shawn was just out of character. When Bret finally made it to his room, he kicked off his shoes and pants collapsing on the cool linen. He was tired yet try as he might he could not fall right asleep. The image of Shawn in his arms – and a naked Shawn at that – kept popping in his head despite his best efforts to block it. Plus, he could almost still feel him in his arms. _What the hell is up with me?_ Bret tossed and turned for several hours until he wore himself out. It was only then he was able to finally fall asleep.

***~*~***

"I uh…slept for a few hours that night but I wouldn't call it a sound sleep. Even in my dreams I saw his pathetic face though at the time I said pathetic to keep myself in check. I uh…I thought that if I called him pathetic it would make it easier to accept that I was concerned about a guy."

"So after that night, did things change for you?" Chris asked. "Did you finally stop thinking about Shawn?" Bret shook his head.

"No. It uh…it actually got worse. I guess you could say that I found myself curious—

"More than curious," Shawn added. Bret rolled his eyes.

"Yeah later on I was more than curious but at the time, I was just curious. Before Shawn and Marty, I mostly kept to myself. I socialized with Hart Foundation members only and occasionally Pat Paterson or people like that. I just didn't feel the need to have any other friends. Friends only complicate things which I later found out."

"They complicate things?" Chris asked. "In what way?"

"Just…I don't really know how to explain it," he grumbled.

"I'll help him," Shawn piped up. "What he means is that friendships emitting strong, unexplainable chemistry can lead to unwanted feelings that can ruin you forever."

"Well…I guess you're right," Bret shrugged. "They really were unwanted feelings."

"Feeling's mutual," Shawn grumbled.

"Okay then. Well…before we move on," Chris continued. "Shawn, can I get you to comment on the story Bret just told us? And can you maybe respond telling us a little bit about the rest of your night? I know you told us that you eventually got used to Kenneth's actions but that night…you had to have been feeling kinda down."

"My emotions were all over the place, moreso than Bret's anyway."

"How you figure?" Bret asked.

"Unlike me Bret, you weren't raped by a guy. When all your life you've been attracted to one sex, being raped complicates things. It makes you question yourself as a person. That's something I've struggled with for a long time, even marrying when my heart wasn't in it. I made myself believe that I was in love with her and I think I was but for the most part, my heart wasn't in it. I loved someone else. She knew it. We both knew it which is why I don't have any regrets about my failed marriage. We're still really good friends to this day, but it took me years to find myself. Falling for you didn't help matters either."

"Hn. You _fell_ for me?" he scoffed. "You could have fooled me." Shawn just continued on ignoring Bret's words.

"To answer your question Chris, I'd have to say that it feels good to know that I wasn't the only one on edge after that incident. That night, I was also very aware of Bret, more than I should have been too. I knew that he was holding me in his arms, sheltering me from my demons but at the same time, I knew it was wrong. Well…wrong in the sense that it wasn't socially accepted at the time. I also knew that he was probably uncomfortable though he did a pretty good job of hiding it. That's why I pulled away. That's why I left."

"You left because you thought I was uncomfortable?" He scoffed. "That makes no sense unless you can read minds. I held you like it was the most natural thing in the world and you know it."

"But I could still sense…never mind. Forget it."

"No I wanna know. Why did you leave?" he pushed.

"WHY DOES IT MATTER?" he snapped irritably.

"BECAUSE I REALLY WANNA KNOW!" he shouted. "TELL ME HOW YOU FELT! I JUST SPILLED MY GUTS…SHARING A PRIVATE MOMENT…MY PRIVATE THOUGHTS WITH THE ENTIRE WORLD SO DAMMIT THE LEAST YOU CAN DO FOR ME IS TELL ME HOW YOU FELT! THIS WAS SOMETHING THAT I NEVER WOULD HAVE ADMITTED IN A MILLION YEARS SO DAMMIT TELL ME SHAWN! TELL ME HOW YOU FELT!" he demanded.

"FINE! YOU REALLY WANNA KNOW BRET?!"

"YES! I WANT TO KNOW!"

"THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD HAVE _SATISFIED_ YOUR DYING CURIOSITY BECAUSE IF YOU WOULD HAVE KISSED ME THAT NIGHT, I'D HAVE GLADLY WELCOMED IT! THERE! YOU HAPPY NOW?" he breathed. The room became eerily silent except for the heavy breathing of an angry blonde. Bret cut his eyes towards the divider, his heart beating rapidly.

"You…would have let me kiss you?" he managed.

"Yes!" he snapped. "I…I imagined you kissing my lips and before my brain could play anymore tricks on me, I pushed you away and I left. I left because I didn't understand what was happening with me. Like I said before, it took me _years_ to find myself but you…you only seemed to complicate things."

"By being a friend I complicated things?" he frowned.

"You said the same thing about me so how does it make me wrong and you right?"

"That's not what I meant."

"Then don't. Please…drop it."

"Fine."

"Anyway Chris," Shawn continued. "I could tell you everything that was going through my head but it was so much. Just…a jumbled up mess and it wasn't until Bret was holding me in his arms that I felt at ease." Shawn glanced over at the divider and sighed. "Bret and I…while we…no. Wait. I better not try and speak for him so I'll just say this. After that night, I felt strangely connected to him somehow. Even after I left and went back to the hotel, I laid in bed and thought of nothing but Bret. I could remember his eyes and how they showed genuine concern. It meant a lot to me."

"Wow. So…so no hard feelings about that night?" Chris asked. Shawn shook his head.

"Nope. In fact, if it wasn't for him I probably would have gotten drunk and killed myself. It was just that bad. But uh…the next Monday night I made it my business to find him and thank him. I felt like I needed to and I'm glad I did…or at least at the time I was glad…"

**~*~*~**

Shawn's match was near the opening of Raw. He wrestled a guy named Max Moon practically destroying him then left the ring with Sherri. Since Marty was no more, some of the elders thought that Sherri would be good for him, but Shawn knew better. While he was open to the idea of getting famous quick, he knew the real reason for Sherri's companionship was just that – companionship. Now that Marty was gone, it was no secret to Vince that he was completely alone so he was sure Sherri was put in the equation to help him get over Marty. But whatever. Sherri was a beautiful woman who loved wrestling so he was sure they'd get along just fine. She offered to drive him back to the hotel but Shawn politely declined. He had something important he needed to do but it would have to wait until the end of the night. Shawn grabbed a quick shower, changed clothes and then headed to the break room to wait.

Since Bret was in the main event again, Shawn had to wait almost two hours before getting a chance to speak with him. Even after the show was over, he still had to wait a while. He wanted to speak with Bret alone so that he could avoid any unwanted confrontations especially since Kenneth was still stuck on him. Plus, he wasn't sure how Bret would feel about him in public. Not that he thought Bret was shallow but…he didn't know Bret well enough to know this so he decided to play it safe.

People came and went throughout the evening. It was when he spotted Owen and Davey leaving the arena that he thought it was finally safe to look for Bret. Shawn started in the locker rooms only to find Bret's stuff was already gone. _Damn. I missed him._ Feeling slightly bummed Shawn left the locker room and headed out the back of the arena.

"Hey kid." Shawn jumped, quickly spinning around to see Bret leaning against the wall near the exit. He smiled. "You okay?"

"Yeah. I was just…looking for you," he managed.

"I thought so. I thought maybe you'd find me after my match but when you didn't show I figured you'd already left. Saw your car was still here so I figured I'd wait up."

"Oh…well…" Shawn noticed something about Bret that he didn't notice in all the two years they'd been working together. Bret…was handsome. He was wearing some dark blue jeans and a white tank; the tank clung to him revealing nice, hard abs that Shawn only wish he had. His dark hair complimented his darker skin tone and his eyes… _Damn. What am I doing here? He's a fucking guy for Christ's sake! _Shawn looked down nervously cursing himself inwardly for having such thoughts and feeling this way but he couldn't help it. It was as if he'd gone mute all of a sudden. He opened his mouth and tried to apologize again but he wasn't even sure how to begin. Bret must have sensed his feelings because he ended up saying everything Shawn wanted to say for him.

"Don't worry about last week. It's cool." Shawn looked up, his face turning hotter by the second.

"I'm sorry," he managed.

"Don't worry about it. You were upset," he shrugged.

"Yeah but still. I wanted to thank you for…" Bret reached out and squeezed his shoulder reminding him of the warmth from last week all over again. Shawn suppressed an unwanted shudder from going through him.

"You're welcome." An awkward silence ensued, mainly because Shawn wanted to talk but wasn't quite sure what to say. Once again, Bret came to his rescue. "So…you and Sherri now huh?" Shawn forced a smile.

"Yeah uh…Vince seems to think it'll be good for my character. _The Heartbreak Kid_," scoffed.

"Well…I think it could work," he grinned. "I mean seriously. You'd have to be pretty stuck on yourself to pull your character off anyway – and confident," he added. Shawn chuckled a little running his hand nervously through his long hair.

"Yeah but…I'm not all that confident."

"Oh come on!" Bret laughed. "Are you kidding me? Look at you. You got the best of both worlds. Looks _and_ skill. What woman wouldn't want that?"

"I…don't know about that," he laughed.

"Oh a laugh," Bret grinned. "I have done my job for the night." Shawn blinked a few times staring at him incredulously. Bret's grin just got wider as he explained. "You haven't smiled all evening except when you did your piece in the ring with Sherri. When I saw you exit the building I decided to make it my business to cheer you up or at least make you smile." Shawn was so taken back and touched that he almost threw his arms around him but he didn't. He reminded himself that men didn't act like that and instead opted for a genuine smile.

"You did both and I'm glad." Shawn glanced down at his watch and saw that it was getting late. "Uh…well I guess I should be going now."

"Yeah. Me too."

"So uh…"

"See you next week? And you'll be smiling right?" Shawn grinned.

"I'll try. Good night Bret."

"Good night Shawn."

**~*~*~**

"I went back to my lonely hotel room and cried myself to sleep." Shawn's voice was cracking as he recalled the memory, but little did he know, Bret was fighting back tears as well but unlike Shawn, Bret had no earthly idea why he was feeling so emotional. Chris decided that this was the perfect time to take a break. They'd already been filming for two hours so a lunch break was desperately needed. Chris rose to his feet.

"Gentlemen, we're going to take a short lunch break. Meet me back here in an hour and we'll pick up from here." Both men nodded as Chris left the room. Funny thing is that neither one of them wanted to move just yet. Or rather, they did but just wasn't sure what to say to the other not to mention both were hesitant to see each other's faces. After several long seconds of debating, Shawn finally rose to his feet.

"I'm going now. Should we discuss a time for my return so we can avoid seeing each other?"

"That won't be necessary Shawn. I'm not _that_ bad."

"Tell it to the people who made me leave the Hall of Fame Ceremony an hour early."

"I didn't feel like listening to the 'You Screwed Bret' chants."

"Never bothered you before."

"Whatever. Just…go get you something to eat," he snapped. "I'm not hungry."

Shawn quickly left the room without another word leaving Bret all alone to his thoughts. A part of him hated to leave Bret like this but it wasn't enough to make him stay. Two hours he'd been stuck in that tense environment and all he wanted now was to get back to the hotel room so he could breathe again. His current love interest was waiting for him there and right now, he needed to see him or else he might not make it through the rest of the interview.

* * *

_AN: This will be the last update for a while and I hope it turned out well. Anyway, it could be a week. It could be two weeks. I am graduating in a couple of days and with finals coming up, I won't have time to update. So I hope you enjoyed this and I plan to continue it when I get the chance. In the meantime, read some JBL/Shawn stories. A friend of mine has a series of OSTs that are really good so check them out. She does such good work yet has very few reviews. __**vadg** is the name so look her up. And if you check out **'Adnacia'** and **'Nefatiri'** between the two of us, we have some good reads favorited and/or written. Also, for the love of God I need more ShawnCena stories to read otherwise I'm going to explode. I need more. They are the fuel that feeds my slash muses so write me some or force good writers to write me some or else I'm going to cry. Seriously. It's that bad. I'm having withdrawls. ShawnCena or ShawnJBL. Either will do:D_


	9. A Little Comfort

Shawn hurried inside the hotel room to find his companion sitting on the bed surrounded by paperwork. John looked up when he heard the door slam and flashed him a warm smile.

"Hey kitten. Back so…what's wrong?" His smile immediately faded when he saw the look on Shawn's face. His eyes were slightly glazed as if he had been crying and he did not look happy at all.

"I'm fine," he lied.

"Yeah right. Come over here." John moved his paperwork to the shelf next to him motioning for Shawn to lay next to him. Shawn was only too eager. He was drained from the first part of the interview both physically and mentally, but that was to be expected. He crawled on the bed next to John and curled into him. John kissed the top of his head. "I take it he's not being reasonable." Shawn groaned burying his face in John's side.

"Words can't even describe how much of a pain in the ass he's being." His muffled complaint made the Texan laugh.

"Oh come on Shawn. Are you sure you're being fair? You know you aren't the most reasonable person either." Shawn lifted his head poking out his lips in a pout.

"What are you talking about? I'm always reasonable!"

"Oh, yeah. _Sure_ you are," John sang. "That's how we ended up moving in together right? Because I told you no but you insisted—

"Alright, alright," he grumbled. "Maybe I _can_ be a little stubborn but I swear I was actually trying ya know?" Shawn rolled over on top of John settling himself between the Texan's legs. John wrapped his arms around Shawn's back holding him in place while Shawn buried his face in John's neck. He took a deep breath breathing in the only scent that could comfort him.

"Oh kitten, it's going to be alright. If it's really that bad why don't you call it off? I'm sure Chris will understand."

"But I can't," he mumbled. "If I run now then I may never get another chance to tell my side of the story. I'm tired of all his Canadian fans worshipping him like he's some kind of God. I wonder how they would feel if they knew we were lovers once…how they'd react if they knew Canada's hero was actually sleeping with Canada's number one public enemy?"

"You're actually planning to ruin him like that?"

"No. I never wanted to bring any of that up but he…he backed me into a corner…started hammering away at me and somehow it all sort of come out. Believe me, I never wanted any of our personal lives revealed but he pretty much brought it on himself. I was going to leave at one point but then he confessed to Chris that we were lovers. It's too late now."

"Why'd he do that? That doesn't sound like something Bret would do especially considering just last year he told Canadian cameras that he's always despised you."

"I don't know," Shawn sighed. "I just don't know. It's weird…being in the room with him. I'd be lying to you if I told you that I didn't feel something being near him," he confessed. John only chuckled.

"It's quite alright kitten. I didn't expect you to go into this interview and not come back feeling conflicted. He was your first love and I know he can never be replaced." Shawn raised his head looking intensely into the eyes of his lover.

"John, no matter what happens today between me and Bret I want you to know that it's not enough to make me leave you. We've had this discussion before."

"You say that now kitten but…" he sighed. "I wanted you to do the interview so that you can get your side out but I also pushed you into it so that you can see him again. Maybe heal some old wounds and figure out where your heart truly lies." Shawn shook his head angrily.

"Don't," he growled. "Don't even…think that way. I don't love Bret like that anymore. You forget he ruined my life. He _left_ me John and never once looked back. I cannot and will not forget that. Sure I forgave him a long time ago and yeah, maybe I do still have deep feelings for him but I will _not_ go back to him. That hold he had on me is long gone." John opened his mouth to protest but Shawn stopped him with a kiss. John gave up the fight and just gave into the familiar taste he loved more than anything in the world. Shawn pulled away when they both gave out of breath and buried his face in John's neck again. John decided to let it go. After all, Shawn pretty much ended the conversation with his kiss so it was best not to push the subject any further. John let his fingers entangle themselves in Shawn's locks to comfort him. Whether Shawn knew it or not, seeing Bret was for his own good. _He still has feelings for him but is in denial right now… I love you so much kitten but you need to heal your heart first. Only then can we truly get on with our lives…_

**--xx--**

Bret did not move from his chair at all during the lunch break. Instead he stayed rooted on the spot – not like he had much of a choice anyway. Since Shawn and Chris left it seemed like his legs had grown 100 pound weights that were weighing him down in his chair. Not that it mattered though. He really didn't want to move anyway because he was afraid of not coming back. If he left the building anytime today then there was no way in hell he'd ever come back. Maybe he was being a bit babyish but he didn't care. Too much of his past life was starting to resurface and it was things that he never wanted to recall. Well…so he said. Bret closed his eyes recalling the first time he held Shawn in his arms. That whole scene still seemed to play out like a movie in his head – and it was one hell of a movie too. It was so good that he could still smell Shawn's shampoo tickling his nostrils. The thought made Bret laugh. He hadn't recalled such memories in years. Even during the 100 plus Canadian interview he's done these past years, he still never once thought of Shawn in _that _way.

_So why am I thinking of him now?_ Bret was glad to have this alone time because he needed it. This interview was not going at all the way he thought it would go. He calculated before hand that Shawn would try to take a few cheap shots at him. No big deal he thought but he couldn't have been more wrong. Shawn wasn't at all what he expected him to be except for the few times Bret pushed but he did it out of anger more than anything else. So many years he'd been harboring that bitterness and when he heard Shawn's voice he just exploded on him. He hit him with accusation after accusation never expecting him to be so humble and rational. The Shawn he remembered (not counting the first few humble years) was very irrational and childish. He tended to throw temper tantrums when things didn't go his way but even now when he thought about it, that was something he secretly liked about him. _Whenever Shawn was temper mental, I was the one who calmed him down…For the first few years anyway._ Bret scoffed. Everything was fine between them until people started influencing Shawn. People like Hunter. Bret shook the thought. He had no desire to think about Hunter and he really wished he could stop thinking about Shawn but it was no use. Those images of holding him the shower just kept replaying over and over in his head making him extremely uncomfortable. _I need to get a grip!_

Bret glanced down at his watch and realized it was almost time for them to get back. It was going on 1 o'clock but neither Chris nor Shawn was back yet. Bret chuckled. Maybe they weren't coming back but who could blame them? Bret could tell that Chris was extremely uncomfortable throughout the interview though he got points for sticking it out. Bret knew if he would have been in Chris' place he might have given up after the first round. As for Shawn, well…it would be unexpected if he chose not to come back. He cracked at Shawn earlier in the interview for being a scared little boy who tended to run from his problems rather than face them but the truth is, he couldn't have been more wrong. Shawn was never one to back down from much of anything even if he was in the wrong. His bravery – if you call it that – tended to get him in trouble more so than helping him out. In a way Bret supposed he ought to be grateful for guys like Nash and Hunter because they _did_ tend to look out for him, even if they were bad influences.

Bret heard the door swing open on the other side then the soft footsteps came next. He looked up to see Chris taking his place back out in front. He looked less tense and ready for battle. He smiled at Bret.

"You alright champ?" Chris asked.

"Yeah. I'm good. Enjoy your lunch?"

"Yeah I did. Took a walk too," he laughed.

"I don't blame you. You look less stressed than before."

"Yeah well no offense to you or Shawn but…wow. You took a lot out of me. Sometimes I'm scared to even breathe."

"I wouldn't worry about breathing. I'm not in the mood to kill anyone and from the looks of it, this interview may not continue. If he doesn't show soon I suppose we can both go home." Even as Bret said the words, his heart seemed to sink even further. He would never admit it out loud but he wanted Shawn to come back. So much was already on the table so it really wouldn't hurt to finish the interview. Plus, he needed to hear more from Shawn. Just hearing his voice…He couldn't explain it but it was comforting in a way.

A few more minutes passed. Bret was about to tell Chris to call it a day when the door finally opened and closed again. Shawn walked in looking – in Chris's opinion – just as tense as before which kind of scared Chris. He half wondered if he should even try to continue. Shawn looked as if he could snap at any moment and quite frankly Chris did not want to get on his idol's bad side. He waited for a minute pretending to be looking for a specific note card when Bret broke the silence.

"How's the boyfriend?" Bret asked. Shawn glanced towards the divider with an eyebrow raised curiously.

"Not that you really care but he's fine. In fact, he had to make me come back here."

"Oh I see. You were planning on running away huh?"

"Yeah. Guess I was. For the first time in a long time I was ready to give up because I figured something out. It really doesn't matter what I do or say today. At the end of the day, we're still going to hate each other so why even bother ya know? But then John reminded me that I should at least do it for Chris since we are good friends. He also said I should do it just to prove to you that I've changed. The second argument won me over because Chris and I still have some old wounds to heal." Chris shifted nervously at this having been reminded of a very terrible incident that happened not too long ago. Bret looked over at the divider and chuckled.

"You and the kid huh? Wow. And I thought my eyes were deceiving me. The way the two of you look at each other sometimes it's enough to make me cringe."_ Cena! Of all the people he had to choose Cena…_

"If you're talking about Cena then you got the wrong John. Yes, it's true that Cena and I had feelings for each other but another John won my heart in the end. Actually I think I kind of forced him to take it but whatever. I love him. He loves me and that's all that matters."

"Another John?" Bret asked. _Who the hell else…?_ Shawn let out an exasperated sigh.

"If you must know Bret, it's actually Layfield."

"As in John _Bradshaw _Layfield? _The_ JBL? The rich, stockbroker jerk-face from hell JBL?" he asked incredulously.

"He's none of the above Bret, but you wouldn't know since you don't live with him. He's a great guy and treats me better than any of my old flames including you."

"You wish," Bret scoffed. "I never treated you bad."

"You never treated me good either."

"I did too!" Bret snapped.

"Only in private!"

"Well—

"At least when I'm with John I don't have to sneak around. That's why our relationship was doomed from the start. You were too afraid to admit that you were dating a guy."

"YOU KNOW WHY!" he yelled.

"BUT I LOVED YOU DAMMIT! I WANTED TO BE ABLE TO SHOW PEOPLE HOW MUCH I LOVED YOU BUT YOU WERE AFRAID!"

"OF COURSE I WAS! IT'S…IT WASN'T SOMETHING…You don't understand and I'm tired of yelling," he breathed. "Chris can we get a move on please?"

"Yes, please before I throw reason out the window and go back to my lover."

"Uh…alright. Um…" Chris flipped through his note cards racking his brain for a question. He finally decided to just go back to where they left off because right now, he wasn't sure if there was anything safe left. "Shawn we left off with you looking for Bret to thank him. It seemed to go well and last thing you said was that you went back to the hotel and cried yourself to sleep. Why is that?" Shawn took a deep breath before answering.

"I cried because I was alone. Even though Marty had been gone for a few days I still wasn't used to sleeping alone. I was hurt and going back to that lonely hotel room just tore me apart."

"I'm…I'm sorry to hear that," Chris answered.

"It's no big deal," Shawn shrugged. "I eventually got over it. Not completely, but like the old saying goes, 'time heals all wounds'."

"I think that person lied," Bret mumbled.

"So did Bret contribute to your healing process?" Chris asked. Shawn hesitated to answer because he wasn't quite ready to talk nice about Bret again especially since he just dissed his lover. But he promised himself that he'd tell the truth so after contemplating for a minute, he finally answered.

"Sure. He was a big part of my healing process and so was Sherri. Those two kept me from shooting myself in the head."

"When did you finally start to realize that you were getting over Marty?"

"It's kind of hard to pinpoint an exact time. I just know that after a while, I started thinking more of Sherri and Bret than I did my ex partner. I think this was due to the fact that Sherri was rooming with me a lot and Bret was talking with me – briefly – but it was enough to make me feel like I wasn't completely alone. Well…at first anyway," he added.

"What do you mean?"

"Well…by now you should know that I wasn't the most popular person in the locker room unless I was 'whoring' myself out as Bret put it."

"Well you were." Shawn just chuckled.

"I don't expect any of you to understand and I don't really care anymore if you believe me. I don't think I was a whore but the rest of the locker room seemed to think so. By the time Kenneth and AJ were done with me, my good reputation went out the window. Everyone knew I was good in the ring and they also just knew I was good in the sack. Soon everyone wanted a piece of me." He shook his head. "It was crazy."

"Wow. So you mean…there were others that…wanted to sleep with you?" Shawn let out a laugh.

"Oh boy. You'd be surprised. I could name people you just know are straight but I'm not. I never slept with any of those guys. The only guys I slept with were…well, a few in number."

"Define few," Bret mumbled. Shawn rolled his eyes.

"Few in my world might not equal few in yours Bret. I'm not going to lie. I've been through quite a few lovers in my lifetime but that was my way of dealing with my problems. A lot of times I was so drunk or high that I had no idea who I was going to bed with. It got to the point where I just didn't care anymore. I hated everything about myself but the fact that people loved my body kept me from going off the deep end…at least for a while anyway."

"So you just gave in to random people?"

"No, not random. Just…there were a few guys that really took an interest in me after Bret left and the fact that they lusted after me gave me some power over them. I used my body to my advantage. I guess you could say I would tease them, but it made me feel better about myself. Eventually though, I ended up in bed with a few of them. Some of them even fell for me but I wanted no lasting relationship. I just wanted…hell I don't know what I wanted to be honest."

"So basically you're saying that your self confidence was really low?"

"Yeah it was," Bret answered for him. "Even I noticed it. It was part of the reason why I called myself checking up on him."

"Looking at all the tapes of you from back then, you seemed far from being unsure of yourself. Even listening to your promos and seeing how you carried yourself; basically the complete opposite of what you're telling me."

"Well I—

"I got this," Bret said cutting him off. "I – and I can't believe I'm doing this – but I can vouch for him. You see, Owen had the same problem as Shawn. It's not hard going out to the ring playing a character. The character Shawn played on camera was the complete opposite of what he was in private. He was very timid and shy; hated talking about himself. It was as if he were disgusted sometimes." Bret laughed. "Of course this all changed once Hunter got into the picture."

"And here we go again," Shawn sang. "You always find a way to blame Hunter for everything," Shawn accused. "Why can't you let it go? Hunter wasn't—

"Yeah, yeah. Keep telling yourself that sweetie but Hunter wanted you for himself. I will prove that before the day's over with."

"Whatever," Shawn grumbled. "I'd like to see you try."

"Oh I will sweetheart. Trust me. Now back to what I was saying Chris. Shawn was very different off screen. So was Owen so I can say that Shawn's telling the truth. As for his many lovers, well, I think he should find another excuse for being a whore."

"Call me a whore one more time and I will walk out that door," Shawn warned. "Anyway Chris, I guess the best way to sum up my sex life is to say that I really was a 'Boy Toy'. I liked the person I became on camera and eventually I started using it in my private life. Some may say I needed counseling – which to this day I'll admit I probably did – but it made me feel good about myself when I wasn't alone so I didn't care."

"I see. Wow. So before we get to this transitional period in your lives, can you two tell me how you went from being friends to secret lovers?" Both Bret and Shawn shifted nervously, neither one really wanting to go there. For a moment Chris thought he should run having asked a very taboo question. It wasn't that he was trying to be nosy but so much had already been revealed that he figured, why not? After a few minutes of an awkward silence, Bret finally let out a breath.

"Fine," he snapped. "I'll start."

"Now wait a second," Chris said quickly. "You don't…remember that you don't _have_ to answer any of my questions. I'm not…I mean, I don't want you to think that—

"It's fine," Shawn said softly. "If he's willing to talk, then I will listen and add my piece when the time comes."

"I'll talk," Bret answered. "Besides, I can't…I just can't deny that we were good friends anymore because we were." He sighed. "I guess I should start with our growing friendship. Around this time, Shawn was still with Sherri…"

* * *

AN: If you don't understand Shawn's relationship with JBL then don't beat yourself up. JBL is very special to me and right now, I'm still kind of stuck on him and Shawn. They work in a weird way and I like them. They are a rarely used pairing but of course, they won't work unless it's done right. Since I'm too lazy to go into the whole story of how they hooked up, I'm going to refer you to another fic titled 'The Deal'. This actually kind of ties in with the epilogue of 'The Deal'. If you want to know the long, sad, angsty history of their relationship, Shawn's past relationships, and how they managed to fall in love, you'll have to read it because I honestly cannot explain it all in this fic. It would take too long. Most of you have already read it so you're good. But I was just giving everyone else the head's up in case they thought JBL was really random. Next update? I have no idea. I am focusing most of my time on my Original fics but every now and then when I get stuck on something, I'll be updating this fic. Thanks to all who have been reading and I hope you continue to be patient with me.


	10. Session 6 Awkwardness & The First Kiss

**AN: Long chapter but it couldn't be helped. There was no way to break it up otherwise it would interrupt the mood of Bret's story. So...enjoy. Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. :D Just so you know, this story is starting to become a bitch simply because of all the damn research involved. It's also a bitch having to recreate the memories but I figure maybe it'll pay off in the long run. As long as you're happy, I'm happy. So...really...enjoy.**

* * *

Bret watched as Shawn planted a kiss on Sherri's cheek before they went their separate ways. Sherri was leaving the building while Shawn was making a dash towards the break room. He was probably thirsty Bret deduced but who could blame his body? Shawn had just wrestled one hell of a match against some nobody and Bret was sure Shawn was well on his way to getting one of the belts soon. Bret continued to stand in the hall waiting for Davey but when he didn't show Bret decided to go inside the break room. Once inside he found Shawn standing near one of the long tables helping himself to some water and donuts. Bret couldn't stop himself from laughing at the kid. Shawn jumped at the sound but then immediately showed signs of relief when he saw that it was Bret.

"God you scared me."

"I'm sorry," he grinned. "I just couldn't help myself when I saw what you were putting in your body." Shawn looked down at the glazed donut in his hand and shrugged.

"Yeah well I figure I'll work it off. Besides, I love donuts."

"I don't think you have anything to worry about. You worked your ass off out there. Did you really have to beat him that bad?" Shawn's face flushed a little and a nervous laugh escaped him.

"You…were watching that?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't I watch? You're amazing in the ring. Only one of the rookies I need to watch out for."

"I don't think so. But uh…to answer your question, I've been trying for almost a month to get Vince to give me a shot at one of the belts. Vince refuses because he doesn't think I'm old enough," he said mockingly. Bret couldn't help but laugh at his anger.

"I'm sure he'll come around. I'm pretty sure Vince sees that not many of the others can keep a pace like you in the ring."

"Honestly – and I'm not trying to sound arrogant – but I really feel like I haven't had any competition since Marty left. Everybody else just seems…I don't know," he sighed. "Maybe it's because I'm restless. Being alone all the time kind of makes you that way." Bret didn't know why but Shawn's confession of being alone all the time stung him a little. Bret knew all about being alone but that's because he chose to be a loner with the exception of his family. Otherwise, it wasn't like he was completely alone. But Shawn…now that he thought about it, he never once in the three years they've been working together, seen him socializing with anybody.

"Well don't give up just yet. When you've beaten them all at least three times, Vince will have no choice but to come around," he joked in an attempt to lighten the mood.

"Yeah I hope so." Shawn took another sip of his drink while Bret poured himself some Coke. He wasn't really thirsty but he noticed that every time he was around Shawn, he would feel kind of…awkward. They drank their drinks in silence every now and then waving at people as they came in and out. When Shawn was done eating his last donut, he turned to Bret and smiled.

"Well I need to go get a quick shower. In case I miss your match, good luck out there."

"Thanks but I thought you said 'quick' shower?"

"Well," he laughed. "When you're a 'Sexy Boy' you have to take the time to do tedious things like wash your hair five times."

"Ahh okay. Enjoy your shower."

"I will. Later," he grinned flashing Bret his warmest smile to date. When he was gone, Bret shook his head ridding himself of any thoughts he may have had of Shawn shirtless then started out the door.

"Oh no you don't," a voice called out. "Just a second bro. We need to chat." Shocked, Bret turned around to see Owen staring at him with a hint of tease in his eyes. Bret frowned.

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough to see that you need professional help."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he frowned.

"Hey… No need to get so defensive. I was only teasing," he grinned. "Besides, I'm not really sure what I saw."

"Explain."

"Uh…well…you and the kid…"

"What about us?"

"Its nothing really," he shrugged. "I just…couldn't help but notice how…awkward you two seem around each other."

"Awkward?"

"Well yeah. I mean, I'm sure if I was him I'd feel awkward around you. After all you are the champ around here."

"Not yet."

"You will be soon but forget that. I was only making an observation."

"I see. So…"

"Just forget it. I just thought I'd point that out. Awkwardness is never a good sign if you know what I mean."

"Oh forget you Owen," he said hotly. "Are you implying…?"

"I wasn't _implying_ anything," he said coolly. "I'm just saying. Everyone in locker room thinks he's swinging on the other side of the fence so if you're going to be friends with him, at least make it public."

"It's not like I'm trying to be his secret friend Owen. We talk every now and then. This time he just so happened to be in here when I got here."

"Yeah I know but you two were so focused on each other that you didn't even notice me when I came in."

"But I—

"Leave the kid alone Bret. I already told you on day one, he's got some kind of charm. I know you probably think being around him is harmless but I know you. You've never been this taken with anybody – not even your last girlfriend, which makes me question whether or not you even realize what's happening to you."

"Are you telling me that…?"

"I'm telling you that I think you like the kid. Maybe not in _that _way but you like him."

"Owen…"

"I'm through with it bro. I was only teasing you but some of what I said has some truth to it. You don't have to listen to me. It's not in your nature to treat anyone badly. Just know that I picked up on the awkwardness and if I picked up on it, others will to." Owen patted his brother's shoulder as he brushed past him out of the room leaving Bret alone to brood.

**--xx--**

Bret had his main event match that night and afterwards decided he'd rather go and hang out at the hotel room. Besides, he needed time to think and boy did he have a lot to think about. After taking a quick shower, he threw on some jeans and a tee then headed out the exit. He hadn't got far when someone called out to him. He turned around to see Shawn leaning against the wall with a big grin on his face. His long hair was hanging freely and beautifully alongside his baby face. He was wearing some jeans that looked tighter than ever and a Heartbreak Kid t-shirt. His eyes seemed to sparkle under the dim light hanging over the exit and Bret found himself just staring…again.

"Wow Bret. I know I'm supposed to take breaths away but I would think you'd be an exception to the rule."

"Oh..uh…I'm sorry," Bret managed. "I just…wasn't expecting to see you, or anybody for that matter."

"No, it's cool. I don't know why I even…"

"Don't you start apologizing for waiting up," he warned playfully. His face was playful but his tone of voice was anything but. Shawn looked down nervously nodding his head before speaking up again.

"I…decided to stay and watch your match tonight."

"Oh? Whatcha think?"

"You really are quite the technical wrestler. I had a hard time tearing my eyes away." Even as he said the words, Bret could tell he was a little embarrassed. He bit his lip and through the dimness of the light, Bret could see a hint of color rise to his cheeks. It was cute. No other word could describe it except cute.

"Best compliment I've gotten from anyone since I've been here." Shawn looked up, clearly shocked by Bret's words.

"Really?"

"Oh yeah." Bret dropped his bags on the concrete and moved to stand next to Shawn on the wall. He looked up at the night sky to keep his eyes from tempting him to stare again as he spoke. "People don't always appreciate the art that comes with wrestling. Most of the guys prefer to just 'get by', but not me. I think of wrestling as an art and hopefully someday I'll have an opponent who can push me to my limits. So far though – and I'm not trying to sound arrogant – but no one has pushed me to my potential just yet. I didn't spend all those years training with my dad and traveling around the world for nothing."

"Wow. That's amazing. No wonder you're so good." Bret cut a sidelong glance at the blonde and smiled.

"Thanks, but I really don't think you should think any less of yourself. You're good and who knows? Maybe someday we'll meet in the ring for the big one." Shawn turned to Bret, a smile creeping on his face.

"I'd be scared to death of getting in the ring with you. On the other hand, I'd be honored."

"Well then." Bret straightened himself up and stuck out his hand. "Let's shake on it."

"Huh?"

"Let's make a deal. Promise me you'll keep striving to be the best. You do that then I guarantee we'll make art someday in the ring."

"But—

"No buts. You're good enough and if you keep working your way up I'm sure we'll be in the ring someday."

"But…I've never even won a belt yet." Bret took his hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"Look at me." Shawn slowly met Bret's gaze making his heart rate speed up for no good reason. Bret forced himself to speak again. "I'm not going anywhere. Ever…at least I don't plan on it. So I'm pretty sure I'll be around when you're fighting to see whose top dog. It'll just be you and me. What do you say?" Shawn looked away for a moment shaking his head.

"I…I'll try," he answered softly.

"Good." Bret released his hands. "So…what are you doing tonight? I mean, like…have you eaten anything?"

"Actually, I kind of raided the break room after I showered. But um…" Shawn looked down at his watch and groaned. "I'm sorry I kept you so long man. It's been an hour and it doesn't even feel like it."

"An hour? Really?" _Doesn't feel that way. Feels like we only just started chatting…_

"Yeah." Both men paused not really knowing what to say to one another. They both opened their mouths to speak again but ended up laughing it off.

"This is…wow."

"I know. I can't seem to say what I need to say."

"Me neither actually." Again there was an awkward silence which only made Bret think of Owen. _Damn him…I guess I need to go before someone sees me…_ "Well uh…I guess I'll…" Bret started backing away as he spoke though he never took his eyes off the blonde. Shawn quickly nodded.

"Yeah. Me too. Sorry for keeping you."

"It's no prob. So uh…I guess I'll see you next we—Ooph!" Bret hit the ground with a soft thud. He wasn't looking where he was going and sometime during his conversation with Shawn he managed to forget all about his luggage sitting in the middle of the parking lot. _Oh damn…_ Bret raised his head to find Shawn standing over him with an amused look on his face. His hand was outstretched but his grin said he was enjoying this moment all too well. "You think this is funny?" Shawn shook his head furiously though that did nothing to stop the snickering. Bret reluctantly took his hand and allowed the blonde to help him up.

"Are…you alright?" he managed between laughs. Bret rolled his eyes. He wanted to be pissed at him but the smile on Shawn's face melted any and all potential animosity from him. So all he could do was feign anger.

"Don't hand me that fake concern. You're enjoying this way too much."

"I'm…yeah I am, but I am concerned. You didn't break anything did you?"

"Naa…thanks though. If anything it was worth it to see you smile again." He hadn't meant to say it but he did and it was too late to take it back. _Damn word vomit._ But before he could even think to feel awkward Shawn said something that made his pulse race.

"It's…kind of hard not to around you." Shawn smiled again but just as quickly he started backing away. "It was nice talking to you. Don't trip over anymore bags. G'Night." With one last wave he was off.

***~*~***

"After he left, I quickly loaded my bags and sped straight to the hotel. Everything about that night had me on edge. I…I remember watching him leave and not wanting him to leave." Bret cut his eyes towards the divider, pausing to collect himself before he continued to speak. "We were having such a good, harmless conversation that I got caught up in it. Since I was usually with my brother and cousin, it made for a nice change to be able to talk with someone other than them. Plus…I…guess you could say that's when I realized I wanted to keep him…as a friend."

"Wow," Chris said softly. He turned to Shawn and nodded. "So Shawn, is it safe to assume that you felt the same way?"

"I…don't know how I felt about being his friend."

"Why not?" Chris asked. "Bret's story says you both were feeling pretty awkward or was it just Bret?" Shawn shook his head.

"No, it wasn't just Bret. I felt…whatever it was too but at the end of the night I still felt alone. It's just that...talking with Bret gave me a reason to keep on wrestling. I was still going home to an empty hotel room. I rarely heard from my parents and Sherri was really just doing Vince a favor…or so I thought at the time." He sighed. "I later found out that Sherri really was my friend but I was looking for something more."

"Like a companion?"

"No, not necessarily a companion but a friend for the road ya know? A guy friend that I could talk wrestling with, grab a couple of beers and just…you know, do guy things. On the other hand, I did lay in bed at night wondering if I could think of Bret as a friend. I certainly liked him and he was the only person besides Pat Patterson or Sherri that believed in me from the very beginning."

"So what happened after that night? How did your friendship continue to progress?"

"It actually _over_ progressed after that and led to some more pretty awkward moments between the two of us," Shawn answered.

"I don't think awkward begins to cover it," Bret added. "It was more like…well hell it was about as bad as it is right now," he laughed. "Can you imagine having the feeling of limited air, tense, sweating, headache, and constantly looking over your shoulder because you're afraid of what people might see? That's how I felt. 'Course I don't know about him. Half the time he acted as if it didn't happen."

"Well what did you expect me to do? People already thought I was gay and then for you to kiss me like that—

"I didn't kiss you," he said flatly. "It…was an accident."

"Yeah," Shawn scoffed. "Keep telling yourself that. And all the other times you kissed me was an accident too right?"

"Whatever. My point is Shawn, you kept your cool better than I did."

"And we both know why right? Because I didn't have people planting homophobic ideas in my head like your brother Owen. 'Oh Bret, he's going to make you gay!'" Shawn mocked.

"Keep my brother's name out of your mouth!" Bret snapped.

"I'm sorry but it's the truth and you know it! That's another reason why we were doomed from the beginning and why to this day you're as miserable as ever!"

"YOU DON'T KNOW WHY I'M MISERABLE!"

"I'm not…going to argue with you right now," Shawn growled. "Just…either tell your side of the story or allow me. We need to speed up the process so I can get back to my loving boyfriend."

"I'm sure he is," Bret grumbled. "Fine. I'll talk but no interruptions from you. I'm telling it the way _I_ saw it which means you'll shut up and take it."

"Fine." Bret took another deep breath and started talking.

"After that night, I guess you could say we ended up 'finding' each other all the time. Shawn would watch my matches and wait up for me. I would watch his matches and then if Owen wasn't around, I'd seek him out to talk about the match. We probably never would have admitted it to anyone at the time, but we were good friends – close friends in private. I think things started getting really weird after we went out for drinks one night…"

***~*~***

Bret sat in his truck waiting for Shawn to come out of the hotel. They'd already made plans to go get drinks after the show but Shawn insisted on changing first. So they drove back to the hotel only to find that they were staying at the same hotel and on the same floor no less. Coincidence? To anyone else they'd probably think otherwise but it was the truth. Turns out they both waited until the last minute to book a room. Bret usually took turns with Davey rooming with Owen but this was his week to room alone. So Bret had to take whatever had a vacancy and just his luck he was able to find a room at the Hilton. Not bad for a last minute booking. A minute later Bret spotted Shawn coming out of the revolving doors. Bret quickly looked away to avoid any staring since for some reason he couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from him.

"Hey!" Shawn smiled as he got in the truck. Bret flashed him an equally warm smile as they drove off.

"Took you long enough," Bret joked.

"Yeah well when you have this much hair…"

"You're such a girl sometimes!" Bret joked.

"Blame it on Sherri."

"Well…you gotta admit, it's getting the job done. Bunch of screaming girls."

"Oh come off it. You're one to talk. Didn't some girl try to jump the railings the other day after you?"

"Uh…I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Yeah, okay." The rest of the ride was in complete silence except for the rock music playing in the background. They arrived minutes later at a small bar located on the south side of Charlotte. Bret entered first relieved that only a few drunks were out at this time of night. He led Shawn to a small booth at the back on the far right that way he could see everything going on. Shawn sat across from him and it was then he realized his mistake. Now he would be forced to have a civil conversation with him without staring at him. A waiter came by and took their orders returning moments later with two cold beers.

"So how are things with you?" Bret asked.

"Fine I guess."

"You guess?"

"Depends on what you mean. If you mean wrestling then it's going great actually. Vince is finally going to let me have a shot at the I.C. so I'm really excited about that. I've been putting double time in the gym lately just to prepare for the match."

"Ahh…that means you'll be facing Davey in the ring."

"Yeah and I'm nervous but excited too. I can't wait to get in the ring with someone as good as him. It'll be fun," he grinned.

"Gotta love your optimism. When I think of wrestling Davey I think of how much of a headache I'm going to have the next morning. You certainly will feel it in the morning after tusseling with him."

"Wow. Well I guess I'll have to prepare for a night of pain then. Since Sherri won't be with me anymore I'll have to start taking care of myself."

"No more Sherri?"

"Yeah. I uh…I kind of told Vince I wanted a change of character. Plus, Sherri's pretty much done all she can for me. It's time for me to do things on my own now."

"Nothing wrong with that. Are you still keeping The Heartbreak Kid name?"

"Yeah just…modified the character a bit. Probably going to come off as an arrogant jerk," he laughed. "But it's so out of character for me that I really have no problem doing it."

"Sounds fun." They sipped on their drinks some more in silence, both lost in their own thoughts. After a while though the weird uncomfortable awkwardness crept back on them and Bret was forced to speak again. "I think I heard The Fink say you're from San Antonio, Texas."

"That's right."

"You know you really don't look like somebody from Texas. If I had to guess I'd say you were from one of the coasts."

"That's why you should never judge a book by its cover."

"Touche."

"So you…You're definitely not your typical American. I can tell just by your work ethic alone. But tell me about you. How was it growing up in Canada?"

"If my dad was anybody but my dad, life might have been a little less tense. My father…I wouldn't say he ran a military style home but at the same time, he had to do what he could to keep order. Being one of the youngest of 12—

"12?! Your parents had 12 kids?"

"Yep."

"Wow. I can't even…imagine…So what are you? Number…?"

"11. Owen's the baby."

"That had to make for an interesting home life."

"It did. My father was a trainer. Trained a couple of the greatest technicians today including Owen and me. To say that I was always interested in wrestling professionally would be a lie. I never really wanted to become a wrestler but it's one of those things I felt obligated to do. I can just remember being 12 years old and dad asking me if I was going out for the wrestling team. Yeah, sure I told him. When you grew up in a house full of wrestlers and trainers you kind of didn't have much of a choice."

"Wow. So…you kind of did it more or less because he expected you to?"

"Yeah, something like that. My father will always tell you that he never pushed any of us to wrestle. It's true but the flip side of it is that he would have been disappointed in us since wrestling was in our blood so to speak."

"Ahh, I see. But you know, at least you had someone to support you. My parents to this day think wrestling is a joke. My dad let me do it because he believes every man should get out there and make his own mistakes. But I don't feel like this is a mistake. I feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be."

"Then if you feel that way then don't worry about it. I think if you follow your heart then you'll never go wrong." They drank and talked about growing up for another hour or so, not even realizing that the bar was closing up. They had been talking for almost two hours nonstop and it wasn't until Shawn's watch beeped that they realized how late it was.

"Shoot it's almost 3am."

"Yikes. We should get going."

Ten minutes later they were stepping out of an elevator heading towards their rooms. Since Shawn's room was the first stop, Bret didn't figure any harm would come in walking with him. When they reached his door, Shawn turned to him and smiled.

"Thanks for the drink. I really needed it."

"Don't mention it. Thanks for the talk. At least now I know a little bit more about the person who's been worrying me half to death," he joked.

"I don't mean to. You shouldn't take what I say to heart so much. I'm still just getting used to being alone so of course I'm going to be a baby about it until I actually grow up."

"I tries but it's kind of hard when someone so beautiful is always crying."

"Beautiful?" Bret's face heated up quicker than a fire on a stove. _Fuck I did it again! Why can't I control my words when I'm around him? _Bret looked down at the floor avoiding Shawn's curious gaze.

"Uh…I mean…you know. You're a beautiful person and all," he added quickly. "I uh…just don't like it when you cry."

"You don't?" Bret looked up and met the most stirring pair of gentle eyes he'd ever seen. It was like they were drawing him nearer. Shawn was the first to look away but something in Bret wanted to see those eyes once more – just once more before he went to bed.

"Shawn." It came out more of a husky whisper than anything else which seemed to startle both him and the blonde. Shawn looked up at him, meeting his intense gaze. He smiled weakly before turning around fumbling with the room key. When he finally managed to get the door unlocked, he quickly turned to wave good-bye to Bret only to bump right into him. Shawn slowly raised his head, his eyes closing the instant he felt warm breath on his lips. Bret's lips were now touching Shawn's because at the moment, curiosity was winning over reason. "No…I don't," he whispered. "I don't like it when you cry."

Without thinking, Bret gently ran his fingers through Shawn's hair, clasping the back of his head and pressing their lips together. There was instant current that ran through Bret's body. He wasn't sure if Shawn felt it, but when his lips parted, Bret's tongue was more than eager to enter his mouth tasting him. He didn't know if it was the soft sound that Shawn made or the feel of his warm palms cupping the side of his face. His mind all of sudden started functioning and he drew back with a horrified look on his face. He opened his mouth attempting to say something. I'm sorry he mouthed before hurrying down the hall to his room, doomed to a sleepless night and the first of many.


	11. Session 7: A Pretty Friendship

For a moment the room remained silent, neither man in the room daring to breathe. Bret opened his mouth several times to continue his tale but sound refused to come out of his mouth. He was still a little shaken by the story he just told; a true story that was supposed to remain buried in the depths of his soul forever…until now. Bret shifted uncomfortably in his seat with a part of his mind wishing he could see Shawn's face again. But he knew what would happen. Or rather, he had thought about it enough in the last couple of hours and had reduced it to two things, one of which before now he knew would never happen. But now he was not so sure and it was best to just keep the divider up to save him the heartache. Finally after a long awkward silence, Chris spoke up.

"Thank you for sharing that Bret," he said softly. Chris turned to Shawn who was now staring down towards the floor with a blank expression on his face. Chris cleared his throat proceeding with his questions. "Shawn after hearing this from Bret, I'm pretty sure it's safe to assume that your friendship became even more awkward." Shawn slowly nodded his head. "Alright. Do you care to elaborate or would you rather I moved on to something else?" Shawn shook his head.

"No. I'll talk," he managed. "I just…it's been so long. I practically forgot all about that night."

"Figures you would," Bret mumbled. "But no lies Michaels. It happened and you know it."

"I wasn't going to deny it Bret. I know it happened. I just…it's been so long that I barely remember it. What stands out more than that first kiss is all the weirdness that took place afterwards. We avoided each other like the plague during shows and if we managed to run into one another, we kept it brief. This worked for a while but it did nothing to ease the growing tension between us."

"What do you mean?" Chris asked. Shawn let out a deep breath before continuing.

"I guess you could say we were attracted to one another since our first meeting though I can't really speak for Bret." Bret scoffed at this.

"I don't really know how I felt but at the rate I'm going today it's looking more and more like I've always been stuck on your impossible ass. So sure. What the hell Chris? I guess you could say I'd been curious since day one." _I just didn't know it._

"You don't have to get so angry Bret," Shawn snapped. "I'm not at all happy about this either but the truth is the truth. The way is sounds right now is that you and I had an instant attraction."

"Fine. I'll agree to that so will you continue please?"

"Fine," he said rolling his eyes. "What I'm getting at Chris is that after a while the attraction becomes unavoidable. Any little touch, brush, breath – any contact whatsoever can be a big deal. The sexual tension between us was so thick that it made breathing around each other taboo. When you've been physically attracted to someone for so long it's bound to explode at some point even if it's just in spurts."

"Wow. So how long did you two keep this up until…you know?" he asked nervously.

"Well…it all started with a few close calls…"

**~*~*~**

Shawn stood in front of the mirror in his locker combing through the wet strands of his hair. He was all alone in the locker room which meant he could relax and take his time without worrying about what guys were whispering behind his back. He hated being in the locker room when others were around…well, except for Bret and even now it was just as hard being around Bret. Shawn's eyes suddenly closed remembering the way Bret's hand clasped his head bringing their lips in contact. For weeks Shawn imagined it was just a dream and maybe it was, but that couldn't possibly explain why he and Bret were practically avoiding each other all the time. _And I thought we were going to be pretty good friends from now on… _The thought made the blonde laugh. _Since when have I ever had good friends who actually cared enough to stay with me? All of them seem to leave me so maybe something is wrong with me… _A single tear fell down the blonde's face and then another until he was practically sobbing. A gentle touch on his shoulder made jump. He quickly spun around gasping when he saw a pair of familiar, gentle eyes staring back at him.

"Bret," he breathed. "I…didn't hear you come in." Shawn was tense. The air was tense and it didn't help that Bret was standing ridiculously close to him. All it did was make him think of other things…

"I'm sorry but you were so deep in thought…" His voice trailed off and Shawn knew what was coming next. "Why are you crying again?" he asked. Feeling slightly irritated Shawn snapped.

"Stop…being so concerned about me Bret. I'm fine."

"No you're not and I can't help it. We're friends and I want to be there for you."

"Well don't. I'm fine. Really. Just go…"

"Shawn—

"Please?" he begged. He could not take this closeness any longer. He was having a hard enough time breathing and he feared Bret's touch. One touch from him and…

"Are we alone?" Bret asked. Shawn blinked several times wondering what that had to do with anything but he didn't ask. He only nodded nervously hoping Bret would go away now. He did not. Instead he reached up and ran a finger under Shawn's eyelids wiping the tears that had not yet dried away. The gesture lit a fire in Shawn making him even more jumpy than usual. _I have got to get out of here so I can breathe…_

"I…I'm leaving." Shawn quickly brushed past Bret in an attempt to escape. He was in such a hurry to get away that he failed to avoid the huge dumbbell lying in the middle of the floor. His foot caught the bar. He spun around trying to avoid the fall but ended up flailing backwards onto the floor.

"Shawn!" Shawn cursed himself mentally for being such a klutz. His head hit the floor pretty hard and even though his head was throbbing, it only made him that much angrier. He opened his clinched eyes to find Bret standing over him, his hand extended. Shawn reluctantly grabbed his hand in an attempt to pull himself up but he ended up bringing Bret to the floor with him. The raven haired Hitman landed right on top of him, his body positioned comfortably between his legs.

To say that it was awkward would have been an understatement. Awkward wouldn't even begin to cover it, but that didn't matter. In a matter of seconds so many things happened that Shawn barely had time to register said awkwardness. Bret's head was resting comfortably on Shawn's chest but due to the instant, subconscious reaction to Bret's fall, Shawn's arms were wrapped around Bret's back seemingly holding him in place. Quite the predicament it was until Bret decided to shift. He raised his head and Shawn's body just froze. He wanted to move. In fact, a voice in the back of his head screamed for him to move but he couldn't. Something – and Shawn couldn't be sure exactly what – brushed against his member and he reacted. Something of a half gasp half whimper escaped his lips and the next thing he knew Bret's mouth was on his. It was slow, almost a tease of a kiss but that quickly changed when Shawn's lips moved on their own. Bret wasted no time claiming his lips, shoving his tongue down his throat. Shawn's body reacted in every way possible, his hands betraying him by feverishly exploring his sides tugging at the tight tee. Shawn heard Bret moan for the very first time and it made his entire body react.

"Bret," he breathed.

**Beep. Beep. Beep.**

Bret's body suddenly froze. Then as if he'd seen a ghost, Bret quickly scrambled to his feet. Once again he extended his hands and this time he managed to pull Shawn off the floor with no problem. Bret pulled the pager from his side reading the tiny numbers.

"I uh…I have to go," he managed. "Owen."

"Yeah uh…"

"Good night."

"Good night." Bret tore out of the room like lightening and minutes later Shawn did the same, heading back to his hotel room for another sleepless night.

**~*~*~**

"That was the first of several close calls," Shawn continued. "I don't know for sure if we would have…you know if Bret's pager wouldn't have gone off but you best believe we were relieved. It gave us both an excuse to get the hell out of that locker room before we could do anything we'd both regret later."

"Bret did you feel that same way? Relieved?"

"Oh yeah," he answered. "You really have no idea."

"Just out of curiosity Bret, why'd you kiss him again knowing that it would only cause problems?" Bret let out a sigh.

"I…don't really know Chris. Like I said before, this is the first time in a long time that I've had to think about these things. That night…I can tell you that when I landed on top of him my body suddenly became more alert than ever before and when he gasped, my body just…it was like an invitation. My body just moved."

"I understand. So I take it things only got worse."

"That's an understatement," Bret answered.

"I don't know if I'd say the tension was worse," Shawn chimed in. "We uh…kind of reached a point where the kisses were…how do I explain this…?"

"We found ourselves doing little things that daresay tested the lines of our friendship," Bret answered for him. "It helped at first, make our friendship seem more like a normal friendship though it was hardly normal at all. We still didn't talk much in public but…I don't know. I just remember…well here's an example…"

***~*~***

Bret stood idly in the airport lobby debating which plane he should get on. He knew Davey and Owen were probably getting on the first plane. He also knew that a lot of the lower card guys were probably on the second plane to avoid any unwanted attention from jokesters like his brother. While Bret loved taking long plane rides over seas with his family sometimes they could be a little annoying. On the other hand, Bret didn't want to get on plane two and have no one to talk with. After much debate, he decided on plane two. After all, it was still going to be a fairly long flight and if all else fails, he could always take a nap since these days sleep was hard to come by.

Bret grabbed his gear bag and headed through the second gate straight to his plane of choice. As Bret boarded the plane it was just like he suspected. Only a few guys were on the plane nearly all of them mid carders. Some of them acknowledged him as he moved to find a seat. Others ignored him completely. Bret shrugged it off not really caring if anyone talked with him. That only motivated him more to just take a nap. He looked around the plane trying to decide where to sit when he noticed what looked like some familiar blonde hair in the back. Fighting back the smile crept up on him, Bret headed towards the back. Much to his surprise Shawn was alone sitting next to the window staring out of it as if lost in thought. Bret cleared his throat and Shawn quickly looked around.

"Bret! Uh…what are you doing here?" He shrugged.

"I guess you could say I wanted to take a nap. That's damn near impossible when you're riding a plane with Owen and Davey."

"I guess you're right," he grinned.

"So…is this seat taken?"

"No. I usually sit alone but not because I want to. People just never ask. So…I usually just fall asleep ignoring everyone. This is the first time since Marty that someone's sit next to me."

"Wow." Bret tossed his bags in the seats across from then before taking his seat. "How come you never ride the other plane?" Shawn shrugged.

"I don't know. I guess I just feel more comfortable riding this one. The guys ignore me which is fine. It's better than listening to others whisper behind my back."

"Ahh I see. But you know, if you ever decide to ride the other plane let me know. I'll save you a seat." Shawn glanced over at him shaking his head.

"You think that would be smart considering…things?" he asked lowering his voice. Bret looked over at him surprised that he would even go there but Bret smiled. If he wasn't afraid to address their 'moments' then he supposed he shouldn't be either.

"Well…it might help," he laughed. "At least I'd have to control my actions. And for the record I do try," he joked. And it was more or less the truth. He _DID_ try to keep his hands and lips to himself but he couldn't help it. He wasn't doing it on purpose but it seemed like God had it in for him or if not God, somebody did. Every time he would forget to think and his body would cave in to curiosity.

"And for the record, I _DO_ try not to cry so much. I never thought my tears would cause so much trouble."

"You don't know your tears." Shawn laughed.

"I doubt you'll have to worry about any tears on this flight. I'll probably fall asleep soon anyway provided I can actually get to sleep."

"Sleepless nights?"

"Oh yeah. You have no idea." Bret looked over at the blonde and smirked.

"Well…I wouldn't go that far," he mused. "I haven't slept much either."

"In days?" Bret nodded. "Oh gee," Shawn laughed. "Don't tell me it's for the same reason."

"What reason would that be?" Bret inquired teasingly. Shawn glanced over at him biting his lip nervously. His eyes had a knowing look about them as if hoping Bret would answer for him, but Bret couldn't. He wouldn't have been able too anyway because he was too distracted watching the lips he'd managed to kiss accidentally one more than one occasion. Even now they looked just as tempting as ever which was wrong.

"I uh…" A small, nervous laugh escaped him. "I guess…I guess I couldn't stop thinking about all the times you've helped me…among other things," he added softly. Bret looked around and noticed that just about everyone was settling in to get some shut eye; a few of the guys already sleeping. He glanced back over at the blonde briefly afraid of meeting his eyes. They were practically invisible to everyone else on the plain which meant a repeat of past mistakes could happen and he didn't want to risk it.

"Same here," he added. Before Shawn's piercing blue eyes could trap him again, he quickly looked away fighting back the image from two weeks ago. A few seconds passed and both men remained silent. Bret was doing his best to ignore the fact that he really wanted to kiss him again. But it was so damn hard especially since the object of his evil desires was sitting next to him. _Get a grip Bret! You're into women… Even though Shawn's hardly a guy. He's too pretty…That long blonde hair and those eyes… Those soft lips that taste sweeter than anything I've ever tasted before…Damn I'm doing it again. God why can't I get him out of my mind? I'm definitely not gay so why am I attracted to him? _

Bret had no idea how long he'd been struggling with his inner self to sort out his problems. He just happened to glance towards the window and that's when he realized Shawn had fallen asleep. His head was resting in an awkward position against the window and Bret was certain it had to be extremely uncomfortable. Then again, commercial flights for long trips were hardly anything to brag about. Bret sat there for a second looking around to see what would be the best thing to do. He could move and sit in one of the empty seats across from them but it probably wouldn't help Shawn's comfort any more or less. Still if Shawn hadn't slept good in days Bret at least wanted him to sleep comfortably while he could. So he did the next best thing.

"Shawn," he whispered. He pulled back a strand of Shawn's hair attempting to wake him. The blonde stirred groggily looking around slightly confused. "You fell asleep on that hard ass window. If you'd like you can lean on me. I don't mind but only if you want to." Shawn didn't even answer. He simply allowed himself to be pulled into Bret. Bret gently placed his arm around Shawn allowing him to nestle comfortably underneath his arm.

"Bret?"

"Hn?" Shawn looked up meeting Bret's eyes.

"Thank you," he whispered. Bret caressed his cheek with the back of his hand, Shawn's smooth skin sending sparks through his body. He bent his head planting a kiss on his forehead.

"You're welcome. God you're so pretty," Bret breathed. He hadn't meant to say it but it was the truth and for reasons unknown he didn't care if Shawn knew how he really felt right now. He still considered Shawn his friend, but he also thought Shawn was pretty in a friendly sort of way…or at least that's what he kept telling himself.

"Someone else told me I was pretty. Coming from him I thought it was disgusting but when I hear you say it…I almost believe it."

"Oh but you are," he said soothingly. "If you weren't so pretty then I wouldn't be doing things I shouldn't do like…like kissing you all the time."

"Who said you shouldn't?" Shawn's inviting stare was all it took to make the raven haired man do the unthinkable again. He slid his hand under Shawn's chin drawing him in for another kiss. Their lips met and it was like the first two times – an explosion of passion mixed with the sweet taste of lust. A current spread through Bret's body all the way to place in between his legs startling him and frustrating him at the same time. He quickly pulled back from Shawn cursing himself silently while the blonde settled himself again for another attempt at a nap. It wasn't long after until Shawn was sound asleep underneath the Hitman's arms. The sound of Shawn's soft breathing was music to Bret's ears and pretty soon he too fell fast asleep.

***~*~***

"We both woke up when my pager went off," Bret continued. "It was Owen asking me how my flight went. I…think I ended up kissing Shawn again but up until now, I really had no idea why I was kissing on him. I knew I was attracted to him but I also knew I wasn't gay. Funny how 15 years can change one's perspective so much." Chris was about to ask another question but Shawn cut him off.

"Just answer me this Bret. I vaguely remember much of that flight because I think I really did fall asleep but… I just have to say that hearing all of this from you…hearing this _now_ really works my nerves." Shawn's voice was a mixture of anger and sadness that Bret couldn't quite understand.

"Shawn listen…"

"I just…we both started off so good you know and then it was ruined because of your—

"Don't you _dare_ blame all of this on me Shawn," Bret growled. "We were both attracted to one another."

"But you waited until I started to fall in love with you to act so—

"I don't want to go there Shawn. I'm sorry for a lot of things but I can't take back anything that happened afterwards because I was scared and confused. You knew this because I told you."

"BUT I GAVE YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO WALK AWAY!" Shawn cried. "I GAVE YOU SEVERAL OPPORTUNITIES TO WALK AWAY BUT YOU CAME BACK! YOU _ALWAYS_ CAME BACK!" He was so angry and so frustrated that tears were streaming down his face unbeknownst to him. Listening to Bret tell this story reminded him of so much. It reminded him of how his heart ached for Bret, how his body longed to be near him… _I hate him! I hate him all over again!_

"I tried Shawn," he answered weakly. "I…I wanted to walk away from you but you're so impossible and so—

"I was just good in the sack right?" he said coldly. "That's all I was good for right? _Your_ boy toy. Just like all the others."

"THAT'S NOT TRUE AND YOU KNOW IT! I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU DESPITE ALL THE TROUBLE YOU WERE WORTH!"

"YOU _DUMPED_ ME AND YOU _USED_ ME!"

"I DIDN'T…I…"

"Forget it," Shawn sniffed. "I'm…I need to go Chris. I don't…I can't talk anymore."

"Oh no!" Bret snapped. "You're staying. I have one more thing to say and if you wish to leave after that then fine but neither of us are leaving today until you hear what was going on in my head when we—

"I don't want to know." _I'd rather not know. I can't…my head already hurts and these feelings he keeps stirring up…I just want to go home to my…_

"But you're going to listen. I'm fucking serious. Right now, you've got me so confused and feeling so conflicted that even though my brain's telling me "No", my lips are disobeying by pouring every ounce of my soul out to you and the Universe."

"I don't—

"STOP BEING A SCARED LITTLE BRAT!" Bret snapped. "Not everything I have to say is going to be a diss to you. Is that what you're afraid of? If so then I must have failed you long ago," he said his voice filled with disgust. "You know that despite all of our problems Shawn I never _once_ made you feel like you were anything less than me. I didn't get mean until Hunter came into our lives but that's a whole other story. I loved you and since the day we met I did everything I could to encourage you and build you up. I never, _EVER_ tried to crush your soul so stay in your seat and hear me out goddammit!" The room got crazy quiet all of a sudden except for Bret's heavy breathing. Chris dared not to breathe while Shawn stared at the divider as if he were going to attack it. More and more intense dense air filled the room and Chris half wondered whether or not he'd have a stroke. Finally after ten, long minutes an angry Shawn spoke up.

"Fine," he growled. "But don't—

"You'll just sit there and shut up," Bret said through gritted teeth. "_I'm_ the one who needs to speak about this because quite frankly I'm the only one who knows how I felt about that day and that moment in time."

"But you can't speak for me." Bret scoffed.

"Trust me. I know how you felt. I remember every sound like it was yesterday which again, angers the hell out of me."

"Then forget about it," Shawn snapped again. "Don't tell the—

"I'm telling it and I'm telling it now. Chris. Pay attention big boy. You're about to leap face first into the start of a beautiful relationship."

* * *

**AN: Thanks for reading and reviewing. Don't you just love their friendship? The next chapter will be a doozy so I hope you stick around to see what happens next!**


	12. Session 8: Promises

**~**~**~**

_"How can I be strong I've asked myself  
Time and time I've said  
That I'll never fall in love with you again" _

**_by Janet Jackson_**

**~*~*~**

Bret and Shawn hurried off the plane after another really awkward moment. They headed out of the airport lobby straight to the parking lot. Bret had to catch himself to keep from hugging Shawn before they parted ways. Shawn got into a small rental car with another mid carder while Bret headed straight for his brother's rental car. Once inside, Davey and Owen cast knowing looks. Bret groaned.

"Don't…start. Just drive the damn car Owen." Owen grinned as he started the car and drove off. Owen and Davey talked the entire trip to the hotel. Twenty long minutes they fed Bret every mind boggling detail of the pranks they pulled on their sleeping co-workers. "You know, one of these days you two are going to get your asses kicked."

"Oh shush Bret," Owen said. "You know full well you would have laughed too."

"No I wouldn't. Well…not this time anyway. I was actually pretty beat which is why I ended up on the other plane. It was like heaven and I slept the entire trip until my pager went off."

"Oh really? You didn't stay awake and entertain a certain _blonde_?" Davey teased. Bret rolled his eyes.

"No I didn't. He…was actually asleep the entire trip too."

"_Really_ now?" Owen asked, raising his brow. "So…"

"So what?" Bret snapped. "Where are you going with this?"

"Nothing. I just…I've noticed that you two hang out a lot. Heard you guys had drinks a few weeks ago."

"Yeah we did but it was only once and we spent the entire time talking about me and his upcoming match against you."

"Hey! You didn't go telling him stuff about me did you?" Davey asked. "You know that's cheating!"

"Oh quit your bellyaching," Bret grumbled. "If he out mats you during your match then you'll be dropping that belt to him. And I would never tell our family secrets. We mostly just talked about growing up and things like that. He seemed like he could use a drink that night considering Sherri."

"Oh yeah," Davey said thoughtfully. "I forgot about her. So they're done?"

"I guess so," Bret shrugged. "Not that he needed her. He's starting to draw without her anyway. Bunch of screaming women."

"You're one to talk!" Owen teased.

They arrived at the hotel minutes later and headed inside. Owen was rooming with Davey this time which meant Bret had to room alone. He made his way to the check in to get his key.

"What's your name sir?"

"Bret. Bret Hart." The blonde lady started going through several notepads in search of his name. Unfortunately for Bret, he was not on any of the lists.

"I'm sorry sir but there's no Bret Hart on the list."

"What? You gotta be kidding me! Are you sure?" he asked irritably. She looked over at the notepad and started going through the names again shaking her head.

"We have an Owen Hart but no Bret," she winced.

"Alright. Fine. So is there any other rooms available?"

"Well…" She looked down at the list, her hand shaking as she held the pad. "I'm…sorry sir but…all the rooms are taken for the evening."

"Great. Just great," he mumbled.

"You could room with me." Bret spun around to find Shawn standing there nervously. "Uh..I just…I mean…if you don't want to drive all over town looking for a vacant room. But you don't have to if you don't…Your brother—

"Shawn…Shawn!" he laughed. "Calm down. I don't have a problem rooming with you," he reassured. "And I could care less about Owen right now. I just don't feel like driving all over an unfamiliar area looking for a vacant room so if you don't mind, I'll crash in your room." Shawn blinked a few times and then he smiled.

"Yeah. So I'll just…get the key." Shawn moved past Bret to talk with the clerk. A minute later she was handing him his key and the two men were heading towards the elevator in silence. Bret wasn't entirely sure what Shawn was thinking but he knew he had to have been feeling some kind of anxiety. If not then good for him because Bret was nervous as hell. Sure Shawn probably didn't mind rooming with him but Bret wished he felt the same way. He was the one kind of weirded out by it. Not because he didn't like Shawn. The problem was that he liked Shawn more than he should and he wasn't sure if it was going to be a problem. The awkward tension between them had come and gone during the last several weeks but not by much considering the plane ride. Anytime they were alone Bret was practically all over him which was wrong. It was wrong on so many levels and he really wanted it to end. However, it was so hard restraining oneself when the other person wasn't exactly pushing you away. So what did it mean? Bret was hoping he wouldn't have to think about it. In fact, he planned to stay out of Shawn's way as much as possible in order to prevent himself from doing something stupid. He wasn't sure yet what that "something" was; he just knew it couldn't happen. Ever.

The elevator opened up and Bret followed Shawn down the hall towards their room. Bret watched as Shawn fumbled with the key. His hands were shaking like crazy and Bret could only assume it was because he felt the tension rising too. But Bret promised himself he would ignore his curiosity. He'd already found out what he wanted to know and that was enough for him. To feed his curiosity more would only make things worse between them and he liked Shawn enough to protect their friendship. Shawn finally managed to get the door open and headed inside. Once inside however, he stopped dead in his tracks causing Bret to bump into him. Bret laughed.

"Dude. You okay? What's the…hold up?" Bret's voice trailed off when he saw what Shawn was looking at. One. Only one and for a second all Bret could do was laugh. God must have had it in for him because if this was a joke it wasn't a very funny one.

"Damn," Bret said under his breath.

"It…it'll be alright," Shawn said forcing a smile. "I could sleep on the floor later. It's no biggie."

"But it's your room. If anything I should sleep on the floor."

"Not going to happen Hitman. After your match tonight you're going to want to sleep on something soft."

"But—

"We're friends. I insist," he grinned. "Now shut the door and let's get settled in before we're late." Bret sighed.

"Alright. If you insist."

Shawn and Bret spent the next hour getting their things put away. Since they were going to be over seas for the next two days they decided that they might as well unpack what few things they had. As soon as they were done, they took turns using the restroom to change for the night's show. Shawn took the longest in the restroom considering he had to make sure his hair was perfect. When Shawn finally emerged from the restroom, Bret had a hard time keeping his eyes off of him. He wasn't wearing a shirt but his hair was hanging freely stopping just a few inches over his shoulders. He was wearing his favorite red tights with the hearts on them and they were (or so it seemed to Bret) tighter than usual. Bret tore his eyes away long enough to get the door.

"Ready to go Cinderella?" he teased. Shawn grinned his perfect grin.

"Of course. I suppose my chariot's waiting."

"You lucky I like you," Bret grinned shoving the blonde out the door.

***~*~***

"Bret is this really necessary?" Shawn interrupted. Bret rolled his eyes.

"Of course it is _prin_cess," he sang dryly. "You've told your side—

"Yeah but nothing like this!" he snapped.

"_Mar_ty." _And I had to sit through every excruciating detail…_

"That…that was different," Shawn stammered. "I needed to tell it for you to understand why—

"And I need to tell this in order for people to get a better perspective on the next chapter of our lives. Besides, it's all coming back to me now and if I don't get it off my chest I'm going to explode."

"Bret please," Shawn begged. "I don't…" he sighed. "I'd rather not…That night…" Shawn's voice trailed off. He was scared. He was scared to death. He'd buried that night deep into the back of his mind hoping to never recall it again. _That night is probably the single most emotional experience of my life and it took me years to get over it. Why can't he skip it? Why can't he…? _

"Shawn, I'm not doing this to make you angry. You told me things to better help me understand some things and I understand now. I understand what Marty meant to you but if I don't tell this then how can you possibly know how much you actually meant to me before things went bad?" Shawn remained silent for a long time deep in thought leaving Bret to wonder what was going on inside that head of his. It was unlike Shawn to be so afraid…at least of a little story so what was up? Had he really changed so much over the years that now he was actually afraid of something? Bret wanted to know but he was too afraid to ask. So he nodded at Chris.

"Uh…" Chris cleared his throat and continued even though Shawn seemed completely out of it. In fact, his head was down and Chris was sure he saw tears dripping on his thighs. He forced himself to ignore it and continued. "So the show…How was it and what happened later that night?" Bret chanced a glance over at the divider but all he could make out was Shawn's shape. From the looks of it, he was just sitting there quietly though Bret was pretty sure he was either sad or pissed. _I don't want to hurt his feelings… I've never wanted to hurt him. I loved him…I loved him so much. I just hate him for making me realize it all over again but I have to do this…_

"We both had a good show," he answered. "He wrestled a trial match against Davey and they rocked. I also had a match that night against Jarrett and we brought out the best in each other. After work Shawn and I both waited to get a shower back at the hotel. Shawn insisted that I shower first since I was "older". We laughed and joked all the way back to the hotel. No tension outside the ordinary ya know? I mean we always felt awkward around each other but we'd been friends long enough to get past it. Well…at least that's what I thought until I saw him come out of the restroom."

"Bret don't…" There was a desperate sounding plea in Shawn's voice that almost made Bret change his mind but he couldn't. The scene was already playing in his head like an old movie and it was doing crazy things to his body. On the other hand, that plea in Shawn's voice was all too familiar. It was the trigger that always made him feel sorry for him. That plea…It always led to tears; tears that Bret hated with a passion. He hated seeing that blonde cry but hearing him cry was just as bad. _He's going to cry through the entire thing and probably scream at me for putting him through this._ _I didn't want to relive these events anymore than he did but if I stop talking now then I'll go home and drive my family crazy. I can't… Not now. I need him to know that I really did care for him but if he won't listen then this will turn out to be just another one sided interview filled with gaps. We both promised each other we'd tell the truth…I have to…I have to do something… I have to make him stay._

"Shawn I have to."

"But you any idea what it's doing to me Bret?" he cried. "I'm…I'm trying so hard to keep my mind on John. I keep telling myself that everything we felt for each other has gone out the window but the more we talk, the more I'm proven wrong and I hate it!"

"Don't you think it's the same way for me princess?" he snapped.

"I don't know! I just…and don't call me that!"

"Shawn look. I just want you to know that I'm actually telling the truth for once. If you're in hysterics over there then how can you hear my sincerity? I _need_ you to stop crying—

"What if I can't Bret?" he choked.

"Then I'll help you…like I used to." Shawn's eyes darted towards the divider, tears streaming down his face.

"You can't…You won't," he stammered hysterically. "You'd have to see me in order to do that and—

"I wanna see you," he said softly. Both Shawn and Chris' jaws dropped.

"Excuse me? I…I—

"I want to see you Shawn. I want…I need to see your face when I tell this story." _Because at least if I see you, your eyes once more, I can see what you're feeling and you can see what I'm feeling._

"Bret, are you _sure_?" Chris asked. "I mean, I have no problem lowering that divider but…"

"I…I don't know if I can…I…John…" Shawn was still freaking out because his emotions were all over the place. He hadn't felt this confused about anything since his entire ordeal with Hunter, Chris, Jeff, Cena and John a few months ago and that was pure hell. But compared to this, it was like heaven. At least with them, there were no deep rooted feelings stashed with chain after chain of secrets, painful memories, and love.

"I want to see you again Shawn," he managed. "I think I'm finally ready to face you again after all this time."

"Why Bret? Why now?"

"Because I…might…still…possibly…love you…_a little_ and it would help if I could see you to make sure." Bret buried his face in the palm of his hands cursing himself silently. _What have I done?_ He'd said it. He didn't want to say it but he did. He didn't know _why_ he said it either considering Shawn was stubborn enough to ignore his confession but it was the truth. The entire hour or so that Shawn was away for lunch, Bret had entirely too much time to start sorting through his feelings. _The longer this interview goes, the more trouble I'm going to be in._

"Don't," Shawn whispered. "Don't say that. I can't…I can't…I don't want to know. Keep it to yourself. I love John!"

"Then at least let me look at you once more." His voice was almost as desperate sounding as Shawn's. Fuck it. He was through being a stubborn bastard for today. For years he'd been contemplating ways to see Shawn again; mostly because he wanted to see if Shawn would actually apologize but as the interview progressed, Bret longed to see his face. He wanted to see those eyes he fell in love with once more and he wanted to see Shawn's reactions to everything he said during the interview – good or bad. It didn't matter. All that mattered was seeing him again.

"Bret—

"I promise…I promise not to cross the line. I just…I just want to see you. I'm not going to hit you like I told the Canadian Sun a year ago nor will I scream at you. Too much has happened during this interview and to be perfectly honest I don't think I have the heart to hurt you. I hate it when you cry. You know that so will you please…_please_ let me see you?" After a long pause Shawn finally nodded towards Chris though he still had the same, guilty yet sad look on his face. Chris nodded towards the camera man who in turn, reached behind him to press a button on a remote. Slowly the divider starting lowering itself down into the floor, the baritone sound of the machine whirring as it lowered exciting Bret with each passing second. Shawn on the other hand, was on the verge of a mental breakdown, his body shaking uncontrollably from his crying. _This isn't happening. Bret's not in this room. Bret's far away from me and I'm about to leave to see John. The man I love. The ONLY man I love… _Shawn covered his face with his hands sobbing uncontrollably until he felt warm hands clasp his wrists. _I won't look. It's not him. I won't…I won't…_

"Shawn," he whispered. Shawn's body just froze, his heart stopping too in the process. That voice…Only that voice could make his body react in such a way. He closed his eyes as his hands were lowered from his face then came warm hands cupping his face. "Please…please look at me." Shawn shook his head violently, his eyes refusing to look. He wasn't ready. He just wasn't ready and yet… "Please. I…I need to see those eyes Shawn. Remind me why I fell in love with you." Shawn's eyes finally opened meeting Bret's for the first time in almost 12 years and yet…

Bret's heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest it was pounding so hard. _Those eyes…those eyes are the same…_ Bret almost burst into tears himself at the sight of them and what was worse, Shawn was crying. His beautiful jewels were flooded with tears and they were streaming down his face as he stared back at him. It was the same. It was the same feeling he felt the first time this happened only this time he knew what he felt. Bret pressed their foreheads together but Shawn lowered his eyelids, refusing to meet his gaze.

"No, no, no…this isn't happening," he sobbed.

"Shawn I'm here. I'm here because I want to be." He kissed his forehead then wrapped his arms around him pulling him to the floor. He held Shawn tightly against his chest, entangling his fingers in his hair while the blonde just sobbed against him. "Oh Shawn. Don't cry. I need you to stop crying."

"Why are you doing this to me?" he choked. "You hate me remember? You're supposed to hate my guts! You're supposed to be screaming at me, blaming me for everything that's happened between us!"

"I don't wanna blame you right now," he pleaded, his voice cracking as well. "I just want to hold you like I used to. I just…I just want to…dammit Shawn I _want_ to hate you! I do but when I hear your voice…and see you like this, my heart won't let me. Shawn…Shawn look at me." Shawn shook his head. "Shawn…please? Princess?" Shawn allowed Bret to raise his head so that their eyes met again. Bret held his face, using his thumbs to wipe his tears. It felt so natural. So right. It was like 12 years never happened. Just the two of them – alone – with Bret taking care of him like he used to.

"I don't want to let you take care of me," Shawn choked. "I want you to hate me and I want to go back to hating you." Bret chuckled softly.

"I'm sure by the end of this interview we'll be back to normal but for now can we at least pretend we still care? If you at least pretend then I won't feel so stupid about wanting to kiss you." A frown followed by raised brows and a gasp led Bret to do the unthinkable. He pressed his lips to Shawn coaxing him into a slow kiss. Shawn gripped his shoulders kissing him back for reasons unknown. Both men claiming the other's lips, the fire burning within them with each passing second. For a minute Chris wasn't sure if he should leave or beg to join them. Finally after what seemed like forever, Shawn willed himself to push Bret away and made a run for the door. He pulled and twisted at the knob but it wouldn't open.

"Dammit," he choked. "Open…up…"

"Shawn don't…" But Shawn ignored him. He continued to fight with the door until Bret's arms enclosed him from behind. "LET ME GO!" he yelled.

"No, Shawn…please…I need you. I need you to stay!"

"YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT THAT WHEN YOU LEFT ME!"

"Let's not get into that right now."

"NO, GOD BRET PLEASE!" Shawn's body went limp in Bret's arms and he once again gave into him. He was tired, he was hysterical and his head hurt. Bret whispered comforting words to him, kissing the back of his neck.

"I know you don't want to hear this right now, but if I don't tell you now then I may never get the courage to tell you later."

"No," he moaned. "Let me go." _I don't wanna know… _Shawn twisted furiously in Bret's arms until his grasp tightening rendering him motionless.

"No! Shawn…princess listen to me," he breathed in his ear. "Listening to you tell that story about you and Marty gave me the courage I needed to finally come to terms with my feelings. I can't lie anymore Shawn. You ruined that the moment you let me see you again."

"Please," he pleaded. _John…I love John…_

"I regretted my marriage for the first few years of my life," he continued. "I regretted it with every fiber of my being because I didn't love her. Over time I grew to care for her but standing here right now, I can honestly say that I never did learn to love her properly."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because you're the only person I ever loved and right now, at _this_ very moment, I am _still_ in love with you."

_Oh boy. That can't be good…_ Chris let out a slow steady breath. _This is going to be a long day. JBL, you and Shawn have a problem…_

_

* * *

_**AN: Ahhh well sorry about the delay but life catches up with me sometimes. I really need to wrap this one up soon but I can't just yet. Don't know when I'll be updating this one again because it usually takes me a day or two to figure out where I'm going. (I type everything from my head so I NEVER know how each chapter will begin or end.) Thanks for reading as always. If you haven't been reading the little series of Shawn OSTs I have out, you should because I plan to add some Bret (for me) and Marty (for Seraphalexiel) later. All of them aren't smutty. Decided to do several different types to keep my muses running. Plus, I usually update it when I hit a block with this one. Thanks goes to everyone who has been reading and reviewing. Hope you enjoyed it! (It was a pain in the ass to write, especially since I'm at home with annoying people.) Let me know what you think :D**


	13. Shattered Defenses & Broken Promises

**AN: Just so you know, I may or may not be able to update for a really long time. My personal lap top has some broken keys and I cannot type with broken keys. February (unless my father can fix them) is the earliest time I can get a new lap top. So....just in case, now ya know. This chapter's not great because I got frustrated at times and it got to the point where I just wanted to finish it already. Ahh well it bes that way sometimes:P And so we pick up where we left off...maybe this will make up for the long delay...****  
**

* * *

"No…no…I won't let you do this!" Shawn choked. "You loved your wife. You still love her now get _away_ from me. I…I need to go see John."

"John's not here and until we finish this part of the interview, I can't let you walk out of here because you might not come back," Bret reasoned. He kissed the side of Shawn's neck and the blonde just broke down again, all of his defenses shattering. He never thought this could happen. He never imagined – at least not since his healing began with John – that he'd ever have to do this again. He never thought he'd ever get to actually sit and talk with Bret. Then again, there were times in the past where he imagined himself attempting to apologize for Montreal but it always ended in Bret punching him in the face and screaming every obscene word in the book at him.

And at first that's how it began. They yelled at each other; Bret screaming at Shawn and calling him a liar for everything he's ever done but somewhere during the interview everything changed. In just a few short hours Bret went from hating him to loving him and it wasn't right. Shawn struggled again.

"Bret please let me go. I _don't_ love you anymore."

"I'm sure you don't princess but it doesn't change how I feel."

"But we haven't even discussed Montreal yet!" Shawn snapped angrily. "You're letting old feelings confuse you…You don't…you don't love me anymore Bret! It's all in your _head_!"

"Maybe it is but if you don't stay then I'll never know for sure."

"Bret—

"Let me tell the story…Let me get it off of my chest and when it's all over you can go back to John," he said soothingly. "We'll both go our separate ways for the day and if you want to continue the interview tomorrow then I'll be happy to meet you back here so we can wrap things up. But just please…please hear me out. I need you to understand that what we had was real. That night…it meant everything to me Shawn."

"I…" Shawn sighed. He didn't want to hear it. He didn't want to even go there, _especially_ there. Now that he was finally in a complete relationship reliving that night meant experiencing all kinds of emotions that were meant to stay buried forever. It didn't matter that he hadn't seen Bret in person for over 12 years. Feelings were still there and most likely they were always going to be there. John knew that which was why he forced him into this interview. Shawn was terrified beyond reason and did not wish to go through with this at first because he had no idea how he would react upon seeing Bret._ I thought I could do it. I had built this invisible wall around myself just in case I grew weak. When he lashed out me earlier, I just knew I could do it but now… Now I wish I never would have agreed to this in the first place…_

Shawn was so lost in thought that he didn't even realize that Bret was pulling him to the floor. He didn't notice it until he was sitting between Bret's legs leaning back against him. The raven haired man's arms fit comfortably around his waist while his head rested on his shoulder. He kissed Shawn's neck earning another soft plea.

"Bret don't."

"I can't help it." He breathed in the familiar scent of Shawn reawakening senses he thought were long gone. "God you smell wonderful."

"Just…please…get on with the story so I can leave." _I…I don't know how much more of this I can take…_

Bret had almost forgotten that there was even anyone else in the room. He looked over at Chris who was desperately trying to make himself look interested in his Blackberry. He suddenly looked up and apologized for being in his own little world before clearing his throat to speak again.

"Uh…sorry," he mumbled. "So um…Shawn—

"Please Chris, no more," he pleaded softly. Chris nodded his head, his heart going out to Shawn in every possible way. He could only imagine what was going on in his head…and his heart. He gave Bret the nod and he finally started speaking again.

"We both knew that our friendship wasn't exactly normal," Bret continued. "I mean, how many best friends kiss each other all the time you know?" Shawn squirmed again but Bret only held him tighter. "Shawn here…well…I can't really speak for him but I know for me, that night was special. I uh…I kind of…figured out that I was in love with him that night."

"So how did you get such a revelation?" Chris asked. "Was it something he did or said that made you realize your feelings?" Shawn's body sort of tensed up in Bret's arms, a sure sign that he was literally on the verge of another breakdown. Bret planted another gentle kiss on his neck and rubbed his stomach.

"I need you to relax princess." One of Bret's hands slipped underneath the blonde's shirt and started caressing the bare flesh of his torso.

"No!" he breathed. "Don't…" But the hand inched higher and higher until it reached his chest. Bret's fingers brushed his flesh lightly sending a tiny shudder through the blonde's body.

"That is what I did to you that night Shawn," he whispered. "This is what started it all. Your whole body shuddered from every touch turning me on in ways I never thought possible and so I took you. I made you mine and I was yours."

"Stop it!" He didn't want to hear anymore but Bret wasn't letting up.

"And you just did it again. Stop fighting me Shawn. You shuddered from my touch, tensed up the moment we made contact because you know. You feel it too only you need reminding."

"Bret please…" The blonde started struggling again doing everything he could to keep his brain focused on John but it was no use. Bret's arm held him in place while his other hand pinched one of his nipples earning a sweet moan that filled the tiny room. "Ahhh…"

"You guys…" Chris sighed. While he wanted to get the interview over with, he was having a hard time staying focused on the task at hand because of all the sounds Shawn was making. Bret was doing things to him; things that he was sure John Layfield would not approve of yet it seemed like Shawn really was powerless to stop him. It was like Bret had some kind of invisible power over him and Shawn was struggling to break free yet the more he struggled, the more the power consumed him. Chris tore his eyes away. _I should feel sorry for Shawn. I should be lashing out at Bret for taking advantage of him but for some reason I can't. I can't interfere if it was meant to be. John…John you fool! _Chris decided it was time to get a move on. He wasn't sure how much more of this he could take being that Shawn was a former best friend and lover anyway. He cleared his throat then continued with his questions.

"Bret you say that night was the turning point in your friendship. I think I have a general idea of what might have happened but in your own words, tell us what happened. What made that night so special?" By now Shawn was calm – for the most part – though Chris really wasn't sure what was going on in Shawn's head. Tears were still slowly streaming down his face but there was no emotion in them whatsoever. His face was blank and his eyes no longer held that spark Chris was used to. It was as if Shawn was dead to the world though in Chris' view, it was probably for the best. Bret sighed.

"I don't really know where to begin so…I guess I'll just start with Shawn's shower…"

***~*~***

Bret stared up at the ceiling from his bed. It was an amazing sight. At first Bret thought the room was far from fairly priced until he noticed that the ceiling was actually made of glass. Tonight there was a crescent moon. Despite the stormy weather, the moon and the stars were shining brighter than ever bringing light into their hotel room. Bret smiled. It was the perfect way to wind down after a grueling night of wrestling and what a night it had been. Bret's entire body ached like crazy but it was to be expected. He was thrown into the steel steps too many times to count and the mat wasn't exactly kind to him either having landed awkwardly several times. _At least I'm not having to sleep on the floor…_ _The floor…_ Bret frowned. He knew he should have been more than grateful that Shawn was allowing him to have the bed tonight but he still felt bad about it. Shawn's match against Davey probably had the little blonde's body screaming all over the place yet he still insisted on sleeping on the floor instead of the bed. _His_ bed. His bed in the room that _he_ paid for because an idiot friend of his forgot to book his own room. _Actually I should be grateful that the little cutie even allowed me to room with him in the first place considering…things…_

The thought made Bret smile as it reminded him of their conversation from the plane earlier that day. It was Shawn who was the first to admit the awkwardness between them and even after admitting it, he still let Bret sit next to him despite the risks. _Well…risks on his part considering __**I'm**__ the one who's always trying to satisfy said curiosity and even then it's not enough. _It was never enough and as much as it pained him to admit it, his brain was telling truth. Ever since that first hug, that first kiss, the first time he heard Shawn gasp the name "Bret", he'd been dying to hear more. It was wrong. It was very wrong because fully satisfying the rest of his curiosity meant doing something he knew he wasn't ready for; something that his brother would surely disown him for if he knew but he also knew it was getting harder to resist. Hell, in broad daylight on a fucking plane, he managed to throw all reason out the window just to taste his lips again; to make sure he still tasted sweet and to feel the electricity soar through him once more. It had been great and the funny thing about it is that he wasn't sure if anyone else saw or not. He didn't think to look at the time. Hell, he didn't fucking _think_. He just acted which was a bad habit in need of breaking before he could do something else stupid.

The restroom door suddenly opened and Bret's nose immediately whiffed the scent of Shawn's body wash. _Oh God…_ Bret closed his eyes praying silently that God wouldn't do this but God laughed in his face (at least to Bret) because the scent just wouldn't go away. _No… He always smells good. Get a grip Hitman. Just ignore him and all will be well…_ A deep breath later and Bret found that his resisting Shawn was easier said than done. The sexy (_did I just call him sexy?_) blonde was still standing in the doorway combing through his gorgeous hair. That towel was wrapped ridiculously low around his waist which frustrated Bret. He knew he shouldn't have been angry or frustrated but because the towel was hanging so low, it only led his eyes to wonder what lie below the towel. Actually he should have known considering he'd seen Shawn naked before but he never actually paid attention. I mean, it wasn't like he'd always been attracted to men and now that he thought about it, the only man – person even – that he was remotely attracted to was Shawn…who just so happened to be a man…though Shawn was hardly a man. The way he wore his hair, his tight pants, the way his hips swayed in the ring every night to his 'Sexy Boy' theme…

Bret let out a huge breath. Just thinking about the way Shawn's hips moved was enough to remind him of the slight tingling sensation running through his member. Bret dared to cut his eyes towards Shawn again who was now coming out of the restroom. He turned off the lights then crossed the room towards the dresser, the light from the moon making his wet body shimmer. Bret groaned, his member starting to tingle even more. _Why is he so fucking beautiful? He's a man for God's sake but the most beautiful man I've ever laid eyes on._ Bret watched him search through the drawer, his breathing becoming ever so shallow by the second. His heart was racing furiously and he was pretty sure he could blame it on the blonde.

Bret slowly rose to his feet and crossed the room towards him. Shawn seemed to have finally found what he was looking for; a pair of white boxers to slip on for bed. He shut the drawer then moved his hands to unravel the towel. He suddenly gasped, his body tensing up. Bret towered over him from behind, his hands slowly sliding around his waist. Bret knew what he was doing but at the same time he didn't know. His brain wasn't really functioning but his body certainly was and at the moment, his hands were telling him to unravel that towel. And so he did. Placing his lips at Shawn's ear, he whispered, "Let me help you with that".

The towel fell swiftly to the floor and Shawn's whole body started to tremble. Bret pulled the blonde against him, his hands slowly sliding up his torso. He bent his head and buried his face in the nape of Shawn's neck then sniffed all around the back of his neck to the other side. Shawn's body was steady trembling from the touch, soft whimpers now escaping him beyond his control. Bret felt instant heat when Shawn's body suddenly fell back against him. He didn't know it but Shawn could barely stand on his own two feet he was shaking so badly with want. The Hitman guided his hands up Shawn's slick, wet body, stopping temporarily to tease his nipples.

"Ahh…," Shawn gasped and Bret just had to hear more. He brought both nipples between his fingers loving the way Shawn fell into him from his touch. "Ahh…Bret…" he moaned again. Bret kissed the back of Shawn's neck before turning him around so he could see his face. Shawn's eyes…They always seemed to draw him in and this time was no different.

He cupped the blonde's face, running his hands through his hair as he drew him in for a kiss. Shawn parted his mouth allowing Bret to explore as he pleased. Slow and sweet the kiss began but Bret's hunger soon took over. He deepened the kiss, exploring his mouth greedily. He used his body to press Shawn against the dresser, gasping himself when he felt the blonde's erection pressing against him. It was such a turn on. He tore his lips away just long enough to gasp for air before capturing his swollen lips again. He just couldn't get enough of him and he didn't want to. He just wanted to bury himself in Shawn and stay there forever. Shawn's trembling arms reached up to clasp his sides, his touch causing Bret to shudder as well. Bret's lips left Shawn's to nip at his ear.

"You are so beautiful," he breathed. "Hang on tight beautiful." Shawn wrapped his arms around Bret's neck and was suddenly lifted off the floor. Bret carried the blonde effortlessly over to the bed laying him down in the center where the moonlight's rays highlighted every delicious area of his body. Bret's breath hitched in his throat at the sight before him. "So…fucking…beautiful…" _And all mine…_ Bret crawled over Shawn's body to take his trembling lips once more while his hands eagerly explored the rest of him. His hands roamed all over his front as if trying to learn every dent, curve, or scar on his body. Shawn gasped and shuddered when Bret's fingers lightly brushed over his member turning the Hitman on even more. Bret tickled his member again until he finally got the most beautiful sounding plea from him.

"Mn…Bret…Please…" Shawn whimpered. "I need…I want…"

"Anything to hear you sound like that again." Bret clasped his member and slowly started caressing him. Shawn's hips thrust forward at the touch but just as quickly Bret pulled away. Shawn was rock hard and judging from the sound he made, he wanted more of his touch. And he would get it after Bret satisfied another part of his curiosity. He flicked his tongue across Shawn's lips before licking his way down Shawn's slick, sexy body. He lingered over Shawn's nipples, sucking them raw until Shawn pleaded for him to stop. The pleasure was so great that Shawn was sure he'd explode soon.

"Please...Bret I'm…"

"Not yet." His kissed his way down to Shawn's belly button stopping briefly to tease it with his tongue before he found his erection. By now Shawn was practically panting, his chest moving up and down quickly to prove it. Bret flicked his tongue over the head and Shawn practically screamed.

"Oh fuck Bret!" He gripped the sheets, whimpering, begging Bret to quit torturing him but it was that torture, the sweet whimpers from him that made Bret want to hold out even more. Bret licked the head of Shawn's cock again only this time he focused solely on the slit. The blonde was begging Bret to end it now, his precum leaking into Bret's mouth. Bret licked his lips and decided to end his little game. He covered Shawn completely taking him deep into his cavern. He was amazed by how sweet Shawn tasted and completely lost himself in pleasing him. He sucked Shawn harder, lapping up every ounce of his cum as it dripped down his throat. Shawn's hips were thrusting forward into the warmth but not for long. He was already on the verge of exploding and with a final hard suck from Bret, he screamed his name, exploding in the Hitman's mouth. His body trembled violently having cum so hard, his breathing now rough and shallow. Bret watched the blonde fall back against the sheets, his slick body steadily glowing under the moonlight. Bret had held out for as long as he could but now…

He just had to have him. He rid himself of his shorts tossing them to the side before slowly sliding his body over Shawn, parting his legs in the process. He looked deep into his eyes and was overcome with so many emotions. He felt it. He felt something and that something told him the thing he'd been dreading for weeks but there was no denying it now. He reached up to move his fingers along Shawn's lips. Shawn's tongue darted out to taste his finger before he pulled them in to suck on them. Bret watched, mesmerized at how cute he looked sucking on his fingers. He pulled his fingers out and slid them between Shawn's legs to loosen him up.

"Ahhh!" Shawn wriggled his hips at the sudden intrusion but it wasn't long before he was welcoming the fingers. Bret pulled out of him, his cock tingling with desire. He looked down into the blue jewels he loved so much. He brought his lips to Shawn's and whispered, "I love you". At that moment Bret finally thrust into him, muffling his scream with a kiss. The blonde clung to him, his hands gripping his sides tightly as he whimpered in pain. Bret sucked on his neck, moving in and out of him slowly as best as he could so as to not hurt him so much but it was hard. Shawn was unbelievably tight and Bret wasn't sure how much longer he could go without exploding inside of him. Shawn suddenly arched his back, pulling Bret's body closer to him.

"More," he gasped. Bret didn't need telling twice. He bit down on Shawn's collar thrusting harder inside of him. "Ahh…don't stop…" Faster and harder Bret moved inside of him drawing nothing but small cries that were music to his ears.

"Shawn…you're so tight baby…I'm…I'm gonna cum soon."

"Do it. Cum for me." Shawn's warm breath on his ear telling him to cum was more than he could handle. With one final thrust, Bret exploded inside of him, both their cries filling the moonlit room. Bret collapsed on top of him not bothering to pull out just yet. He didn't want to anyway. He'd gotten a taste of something sinfully delightful and wanted nothing more than to stay buried inside for as long as he could. He managed to raise his head to look at his friend and hoped that Shawn wasn't too angry. He sighed.

"Shawn…I…I'm sorry," he said weakly. "I just…Please don't be mad at me." Shawn stared back at him, his eyes glazed over but filled with that sparkle he loved so much.

"Don't be and why would I be mad?"

"Well…I hurt you. I know I did and I didn't mean to. And…and this…I've never…and I might have said some things and—

Shawn placed a finger over his lips silencing him.

"I'm fine," he said with a kind of tired smile. "And those things you said…don't worry about it."

"But I mean…I said it…and I'm pretty sure I meant it…I know I did it's just—

"Its okay," he whispered. "I understand so don't worry about it." Bret wasn't entirely sure what he meant but if it was what he thought then Owen and the others would never know. It was for the best. Bret finally willed himself to pull out of Shawn. He rolled over on his back and Shawn turned, folding into him resting his head under the Hitman's arm.

He played with strands of Shawn's hair watching him in the light until he finally dozed off. Bret watched him for a long time as he slept deep in thought. He'd made love to a guy for the first time in his life and loved every second of it. He wondered how in the heck he was going to make it from now on. Sleeping with Shawn didn't exactly make him want to sleep with other men no matter how good it was.

On the contrary, it just made him want to keep Shawn all to himself. Shawn was too beautiful; too innocently sweet to let anyone else have and he selfishly wanted to keep him. He knew it was going to be tricky because no one could know. Ever. But he wanted to at least try. He didn't really want this to be a one time thing. It was too good and Shawn was too perfect to just let go. He looked down at the sleeping blonde and kissed his forehead. _I love you princess…Too much to let go just yet… I'll find a way to keep you. I promise…_

***~*~***

Dead silence. Even Chris was at a lost for words. He looked over at Bret and Shawn and realized that Bret was probably trying to control himself. Sometime during the story both his hands found their way underneath the blonde's shirt caressing him to keep him calm. If you were to ask Chris though, he'd probably tell you that the caressing only made things worse. Shawn was in tears and from the looks of it, completely at Bret's mercy. He didn't even fight him when his lips met the side of his neck again which made Chris wonder whether or not things would bode well for John later on. After hearing Bret's story, Chris was painfully aroused and really needed to get back to his room to think. Just hearing the way Bret described their lovemaking was more than enough to turn him on. He knew all too well the sounds Shawn made during sex and he was ready to get out of here for the day before he lost his cool. Plus, he was starting to feel guilty about the entire interview. _If Shawn and John don't last then this will all be my fault but…_ He cast his eyes over at the two ex lovers and sighed. _But Bret loves him._ _I can tell by the look in his eyes and this interview was just what he needed to realize it but at what cost?_ He didn't want to ruin the moment but he needed to get them talking again so they could wrap things up. No more. There would be no more questions for today. He was exhausted and he was sure Shawn needed to get away to figure some things out. He cleared his throat.

"Thank you Bret for uh…tell us that. It was beautiful," he admitted. "And it really says a lot about the two of you. I wasn't planning on asking anymore questions but…I have to ask one more before we leave for the day." Chris took a deep breath then asked the one question that was racking his brain. "Shawn, sweetie, did you love Bret? Did you realize that night too that you were in love with him?" There was a long pause and then Shawn burst into tears.

"Yes," he choked. "I…I have to go." Shawn jerked violently, scrambling away from Bret. He stood to his feet and bolted for the door, though very awkwardly since his legs didn't want to move. Bret scrambled to his feet after him.

"Shawn…wait." Shawn shook his head.

"No," he replied coldly holding his arms out. "No more from you. I don't—

"Just promise me you'll finish out the interview. Promise me you'll come back tomorrow."

"I…I can't…" Shawn managed to get the door open and hurried out of it only to be grabbed from behind by Bret. "No! Let go!"

"I'm not leaving town Shawn. I won't leave until we've settled this once and for all."

"It doesn't matter anymore Bret. It's over between us!"

"Maybe. Maybe not but I know you feel it. I know you feel the awkwardness…the tension between us. You let me touch you just now which means you remember. You remember more than what you're letting on but you keep trying to play it off because of your loyalty to John."

"No..stop…"

"The truth hurts Shawn. I know it does but it hurts me as well. To know that I still love you after all of these years hurts me so much because you're not mine anymore. You belong to someone else but…" He spun him around and shoved him against the wall. "I want you back princess. I want you all to myself again and I'm going to win you back."

"You can't because I don't love you anymore!" Even as he screamed the words, his voice and eyes started to betray him.

"Liar," he said softly. Bret leaned in and pressed their lips together coaxing him into another kiss. Bret deepened the kiss taking Shawn's breath away like he used to years ago. He pulled away shortly watching him sadly. "Give John my regards." Unable to breathe properly, Shawn dashed away from him practically running down the hall. He was grateful when the elevator door opened quickly allowing him to dash inside for safety. John…He wanted to see John but he was afraid. Shawn reached into his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Hands shaking, he managed to dial the number. _Please…please pick up…_

"Hello?"

"Jeff," he choked. "Jeff it's Shawn."

"Oh..God Shawn. Are you alright babe? What's wrong?"

"I'm…where are you?"

"I'm still in Stamford."

"Please…can you come pick me up? I'm at headquarters."

"Be there in five." The line went dead and Shawn's body just slid down the wall of the elevator. He buried his face in his hands and just sobbed.

**x-x**

Meanwhile, Jeff grabbed his keys and started for the door.

"Hey, where you going?" Hunter asked. He was sitting on the bed in their hotel room playing a game on his lap top while Jeff had been sketching some drawings.

"It's…Shawn," he winced. "He uh…just called me to come and get him."

"Oh okay. Where's John?"

"I don't know but Shawn's…really upset. He was crying." Hunter looked up from the computer screen frowning.

"It wasn't John was it? And how come he didn't call me?"

"Because he knows how you are and no, I don't think it was John. It sounded more like…" He paused thinking about the interview he heard Chris bragging about earlier in the week.

"Jeff? What's going on?" Jeff stared at Hunter's confused face. It still hadn't dawned on him about the interview which could only mean…

"You…don't know?"

"Know what?" Jeff sighed. _I hate to tell him this but he's going to find out sooner or later…_

"Shawn's been at headquarters doing an interview session with Chris all day."

"O….k so what does that…?"

"It's an interview about Montreal."

"Oh…well…I suppose—

"Bret's here also." Hunter's jaw just dropped.

"Come again?"

"Bret…Bret's here. In Stanford…with Shawn."

* * *

**AN: We'll get some of Shawn's thoughts in the next chapter whenever that may be. We'll also possibly hear from Hunter, John and Chris again. **


	14. Guilty Conscience

AN: Most of my keys have been fixed. The only one still broken is the 'E' key but its okay for now. So here's another long ass chapter...

* * *

"What!" Hunter put aside his lap top and just stared at Jeff in disbelief. "You…you're kidding me right?" Jeff shook his head.

"Nope. Chris somehow managed to talk Vince into letting him do the interview but it was up to him to get Shawn and Bret to agree to it. If I'm not mistaken, Shawn only agreed to do the interview because John wanted him to."

"What?! Why the hell would he do that?" Hunter asked. "That's like…that's like suicide for the both of them. John should know…" Hunter laughed. "I can't even begin to tell you how many things are wrong with this scenario."

"It'll have to wait Hunty. I gotta go and get him before he does something drastic. Remember what happened with John…"

"Yeah. Alright. Go get him. Are you bringing him here?"

"I don't know. I'm just the driver. See you later sweetheart."

"Later." The door closed and now Hunter was alone for the first time in days. Ever since the incident with JBL a few weeks ago, Hunter was very hesitant to leave Jeff alone. He wanted Jeff to understand how much he loved him and was willing to do whatever it took. After almost losing him once he certainly didn't wish to rock the boat again. However, it was hard not to get involved in other people's business when it involved Shawn. Shawn and Hunter were no longer together but it sure as hell wasn't because they didn't love each other. They would always love each other but it was always better for them to remain friends rather than lovers and they were cool with it. But lovers or not, Hunter couldn't help but want to protect him even if he did belong to someone else and right now, he was fighting several urges.

He didn't know whether or not he should be furious at John, Chris, or both of them. The whole idea for such an interview screamed bad idea from the start so why the hell would anyone want to do it? Chris of all people should have known better in Hunter's mind. He'd been with Shawn before – briefly – but together nonetheless which meant he knew Shawn's history with Bret. Just what the hell was he playing at? As for John, he knew better as well. Hell all the rumors basically revealed that Shawn made that bogus deal with him months ago in order to save Bret's life. Nothing but unrequited love could have made someone sell their body and soul to another to protect a loved one. So John knew better yet he made Shawn do the interview. It just didn't make any sense to Hunter and now he wanted answers. Bret was and had always been a dangerous topic to discuss with Shawn. Even though Hunter was his best friend he could never get Shawn to talk about him. Not that he ever really wanted to considering…things, but there were still parts of Shawn and Bret's relationship that Hunter knew nothing about.

Hunter reached over on the nightstand and grabbed his cell. He dialed Chris' number silently pleading for the little prick to answer but he didn't. His phone was still turned off but Hunter didn't care. He left him a nice little message for him to return his call then leaned back against his pillows to wait. It was either that or hunt down John which always ended badly so he decided to wait. If he didn't hear from him soon he could always just stake out headquarters and wait for him there. _Sounds like a plan…_

**-xx-**

Chris watched as Shawn and Bret left the room in a hurry. He waited until he was sure both men were gone before he gave the camera guy permission to leave. He waited a few more minutes and then he too left the room, his heart weighing heavy inside his chest. He was fairly certain Shawn was in a hurry to get back to John but Chris wanted to intervene. He wanted to give JBL a piece of his mind even though he was just as much to blame as John.

"_But Shawn, I **want** to do this for you. Not only would this be the interview of a lifetime but it will help the both of you put an end to a bitter place in your lives. You can both move on with no regrets and you Shawn, you can move on knowing that you at least tried to make amends. People will see this interview. They'll see you reaching out to him but if he refuses then he'll be the one to look bad. Not you."_

Chris shook his head. _I forced him into this interview. I made him feel like he could do it knowing full well that Bret's hold on him was probably stronger than ever. Why? Why didn't John stop him?!? _Chris was now in the parking lot climbing inside of his Benz. He reached into his pocket having decided that he was going to call John but noticed that he had a missed call. He opened the phone and groaned. _Hunter…_ That could only mean one thing but the question was, just how the hell did he find out? Chris was fairly certain the voice mail was a demand to talk so not wanting to waste any time, he called Hunter back to allow him to rant. It would at least give him time to decide whether not he still wanted to talk with John.

**-xx-**

John tried to focus on his paperwork but he just couldn't do it. He glanced down at his watch and saw that it was nearing 5 o'clock. He sighed tossing his papers to the side. Shawn had been gone all day and he was starting to worry about him. He wanted so badly to just pick up the phone and call him up but he couldn't do it. He wanted his kitten to know that he trusted him despite the ex lover being in the neighborhood. And anyway it was his idea for Shawn to do the interview to begin with. Shawn was against it from the very start because he didn't know how he'd actually react but John pushed for him to do it and in the end Shawn agreed if only to prove how much he loved him. The thought still made him cry though because it always reminded him of…things…

"_Oh no. You say you hate me? Then fine. Hate me…and my money too. Make sure when you speak at Bret's funeral you tell his family that you let him die all because you're a selfish little brat!"_

"_No…John wait. Don't…DON'T DO THIS! YOU KNOW I CAN'T LEAVE!" he cried._

"_Oh so you wanna stay? You hate my guts but you love my money?"_

"_Something like that but…I mean…"_

"_GET OUT!" John screamed. He opened the door for Shawn waiting for him to leave but instead, he ended up getting a punch in the face. Shawn slammed the door shut and stood in his face defiantly._

"_I'm not leaving."_

"_Then you will do what I say or pay the price."_

"_Like I have much of a choice anyway," he grumbled. JBL was now furious. He grabbed Shawn's shoulders slamming him against the door. He placed a strong hand around Shawn's neck and began to squeeze slowly watching as Shawn's face began turning shades of pink and then blue._

"_John…please…I…I can't breathe…" he choked._

"_You should have thought about that before you decided to punch me in my face."_

"_I'm…I'm sorry…" JBL loosened his grip and watched slowly as the frail man before him took deep gasps of breath for air. Although a part of him wanted to feel remorse, he blocked it all out for the sake of himself. He was being too nice to Shawn, letting him get away with things he'd normally beat the hell out of others for. Well not anymore. That was all about to change right here and now. _

"_Shawn, sometimes sorry isn't enough. That being said, I think I'll put you to work tonight." Shawn glanced up at John, a small frown wrinkling his brow._

"_Work?" _

"_Yeah you see Shawn, I'm beginning to think that maybe I've been a bit too nice to you lately and I need to make up for it," he smirked. Shawn was about to ask what he meant when JBL suddenly began loosening his tie. "I gave you a break last week Shawn because I was in a good mood. Of course, good mood or not, in the past, I would have beaten the hell out of you anyway for defying me. Well I hope you enjoyed your break because from here on out, you're definitely going to start earning your pay."_

John wiped his eyes shaking his head angrily. He'd been so cruel to Shawn those first few weeks and to this day wondered how the hell Shawn managed to fall in love with him. Everyone knew John Layfield was an evil, manipulative bastard but only Shawn knew it was a wall. It was a wall until Shawn broke through it with his piercing blue eyes and his heart of gold. _I don't deserve him. I know I don't which is why I hope Bret wins him over. I love him enough to let him go. He deserves so much better than me and I'm alright with it. I will miss him though… My Shawn…My kitten…_ John gave up the fight and decided it was time to get out for a while. He grabbed his favorite hat, called his driver and headed out the door.

**-xx-**

Shawn sat outside headquarters leaning against the building waiting patiently for Jeff to come and get him. Chris walked right by him and he was glad Chris didn't see him. In fact, he doubted Chris saw much of anything judging by the look on his face. But Shawn couldn't be bothered with worrying about Chris. He had his own problems and they just kept getting bigger.

"Shawn." He groaned not even bothering to look up.

"Go away." Bret moved to stand beside him leaning against the wall.

"This brings back memories."

"Don't," Shawn growled. "I've had enough reminiscing for one day."

"Don't be so angry with me princess."

"Stop calling me that!"

"Look…I'm sorry," he said humbly. "I just…I never expected this to happen. Hell this was the _last_ thing I expected but now that it has I'm finding it just as hard to let you go now as it was years ago."

"Oh you sure had me fooled," he scoffed.

"Let's not fight."

"Let's not fight?" he asked indignantly. "Oh my…are you _serious_?"

"Shawn—

The blonde scrambled to his feet and shoved Bret against the wall.

"That's what we're _supposed_ to do Bret!" he screamed. "We fight because we're rivals. Always have been and always will be."

"We were lovers first sweetheart."

"It…That doesn't matter!" His nostrils flared and his face was turning redder by the second. "You know full well that we've been screaming at each other through the media for years. This was supposed be the same only I was going to have a fair chance this time to defend myself. Stop pretending that you love me!"

"But I'm not pretending!"

"Go back to hating my guts Bret." Shawn turned away from him shaking his head in an attempt to fight off tears again. Right now Shawn felt like his heart was being torn in half. There was the love he felt for John, the overwhelming feeling of having found the man who completed him…and then there was Bret. Unlike John though, Shawn wasn't sure what to call his love for Bret. Was it true love that never really died or was it all in his head? Was it just a silly obsession caused by years of wishing he could finally make peace with him or was it just a temporary thing brought about from their reminiscing? Shawn didn't know and he didn't really care right now. All that mattered was getting _AWAY_ from Bret so he could think. Bret moved to stand in front of him, his gaze as all knowing as ever.

"What?" Shawn snapped. "What now?"

"Nothing. I just…like seeing you. I haven't seen you in person for years and now that I have I can't keep my eyes off of you. You're still so beautiful."

"Stop…saying things like that!" he snapped irritably.

"You know what I think your problem is?" his voice now serious.

"What? What is my problem since you seem to know everything else about me?"

"I think you _do_ still care about me but you don't want to hear it because admitting you care would put a dent in your relationship with John."

"That's not—

"Yeah right," he scoffed. "And you kissing me back in the hall just now was nothing right?" he challenged. Shawn shook his head.

"I…you…I didn't want to…"

"But you did," he answered closing the gap between them. "And when you did it gave me hope." He cupped the side of Shawn's face drawing him near.

"No…no please…" But it was useless. He was powerless to stop Bret and maybe a part of him didn't really want to. The way Bret just took control over him…It was just like it was years ago. Shawn just couldn't say no to him no matter how hard he tried. Before he knew it Bret's lips were on his kissing him. Bret commanded his lips deepening the kiss until Shawn just folded into him. Bret wrapped his arms around Shawn never realizing that they were being watched.

**-xx-**

When Jeff pulled up in front of headquarters all he could do was watch with his mouth wide open. Shawn and Bret's lips were locked in a heated kiss that could probably put his and Hunter's kisses to shame. Jeff shook his head. This was not looking good at all. Jeff half wondered whether or not he should get out of the truck or blow the horn but he decided that subtle wasn't his thing. Jeff left the engine running and got out of the truck.

"Hey Shawn!" he yelled. He watched as Shawn jumped then instantaneously shoved Bret away. Bret grabbed Shawn's arm, whispered something in his ear before allowing the blonde to get away. As Shawn got nearer Jeff could see the tears streaming down his face. "Oh Shawn. I'm sorry." Shawn didn't say anything. He just ran into Jeff's arms allowing the younger man to comfort him. "I'm sorry," Jeff repeated. "I should have gotten here sooner."

"It's okay. Just…just get me out of here." Jeff looked up hoping he could get a good look at Bret but he was long gone.

"Where to?" he asked. "I could take you back to the room but just so you know Hunter's there." Shawn pulled away and shrugged.

"I don't know what to do Jeff. I really want to just get back to John but I'm afraid Jeff. I'm so afraid," he choked. "You saw…I know you saw…"

"Yeah I saw," he winced. "Come on. Let's get you out of here. We'll talk about it on our way to get ice cream." He kissed the top of Shawn's head before leading him away making a mental note to question Hunter later about a few things.

**-xx-**

Hunter's phone rang and he quickly flipped it open after seeing it was Chris.

"Hunter."

"What do you want?" Chris asked. "And please don't start with me about anything you know nothing about because today is not the day Hunter. I swear to God I'll hang up the phone," he threatened. Judging by the tone of Chris' voice, Hunter was now certain that things weren't going too well at the interview. Still it wasn't going to stop him from asking about it. He decided to tread lightly…for now.

"How's Shawn?"

"Fine I guess."

"Alright. How's Bret?"

"I guess he's fine too. Why you asking me?"

"Because you're the one doing the damn interview knowing full well of their history," he growled. "Tell me Chris. Are you _really_ that thick?"

"Of course not!" he snapped. "I knew what I was getting into. If anything I half expected them to scream at each other for a majority of the interview. I figured the worse that could happen would be that I'd have to cancel on account of one of them leaving."

"Yeah but it didn't work out that way did it?"

"Hunter look—

"Do you really hate Layfield that much to ruin what he has with Shawn?"

"No I…wait a fucking minute Hunter. How _dare_ you even…?!? You're one to talk! I'm not the one who beat the hell out of him with a sledgehammer then left him for dead on the hood of a limo! And for _your _information I wasn't doing it to get back at John! I was doing it to help Shawn move on…and maybe get the scoop for my Highlight Reel but nothing any more selfish than you!" he spat.

"I had nothing but good intentions when I kicked Layfield's ass. It just so happens that I only knew one half of the story but you…you know the history of Shawn and Bret yet you are willing to sacrifice Layfield's happiness for a scoop? That's low even for me. I'd have _never_ touched Layfield if I'd have known the truth."

"Yeah right Hunter." Chris' voice was shaky now and it was taking everything he had not to cry over the phone. He was truly sorry for doing this interview but he be damned if Hunter was going to pin the whole Layfield incident on him.

"So how is Shawn? Is he about to run off with Bret? I swear to God Chris—

"Now you listen to me you big nosed bastard. You were not in that room so you have _no right_ to start yelling at me about Shawn. Yeah so maybe I am having second thoughts about this interview but it's actually helping more than you think. Bret and Shawn are no longer screaming at each other. In fact, Bret was happy to see Shawn and actually forgave him for the incident in Montreal."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa there loudmouth. Slow down. Let me…let me get this straight. You mean to tell me Bret actually forgave—

"Yeah that's right. Forgave and wants to forget but Shawn wants no part of it. He thinks only of John all the while defending _you_ of all people." Hunter sat up on the bed frowning.

"Huh? What about me?"

"Apparently _you're_ to blame for a lot of Shawn and Bret's problems but we haven't gotten that far yet but I can't wait to hear about it. I always knew you were a selfish son of a bitch." Hunter scowled at the sudden amusement in Chris' voice. There was nothing amusing about this at all in his book and just the fact that his name was brought up made him even more dangerously curious about the whole interview.

"Chris…how'd my name come up?"

"None. Of. Your. Business." Hunter stood to his feet and started pacing the room angrily.

"Chris, I'm not playing man. My patience is wearing thin and unless you want to end up like Layfield—

"You'll do _nothing_," Chris answered dryly. "You'll do nothing because of Jeff and Shawn." Hunter remained silent though he was furious as hell. He wanted nothing more than to go through the phone and pound the hell out of Chris but that wasn't possible. And to anger him even more, he had to admit that Chris was right. He could never hurt Chris because Shawn would have a fit and Jeff would undoubtedly leave him again which he did not want. So he took a deep breath and tried again.

"Fine. You win but…please, _please_ at least tell me how my name was brought up. Jeff is on his way to pick up Shawn and it's possible that they're on their way here. At least…at least tell me what I'm getting myself into." There was a long pause before Chris finally spoke up.

"The interview somehow turned into the story of how the two of them hooked up," he answered softly, his voice showing hints of sadness that Hunter easily picked up on. "They uh…a lot of things were revealed today Hunter that would make your blood boil but it's not my place to tell you. But when it was all said and done, Bret told Shawn that he still loved him and your name was mentioned as the reason the two of them didn't make it." Hunter was at a lost for words but he couldn't honestly say that he hadn't expected it. Bret and Hunter were never actually friends. One could almost say they were bitter enemies from the start.

"I see." _Just what the hell did they talk about today?_

"Yeah uh…listen I got to run. I really need to…figure some things out. If they both come back then tomorrow's going to be one hell of a day and I need time to prepare."

"Uh…right. Say Chris. One more thing. Just…honestly…how exactly did the two of them leave this afternoon? Is it…possible that Shawn and Bret…?" Chris knew what he was asking and while the truth was normally the best answer, Chris feared a lie was best for this conversation.

"Uh…I don't know," he lied. "It's hard to say. Like I said, Shawn cried out for John several times during the interview. He was planning to leave half way through it but Bret wouldn't let him. I…I'll talk to you later."

The line went dead and Hunter dropped to the bed staring at his phone in disbelief. He was now itching to call Shawn's cell and find out for himself what happened. He knew that he couldn't just flat out ask but he could always tell by his tone of voice how angry or sad he was. _But I can't call him now. He's with Jeff and I don't want Jeff to think nothing of it…Damn you Chris! Damn you Bret!_ Hunter groaned. He now wished he could have been in on this interview even though he hated Bret about as much as Bret hated him. He was certain if they ever saw each other they would kill each other but that could wait. He just needed to know the status of Shawn's relationship with John and he needed to know soon. _Damn. Jeff has the keys._ Hunter laid down on the bed with the phone in his hand. He'd have to wait until Jeff got back with the truck before he could do anything which was probably a good thing. At least with the truck gone he wouldn't be tempted to look for Bret.

**-xx-**

Chris fumbled with his card key but was shocked when the door suddenly swung open. Chris' mood suddenly got ten times better at the sight of his new good friend.

"Oh Mike." Chris just sort of stumbled forward wrapping his arms around Mike. Mike (The Miz) returned the embrace with no questions asked. He and Chris had become close friends in the last month or so all because of a series of crazy events surrounding Shawn. Whether he knew it or not, Chris had been terribly hurt after the events involving Shawn's deal with JBL and unbeknownst to him, he needed Mike more than ever right not. It was the same for Mike. He'd never admit it to anyone but Chris kept him from feeling so alone especially since John was now dating Mark. John was always trying to get him to hang out with them but Mike always refused. It just wasn't cool being the third wheel even though Mark insisted it was alright. Chris suddenly pulled away and smiled. "I'm so glad you're still here."

"And leave you knowing what kind of potential disaster you were getting into? I don't think so," he grinned. He grabbed Chris' hand pulling him inside the room. He led him over to the bed where they sat in silence for a minute. As Mike watched Chris, he could tell that something was really bothering him. He looked so sad and Mike half wondered if he was missing Shawn again. The thought made him feel sad as well.

"I don't understand," Chris finally spoke up.

"What don't you understand?" Chris shook his head.

"I'm…I'm sorry Mike. I know you don't wanna—

"No," he reassured. "That's what I'm here for. Talk to me. You've been nothing but a good friend to me these past few weeks. I don't mind listening and you never know. I might be of some help…maybe."

"Alright. Well…I guess you figured that the interview isn't going so well."

"Well…yeah. You look kind of…sad," he answered honestly.

"I am sad but not because of my feelings for Shawn. It's…I just…I'm starting to think this interview was a really bad idea and if Shawn breaks up with John then there's no way I can blame anyone but myself."

"But why?" Mike asked. "You were only trying to help."

"Yeah…but…" He shook his head. "It was more than that Mike. Sometimes I try to take advantage of certain situations in order to benefit myself. This was one of those times."

"What do you mean?"

"I kind of…I mean I _knew_ the history of Shawn and Bret and…well okay. So I _did_ want them to resolve things and give Shawn a fair chance to clear his name but underneath all of that, I really just wanted to go down in history as the guy who got the scoop. The whole truth about Montreal. The one thing that no one else has been able to do. I didn't really take the time to think about the 99 ways this whole thing could go wrong."

"Oh…wow," he winced. "So…it's not going so well is it?" Chris just laughed but somehow Mike just knew it wasn't because it was really funny.

"No…I…it's actually going well depending on your idea of 'well'."

"Uh…" Mike thought about this for a second. Knowing the history of Bret and Shawn's rivalry well could only mean one thing.

"They aren't fighting?" he asked incredulously.

"No, not any more."

"But…why are you so sad?" Mike asked. "Shouldn't it be easier to get the info you need with them not fighting?" Chris shook his head.

"No. Actually…I think this is just as bad." Chris leaned back on the bed staring up at the ceiling. Mike did the same taking his place next to Chris.

"Why? Why is this so much worse?"

"You…I could tell you but…if you were there…if you'd have _seen_ it…John's going to flip…and it's all my fault." Chris covered his face and started to sob with his friend looking over at him with a feeling of helplessness. As Chris sobbed Mike felt like his heart was breaking in two. Never. He'd never seen Chris cry before. He was usually always so strong and did a pretty good job of hiding his feelings and picking up on other people's moods but not right now. Right now his guard was completely down and he was crying…in front of Mike. Mike felt a tear roll down his cheek and realized that he needed to do something – anything to let Chris know that he cared. He rolled over on top of his friend and laid his head on his chest. Chris' hands slowly fell around the kid holding him tightly in place.

"Mike." Mike raised his head meeting Chris' gaze. He wasn't sure what he was asking but whatever he needed he was down for whatever. Chris raked his fingers through Mike's hair and noticing for the first time ever how concerned he looked. Chris smiled apologetically.

"I'm sorry Mike."

"It's okay. Just know that I'll always be here for you if you need me."

"Thanks. It means a lot." The kid flashed him a warm smile that made Chris smile in return. "So…are you leaving anytime soon?"

"Well…I'm in no hurry to get home if that's what you mean. It's not exactly entertaining being at home alone."

"Ahh…well…if you don't have any plans, I could really use a smiling face around me for the next day or two. The interview isn't quite over according to Bret but I wish him the best of luck getting Shawn to show up tomorrow. But in the event Shawn decides to finish it up, I'll need a friend around."

"You really didn't have to ask," he grinned. "Of course I'll hang around." Mike rolled off of him then grabbed his keys jingling them at the door. "Come on blondie! Let's go!"

"Go? Go where?"

"Food! I'm starving! I've been waiting all day to eat and now that you're finally back…"

"Alright, alright. Gee. So demanding." He quickly scurried to the door not really caring that his pants were probably badly wrinkled now. He smiled as a very enthusiastic Mike led him out the door.

* * *

**AN: Most of you have read part one which is 'The Deal' but if you haven't I think you should. The reason is because what happened in part one will continue to pop up in this one from time to time and it will effect the ending of this one. This is the official sequel to the 'The Deal' which means all of the other couples or friends will be making their debut soon and with good reason. I know a lot of you are probably agreeing with JBL but you'd have to understand what he went through with Shawn in order to understand their love. The same thing goes for Hunter, Jeff, Adam, Randy, Mark...all of them will end up in this soon and... things WILL get very ugly soon. Trust me. You know when it involves Shawn that means craziness, secrets and lots of angst. Hope you enjoyed the update!**


	15. Restlessness

Jeff pulled his truck to the nearest Sonic and purchased ice cream cones for both him and Shawn. Shawn protested getting anything but Jeff insisted that he eat some with hopes that it would eventually cheer him up. They ate in silence with Jeff chancing glances at Shawn every now and then. After several long minutes of silence Jeff decided to question the blonde.

"Shawn? Sweets I know you've had a rough day but if you want to talk about it, I'm here for you. You know I'd never tell – not even Hunter if you don't want me too."

Shawn quickly ate the last bit of his cone before smiling apologetically at Jeff. "I'm sorry I was being a big baby. I just…So much…I didn't expect…Hell Jeff I don't even know where to begin."

Jeff's hand caressed the top of Shawn's bringing him a small feeling of comfort. "You can start at the beginning if you need to. I have all day and then some."

"I don't…think I can relive some of it again," he replied sadly. "I had to talk about things; stuff about Marty and me that I never thought I'd have to tell. That part of my life was so hard Jeff. When I lost Marty, it was as if I lost a part of me. Sure we may have made love once but he was still family to me."

"Oh Shawny I'm sorry."

"It's okay." His face suddenly contorted, showing signs of rage that almost made Jeff shudder. "Bret," he growled. "I hate him ya know? I hate him so much!"

"I uh…I'm not…trying to be a smartass Shawn but I don't think he hates you anymore—

"Which is complete bullshit!" he snapped. "How dare him! I can't believe…after all these years…he would just…"

"_Because you're the only person I ever loved and right now, at this very moment, I am still in love with you."_

Shawn's voice trailed off and then a choke. Jeff watched as he tried to fight back tears but it was just too much. Before he knew it Shawn was covering his face sobbing. "I'm sorry," he cried. "I'm sorry for being weak. I always knew…but I-I-I never imagined I'd give in so easily especially now that John and I…Oh God John. What am I going to do?"

"Oh Shawny…sweetie it's going to be alright," Jeff soothed. "You love John right?" Shawn nodded. "Well then you have nothing to worry about."

"But I let him touch me Jeff. I…I let him take over me. It was like…He made me relive the first time we made love and…"

"_Mn…Bret…Please…" Shawn whimpered. "I need…I want…"_

"_Anything to hear you sound like that again."_

"_More," he gasped. "Ahh…don't stop…" Faster and harder Bret moved inside of him drawing nothing but small cries that were music to his ears._

"_Shawn…you're so tight baby…I'm…I'm gonna cum soon."_

"_Do it. Cum for me."_

Shawn was now hyperventilating and it was scaring the hell out of Jeff. Jeff quickly snatched Shawn's hands away from his face. "Shawn? Baby _breathe_! I need you to breathe," Jeff said, panic rising in his voice by the second. He shook Shawn a little until he finally coughed and then folded himself into Jeff. "There there," Jeff whispered. "It's alright. Its gonna be alright." Jeff just held Shawn while he wept softly until he finally tired himself out.

An hour later Shawn was sound asleep his head now resting in Jeff's lap. Jeff decided now was the perfect time to start figuring out where to take Shawn because it was pretty obvious that he could not be left alone for too long. Jeff pulled out his cell and dialed the only other number besides Hunter's who could possibly be of some assistance. _Please pick up… Please…_

"Hello?"

"Oh thank God Mark!"

"Jeff?"

"Yeah it's me and please tell me you got a minute."

"Yeah. What's up?"

"Mark it's Shawn. He…he's not doing too well."

"Oh fuck. I just know Layfield—

"No it's not Layfield this time and before you ask, no. It's not my Hunty. To be honest big guy I have no idea who to blame right now except Bret."

"Bret? As in Bret _Hart?_"

"Yeah."

"Why is Shawn stressing about him? I thought Jibble took care of it?"

"Am I the only one who was listening to Chris brag about his new Highlight Reel special a few weeks ago?"

Mark laughed. "Probably. So what's up? What has Chris done to Shawn now?"

"Shawn has been stuck in a small room all day at corporate doing an interview with Chris and Bret Hart." Mark was silent and for a minute Jeff thought he'd hung up the phone. Finally he heard Mark curse. "Mark?"

"You're pulling my leg. _Tell me_ you're pulling my leg."

"I'm not kidding Mark," Jeff hissed.

"Why are you whispering?" Mark asked. "Is Hunter around?"

"No and I'm talking low because I don't want to wake Shawn until I can get him someplace where he can relax. He was freaking out earlier."

"Really?"

"Oh yeah and from what I've seen, it's not looking too good for JBL."

"What do you mean?"

"Well…" Jeff glanced down at the sleeping man half wishing he could help relieve some of the pain. Even in his sleep Shawn looked disturbed but at least he couldn't harm himself.

"Jeff? Talk to me. You're starting to scare me."

"Mark I'm scared for Shawn. He…I caught him and Bret locked in a kiss that could rival me and Hunter's. It was a lover's kiss and boy was Bret all over him."

"_What_?!"

"I know and what's worse Shawn said Bret made him relive…fuck," Jeff muttered.

"What? What _now_!?"

"I don't think I was supposed to say anything."

"Who am I gone tell Jeffrey?"

"I…I know but…you don't understand. You didn't see him…you didn't…he was literally freaking out."

"Oh I wouldn't doubt it. You forget I was there when they uh…broke up so to speak."

"Then you understand why he doesn't need to be left alone."

"You're right which is why you're going to take him straight to Layfield."

"But Shawn's afraid. He's too freaked out to see John and if you would have seen that kiss he shared with Bret, you'd understand."

"I _do_ understand Jeff. I understand more than you think. Trust me. Take him home to John."

"But—

"On second thought, Shawn's stubborn. He might not go."

"So what now?"

Mark was silent for a moment then he spoke up again. "First you need to call both John and Hunter…"

**~*~*~**

Chris hung up his phone and just stared at it in confusion. He and Mike were just now leaving the restaurant. His phone rang as soon as he reached his car. He started not to answer it since it was Hunter but something told him to answer it.

"Chris? Something wrong?"

Chris looked up in total confusion. "I have no idea."

"So what did big nosed want?"

"We have to go pick him up. He didn't say why but he said it was important. He even said "please"."

"Oh well…I guess we should get going before he starts blowing up your phone."

Chris nodded. "Yeah. Let's go."

**-xx-**

Bret did not go straight back to his room. He couldn't because he knew he'd go crazy staring at the walls. He decided instead that a drive would be better. He drove around the area for at least an hour until he had to stop and refill his tank. Afterwards he finally went back to his room only to stand outside the door. He wasn't even in the room and already flashbacks from the interview were tearing away at his brain.

"_Bret?"_

"_Hn?" Shawn looked up meeting Bret's eyes. _

"_Thank you," he whispered._

_Bret caressed his cheek with the back of his hand, Shawn's smooth skin sending sparks through his body. He bent his head planting a kiss on his forehead. "You're welcome. God you're so pretty," Bret breathed. He hadn't meant to say it but it was the truth and for reasons unknown he didn't care if Shawn knew how he really felt right now. He still considered Shawn his friend, but he also thought Shawn was pretty in a friendly sort of way…or at least that's what he kept telling himself. _

"_Someone else told me I was pretty. Coming from him I thought it was disgusting but when I hear you say it…I almost believe it."_

"_Oh but you are," he said soothingly. "If you weren't so pretty then I wouldn't be doing things I shouldn't do like…like kissing you all the time."_

"_Who said you shouldn't?"_

Bret closed his eyes and when he did the image of himself kissing Shawn on that plane played out like a movie in his brain making him feel all kinds of longing for Shawn. He leaned against the door and felt like crying. He was starting to wish he never did the interview. _I wouldn't be feeling this way if I would have just continued to hate Shawn by not showing up…_ But he knew it was all in his head. He forced himself not to watch Monday Night Raw after Shawn made his return in 2002. He didn't watch because somehow he just knew it would hurt. He made the mistake by watching him one Monday night. He happened to be in a feud with Cena against Rated RKO and he wanted to just cry. Shawn was so beautiful. He was smiling and the way Cena looked at him…he knew Cena had fallen victim to his perfect smile and those soulful eyes. Bret could remember just staring at the screen, his eyes refusing to look away until his wife turned the TV. A part of him wanted to yell at her for doing it but he caught himself. You hate Shawn remember?

He had asked himself that question that night only he couldn't answer it without feeling like it was a lie and today, he found out that it truly was a lie. He never hated Shawn. The ugly truth was that he actually hated himself for ever letting him go in the first place and now he was paying for it. Shawn was in a stable relationship with Layfield and seemed to care so much about him. _But if he loves John so much then why did he give into me? _That question was tearing a hole through Bret…so much so that he now needed a friend to talk to. _But I don't have any friends. My best friends are now gone, living it up in heaven where I'd gladly follow at this point but I'm not ready to die just yet. _Bret sighed. The only person that was coming to mind was Chris but would Chris be willing to talk with him considering his strong ties with Shawn? _Only one way to find out…_

***~*~***

"Jeff are you _sure_ I can stay here for the night?" Shawn was sitting on the edge of the bed looking slightly uneasy.

Jeff patted his friend's back reassuringly. "Of course. Hunter and I are going to be out late tonight anyway. We may or may not make it back in," he said with a wink knowing full well he'd be staying in a really expensive suite before the night was over.

"Okay. Thanks. Make sure you tell Hunter thanks too. I'm sorry for being an inconvenience. I just…don't know how to face John right now."

Jeff leaned over and kissed Shawn's cheek before starting for the door. "Don't worry about it. Hunter and I are cool. Trust me. Now you go get a shower…whatever you need to do to relax. I have some brand new boxers that are still in the pack that you can put on. Feel free to use any of the shower gel…whatever's mine is yours. I'm sure Hunter feels the same way," he said with a grin.

"Thanks Jeff. I owe you one."

"That you do love. Well…I gotta go meet Hunter. Call me if you need anything alright?"

"Alright. Later kid." Jeff closed the door and let out a breath he never knew he'd been holding._ I hope this does not backfire _he thought before hurrying off to get Hunter before Chris could do him in.

***~~*~~***

"Look Hunter, stop asking so many damn questions!" Chris snapped. He closed the door behind him then plopped down on the bed next to Mike. Hunter was pacing around the room like a mad cat as if it was going to make Chris talk. "Dammit Hunter stop pacing! Sit down some where," Chris yelled.

Hunter rolled his eyes before dropping in one of the small room chairs near the door. "I'm sitting now talk. What's going on with Shawn?"

"I already told you what happened."

"But there's got to be more to it than that!" he snapped. "I've known Shawn a lot longer than you and he's always been good at hiding his feelings. I mean come on. You saw how he hid his love for JBL."

"That was different Hunter. Bret was his first…well…I guess you could say Bret was his first love and the way they described it, it seems like they were destined to become lovers."

Hunter frowned. "Oh really?"

Chris raised a brow. "You aren't…jealous are you?"

Hunter merely shrugged. "Of what? Bret's a lying little shit. He's not and never will be worthy of Shawn."

"I'm sure he feels the same way about you," Chris grumbled.

"Look you. You tell that conniving little shit that if he wants to speak of me to do it in my face."

"I'm not telling him anything. You find him and work it – Oh thank God!"

Jeff closed the door and practically ran to Hunter dropping down in his lap. "Oh man…my brain hurts," he groaned.

Hunter kissed the top of his head holding him tightly. "I've missed my baby. So how's everything?"

Jeff cut his eyes towards Chris and frowned. "What did you do to him?" Jeff asked. "Why did you make him sit through that?"

"Through what?" Chris asked. "I didn't _make_ him do anything. He _chose_ to stay."

"And listen to Bret tell the world about the first time they made love?"

"_WHAT?!_" Hunter yelled.

"Now…now wait a second," Chris stammered. "I had _nothing_ to do with that. Blame Bret. Bret made him stay."

"Bret made him stay? How?" Hunter asked. "Just how the _fuck_—

"I…" Chris hesitated to speak but the glares from Jeff and Hunter were starting to scare him. He sighed. "He uh…He kind of…forced himself onto Shawn. You know…whispering things in his ear, touching him—

"Touching him?!" Hunter exclaimed. "I could just—

"Shut it Hunter!" Chris snapped. "You wanted to know so now I'm telling you. It uh…kind of went something like this. Shawn ran to the door. Bret grabbed him from behind. Caressed him. Told him that he loved him. Used the whole story of them making love for the first time to get his attention."

"And it worked like a charm," Jeff added. "When I saw them kissing outside headquarters—

"They were KISSING?!" Hunter exclaimed.

"Yes baby they were kissing but…I don't know how to explain it," Jeff added. "Shawn just seemed so…helpless. And when I picked him up…he was a wreck guys. Hyperventilating…just freaking out. God. I thought I'd seen it all the night JBL got hurt but Bret's got Shawn ready to check into Ravenwood or somewhere."

"That doesn't surprise me," Hunter added. "Chris how could you?"

"For the last fucking time, how was I supposed to know Bret would profess his undying love for Shawn? I thought the two _hated_ each other but apparently that's not the case," he spat. "And stop talking like Shawn's nuts or something," he growled at Jeff. "If you knew…if only you knew _half_ the shit he told me today you'd understand why Bret's so determined to get him back. I'm not saying it's right but I'm not saying it's wrong either. I think Bret's truly sorry for what he did to Shawn and I believe he really does love him. The way they interacted…it was as if they never stopped loving each other. And this might not be what you want to hear but I'm going to say it anyway. If it's meant to be it will be. You of all people should be able to relate Hunter."

Hunter just glared at Chris. "Did you _really_ have to go there?"

"Well you asked for it and anyway don't you have somewhere to be?" he asked irritably. He was ready to call it a day and maybe curl up with his friend Mike for some shut eye.

"Nope. Not really," Hunter shrugged.

"Well I have stuff to do like gather myself for part two of this insane interview in morning."

Hunter shrugged. "Not our fault you opened a can of worms. And anyway, I think you should—

There was a knock at the door that made everyone freeze. Chris had the most confused look on his face and so did Mike. Chris turned to Mike. "Did you invite someone over?" he whispered.

Mike shook his head. "I don't have any other friends." There were knocks again, this time much louder.

"Eh…coming," Chris mumbled. As he started for the door, he looked over at Jeff and Hunter who were both denying having called anyone else. With a sigh Chris opened the door and just froze. Mike's jaw dropped as well which earned him curious glances from Hunter and Jeff, both who were sitting too far away from the door to see anything.

"Hey Chris. I hope this isn't a bad time but I really need to talk with someone. You're the only person who might actually listen."

Chris was so at a loss for words that all he could manage was a nod. But before Bret could push himself past Chris, two other people appeared behind him, towering over him and shooting daggers with their eyes. Bret instantly felt a wave of anger come over him and he was sure the other felt the same.

"Bret."

"Hunter," he growled.

"You guys…" Chris started but he was cut off by Hunter.

"I should rip you apart right now!" he seethed.

"Let's see you try it," Bret smirked. Chris just stood between both men nervously not daring to breath. Just when he thought the day couldn't get any worse it had and now he was stuck between two guys who hated each other for real. _Looks like I'm in for one hell of an evening…_

**~*~*~**

Shawn flicked the tele off and just curled up on the bed staring at the wall. He was tired, his head hurt, and he missed the warmth of John's body. Try as he might to fall back asleep, nothing was working. Every time he'd shut his eyes, he'd see Bret's face staring back at him as if he cared and it made Shawn want to throw up. He hated this feeling of betrayal especially since John was so innocent. People looked at him and saw this tough, Texas exterior but none of them knew the _real_ John. It took his closest friends forever to understand their relationship but after a while they got used to it.

Shawn loved John with all his heart. He loved waking up next to him each day reassuring him that he was worth loving and he was. John was actually a nervous wreck around Shawn but in a cute, school boy way. He still wasn't quite used to the way Shawn treated him and would often times feel sad about their past but Shawn would always reassure him that it was okay. Shawn smiled clutching his pillow tighter. He could remember the first time they made love and how nervous John was. He was blushing all over the place trying to push him away but Shawn wouldn't let up. He wanted John so badly and he was going to have him.

"_Oh God…Shawn please," he moaned. "Please don't…you don't know what you're doing," he breathed. John reached up to push Shawn off of him, but Shawn grabbed both his hands, pinning them above his head. He licked all around John's neck until he reached his earlobe. He nipped it playfully drawing a slight hiss from John._

"_John I want you," he whispered. "I want you so badly and now that I've tasted you, I got to have more." Shawn took his earlobe into his mouth sucking and biting it playfully. _

_"Mmm…Shawn…please…" John moaned. "Don't…"_

"_God John, I'm on fire for you right now," he whispered. "You moan like that one more time and I might lose it." Shawn bit into his neck playfully all the while grinding his hips against John letting him feel his apparent erection. "Feel it? I want you…fuck I want you," he panted. _

_Shawn released John's arms and started planting a trail of tiny wet kisses down his body while his hands moved to play with John's nipples. He was pleasantly surprised to find them fully erect. He pinched them hard making John cry out. His tongue came out to play, as he licked the rest of his way down John's body, dipping in and out of John's belly button playfully. The larger man arched his back, whimpering softly in a vain attempt to mask his pleasure but Shawn knew better. When he reached the waistband of John's pants, he wasted no time at all unfastening them only to yank them off impatiently. _

_John gasped when he felt the cool air hit his erection but that was nothing compared to the warmth that engulfed him a second later. "Fuck Shawn!" he breathed. "I…Oh God!" John gripped the comforter for support as Shawn sucked on him; his head moving slowly up and down over his shaft._

Shawn heard a soft knock on his door knocking him out of his thoughts. He stared at the door for several seconds before it dawned on him that he was technically staying in someone else's room. _Oh, maybe it's Jeff checking up on me…_ Shawn rolled off the bed, ran to the door and flung it open.

"Jeff I…_John_?" he whispered.

* * *

_**AN:** Will update again soon. Got a new story eating at my brain and I am trying to forget about it. We'll how long that lasts. Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. You know who you are. Sometimes I forget to log in and check the reviews so don't think I'm ignoring you. A lot of you are reading stories on my other account so I usually respond to that one more. And speaking of....Some of you are reading "The HBKronicles" and have made requests. Don't think I'm ignoring you. Eventually I'll get to your request. It just takes me a long time because I have several fics I'm working on. IE: **"The HBKronicles"**, **"Everybody Wants Shawn"**, **"My Obsession"**, **"Wrestling Gods"**, and this one. Let's not forget about that stupid novel that's giving me hell right now. So I promise to get to your request unless I absolutly hate the pairing. Sorry. If I can't make it work I won't use it. Now review if you want and be on the lookout for another update soon. **~Nef**_


	16. A Heartbreaking Decision

"Chris move so I can kill that son-of-a-bitch!" Hunter growled. He tried to push himself past Chris but Jeff and Mike held him back. "Let me go! Let me go so I can put this lying—

"Oh come off it big nose," Bret snapped. "You're one to talk. Chris, I'm sorry. Next time I'll call. I should get going since the atmosphere here stinks."

"Oh no you don't asshole," Hunter growled. "You and I need to talk."

"I have nothing to say to you. Chris, I'll call you later."

"Just what I figured," Hunter scowled. "It's just like you to run away so go. Just put your tail between your legs and run away like a lost puppy. It's the only thing you're good at anyway."

That got Bret's attention. He quickly pushed his way through the door, shoving Chris to the side so he was now standing toe to toe with Hunter. "Listen here you son-of-a-bitch—

"No, _you_ listen," Hunter growled. "What the _hell_ makes you think you can just walk back into Shawn's life and continue on as if nothing happened?"

"And who are you to judge me about it?" Bret seethed. "The way I see it, you're just as much responsible for what happened years ago as I am so fuck you. I'll do what I want, when I want and what I want is my Shawny back."

The temperature in the room had risen to the melting point and for a moment Chris wondered if he should call security. He wasn't about to put himself in harm's way and he really wished that Hunter would just back off if only to keep the peace. Fat chance of that happening though.

"There ain't no way in _hell_ you're getting him back. I'll see to it personally."

"Like you did 12 years ago?" Bret challenged. "I'd like to see you try but I'm warning you. It won't be so easy this time around. 12 years ago I was an insecure bastard and didn't realize what a prize I had but after seeing him today you'll have to kill me to keep me from fighting for him."

"Maybe I'll take you up on that," Hunter smirked.

"Okay, okay guys. Enough. Not here. You want to fight, do it somewhere else but I'll have no more of it!" Chris snapped. "I'm tired, I have a fucking headache and the two of you aren't helping. Hunter, shouldn't you be somewhere else?" Chris asked, glaring at him as if daring him to say no but Hunter ignored his anger.

"Where am I going to go?" Hunter asked, his eyes showing a hint of sarcasm. "Certainly not to my room. As you know, it's currently occupied – thanks to Bret of course."

"What the hell are you talking about Hunter?" Bret asked.

"Hunter," Chris warned. "Don't. Let it go."

"Why should I? It's his fault Shawn's all fucked up right now anyway. Let's just hope John's not too upset about what happened today."

"Wait what?" Bret asked his face twisted in confusion. "What's wrong with Shawn?"

"Nothing," Chris answered quickly. "Now Hunter—

"Shawn's losing it that's what," Hunter answered once again ignoring Chris. "He's back in me and Jeff's room with John because he was too scared to go to John on his own. He was freaking out because of your sudden interest in him again. You have no idea what Shawn went through with John and I'll be damned if you're going to tear them apart."

"I wasn't…I'm not trying to tear them apart!" Bret snapped irritably. "I just…I can't help what I feel Hunter. I'm prepared to leave my wife and kids for him. That's how much I love him."

"Yeah well no way. There's just no way. Whose to say you're not going to up and leave him again the next time your scary ass feels threatened?"

"I'm not that—

"Bullshit. Do I need to call Kevin and ask him to remind—

"Look, save it for the camera guys!" Chris snapped. Both Bret and Hunter opened their mouths to speak but Chris immediately cut them off. "Shut it! I don't wanna hear it. You got something you need to say, say it in front of the camera tomorrow. You know as well as I know Hunter that there's a chance Shawn might not even show up and according to my calculations, we should be nearing the debut of the Kliq anyway. So save it for tomorrow!"

Everyone in the room fell into an awkward silence though Chris felt hardly anything at all besides massive anger. He was tired and really wanted to go to bed just to put this crazy day behind him but from the looks of it he would have to beat everyone out or deal with it. Chris sighed. _I wonder how Shawn is doing… I just hope John understands that Shawn still loves him. I don't think I can live with myself if they break up…_

**~*~*~**

"John?"

"It's just me kitten," he said smiling weakly. John could tell by the look on Shawn's face that he was surprised to see him. More than that though, the weariness and discomfort seemed to outshine his shock which hurt John's heart. He hated seeing Shawn like this. The last time Shawn looked this out of it was the night John rescued him after his rape. Of course John didn't see it that way. To this day he still couldn't think of his finding Shawn as a type of "rescue" and was so ashamed of himself about it that he refused to forgive himself for it. Shawn on the other hand, did not blame John for it and refused to hear any apologies about it.

John reached out to cup the side of Shawn's face. His kitten kissed the palm of his hand, looking up at him with eyes filled with sadness. John just wanted to cry right then and there. Shawn was hurting. Shawn was really hurting and it was all John's fault. He knew the interview would be bad but a part of him couldn't help but wonder how he'd stand against a threat like Bret Hart.

John didn't even realize he was being pulled into the room. He had started to cry the moment he locked eyes with Shawn. Even though he had no idea what happened during the interview, he seemed to be able to feel Shawn's pain anyway and it was tearing a hole in him. John just dropped to his knees, wrapping his arms around Shawn's waist. "Oh God Shawn…I'm so sorry," he sobbed. He pressed his face to Shawn's body sobbing while Shawn just held him tightly, too choked up to speak. "I made you do this. I forced you…kitten please…please forgive me…"

Shawn kissed the top of his head, his own tears burning his eyes. "Don't…you did nothing wrong," he managed.

John shook his head, coughing. "I…I did…I made you…He still loves you—

"John don't—

"And how could he not?" John reached up, cupping Shawn's face pulling him to the floor. "God Shawn…you're so perfect," he choked. "I should have known he'd still love you."

Shawn shook his head. "No I'm not. I'm…I'm nowhere near…you have _no_ idea…"

"You kissed him back Shawn."

Shawn shook his head furiously. "No…no John it wasn't…"

"It's okay," John said softly, caressing Shawn's cheek. "I know what happened kitten."

"Then you know that I'm not perfect if I let him…" Shawn choked back a sob. "I don't know what happened John, but I don't want to be with Bret. I don't… I want _you_," he pleaded.

John somehow forced himself to smile despite the tears that were pouring out of his eyes now. "Kitten, don't let your promise to make me happy keep you from being happy."

"_I just…I couldn't do it John. I couldn't leave you. I know I promised you but I also promised to make you happy. I feel like I can do that if you'd just let me…"_

Shawn knew where this was going and he wasn't about to hear it. Not now. Not ever. He couldn't – _wouldn't_ let John do this to him. "No." He shook his head furiously, choking back sobs.

"Shawn—

"I'm not leaving you!" he cried. "I love you!"

"But you still have feelings for Bret. Don't you see Shawn?"

"See what?" he cried.

"You're in denial Shawn. I…as much as I hate it, Bret loves you in a way that I can't."

"But you love me just fine!" Shawn scrambled to his feet pulling away from John.

"Kitten I only want what's best for you." He too scrambled to his feet and followed Shawn towards the bed. He placed a hand on the blonde's shoulder but Shawn snatched it away. John sighed. _I knew he wouldn't listen but it's for the best… "_Shawn, I just want you to be happy love…you know, the way you made me happy."

Shawn choked back another sob as he spun around angrily to face his boyfriend. "You know, you're starting to sound like a few other people who thought they knew what was best for me," he said coldly.

"But Shawn—

"You're no better than Hunter or Chris if that's the excuse you're feeding me." Shawn closed the gap between him and John staring up at him defiantly with tear stained eyes. "I love you and I _refuse_ to leave you. We're just starting our lives together and I'm not about to let Bret ruin it for us."

"But you _love_ him," John cried. "You can't move on with me if you're in love with someone else!"

"That's not fair and you know it! I…I don't know how I feel about Bret alright? God… He…he pisses me off!" Shawn screamed. "He just…out of nowhere told me that he loved me today but so what? You think I should just completely forget about what I'm building with you just to start over with someone who may have let old feelings get the best of him today?

"Well—

"No John. No. I…I admit to having kissed him but it wasn't…He caught me off guard. But all this time I've been lying up in this room tonight, the only person I could think about was you John. Y-O-U…and how much I've missed you."

John was stunned. "Shawn—

"I thought about how much I missed your comforting arms around me and…and how cute you are when I make love to you," he whispered. John felt all his defenses shatter completely with those words. Shawn pressed his lips to John's. "I love you," he murmured. "I love you so much."

John helplessly allowed Shawn's tongue to enter his cavern, his emotion driven kiss making his head spin. All he could do was shudder each time he felt his kitten's fingers brush his body as they worked slowly to undo the buttons on his shirt. Shawn slid the shirt off of John's shoulders then quickly went to work undoing his pants.

"Shawn…you don't…" But he was cut off when Shawn suddenly pushed him backwards onto the bed. Shawn wasted no time tugging his pants off before crawling on top of him. "Kit- Ahhh!"

Shawn grinded his hips against John letting their erections touch.

"Ahh…Shawn don't… Ahhh please…" John now had the most painful erection and it was only getting worse because of the friction between them. "Shawn…"

"You want relief baby?" Shawn asked seductively, grinding harder against him, eliciting a loud cry from his love.

"Oh fuck please! Shawn I—

Shawn sucked hard on his neck while his hands wandered down his sides and in between his legs. "Tell me what you want."

"I…I want…Oh _God_…" Shawn's fingers were teasing the head of his cock making him twitch and moan with desire.

"Tell me John. What do you want baby?" he whispered, his sexy purr driving John into madness.

"Please…fuck kitten I…you…t-t-t-touch me," he pleaded.

"Mn…I love hearing you beg," Shawn teased. "So hot…" Shawn licked his way down John's body stopping momentarily to suck both nipples raw. John moaned the sweetest moan when Shawn bit him, making him shudder. The blonde purposely licked all around his throbbing cock until John was practically tearing at the sheets. Shawn licked his lips before taking John deep in his mouth all the way to the back of his throat.

"OH FUCK!" John screamed. His hips thrust forward and he almost exploded right then but Shawn wouldn't let him.

"Not yet baby."

"Ahhh…Shawny…kitten…please…," he moaned. "You're too wet and hot…Ahh fuck!" Shawn's tongue was teasing his slit so much that he couldn't stop cum from leaking through. "Ohhh….kitten…no more…I need…" Shawn's mouth moved up and down slowly over is shaft purposely prolonging John's relief.

"Tell me you love me John."

"I…fuck I love you!" he screamed. Shawn smiled as his hand moved to cup John's balls giving them a hard squeeze. John gripped the sheets even tighter begging Shawn to let him cum.

"Cum for me now John." Shawn covered him completely, holding him down while he released in his mouth. Shawn licked his lips.

"Mn…John you tasted sweet." John blushed, looking away and Shawn just smiled. He loved John so much and he could never get enough of sweet, innocent John. His blushing and helplessness was just so cute. Shawn crawled on top of him parting his legs in the process. "Aww…my baby's so sweet. You're blushing again."

John looked up at him and Shawn just wanted to melt. Those beautiful, soulful orbs of his were just filled with love. Shawn nipped at his lips. "I love you…so much John. I'll never give up on us." Shawn thrust inside of him hard making him scream from a mixture of pleasure and pain. "That's it John. Scream for me baby." _My baby…my sweet innocent John…_ Shawn moved in and out of him slowly while John clung to him tightly, moaning his name with every thrust.

"So good John…So tight baby…" Shawn moved a little bit faster, his breathing becoming shorter with each thrust. John's muscles fit beautifully around his cock and he felt himself starting to cum. "Mn…John…I'm about to cum you're so fucking good."

John kissed his lips. "Cum kitten. Cum for me baby." John's warm breath on his ear was all it took. Shawn's body shuddered and he exploded inside of John moaning his name. John just held him close after Shawn collapsed, his messy blond hair falling like a blanket over John's chest. Shawn rose up just enough to kiss his lips then settled himself in his favorite place. He breathed in John's scent, the only scent that could bring him absolute comfort. He kissed John's neck. "Sweetheart I love you…so much. Don't ever think that I don't."

John tangled his fingers in Shawn's hair, eliciting the lovely purrs he adored so much until his kitten finally drifted off to sleep. John lay awake for a while because so much was weighing heavily on his brain. Thoughts of Shawn and Bret had him rethinking everything about his decision to be with Shawn. He knew he loved Shawn. He'd known it the night he allowed Shawn to crawl in his lap but he didn't want to believe it. It wasn't until he was about to lose him forever that it finally hit him like his very on Clothesline from Hell…

_John and Shawn sat inside the limo in an awkward silence. It was almost time for their match, but they were having to wait what seemed like forever before they could enter the arena and exit the limo. The uncomfortable tension didn't help matters either. Shawn kept his face turned towards his window, staring out of it in an attempt to ignore the tension. John on the other hand, couldn't stop himself from watching the blonde. All week he began dreading this day but he couldn't – wouldn't – go back on his word. He loved and appreciated Shawn too much to fail him now but he had to admit that it hurt. __**This sucks. This really, truly, fucking sucks. **__John sighed before turning his attention to a window too. _

"_I enjoyed working with you, ya know?" Shawn's soft, gruff voice broke the silence. John turned towards him shocked that he even opened his mouth to say anything. Both had spent the majority of the evening ignoring one another until the point of madness. Shawn still had his face towards the window but John knew it was for the best. John forced a small chuckle._

"_I…I wouldn't have thought as much but I'll take your word for it kitten." Kitten. John bit his lip. He hadn't meant to say it but he did and now he wished he'd never said anything at all. After tonight, there would be no more kitten. _

"_It's been…a journey," Shawn managed. "A hell of a journey for us both but in the end, I think it did some good." He turned to John smiling for the first time all night. He reached over and placed his hand inside John's. "You gave me something that none of my other friends have been able to do so far." John squeezed his hand staring back at him with a confused look on his face._

"_I…Shawn I…what could you have possibly gained from hanging around a grouch like me?" _

"_You doubt yourself too much John. You're really a good person but I think you try to hide it to keep people at a distance. I…don't really understand it since I know you to be a good man but you don't have to change who you are on account of my feeble observations." He squeezed John's hand again before pulling away, turning back towards the window. John's heart began pounding rapidly, not to mention he was starting to sweat. __**God, what do I do? Please tell me what to do before it's too late!**__ John glanced over at the blonde again, biting down on his lip. __**So much has happened between the two of us but I can't… **__John's music hit and he could feel the limousine making its way into the arena. __**Oh God… **_

_John's palms were starting to sweat and he knew it was almost time. This would be the last time Shawn Michaels would ever be under his employment; under his watchful eye. This would also be the last time Shawn ever rode in a limousine with him. John glanced towards Shawn who still hadn't moved an inch. The crowd roared with a mixture of cheers and jeers letting him know that they were finally inside the arena. The vehicle slowed into a stop then the click of a latch was heard. __**The driver…**__ John watched as Shawn readied himself to exit the vehicle and then it hit him._

"_Shawn wait!" he breathed. The blonde's head quickly turned, his intense gaze lighting a fire in John that he wished was long gone. Palms sweating, heart pounding, he willed himself forward enough to just barely touch Shawn's lips with his own. "I love you," he whispered just as the door suddenly opened up. _

John held tighter to Shawn at the thought. That night he'd almost lost Shawn forever. His contract was up and he had one final job to do and that was to win him the belt from John Cena. He was doing it to make him happy but that's not what John really wanted. After losing the match to Cena, he didn't think twice about that fucking piece of gold. That's because the real gold had already left the arena and walked out of his life for good – or so he thought. John could remember it just like it was yesterday. He could remember all the pain he felt. It was like he had no reason to live anymore because the one thing that mattered most in his life was gone for good. John hadn't been that sad since his best friend moved away. Ron… But then again, he couldn't really remember the pain. It was the same way with his ex girl Rene. He was sure he loved her to death but nothing – not a thing could compare to the grief he felt when he thought Shawn was gone for good. _Shawn made me feel like I was worth loving even though I hated myself. I didn't deserve him but he stayed by me, even after I got my ass kicked. So loving…caring…so fucking perfect and yet…_

John hated doubting Shawn's love for him and after tonight he couldn't but despite Shawn's argument he still felt like there was still love for Bret. Maybe not as much as it used to be, but it was still enough to ruin them. A part of John really wanted to wipe Bret out with a semi truck forever. Bret obviously hurt Shawn when they were together, so much so that Shawn had difficulty in just about every relationship following it. On the other hand, there was no such thing as a perfect relationship so Bret must have been something special. Shawn hated talking about him which meant there were still some deep rooted feelings that could only come from real love. So John knew. If Bret said he still loved Shawn then maybe Shawn had a moment of weakness. True love never dies which meant Bret was able to reach deep in his heart to remind him of their love. Either way John knew Bret was going to be a problem.

Just a few months ago John never would have dreamed he would be in a situation like this. Everyone hated him – including Shawn – so he had nothing to worry about right? Wrong! Shawn turned out to be the exception to every fucking rule in the book and because of this, John found himself falling in love for the first time in a long time. He never thought another day would come when he'd have to choose between his happiness and the happiness of someone else. He never thought in a million years that he'd be lying in bed with a sexy blond contemplating the act of sacrificing his own future just to give someone else the ultimate happiness. He never thought it and yet here he was…lying in bed with his perfect love…and a seriously heart-wrenching decision to make. He forced himself to swallow his sobs to keep from waking Shawn. _You made the choice for me once and now it's high time I return the favor. I love you kitten…so much…_

John somehow managed to unhook his leg from Shawn's and slide his body from underneath him. Shawn muttered something that sounded like "John" and shifted a bit. For a moment John just froze thinking that he'd woke him up but Shawn only curled up like he always did and fell back asleep. John had to tear his eyes away before emotions got the best of him. He crept to the other side of the bed and grabbed his clothes. It was only semi dark because of the light seeping in from a crack in the bathroom door so he had little trouble dressing. John quietly grabbed his keys, stuffing them on the inside of his jacket then he quietly moved towards the bed. Shawn was still sound asleep but John was happy to see that he wasn't stressed. In fact there were no signs of tension. Only a peaceful slumber highlighted by the angelic features of his face. John smiled. _Oh kitten… I just hope I'm doing the right thing… _He leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips.

"I love you Shawn…and I always will." John quietly headed towards the door and quickly left the room. He forced himself not to cry as he dialed the number. _Yes…Mark first and then…_

"Hello?" He picked up after three rings and John could tell he'd been sleeping.

"Mark it's me…John."

"What the hell man? What's wrong?" he asked groggily.

"I…I need you to do something for me. It's very, very important that you do it."

"Uh...alright," he answered reluctantly.

"It's about Shawn…"

**~**~**~**

"Alright. I can't take the silence anymore," Jeff grumbled. He stood to his feet and yawned loudly. "Baby, I'm tired. Let's just go back to the room and leave Bret alone."

"But I want to know what his deal is!"

"And I don't care what you want!" Jeff snapped. "Leave it alone Hunter. This is Shawn's problem not yours," he warned.

"But you were trying to help him," Hunter accused.

"Yeah but that's because he called me Hunter. You were there. Besides, I don't want a repeat of the last time. I won't have it. If you cross that line then I swear to God Hunter—

"Alright, alright fine!" he mumbled. "But you know as well as I know that John deserved it."

"Deserved what?" Bret asked. Hunter only scowled as he pushed his way past Bret towards the door. "Deserved what?" he asked again. "What did you do to old JBL?"

"The same thing I'm going to do to you if Shawn ends up heartbroken again." Hunter opened the door for Jeff pausing momentarily to bid them all a goodnight. "Good night Chris. I'll be in touch." With one last scowl at Bret, Hunter and Jeff were gone giving Chris a brief moment of relief anyway. Chris was hoping Bret would follow their lead but much to his dissatisfaction that would not be the case.

Bret suddenly turned to him and frowned. "What was he talking about Chris? What the heck happened to JBL?"

"I don't want to get into it Bret…at least not tonight," he added quickly when he saw the look on Bret's face. "Besides, that's really something you should talk with Shawn about."

"You know Shawn won't tell me. He hates me…well, for now anyway. So what happened? And how the hell did they end up hooking up anyway?"

Chris sighed. "It's a long story best left for another day." Mike yawned loudly which got Chris' attention. He'd forgotten all about Mike being in the room and couldn't help but smile when he saw how hard he was fighting to stay awake. Bret also suddenly yawned.

"Man…I'm about to drop dead any moment now. Chris, I'm sorry for….everything. I really wanted to talk with you but it can wait."

"It's okay. We'll talk. I promise but for now I think we both could do with a little—oh what now!" he groaned. Chris' phone was vibrating and without looking to see who it was he answered irritably. "What?!" he snapped. "Whoa…hey…Mark. I'm sorry. No…you have no idea. It's been….No, no. Hunter just left. Uh…later. We'll talk about it later. So what's—Oh you did huh? How is he?" Bret noticed that Chris was no longer angry and that his face was slowly draining of color. "Uh…right. 'Night Mark."

Chris' phone just fell to the floor and he didn't even bother to pick it up. Mike quickly rushed to his side and Chris just sort of folded into him. "Chris….Chris what's wrong?"

"Shawn…"

Bret grabbed Chris' shoulders. "What's wrong with Shawn?" he asked. "Come on Chris. Stop crying for a moment and tell me he's alright!"

"Alone…John…"

"John? What about John?!" Bret pressed.

"John's…leaving him…" Chris whispered. "John's…gone."

* * *

AN: Long delay but long chapter to make up for it. I attended another WWE House Show last Friday and had a great time which is why I haven't been online in almost a week. Hope you enjoyed the update. I hope I don't have too much longer to go with this one but who knows? Other updates are coming soon for "My Obsession", "Everybody Wants Shawn" and the Shawn OST's. Just...been sick lately and really haven't felt well enough to type let alone think. If I'm reading one of your stories, I'll eventually get around to catching up and if I owe you a requested pairing, I'll get around to it eventually as well.

**My Current Obsessions:**

1. _Despise_ by **vadg** - Read it. It's the best JBL/Shawn fic I have read on this site...possibly ever. I love this take on Shawn's 'deal' with Jibble. It's such a refreshing change from my version of the events and it only makes me love that couple even more.

2. _Secrets Uncover_ by **Randysdymond06** - I normally hate reading stories with OC's or stories that pair wrestlers with divas but this series was actually really good. Always some drama.

3. _Hidden Secrets, Diaries of the WWE Superstars_ by **Taker-took-my-Toys** - This is the funniest shit I've ever read. No lie. It gives Adnacia's Michael Cole/cupcake story a run for it's money. And if you haven't read the cupcake story, read it. It's on this profile. You WILL laugh.

4. _Hot One Shots_ by **Seraphalexiel** - A bunch of OSTs with lots of different pairings. Check it out.


	17. Chris' Breakdown

"Are you…Are you positive? John's really gone?"

Chris wiped his eyes. "Yea…yeah. I mean, why would Mark lie to me about something… God Bret... Shawn's going to freak! I gotta…"

"No, you can't," Mike soothed. "It's late. You're tired. Don't…we'll have to wait and deal with it in the morning."

"But Shawn—

"No…he's right," Bret answered. "As much as I want to storm over there to be with him, I can't. Shawn's probably sound asleep and it won't do to wake him with news like this. We'll just…have to wait and see how things are when he wakes up. In the meantime I need to run. Chris, I plan to be at the interview in the morning but I might be late. Just depends on what the morning has in store for us. I expect you to be a good friend and call me if you hear anything else."

Chris merely nodded, only half aware of what was being said. Soon there was the soft sound of the door closing and that's when Chris finally let it out. He just fell into Mike's arms sobbing. Mike held his friend tightly, tears streaming down his face as well. It hurt to see Chris so torn up like this, especially when he was always so confident. Right now though Chris couldn't look any weaker as if he didn't have a strong bone in his body.

"I'm sorry…Mike. I'm so…Shawn's going to…"

"Maybe he won't."

"Oh no. He will. I know he will. You weren't there that night Mike. You didn't see his face when he found JBL lying lifeless on the hood of that limo. He was…and then his face…the way he looked at me – at all of us. Disgust and I swore to myself that I'd never look at that face again but it's coming…God Mike I'm so stupid." Mike wrapped his arms tighter around Chris as he sobbed into his chest.

"It will be alright Chris. Please…Don't cry," Mike pleaded but he really had no idea what was going on in Chris' head…

_Hunter allowed Shawn to pound away at his chest until he finally broke down. "I hate you…I hate you all," he choked. Hunter wrapped his arms around Shawn bringing him close but Shawn violently pushed him away. He stumbled backwards a bit holding his hand out. "No…stay…away from me," he breathed._

"_But Shawn—_

"_I said SHUT UP!" he screamed. "I don't wanna hear anything you have to say. I fucking hate you!"_

"_Shawn we were only trying to—_

"_Trying to what Hunter? Help?" Shawn laughed a little. His laughed wasn't at all warm and fuzzy. Instead it came off as evil…mad even making the vey hairs on some of the guys arms stand. Shawn stumbled around in a circle looking at all of the guys. None of them would meet his gaze which made him laugh again. Shawn laughed and laughed as he tried to make some sense of it all but his laughter soon turned to tears when his eyes fell back on JBL's limo. He dropped to his knees and just sobbed…_

And it only got worse that night. Shawn continued to plead on John's behalf but no one was buying it. In fact they all laughed at him like he was crazy or something and it didn't help that one of Shawn's closest friends betrayed him; that friend being Chris himself…

"_What?" Hunter laughed. "Shawn, we were trying to protect you from that big oaf over there. I know there's a reason you two were together and after he let you get raped, I be damned if I was going to just sit there and let him get away with it. And I'm still kind of tripping over you right now. I can't believe you would give him the time of day, especially after that happened!"_

"_He's my boyfriend Hunter!" Shawn snapped._

"_I agree with Paul," Sean added. "I mean, he's not even your type Shawny. Besides, from what I hear he's a total creep. Treats you like shit and even knocked you around a couple of times."_

"_Wha…what? Who told you that? Was it Cena?" Shawn turned to face Cena who was frantically shaking his head._

"_No. Shawn I swear to God I never said anything. I…would never…I mean…"_

"_Don't blame Cena Shawn. It was me. I told Hunter about John."_

"_Chris?"_ _Chris pushed his way past Cena and so did Adam, who quickly grabbed the arm of his lover keeping his distance. Everyone else just watched as Chris approached the seething blonde. "Why Chris? Why did you tell Hunter? It wasn't your business to tell."_

"_Because I couldn't stand the sight of you being hurt anymore Shawn. You come to the arena with black eyes, whelps, and you even flinch now when people reach out to you—_

"_I WAS RAPED CHRIS! WHAT DID YOU FUCKING EXPECT?"_

"_You had bruises before you were raped Shawn," Cena added. Shawn's eyes were filling up with water again and while Cena felt bad for Shawn, he also felt he was obligated to voice the truth. "I know it's not my business Shawn but Chris is right. You came to the arena several times in severe pain. You even tried to drown yourself!"_

"_Shawn, you can't hide from the truth anymore," Chris said softly. "I love you – we all love you and everyone just has your best interest at heart. I for one can't stand to see you all bruised up."_

"_And I hate holding you in my arms and seeing you wince in pain," Cena added. _

"_Oh God, seriously?" Shawn screamed. "So all of this is because you guys have MY best interest at heart?"_

"_Yeah Shawn. I mean, I didn't figure they would go this far but for the most part, everyone out here's just trying to help."_

"_I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!" Shawn shouted. "I'M FINE! MY LIFE IS…IS MY LIFE AND I DON'T NEED YOU GUYS BUTTING INTO IT!"_

"_Obviously you do because you're stuck in a relationship—_

"_I'M NOT STUCK…in a relationship Chris. I am in one because I want to be!"_

"_That's a lie and you know it," Chris snapped. He got right in Shawn's face staring him down. "You can hit me…you can do whatever you want Shawn but since we're trying to get everything out in the open, how about you come clean with the real reason you're with JBL. Why don't you tell everyone the truth Shawn."_

"_Huh? What are you talking about?"_

"_Oh don't give me that!" Chris snapped. "Tell them all why you're really with JBL or I'll do it myself. I hate that things got a bit violent tonight but one can't help but feel he deserved it. He forced you into a relationship, beat you senseless and even let you get raped? That right there is a resume for an ass-whooping. Now tell them Shawn. You're not with JBL because you want to be so stop this fucking act!"_

"_Act? You…you think this is an act?" he asked incredulously. He looked around at the Kliq members and some of them shrugged in agreement. Even Hunter had a doubtful look on his face. "I…I don't believe this. I'm hurting right now. I'm hurting more than you can possibly imagine and the best argument you got against my relationship with John is that I'm acting? That I'm pretending to care for him?"_

"_It's got to be an act," Chris reasoned. "Why else would you take up for someone who threatened to let your ex lover die?"_

"I was so proud of what I did but I was wrong." Chris shook his head. "I can't…I can't face him Mike," he choked. "I can't bear to see him like that anymore. I'm…I've made up my mind. I'm going to cancel the interview." Chris allowed Mike to help him over to the bed. His legs barely made it and gave way just as he reached the bed. Mike crossed the room to kill the lights then crawled on the bed next to Chris. Chris pulled Mike against him holding him tightly from behind. "I'm so glad you're here," he whispered. "I don't think I could have handled being alone. My head…I can't stop myself from thinking about that night. God Mike…we were so cruel to him. And John…poor John…but Shawn loves him so much. It took us forever to understand it. Hell we barely understand it now but John's come so far… He's actually okay to be around. Oh Mike…"

"It's okay Chris. Don't…You can't keep beating yourself up about it. We don't know what's going to happen in a couple of hours not to mention Bret's still in the picture. If John left on behalf of Bret then maybe Bret has a strong enough hold over Shawn to reason with him. Or if not reason, at least calm him down. I don't think you have to worry too much because it's not entirely your fault. If anything it's Bret's fault. All of this – including the deal Shawn made with John to begin with."

"Yeah but Bret doesn't know about it."

"And I'm not saying you should tell him but if it comes down to it you just might have to burst his bubble."

"But Shawn didn't want him to know."

"But you know as well as I do that Bret's the reason for all of this. In fact, you could almost say he's the reason Shawn fell in love with John in the first place. Use it if you need to. You don't have to suffer all by yourself because it's not all you Chris."

"I…I'm hoping I won't have to. I really am cancelling the interview. I can't…This…In all of a few short hours those two had me in tears. I can't handle it anymore Mike. I can't… Do you blame me?"

Mike suddenly shifted, turning to him in the darkness. "No…I don't. You do what you feel is right Chris and I'll stand by your side. I promise." Mike leaned forward and kissed his forehead. "Get some sleep. We have lots to take care of in a few hours and I want you with your game face on." _Because something tells me he's going to need it…_

**~***~**

When Bret got back to his room, he wasted no time falling into bed. He was completely exhausted yet his mind refused to shut off just yet. Shawn. All he could think about was Shawn and how sad he was probably going to be when he got the news. A part of Bret wanted to celebrate his victory over John. With John's sudden departure it meant his job of winning Shawn over was going to be that much easier. On the other hand, a part of him couldn't help but feel a strong dislike towards John; so strong in fact that it made him want to hunt him down and beat the hell out of him for abandoning him.

If Chris or Shawn could hear his thoughts they'd probably call him a hypocrite, but Bret was far from it. When he left Shawn 12 years ago, he had a very good reason and hopefully Shawn would stick around for the other part of the interview to hear him out. He was determined to win him back but he would have to hear his side of the story. He would have to hear the version that he never mentioned in all his other interviews.

But that would have to wait. Right now Bret wasn't sure Shawn would even show up later which meant he would be spending the day trying to get in his good graces. Shouldn't be all that difficult now that John was out of the picture but then there's Hunter.

Bret scowled. That big nosed son-of-a-bitch always had a knack for inserting himself where he didn't belong and from the looks of it, he'd had found him an emo version of Shawn since the real one didn't want him anymore. The thought made Bret laugh. They seemed right for each other though and he could tell by the way they interacted that they were deeply in love but Bret didn't care. He was convinced now more than ever that Hunter's the reason they broke up. After seeing Shawn today there's just no way he could ever dream of leaving him. Just seeing his beautiful eyes and kissing those lips reminded him all over again why he fell for him in the first place. Love at first sight. Some people say it doesn't exist but Bret was more than certain he and Shawn were the exception.

Bret rolled over and groaned. He didn't ask for this. He didn't plan on this happening either. If anything he figured he'd take one more look at Shawn just to make sure he still hated him but after hearing about Marty and reliving their first time together, there was no way he could deny anything anymore. Those feeling were just as strong as ever and even now all he could think about was making love to his Shawn. Bret closed his eyes letting the sweet sounds that Shawn made earlier that day send him to a peaceful slumber.

**~***~**

Mike didn't get much sleep that night which was why when his phone started vibrating a few hours later he was more than eager to answer it. He looked down and saw that it was JoMo calling. He wasted no time picking it up.

"Hello? John?" he whispered.

"Hey…Mike, are you alright? Why are you—

"Because Chris is still asleep. Wait…hold on a sec." Mike somehow managed to ease away from Chris and quietly made his way towards the restroom closing the door behind him. "I'm back."

"Alright. So…how are things? I was with Mark when he got the call from John this morning. I wish I could have stuck around but you know we have a show to tape tonight."

"Yeah uh…not good." Mike caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and frowned. "I look like shit."

"Yeah but that's nothing new," his friend joked.

"Shut up. How's Marky?"

"He's good. Pissed off at John though. We both can't believe he would just take off like that."

"Yeah well Chris isn't too happy about it either but I'm thinking Mark's taking this a lot better than Chris."

"How you figure?"

"Well…" Mike peered through the crack he left in the door and saw that Chris was still sleeping. He sighed. "He's…scared John. And he's been crying – a lot. Something about that incident from a few months ago. It's got him so shaken up. He's even cancelling the interview."

"Wow. That's…but does Shawn and Bret know?"

"Not yet. They'll know when they get there I suppose. I don't think Chris can bring himself to call Shawn. Every time his name is brought up Chris loses it. I mean Christ. I heard about what happened but…was it really that bad?"

"Dude. You have no idea. I got the full story from Mark and Adam and let me tell you Shawn was not happy. But Hunter…those guys really did a number on John."

"And Bret's about to get the same treatment when Hunter finds out."

"What do you mean?"

"Hunter and Bret had a run in late last night. I'm not going to lie. It wasn't pretty but they managed not to come to blows…yet. Hunter basically told Bret to back off or else he would get the same kind of treatment John got."

"Oh fuck. Well that's not good."

"I didn't think so."

"Well…I should probably talk with Mark about what's going down on your end. But it's just too bad that I can't be there ya know? I want to help. I want to be there for you and Mark but duty calls."

"Yeah I know but don't worry. I got it under control."

"I know you do Mikey. Take care of Chris. I'm sure he could use someone like you right now. Shawn was his closest friend despite all the fighting they did. He still feels bad about ruining it so you do what you can to help him. I'll see you guys soon."

"Alright. Thanks for checking in John."

"No problem. Love you Mikey."

"Love you too. Later."

Mike put his phone away and sighed. He really missed having John in his life but he knew it was high time to move on. He splashed some water on his face, brushed his teeth then headed out the bathroom only to bump right into Chris.

"Oh…Chris. I didn't know… How long have you been standing there?" he asked stammering.

"Long enough to see that you're worried. Come here." Chris pulled Mike closer to him embracing him in a warm hug. "I'm fine. I really am and just so you know, I slept pretty good."

"You…did?"

"Oh yeah and I'm thinking it's thanks to a new friend of mine whose been nothing but good to me since we started hanging out."

This made Mike blush so he looked away, hoping to hide his reaction. "It's…nothing. You're my…closest friend now. I can't help but to worry."

"And I'm glad you do. It feels good to know that I have someone around who cares for me. I'm…sorry about you though. I know I seem out of it all the time – especially lately but I promise to be more wary of your feelings from now on."

Mike looked up and frowned. "But Chris, I'm fine. You really needn't worry about me."

"I…I figured you say that but you can't have been happy with the way I've been treating you lately. I mean, I know we're not…lovers or anything but I still feel like I should treat you better."

"You've been going through a tough time. It's my job to be your shoulder to lean on."

"Maybe but it's also my job to show you that I appreciate your friendship. I do and I promise one of these days I'll make it up to you. I don't know how yet but I will. I promise." Chris kissed the top of his head before pushing past him for the restroom. The door closed with a click and then came the sound of rushing water.

Instead of crossing the room, Mike merely leaned against the door, his legs barely holding him up as he thought about Chris' promise. It was an unnecessary promise to make considering Mike had no plans of ever abandoning him. In fact, he really didn't want anything from Chris except to be with him…all the time. Like a…lover. _Stupid Mike. Don't think like that! Besides, he'd have to love me first and I'm sure love is the farthest thing from his mind…_ With a sigh, Mike hurried across the room to find something to wear for the long day that awaited both him and Chris.

**~***~**

Shawn woke up the next morning to the sound of the alarm on his phone. He groaned. He was comfortable and did not wish to move from his warm bed but he knew he had to. His alarm was set for 10 am which meant he already had about an hour to dress and make it to headquarters on time. Shawn reached over and grabbed his phone off the desk shutting it off. Stifling a yawn, he sat up in bed allowing his eyes to adjust to the unkind light entering his room from the sun. After a minute or two, he finally willed himself to go start his shower. As he was coming out of the restroom, he suddenly realized that he was alone. _I could have sworn John was here last night…or did I dream it all?_ Shawn hurried towards the bed stopping when he spotted John's favorite pink tie on the floor. Smiling, he picked it up bringing it to his nose breathing in the familiar smell.

"_Ahhh…Shawny…kitten…please…," he moaned. "You're too wet and hot…Ahh fuck!" Shawn's tongue was teasing his slit so much that he couldn't stop cum from leaking through. "Ohhh….kitten…no more…I need…" Shawn's mouth moved up and down slowly over is shaft purposely prolonging John's relief._

"_Tell me you love me John."_

"_I…fuck I love you!" he screamed. Shawn smiled as his hand moved to cup John's balls giving them a hard squeeze. John gripped the sheets even tighter begging Shawn to let him cum. _

"_Cum for me now John." Shawn covered him completely, holding him down while he released in his mouth…_

Shawn frowned. "It wasn't a dream. He was here and now he's not." Shawn sat down on the edge of the bed thinking to himself. He was starting to remember the events from the day before and with each passing second he was growing restless. When John came to him yesterday he was really upset. Not at him but at himself for making Shawn do the interview. He was starting to feel the strain that came along with Bret Hart and was ready to throw in the towel on their relationship. _But I wouldn't let him. I told him I wanted to stay with him… He promised not to give up on us… Or did he?_ Shawn jumped to his feet and started pacing the room. _What did I say to him last night? Dammit Shawn think! He can't be gone away? No…_

"I'm over reacting," he said calmly. "Maybe he went out for breakfast." Maybe yet he still couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong but he wasn't going to dwell on it. Shawn chose to ignore the bad feeling and hop in the shower. He stayed in the shower for a little over an hour which meant he was late for the interview, but he didn't care. He really didn't want to go back anyway and if it wasn't for the fact that he wanted to prove to John that he loved him, he wouldn't even bother.

Shawn put on some comfortable jeans and a white button down with some timbs. Since he had no idea where his hair twister was he had no choice but to wear his hair down. He really didn't want to considering it would only tempt Bret but he'd have to find a way to deal with it. _Bret is not going to get to me today. No matter what I will fight him off and return to my John. _That's what he kept telling himself but even as he thought it, he knew it was easier said than done.

**~*~*~**

Chris took a deep breath and headed inside headquarters. He decided to come alone rather than drag his friend Mike with him. Mike had already done enough and he was fairly certain he could handle this on his own. Mike had been so adamant about coming. In fact, it was kind of sweet the way he acted…

_"Chris, are you sure you don't want me to come with?"_

_"I'll be alright," he laughed. "You worry too much."_

_"Can you really blame me?" he grumbled._

_Chris smirked, highly amused at Mike. His arms were folded across his chest and he was actually pouting. It was so cute that Chris almost said it out loud but he caught himself. He smiled closing the gap between them. Mike looked up at him but he was still pouting. Chris laughed. "Can you stop that pouting?" he joked. "It's not going to change my mind you know. As much as I pout, you can't win with that one against the master of pouting."_

_Mike finally unfolded his arms, a smile lighting up his handsome face. "Fine, but you be sure to check in with me later. If you somehow end up staying just…know that I'm here for you."_

_"I know you are."_

Chris didn't even realize he was standing outside the interview room. He had been so lost in thought that he barely registered where he was going.

"Hey Chris. Have you seen Bret?"

Chris jumped at the sound of Shawn's voice. "Shawn!" he exclaimed. "Wow. Uh…" Chris blinked several times to make sure he was seeing clearly but he was not mistaken. Shawn was definitely standing there – in the flesh – looking as beautiful as ever. And he looked…fine. Chris frowned half wondering if this was a joke. He wanted to ask about John but for fear of getting screamed at, he decided to play along. "Uh…how are you?" he asked, doing his best to remain cautious.

"I'm fine," he answered. "So where's Mr. Ego? He had better show up or else. I could be somewhere with my lover."

"Mr. Ego is right here." Both Shawn and Chris looked up to see Bret coming off the elevator. Shawn had to make himself look away from those alluring eyes, not to mention Bret was dressed to turn heads. He was wearing some very nice dark slacks and a light pink button down shirt. Of course Bret had to show off. His shirt was only half buttoned, showing off his perfect chest adorned with a silver chain necklace that read "Angel". Shawn refused to look at him. He knew Bret's game but he wasn't falling for it. He wasn't going to let him…

"What were you saying about my ego beautiful?" he teased. He was now standing between Chris and Shawn, his fingers moving to casually twirl a strand of the blonde hair he loved so much. Shawn snatched away glaring at him.

"Don't touch me," he warned. "I'm setting the ground rules now. No more of that stunt you pulled yesterday Bret. I mean it."

"It wasn't a stunt princess."

"And…for Christ's sake stop calling me that!" he snapped irritably.

"Fine. So let's get this show on the road shall we?"

"Uh…" Chris looked back and forth between the two of them. In all honesty he hadn't expected either one of them to show up, especially Shawn considering John had left him but then…Shawn wasn't exactly acting the way Chris imagined him to act. He was calmer than expected which led Chris to believe that maybe Shawn had absolutely no idea that John was gone. The lightbulb went off in his head and for a second he almost blurted it out. _So John's gone but Shawn has no idea… That's got to be it. So now what?_

"Chris? I'd really like to get a move on so I can get back to John. I don't want him to think I've run off."

Bret smirked. "I doubt you should be in much of a hurry love. By the time we're done here today, you'll be back in my bed writhing underneath me from sheer, unimaginable pleasure," he joked.

"Oh you give yourself way too much credit," Shawn mumbled.

"We'll see."

"Chris, can we please get this show on the road?" Shawn begged.

"Uh…well…we _can_…it's just that…I kind of assumed neither of you would want to finish this so—

"Oh no," Shawn growled. "We are finishing this up and we're going to finish it all today. I am having a hard enough time as it is but I'm going to tough it out – at least for John anyway."

"And you know I want to finish," Bret grinned. "I got too much on the line to stop now."

Chris sighed. "Fine. We'll continue. I'll just go inside and set things up." Chris fumbled to unlock the door as quickly as he could before heading inside leaving the two ex lovers out in the hall. Shawn could feel Bret's eyes on him making him nervous. He hated it. He hated that stare. Bret was always able to undress him with his eyes adding to the uncomfortable tension. Finally after several seconds of this Shawn snapped.

"Dammit Bret will you stop it?! I know what you're doing and I wish you'd stop. It's rude to stare you know."

Bret smiled. "You didn't used to mind."

"That was before I had any kind of sense." Bret chuckled as he moved closer to the blonde. Shawn held up his hands but Bret merely clasped his wrists, pulling his arms down like he used to. "Bret don't…" He backed Shawn against the wall boring into him with eyes filled with lust. Shawn was practically paralyzed from his stare.

"Then how come you sound so weak?" he asked softly. His hand moved to caress Shawn's face but Shawn looked away.

"Don't touch me."

Bret moved closer to Shawn, bending his head to kiss the exposed flesh around Shawn's neck. "Why not? Why can't I touch my princess?"

"You just can't now please stop!" he snapped though it came out as more of a plea than anything else. Bret was not convinced and decided to push his luck. He bit down on Shawn's flesh drawing a slight hiss from him. "St-st-stop it!" he breathed.

"I can't help it," Bret answered weakly. "I love you too much." He guided a hand up Shawn's body stopping only to clasp his chin, forcing him to look at him. "And I think you still have feelings for me too."

Shawn was trapped and while he hated to admit it, Bret was right. He did have feelings for him but he still wasn't sure how strong they were.

"Please…don't…"

"I want you Shawn. Just…give in to me…like you used to." Shawn couldn't look away and before he knew it, Bret's lips were engaging his in a kiss. He fought it at first, refusing to allow him to command him until Bret's other hand made its way between his legs. "Stop fighting me," he whispered. He caressed Shawn there making him moan.

"Ahh…no Bret please…" he moaned but it was just enough for Bret to enter, exploring his cavern like he'd never tasted him before. Shawn was weak against him, his lips now responding against his will from the power of Bret's kiss.

Chris cleared his throat. "You guys? You can…come in now."

Bret slowly pulled away from Shawn, smiling at the angry look he was getting. He grabbed Shawn's hand, bringing it to his lips. "Shall we?" Shawn snatched away from him and stormed into the room ahead of him. Chris started to follow but Bret grabbed his shoulder. "Just a sec Chris. Have you…talked to Shawn about John yet?"

Chris shook his head. "No, and I can't help but wonder whether or not he knows about it."

"I was thinking the same thing. So do you think we should tell him?"

Chris frowned. "_You're_ not going to say a word. If anything I should be the one to tell him though…" He sighed. "I really can't bear to see him like he was once before."

"Then don't tell him."

Chris frowned. "You just don't want me to tell him for your own selfish reasons."

"That's not true Chris and you know it," he growled. "You should know me better than that. I've _always_ fought for what I wanted and I always fight fair. Shawn can even vouch for me on that. It's guys like you and Hunter who could learn a thing or two about being fair." Bret's words stung him like a bee but he ignored the guilty feeling. Now was not the time to revert back to being helpless and weak.

"So what? Just let him keep thinking John's waiting back at home?"

Bret sighed. "I hate keeping things from him but at the same time, we don't really have proof. Shawn didn't say John was gone and from the sounds of it, he must have woke up next to John – or at least seen him recently."

"Yeah…you're right but…Mark—

"I say you let Mark handle it." Chris still looked unsure. "Look Chris, I love Shawn. I love him with all my heart and I'm still going to fight for him. But if you tell him about John…it's going to upset him. I want Shawn all to myself like a selfish bastard but if Shawn realizes he's alone, he'll only be that much more vulnerable. I don't particularly want him running to me because he's alone. I want him to come back to me because he loves me. I really want to win him fairly and in order to do that I need him focused on us."

Chris thought about Bret's words for a long time before finally nodding. "Alright. I'll keep quiet but if he doesn't find out soon—

"I'll do the honors if I have to. I promise. Now let's get going. We have a lot to talk about."

* * *

AN: That took less time than I thought it would. Between the new Shawn/JBL OST I did the other day and some other request I'm working on, I thought my brain wouldn't be able to handle dishing out another chapter for this long and angsty piece. Oh boy what have my muses gotten me into? I swear...I think this is bad...what the heck? Once again secrets are being kept. Usually when that happens Shawn loses about a dozen friends. Let's hope the muses have other plans. Hope you enjoyed the update. Just out of curiosity, who are you guys pulling for? Bret or are we hoping John comes back? I don't think it will change the ending I have planned but you never know. Just so you know, I was going to have Shawn end up with Cena in the first part but JBL turned out to be such a nice guy that I didn't have the heart to do it. I'm such a pansy:P

**FYI: I think you ought to check out:**

1) _**The Devil's Due by Adir Al-Assad**_ - _This is a really cool story starring The Undertaker, Paul Bearer, and JBL. No, it's not freaky like that but check it out. It's awesome!_

2) _**Something More Extreme by AnonymousPunk**_ - _A GREAT story that has a very unlikely pairing. But it works. It's so crazy but I love it. It stars Jeff Hardy so take that for what it's worth. It's so damn good!_

_3) **Piece of Me: The HBKronicles by XxShawn's Angel NefxX (me) **_- _Shameless plug but I want to make sure I get everyone's requests. You have to tell me if you want smut because not all of them are rated 'M'. But the challenge for me lies in creating a plot for each one and making that pairing work. Check it out and if you want, make a request. I'll do my best to get to it...eventually. The lastest chapter features JBL/Shawn thanks to chisato-chan and HBKloverHBK. I'm thinking vadg will enjoy it as well, my resident JBL devotee._

4) _**The Sweetest Dessert by EroSeninsDeciplesJKT**_ (by one of us and I'm pretty sure it was 'K' that wrote it) - _It's total crack but you must read it if you haven't. Oh come on! You know you have a fetish for Superstar/Inanimate Objects. You really have no idea...to appreciate Triple H's sledgehammer in my 'Wrestling God's' story you must first appreciate the original parody that involves the cupcake. Do it. I dare you._


	18. Letting Go

"Um…Chris. Where's the divider?"

Chris looked over at Shawn and winced. "I uh…thought maybe you didn't need it anymore considering…"

"Shawn we're beyond the divider now," Bret answered irritably. "I've seen you. I want you and I'd much rather see your face as we answer questions."

"I'll only stay if you promise to keep your hands off of me."

Bret smirked. "As you wish princess."

"Bret…never mind. Just…don't touch me." Shawn plopped down in his seat though he couldn't help but notice how much closer to Bret it seemed this time around. Bret took his seat but only after leaving about a foot of space between them. Shawn was going to argue but he decided to let it go. It was bad enough having to look at him but arguing with him would be pointless. Bret usually had his way of winning in the end so it wouldn't do much good to argue with him.

Chris suddenly cleared his throat, the lights dimmed and then came the camera again. "Shawn…Bret. The Universe welcomes you back. So we're just going to pick up where we left off the last time. Your uh…trip overseas seemed to be advancing fairly well," he said nervously. "You two seemed to have been getting along really well."

"Yeah we were," Shawn answered grudgingly.

"I'm going to go out on a limb here and say you two took another hit in your awkward friendship." Both men nodded. "So I think the Universe wants to know what changed after that night. Did you start avoiding one another like the plague or did you two finally admit the thing you both seemed to have dreaded?"

Both men shifted nervously in their seats and then Shawn finally answered. "Yes and no. We didn't actually admit anything...not really. Well we did but in so many words. Outside of what Bret let escape him during our…"

"Lovemaking," Bret answered for him.

"Whatever," Shawn mumbled. "We never actually admitted anything for a while. As for that next morning, I think it was tough for both of us…"

**~*~*~**

Shawn yawned softly and sat up in bed. He felt great and he was pretty sure it was because he actually got some sleep. He hadn't been sleeping well at all since Marty left which made him very sluggish and irritable. But last night made all the difference in the world. Not wanting to get up just yet, Shawn turned to lay back down when he jumped. He thought it had been a dream; that it was all in his head but apparently not. Shawn quickly turned away from Bret doing his best to calm his nerves. He couldn't believe it. He just couldn't believe that it had happened and with Bret no less.

A part of Shawn felt warm and fuzzy at the thought. Bret was easily the most gorgeous man he'd ever laid eyes on but he was also probably more than straight. Shawn never really considered himself gay though after being handled by men so much it was kind of hard not to notice things about Bret. On the other hand, Shawn dreaded the coming days. He knew that Bret was probably straight which meant last night was an accident. More than likely last night was about a man who needed to end the awkward tension between two good friends. Having sex with him was probably the only way to do it as well as helping put away any overwhelming curiosities. It was all over. Nothing like this would ever happen again and they could go on being just friends again. Shawn knew this and yet the selfish part of him wanted to start crying even though he should have been used to this by now. Marty left. Kenny left and now Bret. Shawn jumped again when he felt a warm hand touch his lower back.

"I didn't mean to scare you," Bret said softly.

Too afraid to face him, Shawn simply shrugged. "It's alright. I'm just a little jumpy this morning."

Bret's hand moved up his back, tickling his spine. "I'm sorry. Are you angry with me?"

Shawn shook his head. "No. I…" Shawn's voice trailed off because he was too afraid to continue. His voice had started to crack and he was now on the verge of tears. This usually happened after he had sex with a guy but this time was different. Bret was the only one who didn't force him into sex so it should have made things easier to deal with but no. This was by far a worse feeling than what happened with Kenny. Without warning, Shawn quickly got off the bed and hurried inside the restroom. He flicked the shower on then his legs gave way and he slid down the door in tears.

**~*~*~**

"Why were you crying?" Chris asked.

Shawn took a deep breath before finally answering. "I don't know Chris. I guess I was just overwhelmed. I hadn't felt that attached to anyone since Marty and I guess I was afraid. I lost Marty and I lost Kenneth too."

"But he was a douche!" Bret exclaimed.

"Yeah but only at first," Shawn explained. "You see after I made that deal with him, I told you that he was nicer to me and I wasn't lying. He really treated me decent. It was like I was his prized possession. I didn't realize it at the time but when I broke off from him and Marty left, I kind of realized that I missed them. It hurt and as you know already, I cried a lot. If…it hadn't been for you, I really don't know what I would have done. So…so there. That's why I was sad Chris. I was afraid I'd lose Bret for good."

"Wow. That's some kind of confession," Chris replied. "Kenneth meant more to you than you thought huh?" Shawn simply nodded and went back to fidgeting with his watch nervously. Chris turned to Bret. "So tell me what happened next? How were your initial feelings the morning after?"

Bret sighed. "I felt pretty bad myself. I…kind of made up my mind after making love to him that I would do everything in my power to keep him but that was easier said than done. It's not like we could actually tell anyone about us. Rumors were already being spread about Shawn so I didn't want to add to the hurt by being seen with him so much. Then there's Owen who would always be around to keep me in check so I wouldn't have been able to be with him much anyway. There were so many problems with that one night and I should have just let it go. I should have taken a vacation to get over what I had done but I couldn't do it."

"Why not?" Chris asked.

"Shawn was my friend first. We were really close before I made him my lover so I wanted to do everything I could to at least keep the friendship alive. I figured that's why Shawn ran into the bathroom. I thought he was either feeling what I was feeling or just sick at the thought of having slept with me."

"Which one was it Shawn?" Chris asked.

"I was feeling sick but not because of the sex. Being with a man at this point was pretty much just another day in my life. The sickness came at the thought of having to watch you each day without being able to interact. I'm sure I was probably in love with you at the time but I pushed the thought. I couldn't confess something like that even if you were my best friend so I cried. I went in the bathroom to let all of those feelings out so I could get through the rest of the day."

"But I ruined that for him," Bret added sadly. "I just…I felt so bad about taking him like that so I wanted to apologize to him. I wanted to explain to him that I didn't want to lose him as a friend and I was more than willing to beg. But all that went out the window once I finally made my way inside…"

***~*~***

Bret watched him run off sadly before falling back against the pillows. Bret could relate. He was feeling just as bad as Shawn, if not more. But Bret wasn't entirely sure what Shawn was feeling. He really hoped that Shawn wasn't disgusted at the thought of having slept with a man. He said last night that it was okay but even Bret knew some things said during sex should not be taken to heart. _Like my declaration of love…_ Bret shook his head. He could not believe he'd let that slip out of his mouth that night. The sad part about it was that it was probably true. How else would you explain the feelings he got around that beautiful blonde? _Beautiful…_

Bret rolled over and groaned. All he could see in his head were images of Shawn naked and lying on the bed beneath him; his hair sprawled beautifully over the pillows. The image alone made Bret feel a tingle down south. He cursed himself. Just how the hell was he supposed to get over Shawn if all he could think about was his naked body? Or all the sweet sounds he made during sex? Or how sexy his lips were? And how unbelievably tight… _Oh fuck. I'm doing it again._ Bret finally rolled out of bed and just stared at the floor deep in thought. In just a few short hours they would be boarding a plane back to the states. Bret sighed. He didn't want to go back. The thought alone made his insides turn. Boarding that plane would mean leaving behind so much. No one could know what he'd done to Shawn. Not only would it ruin them but it would also make life extremely difficult for Shawn. People already thought he was queer and if people knew about the two of them then they'd really get on his case. Bret knew this and yet he couldn't help but feel so weak right now.

Bret finally stood to his feet and started slowly making his way towards the restroom. The water was still running full force which meant Shawn was safely behind the curtain showering. Bret slowly pushed open the door with every intention of apologizing. He was going to apologize for taking his body and beg him to forget all about it so that they could still be friends, but no. All he could do was watch, brain dead, as the water drizzled down Shawn's back and over his perfect little bottom. The steam pouring off his body made it that much worse and Bret found himself faced again with the same dilemma as before. He was hard – painfully hard – but he was sure his reason for entering the bathroom was something other than to fuck the hell out of a certain blonde. Shawn suddenly turned around in the shower to grab more soap but when he saw Bret standing there he froze. Their eyes locked and then Bret suddenly felt heat rise to his face when the blonde's eyes lowered noticing his little problem. Shawn blushed, apparently too nervous to say or do anything. The pain in Bret's lower half finally won him over and he found himself stepping inside the shower just mere inches from Shawn. Bret reached out to touch his face and Shawn looked up with eyes that made Bret forget all about "letting him go". Bret was stunned. Shawn's eyes shined like jewels but even in the shower Bret could sense the sadness in them.

"What's wrong beautiful?"

"Nothing."

He'd answered too quickly which let Bret know something was up. "Is it me? Did I hurt you?"

Shawn shook his head. "No, no…It's not…" But his voice trailed off again and Bret knew he was going to cry. The Hitman wrapped his arms around the blonde doing his best to ignore the tingle below.

"I did this to you and I'm sorry. I never meant to ruin our friendship like this. I just…I let my body think for me and I was all over you before I could even think about the consequences."

Shawn shook his head. "No…It's alright. It wasn't…I think I wanted it to happen," he confessed. "It's just…we can't…"

"I know," he finished for him. "I know this and yet I'm still being selfish. I care about our friendship. You're my best friend and I don't want to lose you but…" Bret pulled back a little so he could look in Shawn's eyes. "You…I don't think I've ever felt so strongly about someone and to lose you would hurt my heart. When we leave here today I know we have to…I have to put aside my selfish desires but can we at least remain friends?"

"You…still want me as a friend?"

"Of course I do princess! I'd rather have you as a friend than nothing at all." Shawn blushed again causing Bret's member to tingle even more. That flushed face mixed with Shawn's alluring eyes and smile made Bret lose control again. Shawn barely got the "okay" out of his mouth before Bret was taking his lips. "I'm sorry," he whispered before claiming Shawn's lips. The kiss was just as electric as ever and Shawn's willingness to submit made it that much sweeter. The blonde allowed Bret to explore his mouth, moaning softly every time their members touched accidentally. Bret pulled Shawn closer to him loving the way his smaller arms clung tightly to his body. Bret nipped at his ear playfully. "Please don't leave me," he whispered.

"I-I won't," he managed as Bret sucked on his neck, tasting his delicious wet flesh. Bret quickly dropped to his knees ignoring the water that was now pouring on top of him. He took Shawn's fully erect member into his hand, using his thumb to caress the head. Shawn bit his lip trying to hold back a moan but Bret wouldn't allow it. He needed Shawn to make as much noise as possible so that he could at least have the sweet memory of their lovemaking implanted in his brain. Bret ran his tongue over the head and Shawn whimpered.

"That's what I like to hear beautiful." Bret sucked on the head of Shawn's cock, using his tongue to tease the slit.

"Oh…God Bret…" The Hitman finally covered him completely, sucking him hard. The sensation was better than anything Shawn could have dreamed of and he was now completely at Bret's mercy. His hips thrust forward into the warmth fucking Bret's mouth relentlessly. Bret couldn't help but to glance at Shawn every now and then loving the way his hair clung to his perfect body. "Ohhhh…Bret please…I'm about to cum…" Bret sucked even harder on Shawn's cock until the blonde exploded. Shawn's body trembled and he almost fell to knees had it not been for Bret holding him up. Bret smiled, licking his lips before lifting the blonde in the air. Shawn wrapped his legs around his waist as Bret slowly thrust inside him. Bret pushed them back against the tile and moved in and out of him slowly. Shawn's soft cries of pleasure were making it that much harder to keep a slow pace.

"Shawn…baby if you keep this up I'm going to explode," he crooned. Shawn smiled and started moving on his on, taking Bret deeper inside of him. "Fuck Shawn…so…good baby…" Bret grabbed his arms holding them high above his head and started fucking him harder.

"Mn…Bret…Ahhh…fuck!" Bret had found his sweet spot and was nailing it with every thrust. "Please…God Bret harder…" Bret claimed his lips for another fiery kiss as he slammed into him faster and harder.

"Shawn…baby you're so…good…I-I-Fuck I love you…" Bret slammed into him one last time and they both exploded with cries of pleasure. Shawn could barely hold himself up and so he clung to Bret to keep from falling. Bret kissed his neck. "I got you baby. I won't let you fall. Good thing you're just a little fellow," he teased.

Shawn raised his head, his lips poked out in a pout. "I'm not _that_ little."

Bret couldn't resist taking his lips for another kiss. "Stop pouting and I wouldn't have to do that."

"I'll do my best…especially since…" His voice trailed off and he just buried his face in Bret's chest. He let his hands slide down around Bret's waist taking in the feel of his soft flesh. His smaller hands felt sweet next to Bret and he found his touch to rival that of a scorching fire, burning into his flesh.

Bret sighed. He knew what Shawn meant but he didn't really want to go there, especially after making love to him for a second time. It was just as good as before and once again, he'd managed to let slip his true feelings for the blonde. _I feel so bad… Why can't I just control myself?_ Bret kissed the top of Shawn's head and just held him close. The longer Bret held him the harder it was to wrap his brain around the fact that he couldn't keep him. He would have to let him go and as soon as they boarded that plane, it would all be over. _I don't want to…_ "I really don't want to let you go."

After a long pause, Shawn spoke up in barely a whisper. "And I don't want to be 'let go'."

***~*~***

"That day sucked," Bret grumbled. "You really have no idea how much it sucked…aside from the obvious great sex."

Chris shook his head. "Wow. So I take it you understood what Shawn meant? I mean, maybe it's just me but it sounds to me like you two loved each other."

"We did. We just didn't say it," Shawn replied. "It was like we were trying to fool ourselves. You know, if you don't say it then maybe it will go away. Man were we in for a rude awakening."

"So the plane ride…How'd it go?"

"Well, I finally let go of him when I heard my pager going off. Knew it was Owen which meant Shawn and I needed to get a move on. We both hurried out the restroom in complete silence trying our best to forget everything but…"

"I'll take it from here," Shawn said reluctantly. "We uh…had a moment near the planes…"

**~*~*~**

Both Shawn and Bret walked through the airport in complete silence, each male lost in their own thoughts. Shawn would every now and then glance over at Bret but his face was no more readable than it was when Shawn confessed his feelings…if you'd even call what he said a complete confession. Either way it was probably true. He'd had too long to dwell on it and the only thing that fit was that four letter word of doom. Shawn sighed. He wish he never would have let Bret room with him. He knew from the beginning that it was a bad idea but he never thought they would end up in bed. Sure they had shared a few "moments" but that didn't mean Bret would actually go all the way. _Guess I was wrong and now I'm paying for it. I am so stupid…_

They finally reached the planes but they would not be traveling together. It was for the best they agreed and Shawn was sure that it was. But it still didn't stop him from wanting to be a spoiled brat. He wanted his Bret but not in this lifetime. It just wasn't meant to be.

"So…"

Shawn looked over at Bret and forced a weak smile. "Yeah. Guess this is where we part ways." They both stood there staring at the ground in an awkward silence. No one was around so it wasn't like they had to act this way. Most of the guys were still eating breakfast somewhere but Bret and Shawn both were too sick to eat anything. _Screw this… _Shawn quickly walked up to Bret closing the huge gap between them. He took a deep breath before gripping his shoulders. The Hitman looked up, his face showing nothing but signs of pure longing. Shawn leaned forward pressing their lips together for a quick kiss. "I really do you know," he whispered before turning to leave.

**~*~*~**

"I kissed him and ran. Not literally but I took off not bothering to look behind me before he could even think to respond. I was crying…sobbing but I couldn't let him see," Shawn choked. "I knew…I just knew in my heart that if he saw me crying he'd try and rescue me like always."

"You were right," Bret added. "I would have come to you and made the pain go away."

"And we would have been worse off than we already were," Shawn choked again. "And I'm tired of talking about this. I want to go…"

"Shawn look at me," Bret commanded but Shawn shook his head furiously. "Come on princess. You're crying again—

"I can't help it!" he cried. "All of this…I don't want to talk about it anymore."

The room was silent for a while. Chris remained quiet in an attempt to mask his own feelings. He was sure he'd break down and cry soon but for other reasons. As for Bret, he just stared down at the floor, his heart pounding furiously. He loved Shawn. He was now more than convinced that he still loved Shawn and if it wasn't for Chris being around he would probably be all over him. Bret sighed. He hated having to put Shawn through this but he knew it was the only way to remind him of their bond. Bret looked over at Shawn and smiled. "So you didn't want to let your Bret go huh? Spoiled brat."

Shawn looked over at him and shook his head. "No I didn't but that was years ago. Now all I want to do is fast forward to Montreal, apologize for my part and go home. You should be ready to wrap this up as well. Your wife and kids—

"I don't care. I care about you."

"How can you be so selfish Bret?" Shawn snapped. "Your kids…you have _kids_. Can't you put them ahead of yourself for once?"

"They're all big kids Shawn. They can handle it."

"Oh my God…You're unbelievable! Look Bret, I'll play your little game right now and confess that I do still care about you. Hell I might even love you still but my love for you won't replace my love for John. It just ain't gonna happen. I love him too much to just go crawling back to you so whatever you have planned in that thick skull of yours, let it go."

"I don't have anything planned princess. I want you back but I plan on fighting fair."

"You shouldn't be fighting at all. I already gave you my answer. Go home to your family Bret. We're not the same as we once were. We've both moved on and are happier than ever."

Bret suddenly reached over, placing his hand in Shawn's giving it a gentle squeeze. Shawn looked up, their eyes locking and Bret smiled weakly as he spoke. "For some reason, I think you could be happier." The words hit Shawn like a gun to the chest and he was instantly reminded of a similar conversation – one he had with John not too long ago…

"_Say…John?"_

"_What do you want?" he grumbled. _

"_Are you happy?" _

_Shawn heard John chuckle behind him which made him smile. "What the hell kind of question is that? Of course I'm happy. Couldn't be any happier."_

"_Oh. Okay. If you say so," he answered casually. Shawn could feel John's eyes boring into him which meant he struck a nerve._

"_What? Do I look unhappy to you?" the Texan asked. His tone of voice seemed to be a mixture of uncertainty and curiosity which didn't surprise Shawn at all. Vince McMahon always told him that he had a scary knack for reading people. Sometimes he was so good at it that it actually pissed people off but that was not his intention right now. Shawn quickly turned to face his boss staring at him intensely. He closed the gap between them leaving mere inches of space. The heat began to rise to John's face again and he could feel himself wanting to run away. Shawn slid his hands down John's arms then clasped his hands. He stared down at their hands as he answered softly._

"_No. You don't. You seem like you're happy enough but I think you could be happier." John was not expecting such an answer but if Shawn was looking to make him think, he succeeded. John never really sat down to think about his happiness. To John, as long as he was wrestling and had lots of money he was happy. Never had he thought of other things to make him happy, especially after Ron left. Since then happiness meant money, beer, the occasional sex, and wrestling. That was all he needed right?_

"_Since you have all the answers kitten then tell me how I can be happier?" The blonde suddenly looked up at him with a softened expression that made John's heart skip a beat. Shawn reached up and cupped the side of his face drawing a low hiss from John. "Shawn, don't…" he moaned._

"_If I really get you to Wrestlemania as champ, will that make you happy?" he asked. For a moment John was unable to speak. It was a combination of the question, mixed with Shawn's alluring voice…his touch…his eyes…it all seemed to make his head spin._

"_Wow. Shawn I—_

"_Will it John? Please. I really wanna know."_

"_I…I suppose it would but Shawn—_

"_Done. I'll get you to Mania as champ." Shawn quickly let go of John's hands and left the locker room… _

"Shawn? Shawn, are you alright?" Shawn was clasping Bret's hand, trembling with tears streaming down his face again. "Shawn what's wrong?" Bret asked. Shawn quickly stood to his feet and hurried out of the room. He needed to see John. He couldn't explain it nor could he explain why all of a sudden he couldn't sense John anymore.

Shawn didn't stop running until he was standing inside the elevator heading for the exit. Bret's words triggered such a strong memory about John that Shawn felt like he'd explode if he didn't get to John soon. That memory – that moment with John from that day was the very reason they were together. John took a chance on his happiness by allowing Shawn to decide what's better for him. In the end, Shawn chose himself as John's ultimate happiness instead of some piece of gold. Was it smart? Shawn thought so at the time but the more time he spent with Bret the more time he had to wonder whether or not he was setting both him and John up for failure. He didn't want to fail. He loved John and he knew John loved him too. They'd been through so much together that the thought of betraying John was just unheard of, especially since he was the one who came to him in his moment of need and possibly the lowest point in his entire life…

"_LET ME GO!" _

"_Oh no. You're about to make Kurt's dream come true," Adam sang. Glen and Adam pulled Shawn to his feet and slung him hard against the wall. Glen pinned Shawn's arms high above his head while Adam yanked his jogging pants down. Kurt stood behind Shawn eyeing his bottom like candy._

"_You know Shawn, has anyone ever told you that you have a perfect ass?" _

"_Let…me…GO!"_

"_I don't think so," Kurt sang. He unzipped his jeans revealing his hard member. He stroked it a few times before he reached out pulling Shawn's hips toward him._

"_No…Kurt please don't do this," Shawn begged but his begging was drowned out by laughter._

"_Not doing all that smack talk now are you Shawn?"…_

Shawn got in his car and sped away from headquarters. When he reached the hotel he didn't stop moving until he was standing outside their suite. Shawn fumbled with the card key letting himself inside the room. _John...Please John... _He stopped short, his heart suddenly breaking in two. Gone. All of John's things were gone. For a second Shawn considered that maybe John took his things back to Trips room but he knew better. He knew John. In fact he knew John better than John probably knew himself which meant Shawn was right. He was gone and now Shawn was completely alone. Shawn managed to take two steps before the weight of his heart sent him to his knees. He covered his face with his hands and started crying. His John was gone and Shawn knew that he was probably long gone by now and possibly forever.

* * *

AN: Thanks to everyone who's been reviewing. You know who you are including a new reader, HBKvixen. Hope you all are still enjoying the updates. I try to reply to all of you but sometimes I forget. But you all know why. Trying to manage five stories on two different accounts is crazy business. So...things you should know about this fic: 1) Flashbacks are from 'The Deal' 2) The fight's not over yet 3) The other friends will eventually make their debut 4) I have been trying my best to figure out a way to shorten this fic but I can't skip certain things not to mention it will cloud the main plot which is the fight between Bret & Shawn so who knows how long this damn fic will be. But I am about ready to fire it. Its giving me a headache moreso than 'The Deal' did. Dont expect another update on this one any time soon. Maybe I'll update the 'Wrestling Gods'...

**FYI:** _Some of us at Ero have a twitter now. If you want to add me let me know in your review and I'll send you my addy. Just be sure to tell me who you are when I add you so I'll know who I'm talking to. My life's not all that interesting mind you but I do actually tweet several times a day._

**_Oh and be sure to check out some of the fics I recommended in the last chapter or two. They're all really good. Chisato-chan, glad you enjoyed the HBK/JBL OST from "Piece of me: The HBKronicles". I was thinking specifically of you when I wrote it._**


	19. Giving In

"Shawn…Come on baby get up."

"No….stop…he's gone," he choked. But even as he protested he was being helped up off of the floor. Warm arms embraced him from behind as he wept softly. He was tired of crying. He'd been crying for God knows how long and he really wished he could stop, but he couldn't. The tears just kept streaming down his face even though he kept his mouth clamped shut. For ten long minutes they just stood there. Shawn was still too shocked to move on his own but his comforter didn't feel much of a need to move him for fear of getting screamed at.

As for Shawn, the world just seemed to stop. As he stared at nothing in particular all he could see was John smiling at him, promising him that he would try. _I'll try…I'll try for you… I love you Shawn, more than you know… _Time seemed to stop as over and over again the dialogue played in his head. He suddenly doubled over, gasping for breath. He wasn't breathing. For how long, he wasn't sure. The only thing that registered was the dizziness as the oxygen rushed to fill his brain. The images were now swirling around his head making him feel nauseous and then he could see them. The colors. Colors that he hated with a passion. Pink and black. Lots of pink and black. Then a face. _His_ face. Replacing that of John's. He snatched away violently scaring the hell out of Bret.

"_Don't_…touch me," he growled. Bret took a few steps towards him but Shawn backed away. "You stay over there. I don't want you anywhere near me you selfish bastard."

"Selfish bastard?" he repeated. "What the hell Shawn? I haven't done anything."

"You…it's all YOUR fault that he's gone," he seethed.

Bret opened his mouth to speak but then closed it just as quickly. The look on Shawn's face was one he wasn't quite familiar with. It was wild, dangerous even and Bret hated it. It was as if the Shawn he knew was gone and something else had replaced him. His eyes no longer held that spark to his jewels – if you could even call them jewels. His eyes…they were dark and cold to compliment the most intimidating frown he'd ever seen. "Sh…Shawn I…"

"I knew it," he continued. "Somehow I just knew it was too good to be true." Shawn suddenly laughed a little but it wasn't a happy laugh. In fact, it was almost cruel in a way that touched a nerve.

"Shawn listen…" But Bret was completely ignored.

"We never fight," Shawn continued, almost as if he was talking to himself. "After I broke our deal at that pay per view, we never fought again. It's like he understands me and I him. I promised him happiness and God knows I've been doing it right. Or have I just been fooling myself – no – impossible." Shawn raised his head, his eyes boring dangerously into Bret. "He never questioned my heart until YOU came into the picture."

Bret couldn't take much more of Shawn's cold demeanor. He hadn't meant to run John off and in truth, he wasn't exactly responsible for John's actions. But Bret knew Shawn like a book. He needed someone to blame for this and Bret was the only other person in the room.

"Shawn…princess listen to me," he said calmly. "I didn't mean for this to happen."

"You followed me back here as if you expected John to be elsewhere," he shot back. Bret stared at him blankly, his face void of any emotion even though his insides were churning. He probably shouldn't have followed him but what choice did he have? Shawn left out of there so quickly and so out of it that Bret and Chris both feared for his safety. Chris offered to go after him but Bret wanted to be there to comfort him. He wasn't entirely sure that Shawn would find the room empty. After all, Shawn had been in a pretty good mood so there wasn't any way of proving John was gone. But now that he was here, he was starting to wish he'd have let Chris come instead.

"Why are you so quiet Bret?" Shawn asked. His voice was soft and filled with hatred that made Bret a little nervous. "Is it because you didn't think I would figure it out?"

"Figure what out?" he asked dumbly. "Shawn, get a grip princess. I haven't seen, let alone talked with John at all so how is it _my_ fault that he's flown the coop?"

"You _followed_ me here," Shawn accused. "You followed me because you knew no one would be here when I got here. This was all part of some outrageous plan to win me back. Tell the truth Bret. You knew he'd be gone." Shawn was more right than he would ever know but Bret wasn't going to give in just yet. Shawn still had no idea exactly how Bret knew and Bret wasn't going to tell him.

"I didn't…Shawn I swear I didn't…I was with you!"

"But you always get what you want right?" he pushed, his voice laded with hints of a tease but Bret knew better. Shawn was about to throw one of his many temper tantrums and the sad thing about it was that he wasn't sure if he could stop him this time. Shawn moved towards him, his eyes still filled with that cold void.

"Shawn please…don't do this," Bret pleaded. He started taking steps back until he hit the wall. He had no where else to go except out the door but he couldn't do that – not with Shawn bordering something between psycho and killer. Shawn shoved him hard against the door.

"You knew he was gone Bret. I don't know how you knew but you knew." Bret adverted his eyes hating that cold stare of Shawn's. The blonde laughed again before turning away. "You're still the same, selfish bastard I screwed over in Montreal."

This struck a nerve. Bret stormed across the room. Gripping Shawn's shoulder he spun him around hard, glaring at him angrily. "Don't. _Don't_ go there Shawn. You still have no idea what really happened that night so—

"And I don't care," he sang. "I could really care less anymore. Once again you've managed to ruin my entire life so it really doesn't matter anymore."

"It does matter!" he snapped. "Two days ago I was lying in a bed telling God how much I still hated your guts. I didn't want to come here let alone see you again but I came anyway. These last two days have been something crazy Shawn and if you think for one second you're the only one hurting then you are dead wrong."

"But your life's not ruined Bret. You still have a home to go to."

"It's not like that Shawn. I told you that I don't want to go back unless you're with me."

"Tsk…That's not the point Bret!" he snapped. "If you for some reason decide that all of this is just a phase and that your so-called love for me is all in your head, then your life can go back to normal. But mine…not mine Bret. I can't…_nothing_ will be the same for anymore because I just lost the one guy who loved me better than anyone else I've ever been with."

"Including me?"

"Oh, _especially_ you," he replied coldly. Shawn turned away from him, his body shaking with fury. He hated his life right now but more importantly he hated himself for being weak. He knew this interview was a bad idea from the get go. Even when they parted ways years ago, it was still hard to actually get away from Bret. They busted up so many times for some reason or another that they probably held the record for most make-ups and break-ups.

Shawn shook his head. He had so many low points in his life and very recently managed to reach rock bottom, or rather, what he thought was rock bottom. Now he wasn't so sure if that was actually the lowest point anymore._ I love John. Even as I'm standing here with Bret, my heart, my body – everything – is screaming for John. I can't even bear to look at Bret let alone listen to him. _

"Shawn…" But Shawn wasn't listening. As he stared at the blank wall with silent tears streaming down his face, he became locked in a duel inside his head. The thoughts all ran together taking over him and it was as if he was dead to the world. "Shawn…"

_Do I still love him? Do I still love Bret? That is the question I need to answer. But I have no answer because I can't feel anything. I'm empty, null and void of anything. I can't even feel John anymore… _

"Shawn?"

_What does it mean? Is it a lie? Is my love for him a lie? What was he to me and I to him? Is it really over?_

"Princess?"

_I hear him… I hear a voice calling my name but I hate it. I can't be too sure though so I ignore it. That voice…really hate that voice… It's annoying like an itch that can't be scratched. _

"Shawn please…

_It's John I want. I'm sure of it but why? Why can't I feel anything?_

"I'm sorry…"

_A whispered voice… It's more than annoying now. Worse than before since it's almost comforting…_

"I love you."

A choke and then he lets go. Bret holds him tightly from behind, whispering words of comfort in his ear as he sobs. He had watched, waited and wondered how long it would take for Shawn to let it out. Shawn was so quiet for so long and his body shook so much that Bret feared he had already snapped and was really having a nervous breakdown. But it seemed like he would be okay and he wasn't about to stop trying. He hated the way John left but he wanted Shawn back no matter what.

"Shawn…" Bret kissed the side of his neck. "I love you…I love you so much."

"Don't…don't make me feel anything…" _Its annoying that voice, comforting me… I don't want to be comforted. I don't want to feel… I'm tired…so tired of this… lips on my neck, sucking my pulse…_

"I love you…" Bret moved to nip at his ear, sliding his hands underneath Shawn's shirt feeling his warm flesh. "I think you love me too."

_I should fight back… I should push it away…ignore the annoying itch but I can't… I cant move… I cant feel… or do I feel? Am I feeling?_

Bret was already on his last button. He slowly slid the shirt off of Shawn's shoulders watching it fall to reveal delicate skin he hadn't tasted in years. He groaned. Just looking at Shawn's body was enough to turn anyone on. Bret eased closer to the blonde pressing his body against him. He kissed his shoulder, running his hands up and down his bare arms. "I know you're ignoring me and I know you're trying to fight it but I wish you wouldn't." He licked at Shawn's neck but still no response. Bret chuckled. "Stubborn. Still so very stubborn but I know you feel it otherwise you wouldn't be so upset. Don't be that way Shawn. Let me love you."

_Voice…that voice…voice I love…voice I hate… hate it… so annoying…_

"Let me in Shawn," he whispered, biting his neck. "Open your mind, body, and soul and let me take back what is mine."

_Voice… comforting… tempting… feeling… what is this feeling?_

"I want you Shawn." Bret's hands moved around Shawn's waist and went to work unfastening his jeans. "Let me…touch you the way that I used to…" Bret slid his hand inside Shawn's pants clasping his member.

Shawn gasped. _Feeling… warmth… I'm not alone… need to be held but not by him… never him… _"No," he gasped. Then Bret squeezed his cock harder, his warm hand almost bringing Shawn to his knees.

"No more fighting," he whispered, licking all around the crying blonde's neck, stroking his cock and all the while ignoring his weak protests. He bit down into Shawn's neck making him whimper. Shawn wriggled to get away but Bret held him tighter, stroking him faster and harder. "You want this Shawn… You need this so stop fighting me…"

_I can't…I won't… but I feel…and it feels good but its wrong…_ "I can't…"

"Yes, you can."

The eternal battle loomed on and before he realized it, he was being carried across the room and onto the bed. "No…No…" Bret peeled Shawn's jeans off and quickly knelt before him taking him into his mouth. "Ahh…" Feeling. He could feel the warmth and it was all he could do not to start thrusting his hips forward. Bret sucked hard on his cock, the suction so strong that Shawn practically choked. His heartbreaking sobs were being replaced with half cries of sheer pleasure; a pleasure that was creeping through his entire body like an electric current.

"Cum for me Shawny…cum for me baby…" Shawn gripped the sheets tightly crying in sheer pleasure. His body shuddered so that Bret feared he wouldn't make it. Bret slowly unbuttoned the rest of his shirt, his eyes filled with a hunger he thought was long gone. Shawn's eyes were still clouded with precipitation but they were no longer held that cold, empty darkness. Bret dropped his pants then moved slowly over Shawn's body, parting his legs. He leaned in for a kiss but Shawn turned his head. Bret only smiled as he kissed his cheek, letting his hands travel down his sides. "Shawn…baby look me."

Shawn slowly turned his head meeting Bret's intense gaze. His lips were immediately taken for a head reeling kiss. He fought it. He fought it like there was no tomorrow but that voice…

"Give into me," he murmured. "Stop fighting and just give in…" Bret suddenly thrust inside him drawing a muffled scream out of the blonde. It was a mixture of pain and intense pleasure as Bret nailed his prostate with every thrust. Shawn gripped Bret tightly, his nails digging deep into his skin as he cried softly. "It's okay… I love you… God I missed being inside you." Bret drove deeper inside of him eliciting more soft whimpers that made his body shudder with pleasure. "So sweet…you sound so sweet and you're mine…_my_ Shawn…my princess…" Shawn's muscles tightened around Bret sending both of them straight to climax. Bret exploded inside of Shawn's tight heat, collapsing on top of him spent. After a minute he finally willed himself to pull out. He rolled over grabbing Shawn pulling him against his chest. Shawn didn't fight or say anything. He just allowed Bret to hold him which in turn, made Bret smile.

"I love you so much princess," he said softly, kissing the top of his head. "I know John's gone but it's his lost. You're a jewel baby. It took me 12 years to realize what I lost but I'm here to stay. I'll never leave you again." He kissed his cheek one last time then closed his eyes, drifting off into a deep sleep; never realizing that the man next to him was shedding silent tears. It was like that for a long time before an emotionally spent Shawn drifted off to sleep; his heart and soul more troubled than ever before.

**~**~**~**

"So what do you think John wants?" Adam asked. He and Randy were at Dave's house in the SC. Dave had a huge game room and they were setting up for a long day of poker and hold 'em.

"I don't know," Dave answered. "Why are you assuming something's wrong? What's wrong with a little midday poker?" He set the cooler full of beers near the card table then he heard the ring of his bell. "Ahh must be him now."

"I'll get it," Adam said eagerly running for the door. He pulled the door open with a wide, mischievous grin on his face. "John. How I've missed you!"

John rolled his eyes, pulling off his hat. "Whatever hot shot. Am I allowed in or not? I'm in the mood to take people's money – especially yours."

"Wow. Fine grouch. Come on in." He moved to let the larger man pass him frowning as he walked by. John was missing something very important but he decided to wait and bring it up at the table.

"Hey Dave…Randy," John nodded. He took a seat in his usual chair followed shortly by the others.

"I'm dealing first," Adam grinned. "I get the feeling today's going to be my lucky day."

"Oh come off it Adam. John always kicks your ass and you know it," Randy retorted.

"Tch…Randy you're the worst boyfriend ever. You're supposed to be on my side."

"And what makes you think you're the perfect boyfriend?" Dave teased. "You stay in trouble because of your big mouth and Randy's always having to bail you out."

"Shut up!" Adam huffed. He shuffled the deck and started passing out cards mumbling obscenities under his breath.

"Aww…is Adam pissed off?" John teased. "You have no reason to be pissed. Randy's still with you so the way I see it, you got it made; a boyfriend who doesn't care how many bad qualities you have." Both Dave and Randy snickered at this but Adam seemed genuinely angry.

"Oh. So you think that's funny huh?"

"Yeah we do," Randy laughed. "But you know I love you so don't take it so seriously babes."

"Yeah well its not like I'm the only one who stays in trouble a lot. Seems to me that another certain blonde stays in a heck of a lot more trouble than me," he hinted, sorting through his hand. John shot him an angry glare but chose not to respond. He wasn't in the mood to fight. In fact, his entire reason for being here was to hang out with friends and forget about Shawn but Adam wasn't making it easy.

"Adam let it go," Dave replied. "We're here to have fun. Not to tally up all the times our lovers have gotten into trouble. Besides, sometimes it's not _entirely_ their fault."

"Whatever man," Adam grumbled. "Take up for the blonde that everybody has a thing for."

"Adam stop it," Randy warned. "You're trying to pick a fight with John that's totally unnecessary. I realize that you do it every time we play poker but give the man a break."

"It's alright Randy," John said finally. "I can speak up for myself and for your information Mr. Punching Bag for a Deadman, Shawn and I aren't seeing each other anymore."

Gasps, cards falling, sputtering, and incoherent sentences as they all tried speaking at once. John quickly held up his hand hating that he let the words slip from his mouth. He wasn't planning on saying anything – at least not to them. The only people that knew were Mark and Chris. He was relying on them to explain it to everyone when they asked but it was too late. He sighed. "Yes. Shawn and I are through. No, he didn't leave me. I left him and before you ask it wasn't anything personal. I loved him and he loved me but I'm just not good enough for him."

All the guys remained eerily silent just staring back and forth between one another. None of them figured Shawn and John would last. It was just too weird seeing them together. None of them ever believed John was good enough for Shawn. At the same time, John was the stupidest person in the world right now. Shawn was everybody's dream man. For Shawn to choose John over the likes of Hunter, Chris and Cena made John the single luckiest son of a bitch in the world so why give that up?

Dave was the first to break the silence. He looked over at John, frowning slightly. "You're pulling my leg right? I just know you're fucking with me."

John rolled his eyes. He expected that kind of reaction and unfortunately for Dave and the others, he was serious. He shook his head. "I'm not kidding. Just ask Chris…and Mark."

"Wait a second, Mark knows?" Adam exclaimed.

"Yeah he knows. I told him before I told anyone else."

"So how come we didn't hear about this?" Randy asked, still trying to grasp the bit of info. "News usually travels fast in our line of work so forgive me if I'm not so quick to believe you. Shawn…where is Shawn? How did he take this? I'm sure it wasn't good so why aren't you somewhere hiding from Hunter…" Randy's voice trailed off and he looked at Adam, his face wearing a grim expression.

"You…are you _hiding_ from Hunter?" Adam asked, a bit of panic in his voice. "John, tell me this is all a ploy to get back at me for earlier. I mean, I'm sorry for taking shots at Shawn. You know I've always been jealous of him and the attention he gets but this isn't funny anymore."

John remained silent for several long seconds. He dropped the cards in his hand and reached for a beer. He stared at the can well aware of the eyes boring into him from around the table. Finally, he managed to clear his throat and began speaking softly. "I always knew I'd pay for all the bad things I've done in my life. The beating I took from Hunter was nothing compared to how I felt when I walked out that door leaving him behind. But I had to. He deserves someone better than me. He deserves to be with someone who loves him just as much he loves them. That better man…is Bret," he managed before bringing the can to his lips drinking the cool, comforting substance that he hadn't touched in months.

"John…man have you finally lost it?" Adam asked. "You think Bret – as in Bret _Hart_ – you think _he's_ the better man? He and Shawn haven't spoken in years let alone laid eyes on each other so I highly doubt—

"Bret's in Stamford with Shawn," John answered. All the guys looked at John, their faces twisted in confusion. "God you guys are always last to know _every_thing!" he snapped irritably. "Look, the rock star himself decided that it was a good idea to interview Shawn and Bret about Montreal so that's where they are now; in some small room at headquarters reliving their past."

"And you let him go through with it?" Randy asked incredulously.

"Let…" John scoffed. "I pushed him to do it."

"Oh my _God_ John. What the hell? What made you do a stupid thing like that?" Adam asked.

John merely shrugged. "It was for his own good."

"You know John, I'm not one for getting into other people's business but right now I'm really wanting to slap you something silly. What the hell were you thinking?"

"I'm just doing what's right by him."

"No, you're just punking out," Adam answered.

"And you're starting to sound like a few other guys I know," Dave said coldly. "Doing what's best for Shawn huh? I thought we settled this the night you got your ass kicked."

"Dave…" John warned but he was cut off.

"No. Dude I don't want to hear anymore of this because it's stupid. You sent your boyfriend to reminisce with his first love and for what? Because you felt like it was for his own good? Did we not just establish a few months ago that Shawn needs to make his own decisions?"

"And that's what I'm doing," John reasoned. "I'm backing away so he can make a decision."

"Looks more like running to me," Randy snorted.

"I'm not running. You guys just don't understand."

"Yes we do," Adam answered. "Trust me. We know. We can see it in your eyes. You're running away because you're afraid of losing."

"I'm NOT afraid of losing to him," he yelled. "I just…know Bret's going to win in the end so I'm ending the fight before it starts."

"Oh my God John! What the hell?" Randy shook his head. "You're killing me man. What makes you think Bret's the better man?"

"You all aren't stupid," John spat. "You knew what was going on with me Shawn. You saw the bruises, the black eyes, the scars…" His throat knotted up and he shut his mouth for fear of crying. He didn't want to cry in front of them. Not now not ever. He grabbed another beer and went to town on it while his friends watched him in silence, each one trying to wrap their heads around the situation. After a while, Adam couldn't stay quiet anymore. This was not the John he knew and he was going to get to the bottom of this.

"Just…out of curiosity, why _exactly_ did you push Shawn to do the interview in the first place? Certainly not to send him off to be with Bret."

"No…I just felt like they had some unfinished business." He sighed. "Part of the reason he took that deal to begin with was because he feared for Bret's life…"

"_Ok. So…so since I'm pretty much a slave for the next five months – give or take –you're going to take care of your slave's basic needs."_

"_That's right."_

"_And there's this small chance I won't have to continue to take shit from you for five months."_

"_Slim chance, but a chance none the less," he shrugged._

"_Right. So on the surface it seems like one hell of a deal. The papers…everything looks fine to me but you…," he sighed shaking his head. "I just don't know how I feel about… You tell me that I have to devote myself to you but how much John? How far are you going to take this whole 'male companion' thing as you call it? What kind of horrors do I need to expect?"_

"_Well you'll just have to take the deal and find out but before you say no, ask yourself this? Is your mother really worth it? Is your lifelong dream of helping those poor, homeless kids really worth it? Or your life…Bret's life…is it…"_

"_ALRIGHT!" Shawn snapped. "You've made your point."_

"He signed those papers without even a second thought," John finished.

"So that made you think he still loved Bret?" Dave asked.

"Yeah it did and when he came back from the first interview session, it was written all over his face. Something happened between the two of them and it's got him feeling uneasy."

"So what? He's still _your_ man!" Adam exclaimed.

"Yeah well he kissed him back."

"Come again?"

"Bret kissed him and Shawn kissed him back. Apparently Bret still loves him and wants him back."

"And you're just going to give him what he wants?" Adam exclaimed furiously. "No. No way. John…I can't even stand to look at you right now," Adam said coldly.

"I know you aren't harpin' on me hot shot. Were you not one of the ones that raped him a few months ago?"

"Yeah but I've been paying for it everyday," Adam snapped back. "I feel terrible about it and when I saw how you looked at him…carried him out the room that night, I cried for several nights. I knew then that you cared for him just like you care for him now. You love him to death. You love him so much that you don't even realize how much you've changed for the better."

"But my happiness means nothing to me right now Adam!" he snapped back. Slamming his hands on the table, he stood to his feet glaring angrily at all three of them. "Now you listen to me. You're right. I _have_ changed. When Shawn came into my life, he taught me to care about others more than myself. He made me feel worth loving and in turn I fell in love with him. He promised to make me happy and he has yet to let me down and asks for nothing in return. All the days we've been together I have been trying to figure out a way to insure his happiness and when he came in from that interview today, I just knew it wasn't over between him and Bret. I don't know Bret at all but he must have been something special if Shawn loved him enough to put up with the shit I put him through. Now you say I'm running and you say I'm a _coward_? I am none of those things. If anything I am crazy in love with the world's most perfect man and I'm giving him a chance to grow old with the one he truly loves. That man can't possibly be me and you know it. I'm just JBL. The rich, stuck-up stock broker that everyone hates. No one would _dare_ deem me worthy of love. I couldn't possibly be good enough for Shawn."

John put on his hat and exited the room without another word. He waited until he was in the back of his limo before allowing his clouded eyes to spill over with tears. _It's for his happiness… Just like he did for me… _And he cried for a long time until he fell asleep, thinking only of the blonde he loved so much.

**~xx~**

"_There are three kinds of love, - unselfish, mutual, and selfish. The unselfish love is of the highest kind. The lover only minds the welfare of the beloved and does not care for his own sufferings. In mutual love the lover not only wants the happiness of his beloved but has an eye towards his own happiness also. It is middling. The selfish love is the lowest. It only looks towards its own happiness, no matter whether the beloved suffers weal or woe." __**~ Ramakrishna**_

_**

* * *

**_AN:Whew! Yeah, you know it. Pain in the ass and Shawn was not making this easy. Wasn't wanting to cooperate at all and then I was drawing a blank because my ending keeps changing. Not the winner but the actual situation leading up to the ending. Gahh...I'm ready to finish this one up. LOL 

I got a couple of people requesting Shawn/Bret OSTs for HBKronicles. I can't do any Shawn and Bret's until I finish this story. Otherwise I'd be glad to do some. So for now, Im avoiding Bret like the plague and he knows it. Think that's all. Will probably be a long time before this gets updated again but it cant be helped. 

DK, if I start a Matt Hardy story I'm blaming YOU! Matt muse is kicking my brain for a story and you won't believe who he wants. Sheesh. I'll grant him his wish later. WF4, you know I wuvs you :D vadg...chisato, I know you're hurting right now but I'm trying. Jibble's not making this easy either. And guess what? I love Mike Adamle. I love him with Randy Orton and I hope the internet rumors are right about him being the guest host of Raw soon. I will squeal like the crazy fangirl I am if he and Randy have a moment. Yes, I like 'Radamle' and if you don't then you're missing out.

Thanks to ALL of you who reviewed the last chapter. I do check the reviews and I appreciate every one. They motivate me to keep crying over this fic but as long as you like it then it's worth it. Love to all of you!

**FYI:** I think you should read the following:

**_Despise by vadg_** - _The most beautifully written Shawn and JBL fic I've ever read. I am picky about JBL now but he's done so well and so is my Shawny that...Gah. So sweet!_

**_In A Gadda Da Vidda by wrestlefan4_** - _The title made me laugh until I read the actual text. It stars Chris, Christian, Adam, The Hardyz and many, many more. Very emotional read but it's very, very good._ _It's so gripping and reads like a movie._

**_A Melding of Bodies and a Mending of Hearts by Dark Kaneanite & wrestlefan4_** - _Two of the most amazing writers on the internet period. I've got to go back and review the chapters I've read but Matt Hardy and Chris Jericho are just another guilty pleasure to add to my long list of guilty pleasures. READ THIS FIC. You'll love it! Read all three of them. I promise you will enjoy them._


	20. Adam's Fury

The room remained eerily silent for a while, each man taking in the shocking news of John and Shawn's separation. Six months ago they would have just shrugged it off and cut each other "I told you so" looks but not today, especially knowing that both men were so head over heels for the other. Why? Why did they break up? That was their initial question. They expected something simple from John. "I hate Shawn." Or maybe even, "Hunter broke us up". That is what Adam would have guessed but he couldn't have been more wrong. Much like Randy and Dave, Adam was a little more than shocked to hear Bret was the cause of all this, especially since it was universally known that Shawn and Bret hated each other. _They hate each other but not really?_ Adam sighed.

"What are you thinking about baby?" Randy asked. He and Dave were quiet, lost in their own thoughts though Randy couldn't help but watch his baby's face. Adam seemed troubled by this news even though he and Shawn were never exactly close. "Adam?"

"Hn?" He looked up. "Oh I'm sorry," he answered. "I just…I'm trying to make myself understand this."

"Don't worry yourself too much about it. This is between John and Shawn no matter how stupid John seems to be right now."

Adam shook his head. "I…I know but Randy…baby this makes no sense. Now I know I've been around longer than you but in all the years I've been wrestling, it's been universally known that Shawn hates Bret and vice versa."

"Yeah that's true baby but Shawn and Bret's history is a lot more complicated than you think."

"Yeah Randy's right," Dave nodded. "When we were part of Evolution, Trips used to slip up and tell us things all the time about him and Shawn. Bret's name came up a couple of times too but you could tell that he didn't too much care for the former star either."

"But I just…"

"Let it go Adam," Dave said lazily. "You really don't want to go there. Bret's relationship with Shawn has always been a taboo topic so you really should just let it go."

"Fine," Adam said rolling his eyes. "But I want to know the story."

"What story?"

"The story of Shawn and Bret. I want to know how they hooked up and everything," Adam answered. "These two…I mean I've always heard that they were lovers once but what happened? What went wrong?"

"Adam some things are better left unsaid," Dave replied. "And I highly doubt Shawn will tell you anything. You two hate each other."

"Not anymore," Adam grinned. "Besides, I was thinking of asking Hunter."

"Oh no you don't," Randy warned. "He probably has no idea that Bret's in town and if you knew what I knew about Hunter's feeling towards Bret, you'd stay out of it."

"Yeah. What he said," Dave said waving a finger.

"But I need to know!" Adam insisted. "John's one of my best friends. We've had our share of problems but nothing too serious. I really want to help!"

"Adam—

"No, Dave listen to me. You have no idea how much Shawn means to John. He's such a different person now. Before Shawn, John was cold, calculating, and down right cruel. He didn't give a shit about anyone outside his inner circle and he was unhappy. He…he would get himself drunk out of his mind passing out in bars. He hated himself," Adam said softly. "It was… You guys didn't see him. You don't know what he was going through… You only saw what he wanted you to see. All of it – tough guy exterior and all – was just an act!"

"We understand what you mean Adam but you really shouldn't get so involved," Randy said. "Nothing good ever happens when we or anyone else tries to help."

"Yeah well I'm not Hunter," he grumbled. "I _know _how to do things without resorting to violence."

"That's because you're not much of a threat," Dave snickered.

"Oh so you think this is funny huh?" Adam snapped. "Well you just wait. I won't let John do this to himself. He needs Shawn." _More than you think he does…_

_**~*--*--*~**  
_

Shawn's eyes fluttered open after sleeping barely an hour. He was still curled up in bed though slightly comforted by the arm around his torso. He smiled. _John…_ Shawn shifted, rolling over to face his love when… _No!_ Shawn scrambled out of bed so quickly that he almost fell on his face having tripped on the sheet. Bret rolled over on his side, mumbling something incoherent in his sleep but he did not awaken. It was all Shawn could do not to burst into tears again and then he felt it, the cool air from the vents tickling his naked body making him tremble. He folded his arms across his chest and just stood there, trembling all over all the while staring at the raven haired form lying in the bed. It wasn't supposed to be this way. None of this should have happened. Bret hated him and he hated Bret yet here he was standing there naked next to the bed, hating himself for letting this happen. He wasn't supposed to allow this to happen. Bret wasn't supposed to get to him like he used to but John had been right from the start and he hated it.

Shawn choked back a sob and turned away from the bed staring at the door. He wouldn't even be in this situation had he just told Chris to shove it and skipped the interview. He knew in his heart that agreeing to such a thing would have more than enough negative effects but he had no choice. He had to do it to prove to John just how much he loved him and yet… _Did I do all this for nothing?_

Shawn bit his lip. He wanted to leave and get as far away from the room and Bret as possible but where would he go? He had no one else. To go running to Chris would only make things worse because right now he really hated Chris with a passion. And then there was Hunter… No doubt Hunter would be more than happy to come running to his rescue but at what price? Hunter hated Bret about as much as he hated John the night he hurt him. _If he were to find out about Bret…_ Shawn pulled his arms tighter round his chest. Now was not the time to go running to Hunter and truth be told, he was sure that was the worst idea in the history of Shawn bad ideas. It was no secret that Hunter hated Bret and had hated him since day one, but it was his own fault… At least it was according to Kevin.

Shawn could no longer stand the cold air so very quietly he approached the bed and pulled the sheet away from Bret. Bret shifted again but still did not wake up which was a relief to Shawn. He did not want to see let alone talk with Bret so after confiscating the sheet, he wrapped it around his body and moved to curl up on the couch. He pulled the sheet close to his face breathing deeply to calm his nerves. For a moment he almost whiffed John's favorite cologne but he was wrong. It was all in his head much like his relationship with Bret had been years ago. Shawn frowned. If he wouldn't have run out on Chris earlier then the Universe would have received a real look at his relationship with Bret. Sure they were supposedly in love but after they returned to the states, so much changed. It was such a 360 that if it wasn't for Kevin's friendship, he would have completely lost it. Shawn closed his eyes, digging deep into the back of his mind. _Kevin…_ Right now would have been a perfect time to have Kevin all of a sudden appear back in his life.

**~*~*~**

It had been almost a month since the trip overseas and to say that things were tense would have been an understatement. Of course Shawn knew it was going to be like this but not exactly to this degree. If he saw Bret in the locker room he was deeply engaged in his conversations with brothers and made no attempt to look up or acknowledge his presence. It was the same way after the shows. Whereas before it was okay to linger around afterwards and strike up a conversation, apparently that was also taboo now. And now it was the start of a new month and Shawn was about to have his match against Davey for the Intercontinental Championship at the next pay per view. He never thought the day would actually come and now that it was nearing, he should have been more than happy about it…but he was not. In fact, he couldn't have been more depressed about it. He and Marty used to joke about becoming single's stars all the time. Shawn always figured Marty would be around when he finally won one of the big ones and they would celebrate afterwards to show that all of their sacrifices had not been in vain.

Shawn rolled over on his side and sighed. Things would not seem so bad to him if he could at least talk to Bret but it looked as if Bret was going to stay away for good now. Shawn knew it would be like this. Somehow he just knew that he was going to be tossed to the side. Sure Bret may have said the words "I love you", but it wasn't enough to make him risk his image and anyway Shawn still wasn't sure how to take Bret's declaration of love. Each time he said those words was during a time of great passion and Shawn knew all too well that there was a chance that Bret's words really meant nothing. _His words may have meant nothing, but my subtle hints meant everything. I really do love him…I think._ Shawn sighed. Once again life came back to bite him on the butt bringing him back from his fantasy world and into the real world. He should have been used to it by now but he thought Bret would be the exception. _Listen at me. I'm being a selfish brat. I have no right to make a man lose his dignity because of a one night stand. Get over him Shawn and move on. _Shawn told himself this yet a part of him knew it wasn't going to be so easy.

Shawn grabbed the remote off his nightstand and started flipping through the channels. He finally stopped on the new competition that was WCW. Some guy who called himself Vinnie Vegas was about to be interviewed. Shawn quirked his brow for he was attempting to figure out what to make of the guy. He was dressed pretty normal; just some jeans and a wife beater. Nothing special, but he was huge. Not huge as in fat but huge as in a giant. The way he walked over to his interviewer hinted that he had a kind of tough guy personality, something Shawn knew nothing about since he was never a tough guy. But his appearance…

Vinnie – what a dreadful name! – Vegas carried himself like the cool guy that nobody fucks with. Then he started cutting his promo. It took all the blonde had not to pass out from laughing. Not that his mic skills were terrible, but he certainly wasn't expecting a bouige Brooklyn accent from a guy like him. But the thing is, the more he watched him the more drawn to him he became. And then it hit him. _I could really use a guy like him around. He's so funny… And huge… I want him. But what would I…? _Shawn frowned. It wouldn't be all that difficult to convince Vince to hire him. This Vinnie guy was huge and Vince was all about big guys. _How the hell can I use him? I want him to be aligned with me… _Shawn watched Vinnie grab the interviewer by the neck and shove him away. Then he snatched up the mic and cut a rant about messing with his boys. _Boys… Guys…_ Shawn sat up in bed with a huge grin on his face. He knew just what to do with Vinnie. Shawn grabbed the phone off his nightstand.

"Yeah clerk? I need to talk to Vince McMahon…"

**-xx-**

For the first time in weeks Shawn was actually glad to be at the arena. He was a week away from winning the belt from Davey and now he was actually excited about it. When Shawn entered the arena, he headed straight for Vince McMahon's office. He burst through the door without bothering to knock. He was just that excited.

"Hey Vince is he…" He stopped mid sentence when he saw that Vinnie was in fact standing there in the flesh. He was towering over Vince McMahon looking kind of nervous while the boss spoke to him.

Vince looked over at Shawn and smiled. "I was wondering when you'd get here."

"Oh I…"

"Shawn don't you think you should formally introduce yourself? You're the one who wanted him you know." Vinnie looked over at Shawn with a surprised look on his face and then he smiled. Shawn felt his face heating up but he ignored it, walking over to meet the bigger man.

"Hi. I'm…I'm—

"Shawn," he finished, shaking his hand. "I know you…well, not really but I've watched quite a few of your matches. You're good – _really_ good. I'm a fan," he grinned. Shawn's face felt hotter than ever which meant he was sure he looked like a cherry right about now.

"Thanks," he managed. "I'm a fan too but I'm sure you know that now thanks to Vince."

The boss smiled. "Don't thank me. It was your idea to bring him over and I'm really glad you did. I could use more guys like you," he nodded at Vegas. "But…" He sighed. "I'm not trying to get us off on the wrong foot but your Vinnie Vegas name needs changing. I'm not sure to what yet but I don't want you to keep it. We're starting fresh and I want you to have a brand new start as well. Get my drift?"

Vinnie nodded. "Sure and please. Call me Kevin. I really hate the name Vinnie."

"Kevin…It suits you," Shawn noted.

"Shawn, just out of curiosity, what _exactly_ did you have in mind for Kevin here? What did you plan on using him for?"

"Well…this I going to sound stupid Vince but I really just wanted someone to hang out with. I figured he looked decent enough on screen that you might hire him and then we could go from there once he got here."

Vince raised a brow casting him a knowing, fatherly look. "I would ask but I think I already know. You're lucky I've taken a liking to you - not to mention your ring work is flawless." Vince shook his head. "Even so he still has to have something Shawn. He can't just appear onscreen next to you without—

"Bodyguard," Kevin answered.

"_Bodyguard_?" Vince repeated. He didn't sound so sure.

"Yeah bodyguard," Kevin replied. "You see I've noticed that Shawn doesn't have Sherri with him anymore and so I could easily replace her as a bodyguard to Shawn rather than a manager. I'm big enough to be seen as a real threat and with Shawn's big match coming up soon, I'm sure I could be used in some form or another to help him out until we come up with a new name for me."

"I like that!" Shawn replied, his eyes lighting up. "Bodyguard… It would really stroke my ego as The Heartbreak Kid."

"See? He likes it," Kevin shrugged. "So…how 'bout it Vince?"

Vince stared between the two of them. Kevin looked a little more than eager to begin work while Shawn looked both relieved and nervous. _I guess it'll be alright. Maybe Kevin can help him with his confidence problem and take care of him in the back as well… _"Like I said Shawn, you're lucky I really like you."

"So... Can I have Kevin? _Please_?" he begged, poking out his lips in a pout.

Vince just rolled his eyes. "Fine," he mumbled. "Now get going. You're making me soft…damn blonde."

Shawn ran over to Vince and kissed his cheek before grabbing Kevin by the hand. "Let's go!"

**~*~*~**

Shawn smiled and held the sheet closer to him. That day was one of the best days of his life. Kevin was the perfect person to enter into his life at the time and just thinking about that day made Shawn smile. Kevin was huge and had half the locker room whispering about him. He didn't care though and neither did Shawn, which was a good thing…

"I'm sorry Kevin."

Kevin took a seat across from Shawn straddling the bench. He reached over a pulled a piece of hair out of his face and was suddenly hit with the most beautiful blue eyes he'd ever seen. "Sorry for what?"

Shawn looked around nervously not bothering to meet his gaze as he answered. "The hushed whispers. I know you hear them and I'm sorry. I probably should have told you before that I'm the most talked about person on the roster but I was afraid you wouldn't wanna sign with us if you knew the truth."

"Hey…look at me." Kevin ran his hand alongside Shawn's face shocked by how smooth his skin was. He raised his chin forcing eye contact. "Don't be sorry. You rescued me from that other place and I owe you. Besides, who the fuck cares if they talk about you? They can talk but they better not even _think_ of putting their hands on you or I'll do them in. I'm your bodyguard. It's my job to protect you and I will."

Shawn finally managed a weak smile. "Thanks."

"So…just out of curiosity, did you really just want a friend? And be honest. I promise I won't get mad."

Shawn looked around the locker room and noticed that Owen and Davey were looking their way staring at them. He averted his eyes shaking his head. "I uh…don't really have any friends. I know this shouldn't be a problem since I'm a guy," he mumbled. "But I'm not exactly the most manly of men…if you know what I mean," he replied nervously, his face flushing a light shade of pink.

Kevin only chuckled. "I kind of figured that. You're much too pretty to be a guy-guy. It wouldn't suit you."

"I guess not."

"So…are you…you know, into other guys?"

"I'm not sure," he answered, which was the truth. "Not like I've had much choice in the matter."

Kevin frowned. "What does that mean?"

"I…" Shawn never had any desires to sleep with a man before Bret, and Marty was just a one time thing. Kenneth on the other hand was a business arrangement and whenever they had sex he didn't think much of it except that it was all for Marty. Shawn didn't even realize that he was starting to cry until he felt Kevin's fingers wiping his face.

"Shawn?"

"I had a friend once," Shawn started, his voice almost a whisper. "He was my tag team partner and when he left I was all alone. I would tell you what happened to us but I can't. It's too…" His voice trailed off and he looked away. He knew that they were still being watched because he could feel their eyes burning a hole in his skin. It was starting to make him nervous. A second later the locker room door opened again and in walked Bret. He didn't even look their way as he headed to his corner to laugh and chat with his family.

"Well…so that must be big bad Bret Hart," Kevin noted. "I'm guessing he runs things around here."

"Guess so," Shawn mumbled. He stood up and went back to his locker to comb through his hair some more. He knew he was still being watched and now that Bret was in the room, Shawn could hardly breathe under their watchful eyes. It was rare these days that the two of them were ever in the same room. Usually if one was in the room, the other would find an excuse to leave immediately until the other one left. It was pretty childish but it wasn't like Shawn had much choice in the matter. Bret was making their friendship an issue which was why they never talked anymore. Shawn knew he loved Bret very much and he was willing to put it aside for the sake of their friendship rather than throw it all away. However, Bret wasn't as willing as Shawn thought he might be. _That's what I get for giving in…_

"Hey Shawn?"

"Hn?"

Kevin moved off the bench and was now standing behind the blonde admiring his long hair as he brushed through it. He casually glanced towards the Hart corner and noticed that Bret was staring their way with a curious look on his face. Kevin smirked. "I just wanted to say that I see what you mean."

"About what?" he asked.

"Hushed whispers though it's not as bad as the staring."

"Yeah well you'll get used to it."

"Yeah but I never figured Bret would be one of them. Does he hate you like all the others?" Shawn dropped his brush, stooping over nervously to pick it up. He turned around to face Kevin giving him his best blank look.

"Why you ask?"

"Because he's been staring our way for a long time." Shawn looked over towards the Hart corner with every intention of just glancing but when his eyes met Bret's he somehow became paralyzed. "Shawn?"

"Uh…huh?" He blinked and then shook his head. "Yeah Bret. He's…okay I guess. Let's get out of here alright? I need some air. Stay close to me please?"

Kevin looked down into Shawn's eyes and caught the hint of pleading in them. Though his eyes were gorgeous the beauty did nothing to mask the hurt that he was trying to hide. _He really needs my help and judging from the way he reacted to Bret means there's something going on… _Kevin rustled the top of his head playfully. "Yeah. Let's get out of here. Lead the way baby girl."

**~*--*--*~**

Adam stood outside Mark's door tapping his foot impatiently. "Dammit Mark! Hurry up! This is important!"

The door suddenly swung open and a pissed off Taker was towering over him in nothing but some boxers. "What?! And why the _hell_ are you visiting me? Shouldn't you be on a plane for Monday Night Raw?"

Adam ignored Mark and pushed his way past him into his hotel room. Normally Adam wouldn't have done such a thing but he felt like this was important enough to risk another beat down from The Deadman. Adam took a seat on the couch only to jump back up again. He had too much nervous energy built up and sitting wasn't going to help. Mark stared at a pacing Adam for a minute half wondering if he was high or something before breaking the silence. "Adam. What do you want? You're interrupting my 'me' time if you get my drift. I'm on vacation and I don't need trouble makers like you ruining it with drama."

"Mark I have to help him. I have to help John," he said quickly, almost tripping over his own feet.

"No. What you need to do I calm the fuck down and sit before you hurt yourself."

"Sorry but I can't help it. I just got some news – the wrong kind of news – and it's making me twitchy."

"What kind of – Are you talking about John's break up with Shawn?"

Adam suddenly stopped pacing and frowned. "Of course that's what I'm talking about!" he snapped. "But…but what I don't get is why he told _you_ of all people before he told me – his best friend!"

"Because he knew you'd react like a fool," Mark replied lazily. He shoved Adam down on the couch then settled next to him. "Why?" he asked. "Why does this bother you so much?"

"Because John was happy!" Adam exclaimed. "For the first time in his miserable life he was truly fucking happy and now he's just throwing it all away! I can't – help me understand why he'd do this. I got my ass kicked a few moths ago by YOU over Shawn and now he's just going to let Bret win? I don't… I don't get it."

Mark sighed. "I don't understand it either Adam but you should know better than all of us what John must be feeling right now. He let his boyfriend be alone with his first love knowing full well of the risks. A part of him hoped that Shawn would return to Bret but at the same time, I'm sure deep down he never really wanted to give him up."

"Then why—

"Because John feels like he needs to make up for past mistakes."

"But Shawn forgave him!" he insisted.

Mark held up his hand. "I know," he soothed. "Shawn has the power to change people. John became a better person when Shawn walked into his life and I believe in my heart that John just wants what's best for Shawn. Right now he's probably feeling overwhelmed with so many emotions. Fear, hope, regret, guilt – and that's just a start. Try to understand Adam. No matter what you and I do, in the end it's going to come down to what Shawn wants. Only Shawn knows what's important to him."

"But what if they both are?"

"I'm sure they both mean something to him but no matter what you and I do, we can't make decisions for him."

"Alright. Fine. Then answer me this: how do _you_ feel about Bret?"

"How I feel isn't important."

"Liar! I know you care one way or the other because you love him to. You've always loved Shawn just like Hunter so I'm sure—

"Adam you're pushing your luck," Mark growled. "Look. Let it go. You're only stirring the pot and if you keep this up things are bound to get ugly. We don't want a repeat of what happened before Mania so just stop it."

Adam remained silent for the next few minutes giving Mark hope that he'd finally gotten through to him. Adam's face slowly relaxed and so did his posture meaning he was finally calm. Mark stood to his feet. "You want a soda or something?"

"No. I'm…I'm fine," he mumbled. "Say Mark?"

"Hn?"

"I'm still going to pursue this with or without anyone's help. It's not that I don't like Bret. Everyone on the roster knows that Bret is my idol, but I have to do this. I have to make sure that John's doing the right thing."

"Fine Adam. Do what you want but I don't want any part of it."

"That's fine. I'm gonna go talk with Chris anyway. I'm hoping he'll let me in on the interview. If I could just hear the truth about Montreal… I get the feeling that something's not right with Bret. I'm sure he still loves Shawn but I have my own theories about this."

"Care to tell me All Knowing One?"

Adam started for the door. "Nope. You'll know when I know for sure. In the meantime put some fucking clothes on. You look like a fucking zombie."

"Go to hell," he mumbled just as the door closed. When Adam was long gone Mark went back to his bed and crawled across it. He wished he could help Adam but there was just know way he was getting into this if he could help. Sure he saw some things that occurred between Bret and Shawn years ago but it wasn't his place to get involved. Years ago though there were several occasions where he wanted to intervene but like now, it wasn't his place. Only one time did he ever get himself involved but that was a story best kept buried in the back of his mind. _Good luck Adam. You're in for one hell of a ride._

_

* * *

_AN: Sorry about the jumping around but it couldn't be helped. Hope you could read everything alright.

If you have not seen videos of Kevin Nash before he became the hot, Big Daddy Cool Diesel aka Kevin Nash, you should really take time out of your day to look him up. His first character was so damn bad that I was literally crying and gasping for air for all of a day. It was just that bad. 'Oz' was Kevin's first gimmick and trust me when I say, it was dreadful. Vinnie Vegas wasn't so bad. And he had a few other personas but I can't think of them right now.

The story of how Shawn and Kevin met is very true. Shawn stated on his DVD that he had Vince call him up after seeing a promo that Kevin did. Apparently it made him laugh and a day or two later you had one half of the original Kliq. Of course I exaggerated some of the conversations to fit the 'slash' but for the most part it's all true.

Sorry nothing big happened this time around but it's important to know as much as possible before we get to 'Montreal'. I know it's kind of early for this but I'm just going to put it out there. Not everyone is going to agree with what I make of Montreal and you don't have to. Everyone has their own take on it and no one will ever really agree on the subject. But I've spent countless hours going over different versions of the story and I'm sticking to my original ending. I guarantee not everyone will like it but hey, that's what fanfiction is for. You can always write your own happy (or not so happy) ending.

The next chapter or two will pick up with some more Bret and his side of things. Probably some more info on Shawn and Kevin then I'll be introducing Hunter and Razor. We are still a good ways away from the damn Screwjob but I swear I cannot make this story shorter. I've been trying and failing miserably so no telling when the damn thing will be finished. In the meantime, read some of those fics I recommended in other chapters. I promise you will thank me later. The next update? Ha Ha I have no idea.

**FYI: You should read:**

1) _**In a Gadda Da Vidda by wrestlefan4 **_- _If you're reading this angst fest then you should def read this fic. You angst and tear jerker addicts will love it. Not to mention its a great fic all around. It star Chris Jericho, Edge, Christian and Matt. There are a ton of wrestlers in the fic so check it out._

2) _**Found by wrestlefan4**_ - _I'm sorry but she's such a great writer and besides, I KNOW you'll love this one. It stars Bret Hart and Shawn Michael. 'Nough said right?_


	21. Meeting of Rivals: Hunter's Debut

When Chris finally made it back to his room, he hesitated to even go inside. Not because of Mike but mainly because he was worried about Shawn. The blonde simply tore out of the room at a lightening pace. Chris wasn't entirely sure why Shawn left but something about the look on his face screamed JBL. He was going to check on him but Bret offered to go instead. Whether that was a good thing or a bad thing, Chris didn't know. He just hoped for everyone's sake that Shawn was okay. Chris took a deep breath before entering his room. What he saw made his jaw drop. Mike was completely naked standing near the bed. His back was to Chris and he was seemingly in the process of getting dressed. Mike suddenly turned around to face him and practically jumped out of his skin.

"Oh my God Chris! I…wasn't expecting you for some time," he stammered nervously. His face turned a deep shade of red and he looked absolutely sick. Chris' embarrassment suddenly went away and was replaced by amusement. He clamped his opting for his signature smirk. Mike didn't look half bad in the nude. In fact he looked pretty damn good.

"Wow Mike. You know to be such a runt you don't look half bad like that," he teased. Mike quickly turned away from him and started nervously attempting to put on his boxers. Chris could only laugh at him. "I'm sorry Mike. I couldn't help myself. This morning's been a little intense so forgive me for having a laugh."

Mike finally managed to get his shorts on before he turned to Chris grinning. "It's okay. Glad I could be the source of some smiles. So…not that it's any of my business but you're back a lot earlier than expected. Did you convince them to let the interview go?"

Chris plopped down on the bed, propping his arm on a pillow. He watched a little entranced as Mike lotioned his arms and legs. "Uh…no I didn't. They both insisted that they get it finished so that they could get on with their lives."

"Ahh so it was another morning of painful memories."

"Not…exactly," Chris laughed. "They uh…talked about the morning after their lovemaking. It was kind of funny since Shawn was a bit moody yet strange as well."

"Strange?" Mike frowned.

"Yeah…he uh…apparently John was with him when he got up this morning."

"Huh? Come again?"

"My thoughts exactly considering Mark's the only reliable source on the roster. If he said Jibble's gone then he's gone."

"Then what was up with Shawn? Did he like…dream Jibble was with him this morning?"

"That's what I'm trying to figure out. The interview was cut short when Shawn suddenly tore out of the room like a mad dog. I don't know if something Bret said got him thinking of John but whatever it was, it got the blonde worried about _something_."

"Oh. So why didn't you go after him?" Mike asked with a frown. "I know you still care about him."

"I did but then Bret decided it would probably be best if he went too. I wasn't about to be the third wheel not to mention a part of me has this feeling it was something to do with John. I can't even begin to imagine Shawn's face if he somehow discovered John's M.I.A. That would…I don't want to know."

"Yeah I understand that." Mike finally tugged his shirt over his head and for a moment Chris felt like pouting. He was enjoying the view but he supposed he needed to let that go. He didn't want to creep Mike out or anything. He valued his friendship too much to risk it all because he had a moment of weakness. _The price you pay for not getting laid…_ Chris felt the bed dip and he suddenly realized Miz was lying next to him, his head resting on his hands staring back at him. Chris blinked and then smiled.

"So what do you wanna do for the rest of the day? I'm pretty sure I won't be seeing Bret Michaels any time soon and I really need an excuse to ignore any phone calls. I'd rather not know if Shawn's in a mental facility all because of me."

Mike laughed showing off perfect teeth that Chris never really noticed before. "Well…I don't know if you'd want to go but I was planning to go to the aquarium today."

"Aquarium? As in fish and things I love to eat?"

Mike laughed again. "Yeah. I'm not much of a zoo person but I do love aquariums. Everything about them is so cool. I especially love the colorful fish."

Chris couldn't help but laugh at the kid. His eyes just seemed to light up at the thought of seeing pretty fish. Chris had never actually been to an aquarium so he had no opinion of them. _First time for everything..._ "I think I'd like to go actually."

Mike's jaw dropped. "What? Seriously? You'd go with me?"

"Of course," he smirked. "Unless you had some kind of hot date…"

"No, no, no, no, noooooo. No date."

Chris laughed at him again. He was so cute when he was like this. "No date huh? And why not?"

"I…don't know. Guess I'd rather hang out with you than risk dating. At least with you I know I'm going to have a good time and I'll be treated like a real person."

Chris was almost rendered speechless but he somehow managed to play it off. He reached over and ruffled Mike's hair. "I didn't know you were such a softie," he teased.

"Hey! I'm not that soft! I just…like doing things most guys would find stupid."

"Most guys probably would but then I'm not most guys. In fact, I've never even been to an aquarium before so maybe I'll like it."

"Oh…really?"

Chris shook his head. "Nope. But I imagine it's a cool place to take someone on a date."

"I'd like to think so. It's pretty quiet and the aquarium itself is lit perfectly to give off a romantic vibe."

Chris snorted. "Romantic? God you're such a girl!"

"Don't pick! No one's making you go you know!" he snapped hotly. "And besides, I can't help it if I'm a little sensitive."

"A little?" Chris quirked his brow. "You might be more girly than a few others I know."

"Whatever," he mumbled. Chris reached out pushing his shoulder hard until he fell over on his back.

"Hey! What gives you mindless hypocrite?"

Chris could not stop himself from laughing. "You would call me that." Chris rolled off the bed then proceeded to drag Mike off the bed by his feet. "Come on Tiger. You have a date. Don't wanna disappoint do you?"

"I…a date?" Mike managed to get away before Chris could drag him to the floor but he couldn't really bring himself to move after that. A date? Chris said 'date' but what exactly did he mean by it?

"Hey? Earth to Mike? Are you going to keep your date waiting?"

"What? Oh…no." He forced a grin. "Guess not. You're really going to be my date?"

"Well duh! Now come on before I take you to the zoo."

"Oh hell no! Let's go," he grinned.

**~*--*--*~**

Shawn sat on the sofa still curled up in his sheet, mad as hell at himself for everything that's happened. He knew that it wasn't entirely his fault but he couldn't help but feel so guilty about betraying John. _I need to get out of here… I need to talk with somebody… _The old Shawn would have just called Hunter or Kevin to come and rescue him. They always had a terrible habit of doing so, even when Shawn felt like he didn't need rescuing. Prime example would be the incident with John, but Shawn couldn't just sit there with Bret. Already his brain was about to explode and he was feeling lonelier than ever before.

Shawn tiptoed across the room as quietly as he could and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket then retreated back to the couch. He skimmed through the contacts stopping for several minutes on the one that read "Sweetheart". He had to cover his mouth with his hand to muffle the sound of his cry. _John…_ Sweetheart was the nickname he'd given John though he often settled for calling him 'baby'. Shawn wanted so badly to dial his number but he was sure John wouldn't answer. When John didn't wish to be bothered not even his sister or corporate worker could make him answer the phone. John was always a man of his word and if he meant to give Bret a trying chance then he likely wouldn't answer for several days. Shawn wiped his eyes and opted for another contact instead; the only one who'd listen without freaking out or making things worse. _Come on pick up…_

"What's up?"

"Jeff?"

"Oh my God Shawn! I didn't even think to look at the ID. How are you baby? And here I was thinking it would be Matty," he chuckled.

"Uh…" Shawn lowered his voice to almost a whisper. "I'm…I'm fine. I just needed to hear a friendly voice." Shawn glanced over his shoulder casting a look towards the bed. Bret was still snoring lightly which meant he was still asleep.

"Oh well that's alright sweets. You know I'm always here for you. So uh…what's going on?"

"Nothing," he lied.

"Then why are you talking so softly? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine…just…Bret's sleeping."

"Bret? Bret's sleeping? What the hell has Chris got ya'll doing?"

"Nothing. Chris is gone…probably in his room."

"Oh…and where are you?"

"In the room you and Hunter let me use."

"And Bret's there…with you…_sleeping_?" he asked.

"Yeah. He's uh…in bed."

"Shawn I can't really talk much longer because we're about to start taping but am I right in thinking that Bret's not just sleeping in your room because he wanted a nap?"

"Uh…yeah."

"I'm right?" he hissed. "So…so does that mean…" Jeff's voice trailed off and he waited hoping that Shawn wouldn't say what he was thinking but when he didn't answer he knew it had to be the truth. "I'm sorry Shawn."

"Yeah me too."

"Do you want me to tell Hunter?"

"No. Please. Don't tell anyone Jeff," he pleaded quietly. "I can't…I need to figure things out without people rescuing me. That's kind of why I called you. I knew you wouldn't yell at me or lecture to me. I just…I needed to tell _somebody_ or else I was going to lose it. I'm just so confused Jeff."

"I know you are love. Listen I have to go but you take care of yourself. I am going to call you when I get done taping alright?"

"Alright. And…thanks for listening Jeff."

"Anytime love. Laterz."

**-xx-**

Jeff hung up the phone frowning as he stuffed the object in his bag. He didn't know why but all of a sudden he was feeling an extreme need to go rescue Shawn from Bret. It was probably a little childish considering he didn't know much about Bret but after seeing Shawn so scared the other day, he wasn't sure if he was ready to just let this go. _I now understand why Hunter's so concerned…_ "Hey Jeff. What's with that look? Who was that on the phone?"

Jeff jumped having not expecting to have anyone sneak up on him like that especially since he thought he was alone the whole time. He shrugged it off, flashing JoMo a smile. "I was talking with Shawn."

"Uh huh. So what's up with him? Why would he be calling you right before a taping?" JoMo asked. He was standing in front of a mirror combing through his hair and for a moment Jeff saw his blonde friend instead of the cocky tweener standing near him. Jeff shook his head. "Nothing man. Just wanted to hear a friendly voice."

John turned to him, a look of concern on his face. "Is he doing okay?"

"Why you ask?" Jeff frowned. He wasn't sure how much John knew about the situation so he wanted to be careful. He'd promised Shawn not to say anything to anyone and he had every intention of keeping that promise…sort of.

"Just…Mark's been telling me a lot of things and he tells me because he's worried."

"Things? What _kind_ of things?"

John suddenly looked around the room, quickly opting to take a walk towards the showers to make sure no one else was around. He returned a second later, hesitating a moment before actually speaking. "Just…I don't know Jeff. I know a lot of things. Question is, how much do _YOU_ know about everything?"

"Enough to know that we all need to tread lightly over the next couple of days and it's all Chris' fault."

"I don't know if we should blame Chris for stirring the pot…at least not all the way. John _did_ let Shawn do the interview."

"So you know about Bret and Shawn?"

"Probably more than you but I'm not going to exchange details…at least not here. How's he doing? Certainly better than Chris I hope."

"I don't…how's Chris?" he frowned.

John ran a hand through his hair. "Not…great according to Mizzy. Chris literally had a breakdown last night after ya'll left the room."

"Oh fuck. We don't need _him_ flipping out on us too ya know. Ugh! Can this get any worse?"

"When it comes to Shawn, probably. But we need to get going. Shawn will be alright…I reckon. He's not alone is he?"

"Alone?" Jeff scoffed. "I wish."

"Hunter?" he winced.

"Huh? What? No!" he laughed a little. "Naa…Hunter and I are beyond that. We have an understanding about Shawn. No. Hunter's somewhere brooding."

"Then who's with Shawn?"

"Bret."

"Oh boy."

"My thoughts exactly."

"JEFF?! JOHN?!? WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?! YOU'RE ON IN FIVE!" The door burst open and in walked Glen. "You guys, Vince is about to pop a vein."

"We're coming." John turned to Jeff. "More later," he whispered. Jeff nodded as they broke into a run after Glen.

**~*--*--*~**

Hunter was not in a good mood but that was to be expected. His baby was gone to work; something he would have been doing if he hadn't been drafted back to Raw. No. Instead he was sitting alone in their hotel room attempting to watch ECW. He couldn't quite keep up with what was going on because of images of Bret flashing through his mind. And it didn't help that the Hart Dynasty were making their way down the ramp to the ring. Just hearing that rip from Bret's old theme made his blood boil. Hunter turned the tele off, his resentment getting the better of him. He didn't hate the Dynasty. In fact he'd spoken to David once and the kid seemed genuinely nice. Unfortunately for him, he was part of a group that reminded him too much of other persons – persons that he grew to dislike for personal reasons. _Davey Boy and Bret…what an annoyingly arrogant combo…_

***-x-***

Paul stood outside the locker room watching the other guys nervously. Normally he didn't fear new environments. That just wasn't his thing to be scared. He always took new opportunities or experiences and embraced them but this was an entirely different situation. This was Vince McMahon. The guy that single handedly took out all the wrestling territories. There was nowhere else to go if he fucked up here so hell yeah he was nervous. Vince told him to look for a stunning young blonde named Shawn. Paul almost laughed at the word "stunning". Stunning was not the way you described one of the biggest kept secrets in all of professional wrestling and half thought Vince was joking at first but he supposed not. 

_"You need to get in good with Shawn and his friends. Like you, they are rising stars though one can argue Shawn's already a star. He's quite possibly the best performer I've ever seen and that's a big compliment coming from me. Find him. I'm sure you guys will get along great…unless of course you'd like to try your luck getting in good with the Harts."_

That was Vince's advice and Paul wasn't going to ignore it. He had plans to become a huge star someday but in order to do that you have to network. Of course he wasn't really sure what this Shawn guy looked like and he hoped to God that he wasn't one of the ones blowing him off. He'd been standing outside the locker room for almost an hour and was yet to get a friendly nod from anyone. It could have been the fact that Paul's ring attire and character made him come off as a bit stuck up and rich but that was just a character. In fact he was far from being rich and stuck up. If anything he was probably the coolest guy anyone could ever hope to meet…unless they crossed the line. _I really hope this Shawn guy is worth my time… _

Paul didn't have to wait too much longer before he saw a really tall guy coming up the hall. He was dressed in black leather pants and a leather vest as well. His dark hair complimented his intense, dark eyes and he just had this aura about him that screamed 'fuck off'. For a moment their eyes locked and the big guy nodded his way. Paul, a bit shocked that someone like him was speaking to him, managed a stiff nod back then went back to warming the wall. _Alright Shawn. Where are you?_ "Hey you!"

Paul blinked, not realizing that he'd almost dozed off. Standing before him was the huge guy who acknowledge him a few moments ago. "Oh, hey man."

"What's your name?"

Paul stuck out his hand. "Paul…but uh…guess around here you'd call me Hunter," he grinned.

"Ahh…Hunter." The big guy studied him for a moment as if checking him out. It kind of made Paul a little self conscious but he shrugged it off. The guy before him was huge and he wasn't about to insult him. The guy must have picked up on his uneasiness because he suddenly laughed out loud. "Dude. No worries. I'm not being a creeper. I was just thinking…Vince told me earlier that he had a newbie coming in today. He asked me to let you roll with us. You know, kind of show you the ropes. You seem like a decent guy and since you're the only Hunter around you must be the guy."

"Uh…yeah I am," he managed.

"Cool. My name's Kevin."

"Nice to meet you Kevin," he smiled, shaking his hand. "Uh…well, I have to tell you Vince never said anything about you. He told me to get in with a guy named Shawn but I haven't seen him around. Are you a friend of his?"

Kevin laughed. "_Friend_? Dude I'm his bodyguard!"

"On screen?"

Kevin suddenly frowned. "Both but that's something best discussed later. Not that you're a creep or anything but Shawn's my baby. Not baby in the sense that we're together but…you'll see. The guys know that I'll hurt them if I hear word of them bothering him."

"Wow. Shawn must be very important around here," Paul noted.

"Well not really but he's a really good guy. A little hot headed at times but you learn to deal with it. If you knew what was going on with him, you'd understand why he's a bit…"

"Temperamental?"

Kevin laughed. "Something like that. Say…how about I introduce you to him?"

"Oh that would be great!"

"Well come on," he grinned. Happy to have finally found what he was looking for, Paul eagerly followed Kevin into the locker room. There were several superstars mixing and mingling but you could already tell that cliques had been formed. Paul just hoped he was walking into the right one. "Hey beautiful. I got someone I want you to meet." The "beautiful" guy in question was bent over in the tightest red tights lacing up his boots. Paul was surprised to see how small he was which kind of made him nervous. It was no secret that Vince loved big guys so if this was Shawn, Paul feared he'd have a time taking him seriously. _God I hope Vince didn't just pull one on me…_ His attitude quickly changed when the blonde finally turned around.

"Wow," he breathed, though it was merely a bad case of word vomit. Shawn's long, silky looking hair was hanging freely complimenting a sparkling set of baby blue eyes that had Paul ready to run a marathon for. He expected a lot of things but what he did not expect was for Shawn to look that damn good.

"Hi, I'm Shawn." He stuck out his hand packaged with the most breathtaking smile he'd seen in ages.

"Uh…I'm…"

"This is Paul," Kevin answered for him. "But you can call him Hunter."

"Hunter…I like it," he grinned. "So uh…what's up?"

"Paul here met with Vince earlier today and he told him to hang out with us. I've already threatened to kill him if he decides to become a douche so don't worry your pretty blonde head over him. He just might fit right in."

"Oh cool! Well welcome to the snake pit that is the World Wrestling Federation."

"Snake-pit is one word for it," Kevin mumbled.

"Oh be nice big guy," Shawn scolded. "I'd rather not let him hear you. I'm not in the mood for him today."

"You shouldn't be in the mood for him any day."

"Kevin…don't. Not tonight alright?" he warned.

"Fine. I'll just be over here schooling the rookie."

"You do that."

Kevin pulled Hunter away from Shawn shaking his head. "Stubborn ass male."

"Maybe but damn. I wasn't expecting him to look so…"

"Hot?"

"Well…yeah. He's so…"

"I know what you're going to say and I'm telling you now as a friend, don't. In fact don't even think about his beauty. If you can get past that then you'll be fine."

"Oh like that will be easy to do," he scoffed. Paul cast another glance Shawn's way watching him comb through his hair. Shawn had to be the single most gorgeous man he'd ever laid eyes on.

Kevin sighed. "He's taken Hunter."

That got Paul's attention. "Huh? Come again?"

"He's taken…at least figuratively and before you ask anymore questions I'm telling you now to let it go. Shawn's off limits. Got that?"

"Yeah got it." _I should have known anyway. He's much too pretty to be single… _All of a sudden the doors burst open and in walked four more guys. Three of them were sporting pink and black attire while the other wore trunks that had the British flag embroidered on them. They came in laughing about something or another opting to carry on in their own corner of the room. Paul watched as several superstars quickly exited the locker room giving those guys half the locker room to themselves. This made Paul frown. Just who the hell are those guys?

"That's The Hart Foundation," Kevin mumbled in his ear. "The stout one is Jimmy Neidhart. The short, blonde kid is Owen Hart and standing to his left is his brother, big bad Bret Hart. That's their cousin in the trunks, Davey aka The Bulldog."

"Oh…so—

"Don't stare!" Kevin hissed. He grabbed Paul pulling him back towards Shawn's area and away from watchful eyes. "Not that I'm afraid of them or anything but too many times I've wanted to ring a certain person's neck for personal reasons. I can't because those guys happen to run things around here and with good reason. Jimmy and Bret had tag team gold at one point but now Bret's WWE Champion. Bulldog was the IC Champ until Shawn won it from him. Now he's the European champ while Jimmy and Owen have been chasing the tag belts for the last few weeks."

"Oh I see. So…basically if I want to keep my job…"

"Yep so – What do _you_ want?" Paul turned around and found himself face to face with Bret. His championship belt was being held by his younger brother and all of them were surrounding him and Kevin. Bret was pretty handsome Paul noted, with a striking set of dark eyes. His tan only complimented his dark hair so Paul was impressed.

"Just was going to introduce ourselves to the new guy." Bret stuck out his hand. "I'm sure you know by now that I'm Bret Hart. This is the rest of my family."

Paul shook his hand, forcing a weak smile because for some reason he wasn't sure Bret's intentions were as he claimed. Shawn suddenly squeezed himself between Paul and Kevin moving to stand out front. "Is there a problem?" Shawn asked. Bret looked down at him smirking.

"Oh no. No problem at all. Just getting to know the new guy here."

"No offense Bret but since when do you care about new recruits?" Kevin challenged. Bret's smile faded and the look he cast Kevin screamed 'death'. The tension in the air had risen immensely and for a second Paul wondered if he'd made the right decision. Kevin moved to stand over Bret, both guys staring each other down as if waiting for the other to make a move but Shawn pulled Kevin back. "No…Kevin please…don't…" He moved in front pushing Kevin back. "It's not…"

"One of these days Bret," he growled.

"To get to Bret you'll have to get through us first," Davey grinned.

Kevin made an attempt to get to Davey but Shawn pushed him back. "NO! Kevin…" The guys all turned to leave laughing loudly as they exited the room. The only one who remained was Bret. Shawn spun around to face him, his eyes flashing dangerously. "You…."

Bret smirked as he moved closer towering over the blonde. Shawn's face was turning all shade of red too. Paul wasn't sure what to make of this because in his opinion, Bret was really pushing his luck. He watched as Bret twirled a strand of Shawn's hair before backing away. "See you later princess."

When Bret was finally gone Paul let out a low whistle. "That was interesting."

"Interesting my ass," Kevin growled. "Shawn I don't know why—

"I told you not tonight Kevin!" he snapped. "We have to get going anyway. I have to wrestle Davey tonight so you have my permission to kick his ass and anyone else's if they don't act right during my match alright?" Kevin still didn't look very happy but Shawn seemed to have a way of calming him down. Paul watched as Shawn threw his arms around Kevin kissing his cheek. "Look, I know you mean well and I appreciate it. I love you for everything you do for me. You're the best friend I could ever hope to have, but you know the deal with him. I promise you I'll let you know when I can't deal with it anymore."

"I'm…sorry baby girl." He pulled Shawn into his big, loving arms and it was all Paul could do not to secretly long to be in Kevin's place even though he hardly knew Shawn at all. Kevin raked his fingers through Shawn's hair and sighed. "I just…I hate this. I hate that it has to be this way for you and the way he acts…but I'll do what you say. You know I'll do anything in the world for you."

Shawn looked up at him and smiled. "I know. Now let's get going." Shawn looked over at Paul flashing him a smile that ran all the way through his body. "You coming?"

"Oh…uh…sure…if you'll have me that is."

"Of course. I could use another bodyguard." He winked at Paul before turning to leave. Paul was sure he had the goofiest grin on his face but he didn't care. He was honored to be Shawn's bodyguard. Shawn led the way out of the room followed closely by Kevin then Paul, but when they got outside the door Kevin lingered behind. "I hope this is alright with you," Kevin said.

"Oh the bodyguard thing?"

"Yeah. I mean on screen you don't have to…you know but I could really use your help looking out for him. I know you're a bit skeptical now but just wait til you see him in the ring. Amazing."

"Oh I bet he is not to mention he's so damn pretty."

"Yeah he is," Kevin smirked.

"Um…if you don't mind me asking, what was that scene all about with the Harts? Do they hate him or something?"

"Some of them might."

"But generally speaking, no?" Kevin nodded. "Then what's the deal with Bret? Why was he all in Shawn's face like that and why the _hell_ did Shawn let him get away with that? I know I haven't been here long but I swear something about Bret's attitude tonight rubbed me the wrong way. If that was me I swear to God I'd have decked him. _Princess_?"

Kevin sighed. "I told you Shawn was off limits."

"Yeah I know but—

"Shawn belongs to Bret Paul. Bret and Shawn are lovers."

"WHAT?"

"Yeah and shush. Not so loud," Kevin hissed. "Anyway if you haven't figured it out by now, Bret was probably just 'marking his territory' so to speak. I'm sure he saw the way you were looking at Shawn but he needs to get used to that. Everybody looks at Shawn that way. You can't help it."

"Wow. Bret…and Shawn…" This just completely blew Paul's mind.

"Yeah and I'd advise you in the future to stay out of anything to do with those two. Bret's really not a bad guy from what I can tell, but he's got some major insecurities. Anyway we gotta go. I'll fill you in on things on a need to know basis alright?"

"Right."

***-x-***

Hunter knew on day one that he hated Bret but it was more or less because he had Shawn as a lover. Overtime though he grew to hate Bret because of his 'holier than thou' attitude and treatment of Shawn. Hunter sighed. The longer he sat there alone, the more he'd have time to think of memories, something he's rather not do. He quickly scribbled Jeff a note before leaving the room. He needed to do something otherwise he was going to lose it.

**~*~*~**

Just as Shawn closed his phone, he was greeted with a kiss on the neck. He quickly jumped up turning to glare at Bret. "Don't…touch me," he growled. Bret simply smiled as he took a seat on the couch where Shawn had been sitting.

"Are you going to be this way _all the time_?"

"How else you expect me to act Bret?" he snapped. "You…you—

"Don't blame it all on me princess. You could have stopped me if you didn't really want it."

"Oh my God! You're such a – I was grieving Bret! I…I had no idea…"

"Keep telling yourself that Shawn but you enjoyed every second of it and so did I. Now can we please talk like civilized adults? I'm not in the mood to argue."

"You should have thought about that before you followed me from the studio. I don't want to talk with you let alone see your face!" Shawn stormed back towards the bed and started snatching up his clothes. "I'm leaving. I'm not finishing the interview because you've officially ruined my life."

"What?!? I ruined your life!" Bret jumped up hurrying across the room after him. "Shawn I'm not the one who left you sweetie."

"Don't call me sweetie! I am not your sweetie and for the record you did in fact leave me!"

"But that was 12 years ago Shawn and it's not like you made it easy for me stay. Shawn…baby look at me."

"No—

Bret grabbed his arm snatching him around. "Stop it! Just…stop with the tantrum Shawn."

"Let me go!"

"No! Now you listen to me." Bret closed the gap between then Shawn could feel Bret's body heat against his naked torso. "I'm sorry you're so upset about John but don't take it out on me. He left you. And maybe I did leave you but that was a long time ago. We were both young and stupid and I'm sorry about that, but you have to stay and hear me out. You have to let me tell my side of the story."

"I've heard your side of the story too many time to care anymore! It's my story that needs to be told."

"Then stay. Stay and finish the interview."

"I'm sick of the interview!" he snapped. "I want my life to go back to normal."

"You're making this harder than what it is Shawn."

"No I'm not. You've _always _done things like this. You always take advantage of the situation. I can be mad at you but then you do this…this…you play _nice _and then we end up in bed and all is well again," he spat. "I should have listened to Kevin and Hunter when I had the chance!"

"Oh…_oh_." Bret took a step back, his eye brows raised defiantly. "I said I still loved you but I am _not_ going to let you defend those two like they were so perfect. Hunter's had it in for me from the get go."

"Yeah well he could see right through you," Shawn said dismissively.

"Oh baby I don't want to make you mad but trust me when I say, you've done your fair share of things too. In fact, you were probably worse than me doll."

"I didn't start acting like a jerk—

"Until Hunter came into the picture."

Shawn's eyes flashed dangerously. "Why are you always so quick to—

"Because it's the truth!" Bret snapped back. "Hunter's a big douche but he's so good at it that you hardly notice. I could tell you things—

"Then stop yapping and get to talking! Just tell me all of these so called 'things' Hunter used to do."

"Oh not tonight love. Not unless there's a camera rolling. I'm covering my ass this time."

"Tsk. Whatever. I would call Chris now but I'm sure he's sick of us for the day."

"So what now?"

"I'm going to put some clothes on and watch some TV until I get sleepy. First thing in the morning we're going to headquarters and we're to finish this. This is taking entirely too long and I'm supposed to be on vacation!"

"So you're just going to sleep on the couch?"

"That's right. I'm certainly not sleeping with you!"

Bret sighed. "I'm…not…I wasn't just trying to get you in bed Shawn. All those things I said this morning were a joke. I was only kidding."

"Whatever."

"What is it going to take for me to prove to you that I still love you and not just for your body?"

"I…don't know Bret and…you shouldn't even want to be with me! For Christ's sake you're married. MARRIED!"

"I can change that."

"Bret…I cant…deal with this right now." Shawn pulled the sheet tighter around him, the cold and his nerves causing him to shiver. Bret moved closer to him probably just for a hug but Shawn pushed him away. "No…don't. Just…leave me alone. If you want to make me happy then give me some space. This is too much for one day."

"Aright." He sighed. "Whatever you say. Just…I do love you Shawn. I hope you know that." Bret grabbed his clothes and went into the bathroom to shower. When the door closed behind him Shawn let out a breath. This whole situation was completely screwed up but what's worse was that Shawn was starting to wonder about his future. With John being gone, he had no where to run. He was being forced to deal with this on his own. A few months ago Shawn was ready to handle anything. He was ready to bury feelings for the sake of others if it meant a better life for other persons involved but this time things weren't so simple.

The one guy that Shawn thought was finally free from his heart was once again finding away to insert himself in again and Shawn hated it. His life was perfect. For three months his life was worry free but damn Bret for actually showing up for the stupid interview. Shawn walked around the room picking up pieces of clothing. When he grabbed his jeans, something fell out of them with a soft thud. Shawn bent over to pick it up but just staring at the box made his heart sink and stomach churn. He'd forgotten all about it until now… He choked, finally willing himself to pick it up and without opening it, he stuck it back into his pocket as he shed tears. What now? Just what did the future have in store for him now? Right now, Shawn hadn't the slightest clue and little did he know, his friends didn't either. How quickly things can change in just a blink of an eye.

* * *

**FYI: Some things you should take into consideration:**

_- Some of you like the way the main characters are portrayed, some of you don't. For those who don't I want you to know that I am basing their characters on the way their DVD bios said they were. Shawn was always very timid outside of the ring. He didn't get 'confident' until he got a lot of friends. Bret was always confident among other things. I try not to make Shawn come off as a 'girl' but when you're writing slash, you can only do so much. Bret even said in a shoot that Shawn had a certain 'lack of masculinity'. Take that for what it's worth.  
_

_- I am not making Shawn out to be a God. Believe me, he will become the Heartbreak Kid everyone hated...when I get there._

_- Hunter said in an interview that he basically walked up to Shawn and introduced himself. From then on they were buddies. I kind of tweaked it a bit but for the most part it may have went something like that._

_- Bret said on his DVD that him and his family basically ran the locker room. So take that for what it's worth._

_- I'm actually really tired of writing this fic. I don't plan on 'quitting' but if I ever get really fed up with it, I'll stop updating until I'm motivated to finish it._

_- Don't expect an Oscar winning ending...if it ends at all._

_- I'm going to put a list of songs/links on this profile that go with this fic. It's actually music that helps me write the fic. Certain songs fit certain chapters and if you'd like to know what songs motivated each turn of events (besides the obvious real life stuff), just look under 'soundtracks' on this profile. If I could make a soundtrack for this fic, it would be one hell of an album._

_- **DKaneanite and wrestlefan4** get a big thanks this time around b/c if it wasn't for their randomness on Twitter, I wouldn't have typed this chapter to begin with. Thank you two so much. You are loved about as much as Shawn, Chris, Matt and John. (Take your pick. I like several Johns.) :P_

_- Cooking Killer gets an uber hug because her ShawnCena fic made me all gooey inside...and it helped with this chapter. Thanks for that. Which reminds me...._

**CHALLENGES!**

- I want more Cenico fics. Cenico = John Cena & Chris Jericho. I usually have these two involved somehow with a certain blonde but when I was typing a chapter for _"Everybody Wants Shawn"_, I realized that this works too. :P

- I want more ShawnCena (obviously) These two motivate me to type.

- I want more Mizzico. Mizzico = Jericho & The Miz

- I want a damn Sting/Styles fic! -__-

- More people should write Bret/Shawn. Why? So that I don't have to do it.

- I'd like LESS badly written Chris/Stephanie fics. In fact, let's do away with that one. Period.

- Is it wrong to want a Punk/Taker fic? But it has to be all Taker in control/creepy-undead kind of thing.

Take your pick. And....I think that's all. Going to watch/read some 'Naruto' now. I have anime stuff to update. Ta Ta**_ ~Shawn's_Angel_**


	22. Boundaries

Chris never expected to really enjoy his time at the aquarium. Truth be told, he only went to get his mind off of the interview. But after walking around for a little over 2 hours, Chris had to admit to himself that the kid was right. The aquarium was a really nice place to hang out. It wasn't overly crowed with noisy children or their parasitic parents. Instead, the few kids that were there with family were too busy gawking at the beautiful angel fish or watching happily as the dolphins swam around eagerly showing off.

The lights were low and the soothing sounds of Santana played over the loudspeaker setting the mood. As Chris and Mike rounded the corner to where the sea urchins lie, Chris couldn't help but note the several couples standing near the glass holding hands or embracing each other as their beloveds whispered things in their ear. Chris sighed.

"Is something wrong?" Mike asked. They were standing shoulder to shoulder watching the sea urchins dance, but unlike Chris, Mike had been thinking only of his friend. Then there was the fact that they were in the midst of another uncomfortable silence; one that Mike was determined to break. Mike reached over and grabbed Chris' hand giving it a gentle squeeze. "Chris?"

Chris turned to Mike moments later with a smile on his face. "I'm sorry Mike. Everything's just fine. I was just…thinking." He caressed the back of Mike's hand bringing color to the younger man's face.

"Ah…that's good then but don't think too much."

"Maybe I won't." Both turned their heads and went back to watching the urchins; both men losing themselves to sounds of Santana and thoughts of the other.

**~*--*~**

When Jeff was done for the night, he hurried to get a quick shower then waited outside the arena for John. Ten minutes later the two of them were sitting inside a small coffee shop having drinks near the back. Both men were pretty tired after the night's events but knew they needed to talk about some things before heading back to their lovers. Jeff sighed drawing attention to himself for the first time all evening.

"Are you alright?" John asked. They were both sitting quietly, neither one knowing quite where to begin.

"I'm fine I guess. Just missing Hunter and worried about Shawn. That guy can never catch a break."

"Yeah. I agree but don't you think he sometimes bring it on himself?"

Jeff looked across the table at John as he thought about his words. He was right in a way. Shawn didn't necessarily have to do the interview but then he was sure Layfield had something to do with it. Probably wanting to test Shawn's love for him which in Jeff's mind, was either the dumbest thing he could ever do or the smartest. Right now though he was leaning towards the plain out stupid side. "I don't know John. I guess it would depend on how you look at it in this particular situation. Yes Shawn was partly to blame for taking John's deal a few months ago but as far as this interview is concerned, I think a lot of the blame goes to his lover…or former lover being as we're not quite sure where things stand."

"Yeah I know but did Shawn really need to prove himself?"

"Well…I don't really know. Shawn told me some things about JBL that just doesn't seem right. Like he told me John had huge self esteem problems. If that's the case then I really can see why Shawn agreed to the interview."

"He'd want to prove to John that his love is real."

"Right but I don't think Shawn ever calculated Bret would still be in love with him."

"That's what Mark said but then, Mark also said both Shawn and Bret were blind lovers."

Jeff frowned. "What the hell did Mark mean by that?"

John laughed. "Half the time I have no idea what Mark means. He's so cryptic with his advice."

"Aww well fuck. That doesn't help us," Jeff mumbled.

"But…" John sang. "He _DID_ tell me some stories."

Jeff quirked his brow curiously. "Stories?" John nodded. "What _kind_ of stories?"

"Oh…stuff that he observed about Shawn and Bret years ago prior to them being good friends. Mark and Shawn were always associates being that they worked together but they didn't become actual friends until one night when Mark over heard them fighting in the locker room. In fact, Mark knows a lot of things – including why Bret probably hates Hunter – but it's not my place to reveal all of that."

"Tch. Then why'd you bring it up?" Jeff snapped irritably.

John threw up his hands in his defense. "Whoa. Dude. Chill out. I'm sure you'll get the stories eventually. Besides, there's always two sides to every story so why don't you ask Hunter about it?"

"I would but Shawn doesn't want Hunter to know."

"Know what?"

Jeff bit his lip. Shawn told him not to say a word about Bret, but he was already too deep to just ignore John. He sighed. "Shawn and Bret are currently stuck together in a hotel room."

"Oh…well…"

"They had sex," he added quietly.

John's jaw dropped. "_Seriously_?" he hissed. "But…but how? I mean…_why_? How'd…?"

"I don't know what happened but Shawn's upset and I get the feeling he didn't mean to do it."

"Well, you and I both know that things like that don't matter. Whether it was intentional or not, it still means he slept with his ex lover. John…will freak."

"Yeah well John's not here is he?" Jeff said bitterly.

John frowned. "You don't sound…wait a second. Are you Team Bret all of a sudden? I know I had doubts about Jibble earlier but not to this extent."

Jeff shrugged. "Maybe."

"Oh come off it Hardy," he scoffed. "You're just as bitter about John leaving as Hunter so cut the act."

"It's not an act John," he answered quietly. "I've had all night to think about this and I've decided that maybe all of this is happening for a reason."

"Wha…?"

"Maybe…maybe Shawn's better off without John."

He spoke he words but even he had a hard time believing what was coming out. There was a long pause before John spoke up again. "Jeff…I really want to dive across this table and tear you a new one."

"For what? Speaking the truth?"

"It's not the truth if you don't even believe your own words. You still have doubts about Bret and yet you're trying to convince yourself and me that this is okay?"

"I don't think he's a bad person for trying to get back the man he loves. At least he's trying. John just gave up."

"We don't know that Jeff and besides, I bet you won't go telling Shawn all of this. He'll hate you for it and you know it!"

"Which is why I'm telling you," he shot back. "I care about Shawn and I really, _really_ want to help him but if he's sleeping with Bret and hyperventilating all over him then maybe John's right. Maybe Shawn and Bret belong together."

"You know…just forget it. I'm not against Bret but as you know, Shawn's my idol. I grew up wanting to be just like him and like any Shawn fan, we all know about Montreal. We "know" what happened that day. We've seen the interviews and Bret has publicly stated for years that Shawn's a little shit head. He's called him gay, a hypocrite, and a scrawny little crybaby. Now the fact that Bret has had a sudden change of heart may not bother you but it sure as hell bothers me."

"True love never dies John. People say things to hide their true feelings all the time."

"Whatever Jeff. We're getting nowhere with this so we should probably get going. I can't tell you much about what Mark told me because he's my lover and I made him a promise. But you…If I were you I'd start worrying about my own lover. Hunter's a big part of this too you know."

"I have nothing to worry about. Hunter and I are good and have been good since he's come to terms about JBL."

"So you mean to tell me he's not the least bit disturbed about Bret?"

"A little but what's your point?" he asked irritably.

John shook his head. "You have lost your damn mind if you think Hunter's just fine."

"What are you saying John?" Jeff asked angrily. "Are you saying I could lose my lover?"

"I'm saying that Hunter and Bret were once rivals for the man you once hated. If Bret is still in love with Shawn what makes you think Hunter isn't?"

"He's not! Hunter's in love with me!"

"But he still loves Shawn."

"I know that! God! Why are you bringing this up?!"

"I'm bringing this up because if Hunter ends up in the middle of this, what do you think's bound to happen?" he asked quietly. Jeff bit his lip and remained quiet. He knew what John was getting at but he didn't want to hear it. He didn't want to think about Hunter's possessiveness and had somehow - through all of this mess – managed to ignore the fact that Hunter had a tendency to interfere whenever it involved the Kliq's baby girl. Jeff shook his head. He was so angry and frustrated that he barely registered the tears streaming down his face. _It won't happen…It can't… He's wrong…_ "Jeff? Jeff come on. Let's get out of here." Jeff wiped his eyes brushing the uneasy thoughts from his mind. He was going back to the hotel to get some sleep and first thing the next morning he was planning to head back to his Hunter.

***---***

"Adam…baby…L.A? You're going to LA? But you have a show to do in like 2 days!" Adam continued throwing things in his suitcase ignoring his lover. Randy cast Dave a pleading look but Dave just shook his head.

"I'm not in it," Dave laughed. "Adam, for what it's worth I think you're overreacting. I actually agree with Randy but I'm not going to get in your way."

"Gee thank Dave," Randy mumbled. He turned back to Adam who was now concentrating on trying to zip his suitcase up. "Dammit Adam! What am I supposed to do while you're gone halfway across the country? Don't you know Vince will be furious if you're not at the show?"

"Yeah I know but this is serious Randall. I need to find John. I need to—

"You need to mind your own business," Dave added.

"Look guys, John's my friend. I've been calling him all day but he's not answering the phone. I'm not…trying to make him go back to Shawn. I just need to make sure that he's alright. Where's the harm in that?"

"You expect me to believe all you want to do is check on him? This morning you were storming around talking about seeing Chris about that interview. You expect me to believe you've forgotten all about it? That you're just going to let it go?" Randy asked.

"I never said I was letting it go Randy. I just…I saw Mark this morning but the pale faced zombie wouldn't tell me a thing."

"And with good reason," Dave scolded. "You know how bad things get when people interfere in other people's business. For the last time Adam, stay out of it."

"Sorry guys but I can't."

"Fine. Then I'm coming with you," Randy growled.

"Whatever dear. Guess we're both getting in trouble if we're not back. And just so you know, I have no idea whether or not John's in L.A."

"Then why the hell are we going?"

"It's more or less a hunch."

"Wait guys…Adam…listen. Why don't you and Randy go to L.A. after the show? If you miss this week's show Vince is liable to blow a gasket. You know we're building up to a PPV. Go to this week's show and that will give you four days to get to L.A. and back."

Adam thought long and hard about this before nodding. "Alright. We wait but then after the show we're off. I have to find John…for his sake."

***~**~***

Hunter turned his music up loud hoping it would drown his thoughts of the past but unfortunately fate had other plans. Every song was just as bad as the first one.

_How the hell did we wind up like this? Why weren't _

_we able to see the signs that we missed? Let's rewrite _

_an ending that fits…_

"Ugh!"

_I hate living without you. Dead wrong to ever_

_doubt you, but my demons lay in waiting_

_tempting me away… Oh how I adore you!_

_Oh, how I thirst for you…need you…_

"Dammit! Why can't they play something happier?" Hunter pulled the car over on the side of the road and switched off. So far today was not his day and it didn't help that thoughts of the past were haunting him. He blamed Bret for this because if it wasn't for that raven haired lunatic he wouldn't be remembering the first time he met Shawn. Hunter leaned back in his seat staring out the window. The evening was nearing, the skies sporting a beautiful purple and orange. It was beautiful…

**~*-~-*~**

"Hunter I believe you haven't met these guys. This is Razor aka Scott and our other baby Sean but call him Pac around here." Hunter shook both guys hands as they headed out of the arena. The guys were on their way to the bar after a great night of wrestling. Shawn was in a particularly bad mood and Kevin suggested that they all go out.

Minutes later they were inside the bar sitting at the counters. Pac was on the far end next to Scott. Scott was next to Kevin then Shawn and Hunter. Kevin wanted it that way to keep Shawn out of trouble. Of course Hunter didn't mind at all considering he found Shawn to be extremely attractive.

"Alright guys. We need to laugh…have some fun chicos!" Razor grinned. He and Pac were downing their third shot attempting to lighten the mood.

"Hey! All of us can't get wasted you dicks," Kevin warned. "I'm not going to be responsible for all of you plus girly here," he teased nudging Shawn in the side. Shawn barely acknowledged anyone as he downed his fourth shot of rum. Kevin sighed. "Baby girl cheer up. Don't let that—

"Don't," Shawn warned. "Don't say it."

Kevin threw up his hands in defeat. "Fine. I'm going to dance." Hunter watched as Kevin pulled Scott and Sean to the dance floor leaving him alone with the blonde. Shawn was sulking now, staring at his empty shot glass with his lips poked out. Hunter filled Shawn's glass up again and chuckling softly.

"I really don't know why someone so beautiful would need to drink like this but the look on your face tells me you could use another one."

Shawn shook his head before downing his fifth shot. "Beautiful," he scoffed. "I hate being beautiful."

"Why do you hate it? I would like to think it was a compliment." Hunter replied softly taking note of Shawn's sadness despite the forced bitterness in his voice.

"I just do," he mumbled.

Hunter heard a few giggles coming from behind that got his attention. He looked around for Kevin and noticed that he and Scott were all over each other while Sean was surrounded by ladies. It took him a minute to realize that the giggles were coming from a nearby table with three beautiful ladies looking their way. He smirked earning more giggles from them. Hunter pointed at himself winking and the ladies nodded. He shook his head. _If only I was remotely interested in women right now…_

One of the ladies pointed towards Shawn and while Hunter knew it was pointless, he wanted to see if the ladies could cheer him up. He nudged Shawn in the side. "Hey beautiful. Looks like I'm not the only one taking notice." Shawn was well beyond drunk at this point but Hunter hardly noticed since he seemed to be holding his own very well. Shawn spun around in his chair and flashed the women a smile. All of them squealed drawing attention to their table. Hunter laughed. "Wow. Shawn…you certainly know how to liven a bunch."

"I guess I do," he grinned. He motioned for the ladies to come over and they all but ran to get to him. "Hey…wait a second ladies…Whoa! There's _plenty _of me to go around." Shawn was practically drug off his chair then sandwiched between two of the women. "What's your name baby?" asked one of the girls. All three were tall, sexy blondes wearing the tiniest skirts any straight man could hope for. Shawn only grinned, his drunkenness finally showing.

"My name's Shawn – the only name you'll ever need to know."

"I'm Dixie. These are my friends Kate and Teri."

"Hello ladies. So what can I do for you beautiful young ladies this evening?"

"Nothing," Dixie whispered, her lips grazing his neck. "We'll do it all for you." She ran her hands up and down his bare chest while the other two ladies caressed his thighs and his butt. Hunter only watched amused at the sight while Shawn let the ladies work his body. "God Shawn you're so fucking hot!"

"I know baby. I know."

"Come with us," she pleaded. "Leave here with us and we'll give you the time of your life."

"Only if I can fuck you til you scream Shawn in your sleep," he teased. Shawn pulled Dixie tighter against him letting her feel his cock against her. She moaned. "You like that don't you?"

"Fuck…yes. Shawn take me—

"HE AIN'T TAKING YOU NOWHERE!" Hunter jumped only just realizing that two huge men dressed in army uniforms were standing near him glaring angrily at Shawn. Shawn of course was drunk off his rocker and didn't seem to care that two big men were ready to kill him.

"Uh…honey…Wha…what are you doing here?" Dixie asked nervously.

"I could ask you the same thing. Get the fuck out of here now. I'll deal with you when I get home and you…" The ladies scrambled away allowing the two men to close in on a drunk Shawn. _I can't let them hurt him…_

"Hey…guys. I think this might be just one big old misunderstanding," Hunter said calmly.

"You stay out of it," he growled.

"Um…do I know you two?" Shawn asked.

"You're about to know us," they growled. "You were with our wives just now."

Shawn blinked a few times before he burst out laughing. "Oh you mean the blonde ladies…they're married?"

"YOU DAMN RIGHT THEY'RE MARRIED!"

"Oh I'm sorry," Shawn giggled. "I just wanted a quick fuck and since they were flirting with me—

"You lie!"

"He's not lying," Hunter growled. "Now get away from him."

"Or what?" one of them asked now towering over Hunter.

Shawn giggled again. "I can't help it cause my dick stays hard longer than yours limp dick." That did it. Glass was broken, fists were flying and somehow Shawn managed to get away without so much as a scratch. Apparently Kevin and the others were expecting something like this to happen and were already in position to grab Shawn if need be. Meanwhile Hunter ended up getting punched in the face before Kevin was able to help pull him out of the bar before the owner could figure out who started all the commotion.

"Shawn…baby we've got to stop doing this. One of these days we're not going to be around to help you. You gotta learn to exercise some kind of restraint."

"Fuck you!" he slurred. "I'll do what I want. Now put me down!" Kevin was carrying him over his shoulder ignoring all the foul words coming out of his mouth. Meanwhile Sean and Scott were tagging along near him shaking their heads while Hunter lingered behind a bit rubbing the sore part of his face.

"Hunter!"

"Oh…sorry Kev. I'm coming," he answered, jogging quickly to catch up with them.

"Sorry about this," he winced. "I should have told you how he gets but I didn't think tonight would be so bad."

"Oh it's okay. I enjoyed my time with him," he grinned.

"Yeah well let's hope big bad Bret doesn't find out about this."

"I'm not going to say anything if that's what you're implying."

Kev shook his head. "Nope. Not you but the brother. He was in the bar tonight along with Davey. They bar hop about as much as we do these days."

"Oh…I didn't see them."

"They were there and if I know them, Bret will know within the next hour or so. I would keep Shawn with me tonight but that would mean kicking my lover out."

"What about Sean?"

"Oh please," he scoffed. "He's no better than Shawn sometimes. Plus he smokes; a habit I'd rather not see my baby girl pick up."

"Oh well I'm not rooming with anybody. He can room with me tonight."

"Not that I don't trust you, but I can tell Bret doesn't like you. He _will_ come looking for Shawn later and I don't want to be the cause of anymore trouble."

"I won't say a word to Bret. I don't want to make any enemies right now so just trust me. I'll take good care of him," he reassured.

Kevin thought about this for a long time until he decided that he didn't have much of a choice. "Well…I guess he can room with you. I know I can't leave him alone." Hunter drove them all back to the hotel since Shawn was being held by Kevin. By the time Hunter parked the vehicle, Shawn was already asleep. Sean said goodbye to all of them as he was meeting someone in the lobby while Scott headed up to his room. Kevin followed Hunter to his room, which was located two floors higher than Kevin and Scott's. When Kevin entered the room he was still a bit hesitant about leaving Shawn.

"Kevin I know he's your baby girl but what's one night going to hurt?" he hissed. Hunter drew back the covers then helped get Shawn out of his boots before Kevin tucked him in.

"Alright Hunter. You're responsible for him tonight. Don't make me have to kill you tomorrow."

"I won't now get going before your lover has a fit."

Kevin bid him a goodnight and when he finally left, Hunter let out a relieved sigh. He was so fucking tired. His back hurt from his wrestling match and if that wasn't enough, his jaw was swollen from that punch he received on behalf of Shawn. Hunter dimmed the lights then hobbled across the room, tearing off pieces of clothing. Since Shawn was knocked out he didn't suppose much harm could come from sleeping next to him.

Hunter stood over Shawn watching the sleeping beauty in his slumber. He really was very beautiful and it thrilled Hunter just being near him. He knew it was probably just a stupid crush but he didn't care. All he could think about was how perfect his smile was…well…when Shawn actually decided to smile. Tonight was an entirely different story and judging by the sound of Kevin's voice, Bret was the cause of all the blonde's problems. Hunter frowned. He didn't know much about Bret but even after just that one meeting Hunter was sure he didn't care for Bret. There was just something so smug about him that rubbed him the wrong way. That and the fact that Bret had Shawn. _What are you doing Hunter? You don't know Bret so don't judge him._ _Besides you're just jealous because Bret saw him first…_ Even so, it was still hard not to place judgment when something so beautiful was hurting.

Just as Hunter was about to finally crawl in bed, he heard a soft knock at the door. Hunter groaned. _Who the hell could this be at this hour?_ Hunter hurried to open the door and when he did, it took all of his will to hide his annoyance at the man standing before him.

"Hunter?" Bret frowned.

"Not meaning to sound rude or anything Bret but why are you bothering me at this hour?"

"I was told that this was the room Shawn's staying in tonight. I wanted to talk with him for a moment."

"Oh I see. Well uh…your source was right. Shawn's here but he's asleep." All of a sudden Hunter was feeling really angry at the handsome man before him. He couldn't really explain his anger. He just felt like Bret was suddenly undeserving of seeing his lover and like Kevin, he wanted to make sure Bret was sent home extremely disappointed.

"Well…Shawn and I are _really _close. I know it may not seem that way but it's true. That being said, I'd really like to speak with him."

Hunter folded his arms across his chest, smirking at the older man. "Uh well…I suppose I could wake him but mind you he's in a really bad mood. Got drunk out of his mind earlier and to be perfectly honest with you I don't think he wants to see you." _What are you doing Hunter? Why are you being so possessive?_

"Is that so?"

"Yeah but I tell you what. How about I tell him you came by when he wakes up? If you're not leaving early then I'm sure he'll go looking for you. That is, if you two are really good friends."

"We're friends. _Best_ friends as a matter of fact, but you wouldn't know that since…you know…you're just a rookie around these parts."

Hunter forced a smile. "I suppose not but then after observing you two today, I'd hardly call what you two have a "close friendship" if you can't even be nice to one another in public." Hunter could have sworn he saw Bret's eyes flash dangerously but just as quickly they returned to normal. Bret shook his head.

"Look, all I want to do is look in on him and then I'm gone. I know you know about Shawn and me, but unlike most of the locker room I could care less if _you_ know about us. Not like anyone would believe a newbie like you anyway," he shrugged. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to kiss _my lover_ goodnight."

Bret pushed his way past Hunter into the semi dark room. Only the light from the hall seeped into the room, a streak of light brushing the side of Shawn's face. Hunter watched as Bret took a seat on the edge of the bed brushing the hair out of Shawn's face. Then he leaned closer placing a gentle kiss on his lips. Hunter quickly turned away, his eyes refusing to watch such a sight.

Moments later Bret brushed past him on his way out the room. "Don't make me regret leaving him here," he said softly. "You touch him and I'll see to it that the farthest you advance in your career is Resident Mid-card Jobber."

**~-*~-*-~**

_Bow down to the king! _

Hunter jumped at the sound of his phone ringing. He hadn't realized it but he'd been daydreaming in the car for almost twenty minutes. He pulled out his phone and saw that it was Jeff calling him. For some reason he couldn't bring himself to answer it. _Not right now Jeff. I need to think…_ Hunter ignored the call as he started the engine again driving off into the sunset.

**~*-xx-*~**

Chris and Mike laughed all the way to their room. Chris was teasing Mike because some kid recognized him and called him an idiot. "I have the key Chris. You keep laughing and you'll be sleeping in the hall way."

"Okay…okay I'm…" Chris managed to clamp his mouth shut long enough for Mike to push open their door. Once inside the dark room, Chris burst out laughing again.

"Chris!"

"I'm…sorry but…you should have seen your face," he breathed. "You…that kid…"

"Well he called you a pompous assclown!" Mike huffed, locking the door behind them. "And he _didn't_ call you ugly," he mumbled.

"Aww…come on Mizzy. Cheer up." Mike stormed past Chris towards the bed but Chris grabbed his arm, spinning him around. "Mizzy. I know you're not seriously letting that kid get to you right?" Mike folded his arms across his chest pouting. Chris smirked. "You're such a baby. That kid's a fucking prick who wouldn't know talent if it lived with him everyday."

"I don't care about that stupid kid," he mumbled.

"Then what is it? Are you mad because he called you ugly?" Mike remained eerily quiet staring down at the floor. "Oh my…that's it isn't it? You're mad because he called you ugly."

"I'm not mad. I'm just…"

"Just what?"

"Nothing. Just forget it." Mike tried to back away but Chris held his wrists keeping him in place.

"Why are you running?"

"I'm not running now let me go! I'm going to bed." Mike tried to free his wrists again but Chris only held them tighter closing the gap between them. "Chris—

"You can't go to bed just yet you hypocrite. We're on a date and the way I see it, the date's not over yet."

"It is for me," he grumbled.

"Did you have a good time?"

"I did until that kid—

"Forget that gelatinous ass-wipe." At this Mike laughed out loud. "Finally a laugh. Now answer my question. Did you have a good time?"

"I think I should be asking you the questions since it was _I_ who took _you_ on a date."

"Alright. Fair enough," he grinned. "I had a great time today. How about you?"

"I…guess I had a great time too," he grinned.

"Ahh well good. So uh…care to finish the date?"

"What did you have in mind?" Mike asked. Chris only smirked before taking Mike into his arms kissing his lips.

* * *

**AN: I'm too tired and too lazy to write out lemons so you'll have to deal with it for now.**

_- We're moving along nicely I think though this is still taking entirely too fucking long._

_- I'm not skipping Bret but everyone has a story to tell. We'll eventually get back to Bret and Shawn but I believe Hunter, Vince, and Mark are more important right now._

_- John (as in JBL) will be making another appearance soon. I mean let's face it. Bret hasn't won anything yet and probably won't at the rate he's going._

_- Shawn's a jerk but then so is Bret. We're finally getting a little taste of the Heartbreak Kid._

_- The bar scene really did happen just not to that extreme. Hunter said on Shawn's DVD that occasionally they would go out and all the women would flirt with Shawn. Shawn would always flirt back ("being Shawn" as he put it) and sometimes it led to fights being that most of the time the women had boyfriends. Not entirely Shawn's fault but oh well..._

_- The two songs used in this chapter are by Nickelback and Skillet. "Someday" and "Comatose"._

_- I really want to read some interesting scenarios based on this year's Survivor Series. I mean, come ON guys. We have that juicy SD triple threat match between Jerishow and Mark while Raw certainly has ENDLESS fanfic possibilities. Shawn, Cena and Hunter? Get with it people. I know you all think like I do ;)_

_- I probably wont update for another month. Why? Because I still hate this fic despite all the reviews. I hate having to defend Bret. I hate having to defend Shawn. And I've decided that I don't care anymore. _

_- I might sound a bit bitchy but work is pissing me off. I'm sick of the stupid bullshit at work and I really wanna punch a few corporate people in the face! I'm not being a bitch to you guys. I'm just being honest and ranting since I can't do it at work. Plus, I really am tired of Montreal right now._

**FYI:**

- **_"Speed Dating to Love" by me_**

- **_"Secret Sexer" by wrestlefan4_**

- **_"Memories" by Dark Kaneanite_**

Read them. Good stuff that will hold you over before I have enough patience to bother with this fic again. Review if you want. Going to bed now.


	23. Insecurities

Hunter woke up first the next morning. His jaw was still sore but at least his head wasn't hurting anymore. He attempted to roll over and off the bed but something was keeping him in place. He blinked a few times to make sure he wasn't seeing things but it was as real as his swollen jaw. Shawn was lying on top of him, having rolled over at some point during the night. His head was resting on his chest, his long silky hair blanketing Hunter's body. Hunter gasped then clamped his mouth shut just as quickly to hide his nervousness. Shawn. Beautiful, sexy, breathtaking Shawn was lying on top of him. It took everything Hunter had not to reach up to run his fingers through hair he was sure would feel just as good sliding between his fingers as it did blanketing his sides. Hunter refrained from touching the blonde as he was suddenly reminded of Bret's warning from last night. While he wasn't afraid of big bad Hitman, he certainly didn't wish to be a mid-card star for the rest of his life and unfortunately for him, he was sure Bret could make it happen. Bret had too many years on Hunter which meant he had quite the pull.

"Mn…Bret…" Hunter froze. Shawn was stirring in his sleep and didn't surprise him that he was calling out to his lover. Shawn's eyes fluttered open and he raised his head meeting Hunter's terrified gaze. "Mn…Hunter?"

"Uh…morning beautiful," he said nervously. "Shawn this isn't what it looks like. I uh…"

"Where's Bret? I…ahhh my head fucking hurts," he groaned.

"I…well we went out last night with Kevin and the others. You kind of got drunk but Kevin brought you here."

"Oh." He was quiet for a moment and then he spoke again. "Did…Bret come looking for me last night?"

Hunter's face almost twisted into a frown but he somehow managed to hide his disgust. Not with Shawn but at Bret. He wished he could lie to Shawn. He wished he could tell him that Bret didn't give a damn about him but after witnessing that kiss last night, he knew Bret loved Shawn. He just had a shitty way of showing him. Hunter forced a smile hoping it came off as genuine looking. "Well Shawn, as a matter of fact he did come by. You were sound asleep and we both decided to just let you sleep after all that ruckus at the bar."

"Bar?" He bit his lip nervously. "I…what happened last night?"

Hunter watched him for a minute taking note of how scared he looked all of a sudden. "Shawn…it's okay. You didn't get into too much trouble. I mean, you're a hot guy so it's not your fault women want to take you home," he joked trying to lighten the mood. However Shawn still looked nervous. "Shawn…what's wrong?"

He suddenly looked up and frowned. "Hunter what's wrong with your face? It looks swollen."

"Oh uh…" he laughed. "It's nothing."

"Liar. What happened to your face? What happened last night?" he pressed. Hunter could tell that Shawn wasn't the easiest person to reason with so he knew he had better not press his luck too much.

"I got punched in the face by some guy in uniform about his wife, but it's no big deal."

"Where was I?"

"You…were near by but it had nothing to do with you," he added quickly. "I started shooting off at the mouth and I got what I deserved."

"That sounds like something I would do."

"Maybe we're a lot more alike than you think," he joked. Shawn still didn't look very convinced but he didn't mention it anymore. Instead, he laid his head back down on Hunter's chest, his smaller fingers caressing the bigger man's sides.

"You're about to find that I'm the world's biggest jerk and a major pain in the ass. Just ask Kevin."

"Naa…I don't think so and neither does Kevin. He loves you too much."

"You haven't known me long enough but one day you'll get fed up and abandon me. They always do. It's only a matter of time before they all leave me. They think I don't know, but I do. I can sense it." He suddenly raised his head stopping Hunter's heart with those beautiful eyes of his. "I know you took that shot for me and I'm sorry. You should have just let that guy deck me."

"Not in this lifetime. I told Kevin I'd act as an honorary bodyguard. Nothing's going to happen to you while I'm around."

"But it's not your job to look after me, especially outside the ring!" he snapped. "Don't…I don't want you to interfere anymore. Let me get what I deserve from now on!"

"You really are stubborn aren't you?"

"Don't joke! I'm being serious!"

"Okay. Alright. Fine," he said throwing his hands up in defeat. "I'll try to sit back next time while you have the shit kicked out of you by two marines."

"Marines?"

"Yeah. Two really huge guys and boy were they pissed. Their women were all over you and they just lost it."

"Wow. I didn't…"

"Don't start sweatin' it. I already told you it was nothing. Besides, Kevin and I took care of it so you're good to go Shawny." _Besides, I'm sure Bret would have my career if something happened to you…_

There was a long, tension filled silence after that. Hunter was so tense that he was afraid to even breathe let alone push the issue further. Shawn laid his head back down on his chest, his fingers drawing small circles on Hunter's sides. "You actually got along with Bret? I'm surprised he didn't try to act all macho last night."

Hunter chuckled nervously. "Yeah. We got along just fine I think."

"What do you think of him?" he asked softly. "And please…be honest."

Hunter forced himself to ignore the soft fingers caressing his skin in order to think of a good response. It sounded like Shawn wasn't used to anyone getting along with Bret despite all the good things Hunter heard about the champ. It was no secret that Kevin hated him but Hunter was pretty sure he just hated Bret's relationship with Shawn and to be honest with himself, Hunter wasn't sure if he liked their relationship either. He'd known Shawn for all of a day and a half yet already he was beginning to feel like an overprotective, jealous boyfriend.

And then there was the fact that there was something about Bret he strongly disliked. He was sure last night's meeting was more his fault than Bret's. After all, Bret was very cordial when asking about his lover yet for some reason Hunter felt the need to push his buttons. He mulled this over some more and decided that above all things, he still needed to protect Shawn and that included the blonde's feelings.

"Well…I think Bret's a pretty decent guy. He's – and you better not _ever_ tell him I said this – but I think he's pretty sexy."

Shawn finally laughed. For the first time since their first meeting Shawn was laughing and it warmed Hunter's body to the core. The blonde raised his head, his smile making Hunter blush like a teenage boy again. "Are you this sweet all the time or are you just putting on?"

"Well…I _do_ have this whole psycho killer side of me but that usually only comes out when someone needs to be taught a lesson." It was a joke but only Hunter knew how much truth was hidden in that statement. Shawn didn't seem to care and only happily kissed his chest before laying his head down again.

"I still have a headache so I'm not moving," he mumbled.

Hunter could only laugh at this. "What a baby!" he joked. _But you can lie here as long as you want baby girl…I don't mind…_

**~*---*~**_  
_

Jeff was pissed. Not only was he pissed but he was worried too. This was the third time he's tried calling Hunter while on the plane but his boyfriend just wasn't answering the phone.

JoMo was sitting across from him chatting away happily with his lover Mark. A part of Jeff wanted to snatch that phone from John and demand that Mark talk to him about Shawn, but he let it go. He really hated fighting with his friends and right now, John was probably the only person he could talk to besides Shawn. Jeff tore his eyes away from John and just stared out of the window. _Hunter…what are you doing right now?_

**~*---*~**

Hunter stood outside Shawn's hotel room staring up at the door. Well…it wasn't Shawn's room per se since Hunter and Jeff actually booked the room but he was pretty sure Shawn was still in Stamford. Jericho hadn't said anything about the interview being canceled which meant Shawn was still in the area. Hunter took a deep breath before knocking softly at the door. Moments later the door swung open and he was face to face with his favorite blonde. Hunter was more than happy to see him but Shawn on the other hand looked anything but. Shawn quickly hurried out of the room, being careful not to slam the door, and shoved Hunter in the hall. "What are you doing here?" he hissed.

Hunter was a little disheartened that Shawn was unhappy to see him but he didn't let it bother him too much since he was pretty sure Shawn was still pissed about John. "I'm sorry sweetie. I just…all of a sudden felt the need to come and check on you. Are you alright?"

Shawn folded his arms across his chest shivering slightly. He was only half dressed wearing some very tight jeans but no shirt. His hair was a little messy but Hunter deduced that Shawn was probably lying around. "I'm fine, but why are you here? You could have just called me ya know."

There was a kind of bitterness in his voice that stung Hunter to the point of sadness. He was sorry for intruding but he couldn't help it. Shawn had been on his mind all day since that incident with Bret and Hunter couldn't help but want to see him. "Look Shawn. I'm sorry for bothering you. It's just…you've been on my mind all day and I felt like I was going to go crazy unless I saw you in person. Call it…call it silly if you want but you know I worry about you. Always have. Always will."

Shawn looked up at him and frowned. "You…don't do this Hunter. Now really isn't the best time for this. I know you worry about me but I thought we already agreed to let me work things out on my own. I thought maybe after the whole incident three months ago that we finally came to an understanding."

"I-I know and we have," he said quickly, "but…you got to understand Shawn…I know things are weird for you being that you're having to relive certain events but it's weird for me too."

"How?"

"I…I can't explain it Shawn," he mumbled. Hunter ran a hand through his hair nervously doing his best to avoid that all knowing gaze of Shawn's.

"Hunter, what's…going on? Did something happen with Jeff?"

"No…not really. I mean, I haven't talked with him all day so…"

"And why not?"

"I just…haven't. I can't Shawn," he said finally. "I can't talk to him because I'm afraid."

"Afraid of what?"

"I'm…" He looked up into eyes he fell in love with well over 12 years ago. "I…Shawn I don't want to talk with Jeff because I'm afraid I won't love him anymore."

"Huh? Where the hell did that come from?"

"Well…you've been on my mind all day and I keep thinking about the day we first met. I remember looking at you and saying "Wow" because you were so fucking gorgeous. I also remember how you spent the night with me and how great it felt waking up with you on top of me, groaning about your headache."

Shawn took a few steps back shaking his head. "No…not you too."

Hunter looked away staring down at the floor sadly. "I'm sorry Shawn, but…it's the truth. I can't stop thinking about things and—

The door of Shawn's room suddenly swung open and the mood instantly changed. Hunter felt himself beginning to shake with fury at the sight of Bret in nothing but a towel. Bret merely rolled his eyes at the sight of him before turning his attention on the blonde. "Shawn, it's good to know you haven't run off. I really want you to finish the interview."

"You want him to finish the interview?" Hunter questioned. "Why? So you can keep filling his head with your false feelings of remorse and love?"

"They aren't false feelings Hunter," he growled. "They're the real deal. I love him and I suppose you don't since you're not still with him."

"Why I—

Hunter made a move towards Bret but Shawn ran in between them. "Hunter…Hunter please…please stop!"

"Why?" he snapped, finally letting the anger control him. "Why are you defending this bastard after all he's done to you and why the _fuck_ is he in a towel?! No. Scratch that. Why the fuck is he here with you?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Bret asked, his voice revealing a slight hint of amusement. Bret wrapped his arms around Shawn's waist pulling him near.

"Bret, let—

Bret smirked at Hunter before planting a kiss on Shawn's bare shoulder. Shawn snatched away from Bret but the damage had already been done. Hunter was beyond furious and Bret knew it.

"Bret why are you out here?" Shawn snapped. "You know the two of you hate each other so why stay out here to taunt Hunter? I'm not in the mood for this shit and you're only pissing me off!"

"I'm sorry Shawn but I couldn't help but overhear Hunter here as he attempted to declare his love for you."

"He wasn't—

"Oh yes he was and the funny thing about it is that he only waited until _after _John ran off and _I _confessed my love. What a selfish thing to do Hunter!"

"Bret stop it!" Shawn screamed but was completely ignored.

"Hunter this kind of reminds me of a certain incident from way back when only _you_ were the one wearing the towel." Hunter felt his heart stop and it took everything he had not to look too guilty. Bret was steady wearing that smirk of his while Shawn looked a combination of pissed and confused. "Well…guess I'll go back inside now. Hunter, I'm in no mood to fight you so you're welcome to stick around."

"No! No, no, no!" Shawn snapped. "Hunter, go home to Jeff. I can't deal with anymore shit today."

"But you haven't answered me!" Hunter snapped back. "Why the hell is Bret here with you?"

"I…I don't…know alright!" he stammered. "He's just…here and I don't want him to be but he won't leave—

"Then let me make him!"

"No! Hunter, please stop—

"Why's he in that towel?!" he demanded.

"It's none—

"It's because we made love," Bret answered lazily. He was now standing in the doorway leaning against the wall. "Does that satisfy your dying curiosity?" Hunter stared at Bret for a second trying to see if he was lying but Bret merely shrugged. Hunter's eyes fell on Shawn who was now staring in the opposite direction with tears running down his face.

"You…you had sex with him?" Hunter asked softly, trying to make himself believe it. Shawn didn't answer. Hunter got right in his face, towering over him. "Look at me." Shawn kept turning away but Hunter trapped him against the wall forcing eye contact. "Shawn…tell me you didn't sleep with him?"

"What's it to you Hunter?" Bret asked, the jealously building with each passing second. He wasn't liking the way Hunter controlled his lover and it was taking everything he had not to push him away from Shawn. Hunter of course, ignored him.

"Shawn…" Hunter raised the blonde's chin meeting eyes that were filled with hurt and confusion. "No," he whispered. "You—

Hunter backed away, his heart sinking with each step. Shawn and Bret…it was happening again. History was repeating itself and much like last time, he couldn't do a damn thing about it. Then there was the fact that he and Bret had their own little rivalry going on in which Shawn knew nothing about years ago and sure enough Bret was holding it over his head. Hunter looked over at Bret giving him the nastiest look he could muster but Bret couldn't care less. He merely smirked as he reached for Shawn's hand, pulling him back towards him.

"It's getting late Hunter and I don't know about you, but I'd rather not fight. Shawn's been through a lot today with John leaving and all so I'm sure he'd appreciate it if we would hold our fight off for another day."

"Shawn…" Hunter began but he really didn't know what to say. The blonde wouldn't meet his eyes anyway. Instead, he allowed Bret to lead him back into the room while Hunter looked on sadly. Bret came back to the door moments later, his eyes flashing dangerously. "Bret—

"I don't know what kind of stunt you're trying to pull Hunter but I'm not the one. I love him and I won't let you come between us like you did years ago."

"What?! Are you kidding me?" he hissed. "How dare you! You know full well that it wasn't all me hot shot. _YOU_ were the one treating him like he was just a piece of ass. It's not my fault that he came running to me when you didn't want to play fair."

"You hated me from day one."

"I didn't hate you Bret. I just didn't understand...but now I do."

Bret moved a little closer to Hunter standing toe to toe with him. "Stay out of this Hunter. This does not concern you."

"It _ALWAYS _concerns me when Shawn's involved."

"You two aren't together anymore so why are you getting involved?"

"Doesn't matter and anyway you're not with him either."

"Maybe not but I'm fighting for him. I'm going to do whatever it takes to prove to him that I love him."

"Yeah well love him or not it doesn't erase all the bad things you've said about him since then. I won't let you have him Bret."

"How are you going to stop me Hunter? The way I see it, you're only acting like this because it reminds you of another little incident from years ago."

"I don't—

"Oh you know perfectly well what I'm talking about Hunter…"

***~*~***

Bret was starting to wonder whether or not Shawn was worth the trouble. They were fighting all the time now but then they would make up just as quickly. Once Shawn stopped throwing his little tantrums he would do whatever Bret asked of him and now Bret was counting on it to happen again. Problem was Shawn was nowhere to be found. He was supposed to meet him back at the hotel last night but they had another big blow out about his Kliq friends which led to Shawn storming off again.

Bret sighed. A part of him really wished he could just end things with Shawn but then he loved him too much to just let him go. On the other hand, he wasn't sure if the love was as strong anymore especially on Shawn's part since he was always with Hunter. _Hunter._ Bret frowned. He hated that big nosed son of a bitch more than he hated Vince McMahon right now. Vince wanted him to drop his belt to Shawn at the next Wrestlemania but at the rate things were going, he doubted very seriously Shawn could even handle the job.

Bret got off the elevator and started towards Shawn's room. It was well after lunch time which meant Shawn had plenty of time to sleep. Therefore he had no reason to bite his head off if he was still in bed. Bret knocked loudly at the door. "Shawn? Shawn open up! We need to talk!" The door swung open seconds later and it took everything Bret had not to deck him. "Hunter. Why am I not surprised?"

Hunter merely shrugged. "What the hell do you want?" Bret studied him for a minute, taking note of his wet hair and body. A large towel was wrapped around his waist because Hunter was very much naked standing before him. The longer he stood there thinking about it, the more time he had to come up with reasons why Hunter was naked in the room with Shawn. "Are you going to answer or can I close the door in your face and get back to tending to Shawn?"

"_Tending to Shawn_?" Bret repeated softly. "Just what do you mean by that?"

"Well…" Hunter smirked. "I'm sure you can see for yourself." Bret stared at him at a momentary loss for words. Sure he could see what may have happened but he didn't want to believe it. Shawn belonged to him and just the thought of Hunter touching him…

"Where's Shawn?"

"Oh he's in the shower," Hunter teased. "I can go get him if you want."

***~*~***

"And if you remember what happened next, I punched you in the face before storming off. I was so angry at you and Shawn that I didn't talk with either of you for a week."

"Bret I didn't sleep with him!"

"Bullshit!" Bret hissed. "You basically—

"I basically told you a lie because I hated your guts!" Hunter growled. "I didn't touch him and even if I wanted to, he was too loyal to your insecure ass to even _think_ of cheating with another man. Trust me. I tried several times."

"Then why were--?

"I was in that towel because I had obviously just taken a shower."

"Then Shawn—

"Was in the shower but he went in _after_ me. I would have loved to have a round with him but like I said before, he was loyal to _you _and to this day I still can't quite grasp it. Yeah I played you for a fool but you deserved it. You treated him like shit and since I knew you were nothing more than an insecure bastard, I took advantage of the situation. I'm The Game. It's what I do."

"Then I should kill you now to make up for lost time," Bret growled.

"And Shawn will never forgive you. Like it or not Bret, he still loves me too."

"I don't…have the patience for this tonight. We keep this up and there will be bloodshed. I'm going back to my lover. Go home to your little Hardy boy Hunter and stay out of our business."

"I'll stay out of it once I'm sure Shawn's happy."

"He will be if you'll just give me a chance to prove it. I know you hate me Hunter but you can't honestly argue against my love for Shawn. I've _always_ loved him and you know it!"

"But you've done a hell of a good job showing it these past few years."

"I was angry Hunter! I'm _still _angry; mostly at you because you did some pretty low things and this only proves it."

"Yeah well you deserved it and what about John? You think Shawn's just going to forget about him?"

"I'm not trying to make him forget but it would be nice if he did. John _left _him. How is that my fault?"

"Oh it's every bit your fault but you know what? I'm not going to sweat it because if I know Shawn like I think I know him, he's not going to give into you that easily. He loves John more than you think he does."

"Well Hunter, I don't mean to sound so full of myself, but if he loves him as much as you say he does then explain why everything is falling apart for them? Explain to me why Shawn's still in love with me?"

"Because Shawn's incapable of hating anyone. At this point I'm not sure if that's a gift or a curse."

"Whatever Hunter. Go away. Go back to the cutesy little emo you left our jewel for."

"Naa…I can't. I think I'm going to stick around for a while. Besides, Shawn's still _my_ best friend and I don't think I want to venture too far just yet."

"We'll be busy all day tomorrow with the interview."

"Then maybe I'll pop in and give Chris my two cents."

"Bring it," he challenged. "I'd love to see you defend yourself in front of Shawn. Gonna be kind of hard explaining incidents like the one we just talked about."

"Whatever. I'm leaving," Hunter growled. "But don't you think for a second that this is over because it's not."

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

* * *

**AN: Bet you're wondering why you got another update so quickly. It's because Hunter Muse is dying to tell his side of the story and he wouldn't GO AWAY until I let him. There's still more from Hunter to come in the next chappy. Will it be up as quickly as three days? Maybe...maybe not, but I have to preview Survivor Series for a website, work all weekend and get off in time to actually watch Survivor Series.**

_- Hope the flashbacks were easy to distinguish between._

_- Sorry but both Bret and Hunter are typical men and will remain as such because the musi says so._

_- We'll eventually get back to the interview but I think everything will come full circle when Vince and Mark get involved-ish._

_- Shawn's friends will never learn.  
_

_- Yes, Hunter's feeling the effects of having Bret in town. You know, I wonder how things would be if Bret REALLY came back...Lots of must see TV. :D_

**FYI:**

_- I came across a Punk/Taker fic and it made my heart sing! I'm also happy that DK wrote a Jerishow fic. I'm still waiting on somebody to attempt that Raw Triple Threat. I can't do it because if you're reading "Everybody Wants Shawn" then you'll know that I'm already playing around with it._

_- I watched ECW last night and maybe it was just me, but Punk/Christian had some kind of chemistry last night. O.O_

_- Thanks to ALL who have been reading and reviewing each chapter. It means a lot to know that you all care so much about this fic despite the fact that you know I hate it. Sometimes it's the reviews that motivate me to keep trying while other times it may be twitter randomness or ShawnCena stories LOL_

_- This fic is getting to be entirely too long. 100,000 words? Thats a 300 page novel you buy at Wal-Mart -_-  
_

_- Today is my birthday. Here's my gift to you all :D Enjoy!  
_


	24. Mirror Lovers

Shawn waited until Bret came back in the room and closed the door. He walked over to him and shoved him against the door. "What the hell were you thinking taunting him like that?"

"Hey! Whoa…baby calm down."

"I won't calm down!" Shawn snapped. "I don't need Hunter getting involved right now. I have enough to think about without me having to worry about what's going to happen between him and Jeff."

"Not our fault he left you," Bret shrugged.

"Oh, much like you right?" Shawn turned away from him shaking his head. "I'm going to bed and first thing in the morning we are going to finish this shit so I can get on with my life."

"Fine, but just so you know, Hunter started with me."

"No, you had to come sticking your nose where it didn't belong."

"He wants you back and I wasn't about to just let him take you like I did twelve years ago."

"Oh are you still on that kick?" Shawn scoffed. "He didn't take me from you. By then you and I were pretty much through and you know it."

"If only because he kept feeding you lies. I didn't trust him then and I don't trust him now."

"This coming from the most insecure person I've ever met. Hunter will tell you that I never cheated on you with him. I was too loyal to _you_."

"Yeah well forgive me if I don't believe it."

"Whatever Bret. I'm on the couch. You can have the bed."

"No way! Shawn, take the bed. You know your back—

"My back is just fine," he said coolly as he rid himself of his shirt tossing it to the floor. "You have the bed because I am not sleeping with you."

"Shawn…come on now. Don't be that way. I told you I won't touch you anymore if that's your wish."

"I know you're not touching me anymore because I'm not going to be thick enough to let my guard down again. I'm so over you right now so let it go." Shawn plopped down on the couch and just curled up under his sheet. Bret watched him for a moment before admitting defeat. "Goodnight beautiful."

Shawn listened to his soft footsteps and it wasn't until all the lights were out that Shawn let out a relieved sigh. He hated this situation he was in but most of all, he hated himself. He should have never agreed to do this interview to begin with even though he really needed this closure. But more importantly he wished he wouldn't have been so weak for Bret. Bret was his past and John was supposed to be his future, but instead, Shawn was weak and in turn lost probably the best thing to ever happen to him since Hunter. Shawn clasped a hand over his mouth to keep from crying out. He missed John so much right now but what hurt him the most was the idea of John not missing him. _John…where are you and are you thinking of me…_

**~*~*~  
**

John Layfield sat in his arm chair typing away on his lap top. He was staying in his cabin up in the mountains but believe it or not, he had excellent service. It was business as usual for John, but that was only part of it. The business is what was keeping John from going insane. It had only been almost two days but already it felt like a lifetime apart from his favorite blonde. _Shawn…_ John closed his eyes, wishing Shawn's image away but this time it was much harder. This was supposed to be the day he brought Shawn to his private cabin for some much needed R&R. Today he was going to just lie around – no business at all – and just love his new boyfriend and maybe even ask for something more, but it wasn't going to happen. Instead he was here all alone hiding from the world while his boyfriend was being swept away by his one true love.

John closed his lap top setting it to the side. He should have known it would be this way but for some reason a part of him hoped – prayed even – that it would be different for him. John shook his head, a chuckle escaping him. As if something so beautiful and caring would come to big bad JBL without a price. The more John thought about it the more it started to dawn on him that maybe it wasn't meant to be. Maybe Shawn was brought to him for the short time to help him figure things out. Now that John had been with Shawn, he knew exactly how it felt to be loved and he would cherish every bit of it forever.

John closed his eyes again, remembering how afraid he once was of Shawn's love. He was terrified to death of him but Shawn never gave up.

"_Will it make you happy John?"_

Always caring about others rather than himself which just tore John to pieces thinking about it. Shawn gave up everything to take care of Bret and just thinking about it made John's blood boil. He didn't know Bret, but from what he heard about him, he knew he wouldn't have liked him years ago. Arrogant, moody with a God complex the size of Texas…it's amazing how the two even stayed together for such a time, even managing to fall in love. But John knew just from the short time he was with Shawn, that Shawn could be weak at times. Not because he was weak physically. It was mainly due to his still low self esteem. On the surface others probably saw him as a cocky heartbreaker who wasn't afraid of anything but John knew better. That's why it was so easy to bribe Shawn into taking that deal…

"_Wait a second Shawn. Just hear me out. You didn't give me time to explain the deal. You know I'm a business man and I'll make it worth your while." _

"_Alright. Talk. What exactly can you do for me?" _

_Beautiful blue eyes stared back defiantly into dark grey ones waiting to hear his response. JBL smirked at the smaller man before answering. "Well for starters, I can get that prick Chris Jericho off your back."_

"_I can do that on my own."_

"_Sure you can," he sang. "That threatening voice mail he left you the other day means he off your back right?" Shawn rolled his eyes and muttered something under his breath that sounded like 'so what' but he was ignored. "Also, you'll have a friend in me."_

"_A friend?" he asked quizzically._

"_Yeah a friend. I see you walking around here all by yourself. You're all alone now that Hunter's gone and without him, you have no one. Randy hates you. Dave wants to hurt you. Face it Shawn. You have no one and I know it's got to be tough having to fight all your battles all by yourself. Trust me. I know the feeling…or well, I used to anyway. At this rate you're going to end up with an early retirement and we both know you don't want that."_

"_Yeah but…" Shawn thought about JBL's offer for a second. While he knew it would be nice to have a partner, he knew with JBL all of his services came at a costly price, but so far JBL had yet to mention his price. "So… So suppose I decide to take you up on this offer. I'll admit that I am tired of having to fight against the entire locker room week after week all alone and yeah, Ok. I'll admit that things with Chris are bad but what's your price? You've done all this talk about what you can do for me but what am I going to have to do for you in return? What? Am I going to have to forfeit all my title opportunities to you? You know full well I don't do that kind of thing anymore." _

_JBL took a step back smiling his signature smile. "Well…not exactly. You see Shawn the thing I want in return for helping you is well…you."_

"_Come again?"_

"_You. Y-O-U."_

"_You want me?"_

"_Well yeah. You see Shawn, I've watched you all year and have decided that a businessman like myself could treat you better than these losers. So here's the deal. You let everyone think we're a couple and you'll have it made. No one will dare bother you if you're with me and all I ask is for you to play along."_

"_That's it? That's all I have to do?" he asked raising an eyebrow curiously. It sounded too good to be true and yet… _

_JBL walked over and started twirling a finger in his hair. He met Shawn's curious gaze as he leaned closer placing his lips on his for a quick, soft kiss. "Well…when I said I wanted you, that meant all of you," he murmured._

John shook his head. Loneliness. Shawn was lonely without Hunter which is why it was so easy for Cena to sweep him off his feet. The boy was head over fucking heels for Shawn and everyone knew. Cena worshipped Shawn to point where it was almost funny to watch. They were so close to hooking up but then Dave was careless in a match one night sending Cena to rehab for the next three months leaving a vulnerable Shawn all alone. Cena came back just in time but he wasn't quick enough. John managed to get to Shawn first using that loneliness against him. It was so wrong of John and he hated it. He hated it so much but then the selfish, ungodly part of him couldn't help but feel like that deal was good in a way. It brought Shawn to him which he could honestly say never would have happened in a million years without it. Cena was too much to compete with and with John's reputation and bad attitude, he had no chance in hell of landing that blonde otherwise.

John sighed. He needed to get Shawn off of his brain and focus on his work. Shawn was hundreds of miles away and probably in the arms of the man he was meant to be with. He just hoped that this was the plan from God all alone. God was someone he never listened to until Shawn came into his life. Shawn made a believer out of him once more so he said a silent prayer for Shawn's happiness then went back to work on his computer leaving all thoughts of Shawn for his work.

**~*~*~**

"I wonder what John's doing…"

"Adam for the last time, give it a fucking rest!" Randy snapped.

"Alright, alright fine but…but this is fucking amazing!" he exclaimed.

"Um…what's amazing secret agent?" Dave asked with a snicker. Dave and Randy were still sitting at the table playing Rummy while Adam was on his lap top doing something or another that kept him occupied for the last hour or so.

"Wikipedia."

Dave laughed. "Adam…and I don't know why I'm asking but just what on _earth_ could be so compelling about an encyclopedia?"

"Montreal."

Both Dave and Randy just rolled their eyes. "Adam, come on now. It's time for you to let this go," Dave scolded. "John is gone and Bret's back in town. There's nothing you can do so let it go."

"No…no you see…this is…wow," he said, his face twisted in a frown. "Vince McMahon is _so_ good."

"Alright Adam. Spill it," Dave laughed. "Tell me what the all powerful Wikipedia has to say about Montreal. Probably no more than we already know."

"Well…I just don't understand how Bret could possibly be in love with Shawn anymore after all of things he's said in the past," Adam grimaced. "I mean...this shit is so overwhelming!"

"Shawn does that to people," Dave said with a shrug. "He's the Heartbreak Kid. What did you expect?"

"I expected Bret to start shooting off at the mouth about how Shawn's version of the stories don't quite add up with his."

"Adam…"

"No. Listen to this. It says that Bret said in his book that he hit Shawn in the face backstage after it happened but Shawn says in _his_ book that it _never_ happened. Bret then calls Shawn a liar and a fake Christian in an interview two years ago but now he's 'willing to forgive' Shawn if he apologizes first. If that's the case then what the hell went down in that interview? Those two should be at each other's throats by now."

"Adam you should know by now that when it involves Shawn, nothing is ever easy nor is it quite what it seems," Randy said lazily.

"Yeah, but check _this_ out. Bret stated recently that Shawn and Mark put on one hell of a Wrestlemania match. He actually _compliments_ him but then goes on to say that he hates DX with a passion. Like, he hates DX so much that every time he sees them he wants to barf."

"But _we_ hate DX too – mainly Hunter – so what's your point?" Dave asked.

"Tch, that _IS_ the point!" he exclaimed. Both Dave and Randy cut each other confused looks. "You guys. I don't think it's Shawn that Bret really hates. I think it's Hunter."

"And how is this big news?" Dave asked. "I don't think anyone with the exception of Jeff and Shawn care for Hunter too much."

"I…don't know but I get the feeling Hunter's a big part of the reason why Shawn and Bret had so many problems. Just think about it. Bret used to direct all of his hate towards Shawn and Vince but…I don't know. Hunter's always been so possessive of Shawn. I can't help but wonder if something happened between Bret and Hunter about Shawn years ago. Remember, if you go back and watch what was unfolding onscreen prior to Montreal, Hunter was always with Shawn as if saying 'He's with me now you douche.'"

Both Dave and Randy suddenly just doubled over with laughter pissing Adam off. "So..so you guys think that this is funny?" he snapped. "You think I've lost it huh?"

"No…baby I just…" Randy could barely talk from all of his laughter.

"Alright fine. We'll see who's laughing when all of this shit finally comes to light. I don't care what you guys think. I _know_ Hunter's involved somehow because all of the stuff that's happening doesn't make any sense."

"But Shawn being in love with JBL does?" Randy asked.

"Well…I can now honestly see why Shawn would turn to John and John's not a bad guy Randall. He took care of blondie after that rape and well…Hunter was gone so…"

"Adam baby, we hear ya," Dave said waving it off. "You and your conspiracy theories, but listen. Let it go man. Leave this one to the experts." Dave stood to his feet, stretching and yawning. "I'm about to leave you two love birds alone for the evening. I'm tired and I got an early flight to catch."

Randy walked his friend to the door bidding him a safe flight. When Dave was gone Randy wasted no time getting ready for bed. "Adam aren't you coming to bed sweetie?"

"Not now baby. I wanna finish reading up on this."

Randy shook his head before crawling into bed. "I won't argue anymore because once you set your mind on something you see it all the way through. Just don't stay up too late baby. We got a show coming up." Randy cut the lights and within minutes he was sound asleep. Adam however, wasn't sleeping at all. He was reading and rereading different articles about Bret and Shawn taking it all in. Everything Bret said about Shawn up until now was horrible. Slut, man whore, crybaby – and that was just a start. He'd said a lot more than that in interviews based in Canada; some things that Adam found to be a little more than hurtful. So why was Shawn just giving in to Bret like that? It just didn't make any sense but then, when did matters of the heart ever make much sense?

Adam shook his head. He wished he could just let this go but now he was a little more than curious. He wished he could talk with his best friend John but he wasn't going to answer his phone anytime soon, at least not until he felt like he was over Shawn enough to form coherent sentences. So Adam was left all alone to play Chris Jericho. He knew it was probably a bad idea but unlike Chris and Hunter, his intentions were for unselfish reasons. Just why was Shawn having such a time with a man who supposedly hated his guts for the last 12 years? He only knew of one other person he could ask and he was going to do it the first chance he could get.

**~*~*~**

Jeff and John said their good byes then went their separate ways. Mark was waiting (despite the ungodly hour) at the airport for John while Jeff was left to catch a cab back to their hotel. Not that Hunter was supposed to come pick him up, but it still would have been nice of him to do it. Mark came for John which kind of irked Jeff a little, but he knew deep down he was being a jealous bitch. Mark and John were still a new couple and if you were to ask Mark about Morrison, he'd tell you that he was lucky to even have such a guy on his arm.

Jeff opened their room door as quietly as he could and crept inside. The lamp was still on, but Hunter was out like a rock lying across the bed. Jeff smiled. He was also very tired but right now he needed Hunter if only to reassure himself that everything was going to be okay. Jeff peeled off all of his clothes and quietly approached the bed. He crawled on top of Hunter's back, pressing his warm body against him. He nipped and sucked and Hunter's neck, feeling him up until his lover started moaning in his sleep. "Wake up baby," Jeff whispered. Hunter's eyes fluttered open, a contented sigh escaping his lips.

"When did you get in?" he asked, stifling a yawn.

"Just a minute ago." Jeff nipped at his neck. "I've missed you baby."

Hunter rolled allowing Jeff to nestle himself between his legs. "You've only been gone a day," he chuckled.

"I know but…I've still missed you."

"Oh come here you big baby." Hunter grabbed the back of Jeff's head crushing their lips together. Jeff groaned, grinding against Hunter as he dominated his mouth. Hunter quickly flipped them over looking down into his lovers eyes. A beautiful face complimented by long, gorgeous blonde hair and striking blue jewels stared back at him fiercely.

"Hunter…touch me," he pleaded.

"As you wish beautiful," he breathed. Hunter hungrily captured Jeff's lips again, his silent pleas making him instantly hard. The scent of familiar blonde hair tickled his senses driving him insane. Hunter sucked Jeff's nipples raw, loving the way his fingers curled in his hair…

"_Oh God Shawn you're so hot." Hunter's hands roamed Shawn's body frantically while the blonde moaned and arched against him, his fingers running deep through his scalp._

"_H-H-Hunter—_

_Hunter rubbed his body against Shawn, his fully hardened cock creating much friction between the two of them. Shawn wrapped his arms around Hunter's waist and he was suddenly lifted into the air, the bigger man carrying him to the bed. Hunter wasted no time lowering himself to Shawn's body, rubbing his cock hard against him as if begging Shawn to let him in. "Shawn…God Shawn let me have you…"_

_Both men were drunk out of their minds though Shawn was probably more drunk than Hunter. Hunter sucked hard at his neck, tasting delicious flesh that constantly teased him when they were alone._

"_Hunter…Hunter wait—_

_Hunter rubbed harder against Shawn hoping he could coax him into letting him continue but the blonde kept saying no which meant he had no choice but to stop. _

"_I'm sorry…but Bret…"…_

"Hunty…Hunty please...I need you inside of me," Jeff begged. Hunter grabbed Jeff's thighs and just slammed into him, Jeff's hot tight heat fitting perfectly around him. Jeff's nails dug into skin as he screamed Hunter's name in pleasure. All Hunter could think about was how wonderful it felt to finally be inside the one he fantasized about all the time.

"Oh…fuck…so good sexy…"

Jeff clasped Hunter's hips tighter, arching into him to meet every hard thrust. "Shit Hunter! Harder! Fuck me harder!"

Hunter put his full weight on Jeff, pulling out just far enough to slam back in hard and fast. Jeff was writhing from a mixture of pain and pleasure but it didn't matter. All that mattered was Hunter's love for him and right now he was so overwhelmed that he felt like crying. Each time Hunter slammed his prostate, he choked back a sob.

"That's it baby…scream for me…I love you…you're mine…all mine baby…"

"I'm…fuck I'm gonna cum soon!"

Hunter gripped his hips tighter slamming into him some more, Jeff's muscle's tightening around him. "So good…Shawn…fuck I'm coming."

Jeff gasped and both him and his lover peaked at the same time, their bodies shuddering from such an intense orgasm. Hunter took Jeff's lips for one last kiss. "I love you," he whispered. He rolled off of his lover and pulled him close, drawing circles on his arm until he finally drifted off to sleep never knowing that Jeff was wide awake crying in the darkness.

**~*~*~**

Bret was first to wake the next morning and any hope of Shawn being in a better mood quickly went out the window when he tried to kiss him. Shawn slept on the sofa curled up in his sheet. Bret woke him up with a kiss on his lips but Shawn immediately bit his head off, practically accusing him of taking advantage of him. Bret decided to leave him be and while Shawn spent an hour in the shower, Bret took the time to call up Chris letting him know they were finishing the interview today. Chris did not sound too enthused about it but that was his fault. He shouldn't have talked the two of them into it and Bret needed to finish telling his story. Shawn was so convinced that Hunter was such a good friend that it made Bret want to puke. Hunter was far from the perfect friend, but if Hunter actually showed up for the interview, he would have to be careful what he let slip. While it was true that Bret and Hunter were rivals, sometimes Bret had to wonder if they would have been such strong rivals had Shawn not been in the picture…

--

--

"Now you listen here you son-of-a-bitch," Bret oozed. "I told you to stay away from my Shawn." Bret had Hunter jacked up against a wall in the hall, but no one was around to see them. Bret wasn't going to say anything to Hunter until he saw Hunter plant a drunken kiss on Shawn's lips. Of course, Shawn wasn't expecting it but at the same time, it looked as if he almost welcomed it and Bret did not like that at all.

"Man, get off of me," Hunter huffed. "I can't help it if Shawn's attracted to me."

"You wish blondie. Seriously. Stay away from him you drunk bastard."

"Or what?" Hunter smirked. "What is big bad Bret going to do about it? You know you can't keep us apart on screen. We're working together now and Vince would surely have a fit." Bret cursed under his breath. Hunter was right. He could get his brothers to keep Shawn away from Hunter after the shows but during them was going to be a problem. "Awww don't look so pissed Hitman," Hunter smirked. "If you weren't so moody I'd consider sharing him with you. It's not like you're ugly Bret."

"Wha…?"

"Oh well I don't like the way you treat Shawn but even I have to admit that you're kinda hot. No wonder he loves you. Nice tan…nice hair…"

"Yeah well I don't like you."

Hunter laughed. "You don't have to like me Bret. I was just saying…and besides, if we were all a couple, you'd have to take a backseat because there's no way in hell I'm going to be anybody's bitch. Shawn's too pretty to top but when it comes to you and me, someone would have to give and uh…it wouldn't be me."

Bret quirked his brow before a huge grin came across his face. "You're unbelievable you arrogant prick. First off, there's no way in hell I'd _ever_ share my lover with you and secondly, I'll admit that I seem to have a thing for blondes, but you're not even close to looking as good as Shawn now stop with the games and stay the hell away from my lover."

"Or what?" Hunter teased. "You're going to beat me up? Have your brothers jump me after a show? I thought that wasn't your thing Mr. My-Family-Can-Do-No-Wrong."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." There was a long pause before Hunter spoke up again. "You know Bret. I'm gonna let you in on a little secret. I've fantasized about you and Shawn several times," he grinned. "It always ends with me fucking you senseless while Shawn watches."

Bret drew back to hit Hunter, but he was too quick having kneed Bret in the stomach sending him to the floor. Hunter scrambled to top him, but ended up getting a right across the jaw.

"You drunk bastard!" Bret breathed. "Take that back!"

Hunter grabbed Bret's arms flipping them over. Before Bret could react Hunter's tongue was forcing it's way in his mouth, the sweet taste of Jack tingling Bret's tongue. Bret didn't respond at first until he realized he was being overpowered by his number one enemy. He quickly found the strength to push Hunter off of him, scrambling to straddle his waist. Hunter grabbed the side of Bret's face pulling him down for another kiss but Bret's tongue totally dominated his mouth. Teeth clicking, both men moaned, their hands roaming unfamiliar yet electric territories they've yet to explore before.

"Bret! Bro where are you?" Bret suddenly opened his eyes, his heart racing from fear. He quickly scrambled to his feet leaving Hunter breathless in the middle of the floor. He mustered the most evil glare he could give before racing off towards his brother's voice.

--

--

_I hated him then and I hate him now. Bastard._ Bret heard the locks click and he looked up just in time to see the door swing open. Shawn was dressed and ready to go in some very tight jeans and a gray wife beater, his long hair hanging freely. "Shawn—

"I'm leaving."

"Wait…come one Shawn. It makes no sense for us to take two cars."

"Yes it does otherwise I might leave you stranded if you piss me off," he snapped.

"Princess, are you still ill at me?"

"What do you think Bret?" he asked. The door slammed shut before Bret could even think to respond. Bret shook his head. _This is going to be a long day…_

_

* * *

_**AN: WWE needs to go ahead and call me because they are so "borrowing" my creativity. I called it in "Silent Hearts" and I called it here. Bret's return after 12 years. Ha! And they've been killing me all fkn night. Shawn and Bret actually HUGGED in the ring. I marked like a MoFo. Oh hell yeah Raw was win. Raw over TNA biotches! Oh and WWE Creative, I KNOW you're reading my shit. Why don't you just hire me and call it a day?**

**FYI:**

_-Still tired of this fkn fic but now that Bret is back I guess I have inspiration to continue this fic. I'm gonna take every short cut possible tho. Ye have been warned._

_-Not as long as the previous chapter but at least you got an update._

_-FicFource rules. In case you didn't know, the Fource includes XxShawns_Guardian_AngelxX (me-duh), Seraphalexiel, wrestlefan4, and Dark Kaneanite. Read their fics. They rock the world of the wrestling section._

_-The Bret/Hunter stuff was warrented. I went back and watched old clips on YouTube, read a few interviews, ect and have decided that those two had dom issues and were probably attracted to each other but wanted Shawn more. Tsk Tsk. Shawn you sexy baby you._

_-Adam's about to complicate things even more but that's just what he does. Things are def about to pick up._

_-Interview continues in next chapter._

_-Thanks to ALL OF YOU who have been reviewing. I haven't replied to you all because this isn't my primary account and quite frankly I have been super busy. Also I know I need to read some of your fics (you know who you are) and I promise I will get to them eventually but it takes me HOURS sometimes DAYS to type one chapter of this fic so it might take me a while. But I'm not snubbing your fics. I learn a lot from you guys._

_-If you're not on Twitter, you're missing out._

**_~S.A.G_**


	25. It's Complicated

Hunter's alarm went off at 9:30 the next morning. He grabbed his cell phone shutting it off half wondering why the hell he had it set so early and then it hit him. It was because of that interview and whether Bret wanted him to or not, he was going to the interview if only to make sure Bret didn't come out looking squeaky clean. Hunter sat up in bed only to find that someone else was in the room, tossing things in a suitcase. He rubbed his eyes, getting adjusted to the light in the room and realized it was Jeff.

"When did you get here?" he asked, a loud yawn escaping him. Jeff didn't say anything to him. He just continued to walk about the room picking up hair products and things throwing them in his suitcase. "Jeff?" Hunter frowned. "What the hell is your problem? And why'd you dye your hair that annoying color?" The now red head merely glared at him as he went about still loading his suitcase. Hunter rolled his eyes. "I don't know what I did but I demand an explanation. At least tell me why the hell you came here only to leave again so soon."

"Screw you Hunter."

"Excuse me?"

"Screw you. Fuck you. To hell with you. I don't know how many other ways I can say it."

"What the fuck is your problem?" he asked again. Hunter rolled out of bed stalking towards him, his face twisted in confusion. Just what the hell did he do? "Jeffrey!"

"Leave me alone Hunter!" he snapped. "Go find your beloved Shawn and fuck with him. It's what you want to do anyway."

"Not this again," he groaned. "I don't…I'm not in the mood for one of your little tantrums, especially since I have to go deal with that stupid prick Bret in a few."

"Ahh so you're going to rescue Shawn huh? Just like you _always_ do." Jeff brushed past Hunter to pick up his shoes off the floor.

"What the _hell_ is your problem? Since when has it been a big deal about me and Shawn? I thought we got over this a few months ago after the whole fiasco with JBL? You said you were fine with us being friends. Fuck, you even spent the night with him so why the change of heart all of a sudden?"

"Never mind Hunter. Just…go. I'm getting on a plane and I'm going to visit my brother. I need some time to think about things."

"Wait…what? I thought you and Matt—

"Yeah well we might fight an awful lot Hunter but when I need him he's always there!" he snapped. "Unlike somebody I know!"

"When have I not been there for you Jeff?" Hunter asked, doing his best to control his temper. Nothing Jeff was saying made any sense.

"Never mind. Fuck Hunter, just move!" he yelled a little louder. "I have to get going before I miss my plane."

"You must be out of your damn mind if you think I'm about to just let you walk out of here without an explanation. Tell me what I did! What the fuck happened that's got you so worked up over Shawn?" he demanded. He grabbed Jeff's shoulders spinning him around. "Jeff!"

"Let me go!"

"Tell me dammit!"

"You still love him!" he choked.

"So what?!" he screamed. "You know I can't just stop loving him. I love him but not the way that you—

"YOU'RE STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM!"

"WHERE ON EARTH…?"

"YOU CALLED OUT HIS NAME LAST NIGHT HUNTER!" he choked. "You…you called me Shawn when we were making love. You said his name Hunter and no, you _cannot_ take this back. Plain as day you called me Shawn…I love you…," he sobbed. "You said I love you but it wasn't meant for me. It was meant for Shawn. I…I should have known."

Shaken, Hunter released his grip on Jeff staring at him dumbfounded. _I did that? No…there's no way…_ "Jeff…" He couldn't believe it and at the moment he started racking his brain trying desperately to remember what happened last night. He was pissed about Bret for some reason. Just knowing Bret was sleeping with Shawn again reawakened memories that Hunter had long buried in the back of his mind, some of which included moments being with Shawn. _But we never made love…not until… fuck Hunter, what did you do? I can barely remember Jeff getting in let alone fantasizing about Shawn. Ugh! It's all Bret's fault! _While Hunter was staring off into space racking his brain for answers, Jeff managed to sneak away and the next thing Hunter knew, the door was slamming shut. He jumped. "JEFF!" Jeff, _his_ Jeff, was long gone and it was all because he royally fucked up. _Dammit all!_

**~*~*~**

When Bret finally made it to headquarters, Shawn was already seated and much to his displeasure the divider was back up. Bret frowned. "Chris, what's the meaning of this?" Chris was seated in his chair sporting a glow about him that kind of caught Bret off guard. Chris seemed unusually guilt stricken during the interviews but to see him all glowy was a new one on Bret.

Chris winced. "It wasn't my idea. I just ask the questions and do what I'm told."

Bret rolled his eyes. "Shawn, I thought we were beyond this."

"I don't want to see you," he huffed.

Bret smirked. "Fine then. That just means you still love me."

"Go to hell Bret."

"I was only teasing Shawny now stop being mean and let Chris lower the divider. I want to look at you while we chat."

"No."

"Well how about this? If I can't look at you during the interview then we'll be here all day. I refuse to answer any questions unless we can talk like civilized adults."

"You are such a…fine!" he snapped. "Lower the damn divider but I swear to God Bret if you try anything—

"I know. I know. You'll leave." Bret watched with an amused look on his face as the divider lowered, revealing the body of the blonde he refamiliarized himself with just hours earlier. He was fidgeting with a bracelet on his arm, refusing to look at him. _Typical, stubborn Shawn…_ Bret took his seat next to Shawn, the distance between them not nearly as close as it had been the other morning. He scooted the chair closer to Shawn who merely rolled his eyes.

"So um…gentlemen…are we ready to proceed?"

"Yes. Let's get this over with," Shawn muttered.

"Alright. So I guess we'll start with Hunter today."

"Oh joy," Bret mumbled.

"Don't start," Shawn growled.

"Sorry sweets but I can't stand the bastard."

"That's because you were jealous of him."

"Oh yeah," Bret scoffed. "Like I'd _really_ need to be jealous of him. I was the champ and I had you. Why would I need to be jealous?"

"Keep telling yourself that Bret. You were jealous and you know it, but what I can't figure out is why. He was so beneath you and a rookie. Why did you hate him so much?"

"Oh my dear, naïve, little princess. We'll get to it eventually."

"Chris, why do we have to talk about Hunter?" Shawn asked irritably. "Hunter's not really important until Montreal so can we talk about something else? Like the build up to me winning the belt from _him_?"

"Well…I…we can talk about whatever you want," he stammered. "It's just…well after the other night I figured it was only fitting to start with Hunter considering he debuted around the time Kevin and the others were leaving. And…I thought maybe he'd be here today—

"He's a fucking coward," Bret spat. "He wouldn't dare show his face for fear of what I might reveal about him."

"And here you go again talking as if you have some big secret about Hunter," Shawn said.

"That's because I really _do_ know things about Hunter that you don't but I won't go there right now. Chris, let's get to it because next to Montreal, Hunter's the most difficult topic for me to speak on."

"Okay. Well um…who wants to go first?"

"I guess I'll start," Shawn said with a sigh. "I met Hunter through Kevin and I guess you could say we hit it off from the start. I thought he seemed nice enough and judging by the way Kevin and Scott took to him, I figured he'd fit right in with us. He did. From day one it was smooth sailing with him."

"Mn…I bet," Bret mumbled.

Shawn ignored Bret and continued. "It didn't take long for Hunter to become my other best friend. Kevin was my friend but he was more of an over protective brother. I tolerated the others but Hunter and Kevin were easily my favorites."

"So how long was it after Hunter arrived before Kevin and the others left?"

"Oh it was a while," Shawn answered. "They were with me when I finally decided I wanted to play with the big boys. I was intercontinental champion but I wanted more. Not necessarily because I wanted to be "the guy". It was mainly the journey I was after."

"Why would you want to waste so much time fighting for something you didn't really want?" Chris asked. "That sounds a little…well it defeats the purpose I think."

"I know, but I was going through so many changes. My life…this was the part of my life where I'd say it was complicated."

"Complicated?" Bret asked. "I can sum it up better. You were starting to grow feelings for that big nosed loser and it was clouding your judgment."

"This is exactly why I drove myself up here. I just _knew_ it was going to be one of those days."

"I'm sorry sweetheart, but the truth is the truth. You can't sit here and tell me that you didn't know Hunter had a thing for you. He's wanted you ever since he first laid eyes on you and you know it."

"I know this Bret," Shawn stated calmly attempting to suppress his anger. "I've always known about the crush Hunter had on me, but that's just it Bret. It was a crush. I would probably compare Hunter's crush on me to the one John Cena has on me today."

"Cena? Cena still has a thing for you?" Bret asked curiously.

Shawn laughed. "Yeah he does. It's funny because if I had not gone through all that crap a few months ago with JBL, I'd probably be with Cena now. He's a sweet kid and his silly devotion to me is flattering, but I love John."

"Ahh I see," Bret answered. "So Cena's another psychotic loser who'd do anything to get what he wants right?"

"Bret…whatever. I'm not…Cena's a good kid. You can say what you want about Hunter but I won't let you talk about someone you don't have the first clue about."

"Fair enough, but comparing Cena to Hunter doesn't help."

"Look, I was trying to say that Hunter is and was just as devoted to me back then as Cena is today. In his eyes, I could do no wrong no matter what it was. Hunter – much like Cena today – stood by me through everything…and I mean _everything_."

"Especially your bed."

"That too," Shawn answered smugly. Bret cut Shawn an evil look but he decided to let it go. Shawn was trying to piss him off but he wasn't going to give him the satisfaction. He loved Shawn and after reminiscing so much, it wasn't hard to remember how to deal with his princess.

"So Hunter's crush on you started affecting your life?" Chris continued.

"Kinda," Shawn answered. "You see, Bret and I weren't able to act like a normal couple. I was tired of people whispering behind my back and since Bret was the champ and probably the most respected person in the locker room, he didn't need people gossiping about him. By now, I was just starting to live up to the name "Heartbreak Kid". Not between the sheets, but just my attitude in general. I hated having to sneak around with Bret and what was worse is that Hunter was starting to fill in for him in so many ways."

"What do you mean?" Chris asked.

"Well…" Shawn sighed. "Hunter didn't give a damn what people said about him and of course you know to this day it's the same. Back then he didn't have the kind of power he has now but that didn't matter. Hunter was loyal to me and just…he kept me from being alone."

"Bret what do you have to say about this?" Chris asked.

"I honestly don't know what to say really," he shrugged. "Shawn and I talked about it countless times when we were together so it wasn't like he didn't know how it was going to be for us. He said he was willing to fight for us and I held him to his word. I guess it was all just words to him."

"Now wait a minute!" Shawn huffed. "Don't you dare—

"But I still love him," Bret soothed. "Looking back now, maybe it was wrong of me to expect him not to feel neglected. We went so many days without real contact Chris. Sometimes it would be weeks even before I could get my hands on him and it drove me crazy. Sometimes I would lay in bed at night, painfully aroused – almost to the point of tears – because I missed him so much." He glanced over at Shawn but the blonde looked away, not wanting to remember the longing he would have for his Bret.

"Wow. It must have been hard for you both. So Shawn, I'm guessing Hunter was like a substitute for Bret?"

Shawn shook his head. "No. No one could _ever_ replace Bret in my heart at the time. Hunter was just a distraction to me. He was a hopelessly devoted fool who kept my mind off of Bret but…" He sighed. "If it wasn't for Hunter, I'd have spent many more nights crying. I was such a frail man Chris. People will tell you that I had a huge chip on my shoulder – and I did – but it was my defense. I…I was a crybaby and I hated being alone. When Marty and Kevin abandoned me…well, at the time I thought they were abandoning me but they weren't. Anyway, when Kevin left me behind, I just sort of…I don't know. In case you didn't know, I could cope with a lot of things but loneliness wasn't one of them. I just felt so alone all the time. Hunter sort of helped kill the feeling."

"How was it for you Bret? Did you feel alone?"

Bret sighed. "For me, it's a bit more complicated. You see, I had family to keep me company so I was never alone so to speak. They were always tagging along with me so I rarely had a moment's peace. But the thing about it is, while I considered my family to be my best friends, Shawn was still the one I confided in. He was still the one who knew me better than the rest. When I was with Shawn, I was a different person; I was the real me. Shawn didn't expect nothing of me and because of this, it was a huge weight off of my shoulders. My family expected so much from me that sometimes I just wanted to be free. Shawn was my freedom." Bret reached over and grabbed his hand giving it a gentle squeeze. He half expected Shawn to jerk away but he didn't which made him feel a little bit better. He brought Shawn's hand to his lips kissing the back of it. "I love you so much."

"Bret don't…"

"I used to miss you all the time Shawn. At night I would lay in bed, often times reaching for you only to find it empty and void of your warm body. God Shawn…"

"Don't make me remember," he whispered. "I don't wanna remember."

"Shawn look at me." Bret reached over cupping his face turning him around. Shawn was crying again, his tears the only weakness of his heart. "I would open up my arms and reach for you, but you were never there. And I would cry…baby I would cry for you." He held him tenderly drawing him in for a kiss.

"No Bret…I—

"Looks like I got here just in time."

Bret and Shawn both jumped, both of them with horrified looks on their faces. Hunter was standing in the door with his arms folded across his chest. He looked anything but smug which had both Bret and Shawn concerned. Shawn stood to his feet. "Hunter…what are you…?"

"I'm here for the interview," he shrugged. He cast Bret a knowing look as he brushed past him to get to Shawn. He cupped his face drying his eyes. "He made you cry. Nothing new," he chuckled.

"Hunter I—

"I thought you would be too much of a chicken to show up," Bret smirked.

Hunter ignored him and continued to tend to Shawn. It took Shawn a minute to gain his composure again before he shoved Hunter away irritably. "Ugh! I'm fine," he snapped. "Why'd you show up? I told you last night—

"I showed up because I don't like being called a coward," he growled, nodding towards Bret. "I'm not a fucking coward and I'll be _damned_ if I'm going to sit back and let you get swept away again."

"Hunter—

"He was bad for you then and he's bad for you now," Hunter insisted. "Come on Shawn. You know what this is and you know how it used to be. While he was running around with his brothers you were with me, crying your eyes out because you felt neglected. I have never, ever left your side and I never will. _He_ on the other hand can't be trusted. You let him back into your life and it will never be the same."

"That's for damn sure," Bret growled. "Because if he comes back to me, I'll make sure you come and visit us in Calgary."

"Stop…Stop it!" Shawn snapped. "Just…stop it! I don't wanna hear anymore of this macho…whatever the hell you two got going on. I'm a grown man and I can think for myself! Hunter, go back to Jeff. Didn't he just get in last night? You should be somewhere with him helping him relax after a long trip."

"I would 'cept he's gone again," he winced.

"Gone where?"

"To uh…stay with his brother."

"And why? I thought they were on the outs."

"It's complicated."

"Oh well now this is interesting," Bret smirked. "Wonder what Big Bad Hunter did to piss off the little Hardy boy?"

Hunter lunged at Bret but Shawn held him back. "Hunter…Hunter stop it! What the hell is your problem and why the hell didn't you follow Jeff?"

"It's nothing and Bret wipe that fucking smirk off your face before I do it for you."

"What? You're gonna hit me?" he teased. "Go ahead. If you hit me then Shawn can't say a damn thing about me hitting you back. Better make the first shot count big nose because when I get my hands on you—

"SHUT IT!" Shawn screamed. "GOD…dammit I'm not in the mood. Hunter, why didn't you go with Jeff or should I call and ask for myself?"

Hunter sighed. "Shawn it's…"

"What…did you do?" Shawn asked slowly. Hunter looked up at him, his eyes practically giving him away. "What does it have to do with me? Did he forbid you to do the interview and you ignored him?" Hunter shook his head. "Okay…but he's mad at you about me. This part I'm right about." Hunter nodded. "Alrighty then. So what is it?" he laughed, throwing up his hands in defeat. "It's _always_ my fault so lay it on me. What did I do this time?"

There was a long pause before Hunter finally answered. "I…dreamt of you." Bret snickered at this earning another angry glare from Hunter.

"Hunter? Hunter ignore him and look at me. You had a dream about me. Big deal. I dream about you all the time so what's the big deal? Is Jeff that fucking insecure to think I'd actually try to take you from him?"

"No."

"Then what is it dammit?!"

"I…kind of…Shawn I…" Hunter did not want to say this in front of Bret but if he left now then it would make him look like a coward. "Alright fine. Shawn I sort of called out your name last night and Jeff is pissed at me."

"You said my name in your sleep?"

"No I—

"He probably called out to you during sex," Bret snorted. When Hunter didn't answer Bret's jaw dropped. "Oh my _God_…that's it isn't it?"

Shawn looked up at Hunter shaking his head. "No way. No…fucking…way."

"Shawn, let me explain—

"Are you out of your damn mind? How the hell…? What were you thinking about?"

"Well he…Shawn I tried to tell you yesterday that I—

"No! No, no, no, no! I don't wanna hear it. You love _Jeff_. Not me Hunter! We've been through this countless times."

"Yeah well blame _him_," Hunter growled pointing at Bret. "If he'd a stayed in fucking Canada where he belongs instead of deciding that he'd rather fuck up your life again then I wouldn't be feeling like this!"

"Like what Hunter? Both of you…get it through your thick skulls! All of this…all of this is all in your heads! It's not _real_! You don't love me! They're all just memories! It's the past and it's called "the past" for a fucking reason!"

"Shawn I'm sorry but I'm not Hunter," Bret growled. "You know what we had was real and you can't tell me that you don't feel anything for me. We made love last night Shawn. You never, _ever_ would have allowed it to happen if a part of you didn't want it."

"That's why I can't stand you Bret!" Hunter growled pushing his way past Shawn. "You always do this to him! He'll decide that he wants to move on and then you come back, whisper sweet words in his ear reminding him of the past and then you rope him in. You know he's weak and incapable of hating so you use it to your advantage."

"Oh right. Like you haven't done the same over the years?" he spat. "Stop trying to sound so noble Hunter! You and I both know the real you."

"And I know the real you too!"

"Guys listen…you guys…" Chris started.

"WHAT?!" they screamed. Chris felt like crawling in a hole now but it was too late to stay silent now. "Uh…" He pointed at the door which was now wide open. Shawn…was gone.

* * *

**AN: Goddammit I'm sorry. These guys are killing me! Hunter is killing me but the end of DX is surely near which makes me happy. Maybe Cena can get his Shawn back. Anyway, hope you enjoyed the update. Those two were bound to explode at some point. Ahh the drama in my head. In case I don't update for a while, it's because I don't feel like it. You people who also host H or BH muses can understand right? Anyway, I'm also going to a WWE Supershow and then the Royal Rumble next Sunday so go me! I'll get to see Shawn for the first time in my life and yes, I'm am freaking the hell out.**

_-God I wish this story would end._

_-I love Twitter. :D  
_

_-I want to read more Owen/Shawn fics._

_-I am having serious Shawn/Cena withdrawals._

_-Seriously, you should join Twitter. Fan girls + twitter = WIN!_

_-wrestlefan4, Dark Kaneanite, slashburd, and seraphalexiel are seriously the best damn writers on the fucking planet. Read their fics._

**_"Closure" by Seraphalexiel (Bret/Shawn/Hunter)_**

**_"Past and Present" by wrestlefan4 (Jericho/Bret/Shawn/Hunter)_**

**_"A Life Without Love Is No Life At All" by slashburd (Bret/Shawn)_**

_**"Their Final Confrontation" by Dark Kaneanite (Bret/Shawn/Undertaker)**  
_

_-READ THOSE FICS! Also, be on the look out for a - and I can't believe the words are coming out of my mouth - a spring prompt. You'll get to request a pairing and IF your request gets chosen, one of my carefully handpicked writers will hook you up._

_-I'm still not through with this fucking fic but in the meantime, there are several other good fics floating around that feature Bret and/or Shawn. Go search and read._

_-Vince muse is looking for a victim._

_-I have a new muse. Her name is Seraphalexiel. o.O She loves Jub Jub._


	26. Kings and Nobles

Adam wasted no time getting to the arena. Randy told him that it was pointless but Adam didn't care because Randy just didn't understand. While a part of this quest was just Adam's curiosity, as John's best friend he'd grown to learn to care for Shawn. Adam always thought Shawn was overrated. The blonde hair and the 'Sexy Boy' persona had always been a disgrace to Adam. Shawn's ring work, of course, was always flawless but Adam just couldn't bring himself to get to know someone who was 40 years old calling himself "Sexy Boy". Plus, Adam grew up in Canada so it was not hard to hate Shawn especially when you were told all your life how self-centered and arrogant he was.

"Prima Donna" was the most commonly used phrase to describe Shawn and when he made his return in 2002, Adam stayed clear of him. Shawn was getting ready to publish an autobiography and once it was released, Adam started to feel a little remorse for the blonde. He read the book from cover to cover, crying a few times about how rough he had it as champion. He really felt sorry for him and thought about reaching out to him…that is until Bret came out and said in an interview that most of Shawn's words were lies. Adam shook his head. He still wasn't sure what was fact or fiction but he could only judge Shawn based on his actions now. Shawn never did anything to Adam personally and if anything, he made his best friend happy which is more than anyone could ever hope for in John's case.

Vince usually got to the arena early in the morning to make sure production was going smoothly while often going through contracts and whatnot in his office. Adam tried to make an appointment with Vince but the old coot wouldn't answer his phone. So Adam decided that it was worth the risk and just barged right inside taking a seat across from him. Vince wasn't busy. He looked over the top of his newspaper with a bored look on his face. "What in the _hell _are you doing here?"

"Vince…Boss…I have a question. Um…some questions."

"No, you can't team up with Randall right now because you're about to be Jericho's new partner. No you _cannot_ have a raise and yes, you _will_ be on both Raw and Smackdown," he droned on, never taking his eyes from his paper.

"Er…that's…good to know," he answered "but uh…that's not what I wanted to talk about."

"I forbid you to go to TNA."

"Um…it's about…Shawn, but okay."

Vince finally put down the paper and sighed. "What's he done now Adam? Or scratch that. Who's messing with him now?"

"Eh…nobody…not really. I just…you know he's been doing that interview with Chris—

"They're actually getting somewhere?" he frowned.

"Uh…yeah um…actually they seem to be getting along just fine um…Bret says he loves Shawn."

Vince quirked his brow. "Did he now?"

"Yeah which is kind of why I'm here." Adam sighed. "Look boss, I know you remember all the shit that went down with JBL a few months back and well…Shawn and John are happy…I mean they _were_ happy."

"Were?"

"Yeah uh…Bret's presence has pretty much got everyone walking on eggshells and acting like fucking lunatics. John broke up with Shawn, Hunter's on the war path, and I can't help but wonder if I should trust Bret."

"Uh…"

"John's my best friend Vince and like…I can't fucking locate him! He just sort of vanished all because of Bret. It's fucking ridiculous!"

"Well what am I supposed to do about it?" Vince asked. "I told Chris my take on it and he did the rest. I'm not responsible for anything they say in that interview."

"Yeah but Vince you know as well as I do that Bret said a lot of awful stuff about Shawn. So…so if Bret hated Shawn's guts so much, why are things so warped? How can Bret love Shawn and how can Shawn just crawl back to Bret?"

"I thought you were a Bret fan?"

"I am but this doesn't make any sense!"

"Adam, some things are better left unsaid. I'll…admit that I knew about their affair but that's all you're getting from me. Unless you talk to Bret or Shawn or…force your way into the damned interview then I have nothing more to say to you."

"But Vince…what about John?"

Vince shrugged. "He's retired."

Adam threw up his hands in defeat before storming out of the room. When he was long gone Vince leaned back in his chair and groaned. _This is going to haunt me for the rest of my life…_ Vince pondered Adam's words some more until they finally got the best of him. He grabbed his phone and called a few people. No one was answering so he left messages. _And now I wait…_

**~*xXx*~**

Both Hunter and Bret darted for the door, but Bret was too slow. Hunter grabbed him pulling him back into the room somehow managing to dodge a fist to the face. Bret shoved Hunter but he merely glared as he got right up in his face, their noses just barely touching. "As if I was about to let you go looking for him again," Hunter growled. "We all know how you two _really_ ended up in bed. You caught him when his guard was down…when he was weak, defenseless. Kind of like he was when you two first met."

"Whatever Hunter. You're just mad because I got him and you don't."

"What a childish thing to say."

"This coming from the guy who did everything in his power to touch Shawn on TV when you were in DX years ago. You knew I couldn't do a damn thing when we were taping so you made sure to keep your hands all over him to piss me off."

"Yeah I did but you deserved it," he laughed.

"You also kissed me before," Bret smirked.

At this Hunter looked livid. "I did NOT—

"Sure you didn't Hunter," Bret mused. He pushed his way past Hunter and took a seat. He stared back and Hunter clearly amused by his indifferent look.

"Bret—

"Well you're here. You might as well fess up to all your bullshit Hunter. Truth is you kissed me a couple times. Granted you were probably drunk off your rocker but you did what you did and you know it," he smirked.

Hunter looked like he was about to lunge at Bret but then he paused, a slow smile creeping on his face. "Hn…well, alright. Maybe I _did_ kiss you a few times. I mean, not gonna lie. You and Shawn were very attractive – mainly Shawn – but you weren't bad looking either. But…you forget Bret, I may have initiated the kiss, but you would always end up the dominant one, shoving your tongue down my throat—

"Why you—

Hunter threw his hands up as Bret hovered over him. "Hey! You started it," Hunter grinned. "Now if you want to go there then fine. We'll go there but you tell, _I_ tell. That's how it goes Pinky."

Bret rolled his eyes. "I don't have time for this. I'm going to get Shawn."

"Then I'm coming with you."

"Like hell you are!"

"You leave, I leave," Hunter smirked. "What are you gonna do about it? Hit me?"

"No, I won't hit you," Bret smirked. "But uh…remember what happened the last time you tried to take Shawn from me?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," Hunter said with a shrug. "I've been trying to take Shawn from you since Kevin left for WCW so what else is new?"

While both men stood there glaring at one another, Chris was trying hard not to laugh out loud. They were worse than a couple of teenagers and it was kind of cute. Still though, they were too old to be acting like this and now that Chris thought about it, it kind of made him feel guilty. Just a few months ago he was part of the crew treating Shawn like he was a child; like a man who couldn't make his own decisions. Chris supposed it was because Hunter and Bret loved Shawn very much but that didn't make it right.

After a moment Bret sat back down in his seat, Hunter taking the seat next to him. "I was kidding big nose. I didn't really want you to come to the interview. You just ruined my moment with my princess."

"Oh good for me. And you shouldn't have called me a coward."

"Stop taking everything so personally," Bret grumbled.

"Can't help it," Hunter grinned. "Now are you ready to go retrieve our princess?"

"You mean _my_ princess and no. Not if you're tagging along."

"Guess we're just gonna sit here then."

"If that's the case," Chris interrupted. "How about I talk to the two of you instead? I mean, Hunter you did say you wanted to participate and well…if Shawn's not here then I doubt the two of you can get into too much trouble." Chris cut his eyes towards the door which was still cracked. The two guys looked at it grumbling something that sounded like "whatever" which made Chris smile. "Well then. I'll start with you Hunter. Why did you hate Bret so much? You hardly even knew him."

"It's because he's a fucking lunatic," Bret offered.

Hunter looked over at him frowning. "That's why I _still _hate him. He's unreasonable, selfish—

"So are you," Bret sang.

"And he takes things for granted," Hunter finished. "Shawn was so precious and Bret treated him like shit. I hated it! I fell hard for Shawn on day one—

"Like most men," Bret added nonchalantly.

"And to watch this selfish bastard play him…it just sickened me. Shawn was like a toy or a fucking puppet and Bret pulled the strings."

"I wouldn't put it quite like that big nose," he laughed.

Hunter growled. "You think this is funny?"

"Yeah, I do actually," he smirked.

"You know Chris? How about I give you an example?" Hunter offered.

"Uh…sure," Chris answered.

"Let's see…have you guys talked about Shawn's first title run?"

Bret shot Hunter a knowing look. "I know what you're going to tell but that doesn't prove anything. Shawn and I were pissed at each other _before_ the big match, mainly due to your planting seeds in his head. After the match was just my way of making up with him."

"Riiiiight, then why are you growing so defensive all of a sudden?" Hunter accused. "It's no big deal right? It was you not me so what harm will telling this little story do?"

"Hunter—

"Shawn and Bret had a big fat blow up about Wrestlemania 12—

"Wait a damn minute Hunter. Fuck!" Bret sighed. "I'm not about to let you tell this story without defending myself first. Before you talk about Shawn being pissed at me, you need to know that I was justified in being pissed at Vince. I may have taken it out on Shawn but Vince screwed me over. He promised me…"

Bret's voice trailed off. Just saying Vince's name was enough to trigger tender memories he really didn't want to think about. Of course, it was bound to happen eventually considering the fact that Vince was the evil mastermind behind Montreal, but that wasn't the only reason he was wary to speak of Vince. Next to Shawn, Vince was the other person he'd learn to confide in about things. Their relationship was solid as a rock, until Shawn came along. It was selfish and a little childish of Bret to blame Shawn for his problems with Vince, but Vince was like a second father…or something to him before Shawn came along batting his eyelashes.

"Well? What did he promise you?" Hunter asked. "Better talk now Pinky or I'm telling."

"Tell what you want!" Bret snapped. "I don't give a damn – no. Wait. Hell I'll tell it. Besides," he smirked, cutting his eyes at Hunter. "I'm sure you want the play by play so here goes…"

***~*~***

Shawn was still pissed at him, but Bret didn't care. That's why he merely walked off when Shawn told him to get the fuck out of the ring. He had a point. It was his time to shine so Bret let it go. Besides, he was planning to pay him a visit after his celebration anyway. Rolling around that ring with him for an hour was the only contact they'd had in almost a month. Shawn was totally focused in the ring the entire time but not Bret. There were times when they were in rest holds that he'd recall a time when playful wrestling turned into red hot sex. Just thinking about it made him groan. He needed to talk to him. Shawn was probably going to yell at him again but Bret didn't care. He'd take it and then hopefully take him. Shawn was very difficult to deal with at times, but Bret knew he'd come around. He always did.

Bret went to his private locker room and grabbed a quick shower. He didn't bother to get dressed afterwards. He just wrapped a towel around his waste and headed out the door. He stopped short when he saw who was lurking outside of Shawn's private room. Bret rolled his eyes. "You. _Always_ you."

Hunter smirked. "Yep. Always me. What the hell do you want? Shawn's pissed at you."

"I know which is why I'm going to apologize."

"Like _that's_ gonna do much good this time."

Bret shrugged. "He's my lover and I owe him an apology."

"You mean _former_ lover," Hunter teased. "I think you may have really done it this time Bret and you know what?" Hunter lowered his voice to barely a whisper. "I'll be right here to pick up the pieces of his broken heart."

Bret quirked his brow. "You really are dumber than you look. You must don't know…" Bret shook his head. "I tell you what. Why don't you stay right where you are."

"Oh I don't plan on going _any_where," he said smugly. He leaned against the wall, his arms folded across his chest. "I wanna hear this."

Bret brushed past Hunter and walked inside. As expected Shawn was just stepping out of the shower, a big white towel wrapped around his waist. Bret leaned against the wall watching his princess as he combed through strands of silk, never realizing that he was being watched. Bret smiled as he quietly crept behind him throwing his arms around him.

"HEY! What the—

"Shh…princess it's just me," he grinned, kissing his neck.

"Oh some nerve you got!" Shawn shoved him away angrily. "I hate your _fucking_ guts! Get _away_ from me!" he screamed. Hunter was just outside the door listening. He was laughing so hard that he was having a hard time breathing. Bret thought maybe he heard laughter but he ignored it and watched highly amused as Shawn called him every bad word in the book. 'I hate your fucking guts' and 'Fuck you' and a few 'You assholes'. The entire time he stood there he tried to feign a look of hurt. It was a patronizing act but when Shawn threw a tantrum, it was best to just shut up and take it. After about ten minutes of screaming, Shawn finally got tired and started throwing things in his gym bag, still muttering 'I hate you' under his breath. Bret grabbed his shoulders forcing him back against the wall. "LET ME GO! I HATE YOU!" Shawn kept flinging his arms wildly until Bret's patience finally got the best of him. He snatched the towel from around Shawn's waste and while he was distracted, he pressed his body against him, pinning him to the wall. "BRET—

The Hitman grabbed his arms forcing them above his head. Shawn thought to knee Bret in the groin but was prevented by Bret's knee, resting comfortably against his member. Shawn rolled his eyes. "What are you playing at Bret?" he snapped. "I just won the belt from you, the selfish bastard who didn't want to put me over after all that talk you did about the two of us making art. You're a liar and a—

Bret shut him up by shoving his tongue down his throat, engaging him in a kiss he fought like there was no tomorrow. Bret had to coax him into it by using his knee to rub his cock until it stood erect. "Bret, get away from me," he pleaded. "I don't-ahh…stop it," he breathed. "This isn't fair!"

Bret nipped at ear playfully. "I love you," he whispered.

"No you don't," Shawn pouted. "I hate you and you hate me now please – ahhh fuck Bret stop." But the Hitman knew his body all too well, touching him in all his favorite places while the blonde helpless and at Bret's mercy. "Bret…"

"I meant what I said about the art love. We made art in the ring tonight that will stand the test of time and I was more than happy to put you over."

"Liar!" he breathed, even though his body was now arching into Bret's touch, a flame that he'd been starved of for almost a month. Bret took his lips again, kissing him hard and drinking in that raw passion that almost spilled over in the ring. "Mn…Bret…God…"

"I've missed touching you…hearing you moan…making your whimper…and making you cum." Bret quickly dropped to his knees taking Shawn into his mouth giving him no time to escape. The blonde lost control quickly grabbing Bret's locks fucking his mouth.

"Bret, Bret, fuck Bret…I'm…so – ahh – I'm gonna cum!" Bret sucked hard on Shawn's cock, his teeth grazing his sensitive member until his lover finally exploded. Bret swallowed every drop, his sweet taste that he'd been crying for rolling down his throat. He stood up and grabbed Shawn's hips, lifting him into the air as he slowly entered his tight heat. "Ahhhh God!"

Bret moved in and out of him slowly, the blonde's legs wrapping tightly around his waist. He'd missed this. God how he'd missed the feeling of Shawn's slick, wet body arching into his. Shawn smelled so fucking good and it didn't help that Bret knew just what to do. Shawn responded to every kiss, every touch and every thrust, saying his name, whimpering softly as he moved slowly. But soon Shawn needed more, the slow pace being almost too much for him to bear anymore. Far too long had it been since he'd been touched and like Bret, he needed it – thirsted for it even.

"Harder Bret! Please…more…fuck me harder…" he pleaded, his smaller hands clinging to flesh he'd only been able to touch in his dreams.

Bret sucked hard at the tender flesh of his neck, a wry smile creeping on his face as he suddenly remembered that Hunter was waiting outside. He smiled. "Say my name princess."

"I…Bret _please_…" he begged. Shawn was hard again and knew that just one more hard thrust could quite possibly be his salvation.

"Say it beautiful," Bret murmured. "Tell me my name princess." He pinched the blonde's nipples making him whimper, the raw need practically electrifying both their bodies. Bret thrust a little harder. "Bre…Bret my…"

"Say it," he growled.

"Fuck Bret! My King," he screamed. "My fucking _King_…you're my king – fuck let me cum!" he screamed.

"You know it." Bret lifted him high and plunged into him hard one last time, their loud cries echoing through the room and the hall. Shawn collapsed against Bret spent from their actions but still pissed at him for taking advantage.

"I hate you," he pouted.

"No you don't," Bret teased. "I'm your king and you're my princess."

"Ugh! But you always do this!" Shawn snapped. "You…you piss me off but then you come back later and kiss me, making it all better! I was serious this time Bret! I want to hate your fucking guts!"

Bret cupped his face kissing him again. "Then hate me," he said softly. "But I could never hate you. I love you." He pulled the tired, frustrated blonde into his arms comforting him in the way that only he could. Shawn buried his face in Bret's chest, breathing in his scent and taking advantage of their time together while his hate quickly dissolved. Bret was right whether he knew it or not. Shawn loved him with all his heart and soul. "Mine," Bret whispered. He kissed the top of his head. "Still my Shawny. Still my beautiful, sensitive princess…at least I hope you are," he teased.

Shawn looked up at Bret, drawing the raven haired man in with his beautiful blue jewels. "Forever."

Bret chuckled softly. "Glad you came around princess." Bret brushed past him and grabbed his old belt off the shelf. He stared at it for a moment shaking his head. "It looks kind of big for you princess. Come let me see you put it on….no. I'll do it." Bret hovered over Shawn lifting the belt over his head placing it around his waist. Shawn turned to face him making Bret smile proudly. "You look so hot wearing nothing but that. I should take a picture."

"You…you really think it looks alright? And…we fought earlier but…is it okay? Is it _really_ okay that I have this now?"

"You're so irresistible when you're all innocent." Bret kissed his cheek. "Of course baby. You and I worked our asses off out there and you…hate to admit it but you're quicker than I am now. I knew there was something special about you the day we first met. I'm proud to have you as my champion princess."

Shawn finally smiled for the first time since his celebration in the ring. "And I'm proud to have you as my king."

"You know…the night's still young. How about we go back to my room and have our own private celebration? I'll feed you, make love to you…make love to you some more…"

Shawn laughed. "You gotta eat too silly."

"Oh I am," he teased. "You're my main course. Now let's get the hell out of here. I'm starving!"

***~*~***

"Shawn and I went back to the hotel and well…you draw your own conclusions _Mr. King of Kings_."

"Damn right I'm his King of Kings," Hunter spat. "Always will be."

"You'll never be like the real king Hunter," Bret snorted. "But I will take credit for being the inspiration for your new gimmick."

"Whatever."

Chris cleared his throat earning their attention again. "Wow Hitman. You two made up quick," Chris noted. "So the rumors of him telling you to fuck off after the match are true?"

"Yeah but it wasn't that big of a deal. Like I said, we had a huge blow out about it courtesy of Vince McMahon. At the time, I blamed Shawn more than Vince because I felt like…hell I don't know what I felt."

"Like an insecure, tiny bastard," Hunter growled.

"Insecure? Maybe. Tiny? Not so much," Bret shot back.

"I still can't believe you did that to me," Hunter grumbled. "You forced me to listen to you make love to him and I…I still can't believe he just gave into you like that."

"You didn't know him then and you still don't know him like I know him," Bret replied. "He was my lover and my baby Hunter. I really did love him more than anything in this world. If you thought that little blow out was going to push him into your arms then you were dead wrong. I only did that to prove a point. All couples have their share of problems. Just…Shawn and I had more than the usual fair share. Despite that we still fought for our love. We fought and we fought—

"Until you gave up on it," Hunter finished.

"I never—

"Yes you did," Hunter spat. "You stopped fighting. The battle got to be too exhausting and in the end you chose your pride over your fucking heart. How pathetic!"

"Fuck you Hunter! You don't know shit about me!"

Hunter shook his head. "You know Bret, its funny. Now that I'm hearing all of this from you, there's no doubt in my mind that Shawn was head over heels for you. Just…let's throw in some real talk here. If I had a guy say all those things to me that you said to Shawn, I'd be putty in your hands Bret. I'd…I wouldn't want anybody else."

"What's your point genius?"

"Nothing it's…I'm just overwhelmed right now." Hunter leaned over in his chair burying his face in his hands. He remembered that night and what a night it was. He listened as Shawn dropped f-bombs left and right only to have him turn around and scream "Bret, my King" at the top of his lungs. It was a breathy, orgasmic cry that almost made Hunter cry from want. He left the arena after that. He was hard as a rock and he was pissed; so pissed that he cried all the way back to his room. Shawn had no idea at the time and neither did Bret, but Hunter was in love with Shawn. He loved that blonde so much and probably loved him the moment he said, "Hi". He just couldn't understand why Shawn was so loyal to Bret. From Hunter's POV, Bret was nothing but an arrogant, selfish, whiny bastard who kept Shawn on a type of leash. He couldn't – or in Hunter's mind – wouldn't be with Shawn but yet no one else could have him. But now…he had to admit that maybe, just maybe he was wrong.

"Hunter?" Chris called out to him but Hunter didn't answer. Instead he wiped his eyes then turned to Bret, shaking his head.

"I understand how you feel Bret, but even you've got to know that we don't deserve him." Bret had never seen Hunter cry and the thing is, while he shouldn't have felt sorry for him a part of him did. He felt sorry because he could relate. Watching Shawn each night in the ring with Hunter hurt like hell from over at WCW. It was like a knife to the heart that was twisted a little bit more each and every night until he died, his career ending concussion a synonym for death to him. The thought alone helped Bret clear his conscious of any regret he may have felt turning it into resentment.

"Am I supposed to do the noble thing and just give up on him?" Bret asked softly.

"Noble?" Hunter scoffed. "What would you know about noble?"

"No Hunter. What do _YOU _know about noble? I never would have sank so low as to make you listen to that had you fucked off. You taunted me night after night because you _knew_ I was in a position where I couldn't tell anyone about me and Shawn. Add that to Vince adding you to his list of favorites and my life was a living hell! Shawn…" Bret scoffed. "I worked so hard for so long to protect him. I wanted to keep him away from guys like you because I knew he wasn't strong enough to…but all of you _used_ him. You took advantage of him and you all love to use Montreal as a fucking excuse for why things happened the way that they did!"

"You used him too Bret!" Hunter shot back. "You used his weakness to get to him every time. How is that any different than what I did to get in your head? You…you were always in his head Bret, pulling him back when he could have been moving forward. All you cared about was yourself!"

"I—

"Your family!" Hunter spat. "I have to blah blah my brother Owen," he mocked. "I have this undying _need_ to be champion again because Canada demands it. I have to have this huge contract to stroke my ego reminding me that I am still needed and even though traditionally the champ should get paid more, _I'm_ more important than the champ because I'm Big Bad Bret Hart."

"Hunter. I'm warning you. Your face is about to meet my fist."

"You can dish it but can't take it?"

"Fuck you!"

"No thanks," he growled. "I'm nobody's bitch."

"Then fuck off. You're not needed here anymore."

"Fine, but I got one more thing to say before I go."

"By all means please say it."

"You and I both did some childish things back then and for my part, I apologize. I'm sorry for trying to break you two up because I really thought you didn't love him. If you could see your relationship from me or Kevin's point of view, it looked like Shawn was nothing but a toy for you. Just a nice fuck every now and then."

"You were wrong."

"Yeah…I guess so, but that doesn't change things Bret. I still think that Shawn's in a place right now that you don't fit into."

"This coming from the guy who also wants him back."

"Yeah well unlike you Bret, I don't know what I want. My actions today…and all the other times I "loved" Shawn were spawned from my need to protect him all the time. I have been through hell and back with Shawn from drug addictions and drinking to taking a back seat to Mr. Texas Tramp as he whored himself out to drown the pain. I do love him – always will – but I know deep down that he's right. He and I aren't meant to be and neither are the two of you."

"I think you're wrong."

"Whatever man. All I can say is…good luck." Hunter started for the door but stopped short when it suddenly opened. Standing in the doorway with red eyes and a tear stained face was Shawn and he looked as if he wanted to drop dead.

"Sha – Shawn! How long have you been there?" Hunter asked.

"He was there all alone," Chris answered. "And he heard…everything."

* * *

**AN: Want the truth? This chapter gave me HELL! Like seriously. Egos clashing plus my attempt at recreating the sex scene that kept flashing through my head. Oh well...Good news people. I think I can finish this in a few more chapters. I didn't realize I was this close to Montreal. Bwahahaha YESH! And I cannot WAIT til I'm done with this fic. It will be a burden off of my shoulders. **

_-Hope it wasn't too fluffy for you but men in love are entitled to some fluff. Besides it was completely justified considering Shawn was difficult to deal with. Think of it as Bret's way of pacifying the situation._

_-Hunter's finally coming around...maybe. Hell who the fuck knows? For all I know he might kill Bret in the next chapter._

_-All hail The King of Kings...*snickers* Couldn't help that one._

_-Shawn is being Shawn again. We'll eventually get more from him but I still have to get a little of Vince's POV in and Mark's. Will probably save Mark for last but no promises._

_-Jub Jub...er...Jibble will be back in the picture soon provided Sera muse can get him to buck up some more. So far it's working._

_-I have the strangest urge to write about cabbages. o.O_

_-I still want to write a fic about a naive young girl who wants to be a star in the WWE. Evil Vince is laughing._

_-My Hunter muse wants to do Owen. o.O_

_-John Cena muse is making me write another fic. Why? Because he's my OTP and is tired of Bret getting all the attention. Go figure. Oh well. I agree. Cena Bret.  
_

_-Not trying to make you hate Bret or Hunter but young men have always been insecure blah blah._

_-Seriously, this might be the last update for a while. I told you in the last chapter that I'm going to the Royal Rumble this year so it depends on my time...and Hunter._

_-I love the fact that there's a Team Hunter, a Team Bret, a Team Jeff, a Team Jub and a Team Cena. I LOLed so hard at this. :D_

_-Thanks to all of you who have been reviewing. Maxx, really glad you took a chance at reading this. FicFource and others that are on twitter listening to me rant, thank you guys for being there, giving me inspiration and cabbages. Sera, thank you for "Texas Tramp". It was befitting this update._

_-All of you should sub my main profile. Why? Because there's a Spring prompt in the works. If you saw the Christmas one then you know what I'm talking about. Writers, clear your schedule and fanfic whores be thinking of requests. I should have it up before the week is out. _

_-If you're not on Twitter, you're seriously missing out. And with that, I am out. Hope you enjoyed the update!_


	27. Session 9: The End of the Kliq

AN: I know it's been a while so to help you out, this is gonna jump around a bit, but it starts where we left off with Vince and Adam. If you go back and read the first part of the last chapter, you'll see what I mean.

* * *

Vince slammed his phone down on the receiver cursing under his breath. Just what the hell was Chris Irvin up to now? Vince never really figured they would make it an hour let alone almost three full days with this interview which is why he was now just a tad bit concerned. Vince leaned back in his chair closing his eyes as he recalled memories of his own; memories he wished were nothing more than bad dreams for everyone's sake…

**~*~**

"You wanted to see me Vince?" Bret closed the door quietly behind him taking a seat across from Vince. The room was pretty dark aside from the light peeking in from the blinds. Most of their meetings were always like this, mainly because Vince liked to leave the impression that he was alone most times. A lot of the roster would get offended if they knew how close Bret was to the boss so they usually kept their meetings low key. It was for the best.

Vince leaned forward across his desk smiling at his WWE Champ. "Yes, I did. Bret we need to discuss this year's upcoming Wrestlemania. I have big plans and I need you to come through for me."

Bret quirked his brow. "Usually when you say something like that it doesn't bode well for me." He frowned. "So you're breaking your promise to me again right?"

Vince sighed. "Bret that's not what I'm doing. The audience is changing; WCW is really starting to gain momentum and I need to create new stars otherwise I could very well be in serious trouble in the next few months."

"In other words I'm not doing the job for you," he said accusingly.

Vince sighed. "Bret, that's not what I meant."

"Yes it is!" he said hotly. "If you're trying to be upfront well tell the whole truth and not half truths. You should know I don't take too kindly to being lied to."

Vince stood to his feet and walked around his desk to stand next to Bret. He reached out to touch him but Bret stood as well to avoid his touch. "Bret, you're not being fair. At least listen to my proposal."

"It's him right?" he asked softly.

Vince blinked for a moment wondering if Bret somehow already knew despite Shawn not even knowing yet. "Er…"

"I only have one equal in this company Vince."

Vince thought about his words before a smile slowly crept up on him. That was one of the things he loved most about Bret Hart. Even though he was champ and even before then, he was always watching the competition. That was why he was so good. He knew that if he wanted to stay on top, he would have to find a way to stay a step ahead of everyone else only this time he kinda slipped, but Vince knew why. It's hard to see someone as your direct competition when you're in love with them. How could you bring yourself to be that much better than the one you love? It would probably feel a little shallow; as if you didn't want your significant other to succeed. On the other hand, you would be purposely neglecting yourself. It was kind of a lose-lose situation in Vince's view, but it was too late now. He had no choice but to put the belt on Shawn. WCW was really turning up the heat splitting their ratings until they were almost equal to Monday Night Raw's. It wasn't that Bret wasn't drawing, but Shawn was way over now and had been over ever since his feud with Diesel. It's been almost a year and Shawn had nothing to show for it. It was time to give the kid a chance to show what he can do. After all, unlike his friends, at least he chose to stay and that said a lot about his character despite the locker room gossip.

"I'll take your silence as a yes."

"I'm sure you won't have any problems working with him…or am I mistaken?"

Bret shrugged. "Don't know. That's gonna depend on him."

Vince closed the gap between them, squeezing Bret's shoulders gently. "Look Bret, you said it yourself that he was your only equal. He's just as over as you are now so…so I got to let him try."

"Sure it's not cuz he's so _pretty_?" Bret grumbled.

Vince shook his head. "Bret, you know you're my number one guy. Always have been and if you stick around—

Bret whipped around furiously glaring daggers at his boss. "What do you mean by if I stick around?" he snapped. "You know full well that me and my family are the most loyal men you have on this roster! Don't even try me like that Vince. If anything you should probably worry about your pretty little diva. His friends all went running off to the competition so whose to say that him and his new boyfriend aren't next huh?"

Vince shook his head sighing. "Don't you know I've considered that Bret? You know me. I look at all the possibilities but I don't think he's gonna leave. I believe in my heart that if he really wanted to go, he would have left by now. I think—Bret I think he wants to stick around and prove himself."

"To who? To you right because he has nothing left to prove to the guys. They all know he's good, but they also know he only cares about his little Kliq."

"That Kliq is now dead thanks to Kevin, Sean, and Scott. It's just him and the rookie Hunter."

"Rookie my ass," Bret scoffed. "You just don't know him like I do. He's so full of shit that I have a hard time breathing when I'm around him. He's nothing but trouble and if Shawn wins that belt I can assure you it's not going to be good. Shawn's not ready Vince."

Vince frowned. "Now look Bret, you know I value your opinion above all others, even some of my closest confidants like Patterson, but you know full well that kid's earned this."

"I'm telling you Vince he's not ready and I don't mean that in the way that you think."

"Then explain."

Bret sighed. "You know I hang out with him a lot. He's…sort of a friend."

Vince raised his brows. "A _friend_?"

Bret looked away, his face probably turning hot but because of the lighting, Vince had no proof. He could only tell by the way Bret was shifting uncomfortably that he'd pretty much hit the nail on the coffin. "Look Vince. He—He's got the ring talent. I'll give him that but his self esteem is shot. He won't be able to handle it. He can barely handle it now. The guys are always gossiping about him, saying things that are untrue and he just sort of falls apart. If it wasn't for me…"

Vince could understand what Bret was going through because he too worried about that blonde. So many things got back to him and it started day one with him and Marty. As for the other rumors, he knew they were probably fact. Shawn was hotheaded. Shawn was a diva. Shawn was gay and his lover was standing in front of him trying his best to look out for him as any good man would. Vince understood, but he also knew Shawn needed to do this. If anything it would at least get him the respect he so desperately wanted as well as give him a reason to feel good about himself.

"Bret, my decision is final on this. I just thought you'd like the heads up. I really think he can do this; he just needs the opportunity and your support. He looks up to you. I thought you knew this?"

"I—I do. It's just—

"You worry about him and I understand more than you think," he chuckled. "But give him a year and if it goes badly I'll have him return the favor at Mania 13."

Bret still did not look too happy about it but he eventually nodded his head. "Fine, but I'm telling you this is a mistake. And before you ask, I'm not trying to be selfish. Am I happy that once again my title reign is being cut short? No, but because it's Shawn I'm going to do what I _always_ do which is what's best for business. The kid's hotter than me right now so I gots no problem doing the job. I just hope he can handle it."

Vince smiled. "Thanks Bret. I knew I could count on you."

**~*~**

Vince shook his head. Sometimes he wished he would have just listened to Bret, but Shawn was so stubborn, pushing his body to the limit night after night even at house shows so he didn't really have a reason to say no when Patterson suggested it. Shawn was not big at all; just a little fellow and the opposite of what Vince looked for in a champion, but he cared about that blonde just as much as he cared for Bret which was really what swayed his decision in the end anyway.

Vince picked up the phone again, this time dialing a number that he never figured he'd have the guts to try. The number when straight to voice mail and he decided to go ahead and leave a message hoping for the best. If Shawn could do it, so could he. "Hello Bret. This is Vince McMahon…"

**~**~**

Jeff Hardy slowly made his way up the porch steps dragging his luggage. He was so exhausted from his flight. Having to fly two long flights in the span of just a day and a half was a little more than draining. To make matters worse he didn't even know if coming here was the right thing to do, but it was the only place he could go and maybe be able to feel right at home. He dropped the handles of his luggage then rang the doorbell praying silently that someone was home. He waited a minute then rang it once more. For a while it seemed like he was going to be stuck until the door finally opened. "Jeff?"

Jeff lowered his in shame. "I'm sorry," he said softly. "But I didn't know where else to go. I—I left Hunter so—so I guess you were right about him."

"Oh Jeff…" Matt came outside onto the porch even though he was only wearing some tiny boxer shorts and just threw his arms around Jeff. "Don't worry about it. At the end of the day, I still love you no matter what. Come on. Let's go inside. You look like you could use some sleep."

**~*~*~**

"Sh-Shawn!" Hunter could only look down cursing under his breath.

"Oh see now you've done it," Bret grumbled. "Way to go big nose. Once again you've managed to make things worse."

Hunter shot Bret an angry glare. "Don't even try to put all of this on me!" he spat. "You're just as bad…"

The two of them continued to argue while Shawn stood outside the room, shaking his head. He always figured Hunter and Bret had something of a rivalry going on, but he never knew it was this bad. It was no secret that Bret hated Hunter back then and after Montreal, Hunter was only too kind to voice his extreme dislike of the older Hart. Shawn never really paid them any mind though. When he was with Bret, Hunter could hang it up because no one was ever going to just break them up. He loved Bret with all his heart and Hunter knew this all too well. On the other hand, at some point during his off and on again relationship with Bret, Shawn _did_ grow feelings for Hunter, but it wasn't until sometime after Montreal did he allow things with Hunter to lead them to a physical relationship.

Shawn wiped his eyes. A part of him wanted to just run away and start his search for John, but he also knew that if he left right now, too many lives were going to continue to be screwed up. Hunter was already confused about his feelings for Jeff when Shawn knew all too well how much that kid loved Hunter and vice versa. And Hunter could ignore it all he wanted, but Shawn remembered just how miserable Hunter was a few months ago when he thought Jeff was gone for good. As for Bret, it was still unclear to him the extent of his feelings. Sure Bret claimed to love him and Shawn would be lying if he said he didn't still have deep feelings for him, but did they really want to try this again? Shawn had it good with John. There were no worries. There were no hidden agendas. Everything had been laid out on the table from both sides since day one but with Bret you never knew. Bret had a family and kids; something Shawn only had in his dreams and for him to just throw it away blindly because of an old flame made Shawn worry.

Shawn took a deep breath and headed back inside where the two rivals were still going at it something fierce.

"Oh yeah Bret, like you're a fucking saint!"

"Neither one of us were saints Hunter, but at least I had good reasons for my actions! You tried to take him away from me and you didn't even know me like that! I had a right to protect what was mine at all costs and you know full well that if the shoe was on the other foot, you'd have done the same. Hell, you're doing it now. You're trying to protect someone you love but the problem is Hunter, he's not yours to protect anymore."

"Then what's your excuse for jumping down my throat then?" Hunter shot back. "He's not yours either. In fact, you have a wife and kids which makes you look even worse than me—

"All of my children are practically grown Hunter," Bret growled. "And as for my wife…it's like you said about Jeff Hunt. It's possible that I don't love her anymore."

"Oh that's priceless—

"Both of you shut it!"

They both turned to see Shawn standing in the room shaking his head in disbelief. "I can't believe you two sometimes and before either of you open your mouths to cough out some kind of excuse, just save it. I heard everything and it didn't help that the two of you just ignored me to continue a 15 year old rivalry over someone who doesn't belong to either of you! How many times do I have to tell people that I am not some fucking prize to be won?" Shawn turned to Hunter. "You should know better than Mr. Ego here that I'm not putting up with this crap anymore. You found that out when you went all Cerebral Assassin on my boyfriend a few months ago and you…"

He turned to Bret sighing. "I'm too tired and frustrated to even bother. You can keep acting like you've already won Bret but I am not to be won. I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions and I've already told you that I'm not going to just run back into your arms. We slept together but you know that hardly means anything to me. I've slept with _plenty_ of guys in the past Bret and just like last night, it meant absolutely _nothing_ to me. My heart still belongs to man who has felt threatened by you since they day I told him 'I love you'. I'm almost willing to bet my soul he left to give me some space. I'm not happy about it, but maybe it was for the best. Now…" Shawn pushed past the two of them reassuming his seat for the interview. "I'm ready to finish this up because I'm getting nothing short of a migraine headache. Hunter, you can stay or you can go, but I'm not gonna sit here and listen to the two of you argue the whole time. It's bad enough without you being here."

The two rivals finally shut their mouths not daring to contradict Shawn for fear of setting him off again which was something they both didn't want. Instead Bret took his seat while Hunter stood in a corner near the back, just a few feet shy from where Shawn was sitting. Chris waited for moment to see if all was calm and when no one offered to start things off again, he took a deep breath and looked to his notes for help. "Er…let's see. Well…um Shawn. I believe – before things got out of hand – we were talking about the night you won the belt for the first time."

"We can move on because there's nothing to tell after that," he said frankly. "In fact, why don't we speed things up a bit and skip to the days leading up to Montreal?"

"Well Shawn…I'd like that very much but you see, there are a few holes that need to be filled," Chris winced.

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Holes my ass. I'm ready to finish this shit so what holes Chris?" he snapped. "What in the world has got the eager investigator and ruiner of all lives curious?"

Chris held his head down, a little hurt by Shawn's words. Hunter and Bret could only shake their heads, both knowing that it was probably going to be like this for the rest of the day. "Shawn…I'm sorry," Chris managed. "I just—you said you wanted to tell all of your side…clear everything up. I'm just trying to help—

"Oh help," he scoffed. "Like you did a few months ago right?"

"Shawn…" Hunter started but Bret cut him a look that said let it go. Hunter sighed leaning back in his corner half wishing he just would have stayed away. From this point on it was going to be nothing but hell on earth and he wasn't sure if he was ready for this.

"Well?" Shawn snapped. "I'm waiting Chris."

Chris reluctantly started up with his questions again, saying a silent prayer to help him get through it. _Just one more day God and I swear I'm done…_ "Shawn I wanted to ask you about Kevin and the others leaving you. I—I want to know all about the curtain call and what really happened that led to your very best friend abandoning you for the other company."

"Kevin left because he got tired of me," Shawn offered. "End of story."

"Now Shawn, you know that's not true," Hunter piped up. "Kevin cared about you very much."

"Apparently not enough to trust me and stay by my side."

"Shawn, Kevin left because his eyes got big. His friends that he left behind at WCW the first time kept calling him up, bragging about how much money they were making. You know Kevin loved his money. Money before honeys as he used to say."

"Whatever Hunter. My best friend, bodyguard and big brother left me behind without even discussing it with me first. Makes me wonder if I really did drive them all away or if I ever really meant that much to them at all…"

Bret was gonna speak up after that but he decided it was probably best if he remained silent. Besides, while he and Kevin had a mutual disliking of one another back then, Bret couldn't honestly judge Kevin as harshly as Hunter. It seemed to Bret now that maybe Kevin was just acting as an over protective brother and when Bret seriously thought about the things Shawn revealed, Kevin was responsible for getting his lover back to him safely many a nights so he kinda owed Kevin. He would say the same about Hunter but no. Hell would freeze over first.

Chris cleared his throat. "Hunter, Shawn knew Kevin a lot longer than you and even confessed to giving Kevin a hard time most nights when he wasn't feeling himself. Can you explain why you think Kevin didn't grow tired of being Shawn's bodyguard considering Shawn's diva behavior? Everyone has a limit Hunter so are you sure Kevin hadn't just reached his yet?"

Hunter shook his head. "Kevin adored Shawn and had it not been for Shawn's loyalty to Bret he probably would have asked Shawn to be his lover instead of Razor. Now Kevin loved Razor unconditionally, but I'm sure he loved Shawn just as much. In fact, I remember the night Kevin told me about his departure. We had a nice long chat about all sorts of things, but mainly Shawn…"

**~~**~~**

Hunter along with Shawn, Pac, and Razor watched the main event for Survivor Series from a small television in the break room. All the guys watched with heavy interest as two men who longed to kill each other outside the ring wrestle one hell of a match. When it was over all of the guys stood around chatting about the match and celebrations until Kevin finally made his way to the break room. He looked plum wore out from his match but he was grinning from ear to ear. Shawn was first to run over to him and jump in his arms. As usual Kevin held him up, planting a quick kiss on his lips. "Baby girl, shouldn't you be elsewhere?" he teased. "I do believe you have a new WWE Champion waiting for his real prize in his private quarters," he said with a wink.

Shawn dropped to the floor grinning up at his best friend. "Oh he can wait. Besides I'd rather wait until that ego of his wears off."

"You'll be waiting forever doll," Pac snickered. "But enough talk of Mr. Excellence. How's about we go get a drink?"

"And just what are we celebrating?" Kevin asked. "I lost!"

"I think he means we want to celebrate the fact that there was no blood shed," Hunter offered. "Hell, I myself am a little more than shocked. There were a few times during that match where I thought for sure you were going to kill him."

"Naa…as much as I'd love to, my love for someone else keeps me from doing it," he said winking at Shawn.

"Yes and I love you for it," he grinned. "Well guys, as much as I would love to stick around, you know there's somewhere I need to be. Gonna go stroke his ego some more."

"And maybe something else as well," Razor added.

Shawn smirked. "That's _his_ job." Shawn bent over just a little shaking his ass in his favorite red tights earning a few cat calls. "And I'll leave you with that. Now if you'll excuse me I have a celebration to attend."

The guys all groaned as Shawn left the room, each one mumbling about how lucky Bret was. "Hey, hey. Let the man go do his thing," Sean said. "Bret's a lucky bastard but that shouldn't stop us from having a good time tonight."

"Yeah, let's just get the hell out of here. I could do with a nice shot of whiskey right about now. Anything to keep my mind off of Shawn's tight ass," Hunter mumbled.

"I'm with him," Sean grinned. "So let's go!"

Kevin put down his glass nodding his head. "Sure guys. I'll meet you at the car in a few. I wanted to have a word with Hunter first."

"Oh alright, but don't be long," Sean said. He and Scott left the room leaving Kevin and Hunter alone. Hunter was a little on edge now because he wasn't expecting any private talks with Kevin so he couldn't help but wonder if he'd offended him in some kind of way.

"Er…is everything alright?" Hunter asked.

Kevin sighed. "I guess, but that's going to depend on you."

Hunter shifted uncomfortably. "Did I do something to piss you off? If it's about my Shawn comment then—

Kevin waved it off. "No, no. I'm not—I don't care if you voice how you feel about Shawn. Just…don't do it around Bret," he joked.

"I'll try to remember that the next time he's in me and Shawn's hotel room."

Kevin laughed. "In all seriousness H, I just wanted you to be the first to know that I'm planning to leave in a couple of months."

"Leave?" Hunter's jaw dropped.

"Yeah man. I think it's time for me to go ya know?"

"But-but what about the Kliq? What about your friends? What about Shawn?" Hunter could not believe this. He'd heard the rumors about Kevin speaking with Bischoff, but he never thought for a second Kevin would actually leave, especially since that would mean leaving Shawn behind.

"I love him. You know I do. I love him so much that…" Kevin shook his head. "You know I love him, but—it's complicated H."

"What's so fucking complicated?"

"Hunter…the only reason I'm telling you this is so that you will have time to figure out what you want to do. Both Sean and Scott are leaving with me, which means that just leaves you and Shawn. I was planning to ask the both of you to come with but something in my heart tells me you'll both say no. Shawn won't leave because of Bret and you…" He reached out and touched his shoulder. "You won't leave Shawn which is why _you're_ the better man H; better than I could even hope to be. I'm not the guy but you…I know you'll take real good care of him for me."

"I—sure Kev, but don't you think…" Hunter looked down at his feet as he was suddenly overcome with feelings of anxiety and dread. He didn't even want to think about how it was going to be without Kevin and the others. He was also dreading having to deal with Hart on his own. "Kevin are you _sure_…?"

"Eric offered us a shitload of money to come back and it's no secret that they're starting to crush us in the ratings. I need to be there Hunt and I would love it if I could bring you all with me but…I just know we're on separate paths. From this point on I'm going one way while you're following Shawn as it should be. One day he'll wake up and realize that he could do so much better," he said nodding towards H, "but for now I just applaud you for sticking it out. I know you love him. Fuck I love baby girl too," he choked out. He reached up to wipe a tear from his face that fell then laughed it off. "Look at me. Crying like a little bitch all because Bret beat me to him. And I think I might be fucking rambling on…"

"Yeah, you are," Hunter joked trying to lighten the mood for fear of crying too. It was all too much to take in at one time. "Say. How about that drink now?"

Kevin wiped his eyes. "Yeah let's get a drink. To Shawn…"

"And the Kliq," H added. He put his arm around Kevin's waist and with forced smiles, they both headed to find the guys.

**~~**~~**

When Hunter finished speaking, Bret had the strongest urge to say something in retaliation to Hunter's story until he looked over and saw that Shawn was fighting tears. "Shawn? Baby are you alright?" Bret asked.

Shawn lowered his head speaking up softly. "This reminds me of the conversation I had with Kevin just weeks before the actual Curtain Call. I almost forgot—well not really. It's just another one of those memories that I tried to push back because it hurt so much. Kevin told me about his plans, but I already knew. I just had this feeling…"

**~*~*~**

"Shawn? Baby girl can we talk?"

"Sure." Shawn and Kevin had just won the tag team championship and they were now standing outside the break room. Shawn had his tag belt around his waist and his IC gold thrown over his shoulder. Both men were pretty exhausted and Shawn was so ready for a shower and a good night's rest. "So what's up Big Sexy?" Shawn asked. He leaned against the wall running a hand through his curly, sweaty hair groaning. "I so need a shower, but I know better than to go in there now. Too many eyes," he joked.

Kevin shook his head smiling. "Such a girl, but you're my baby girl. Always will be no matter what."

Shawn smiled. "Awe, is my big sexy bodyguard feeling sentimental all of a sudden?" he teased.

Kevin shrugged. "A little…well, actually a lot. You see Shawn, I got to tell you something but I don't really want to. Not really."

Shawn's smile quickly faded and was replaced with a frown. "Kevvy what's wrong? Is something the matter?" Kevin looked down, but Shawn quickly closed the gap between then cupping Kevin's face. "Kevin? Kevin look at me. Tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing. It's just…Shawn you know those rumors about me and Scott and Pac? Well they're true. We…we kind of made a deal with Bischoff and next month we're leaving."

Shawn dropped his hands, his heart sinking with them. "Oh."

"I'm sorry baby girl, but I just think it's time for me to move on. You're about to blow up – you and Hunter both while the rest of us are gonna attempt to make a name for ourselves elsewhere."

"Kevin you know you could stay," Shawn said quietly. "You know Hunter and I would never leave any of you hanging."

"Yeah well with Bret – and no offense to your beloved – but with him and his family around, there's not much room for all of us."

"But Kevin—

"Shawn listen sweety. You are it. You are the guy. Bret knows it. Vince knows it. The Kliq knows it." He chuckled. "It's your time to shine baby. If you're constantly worried about the rest of us then that takes away from you doing you. I don't want that when I know I could go elsewhere and be just like you."

"But Kevin," he choked, but he was cut off when the bigger man pulled him into his arms.

"Shawn…baby girl, don't worry so much. Hunter's not going anywhere so you won't be completely alone."

Shawn wrapped his ams tighter around Kevin, sobbing into his chest. "But I want you to stay. I don't want you to go. What am I supposed to do without you? People will hurt me and they already don't see me as a champ. They think I'm weak and—and…"

"Shh…Shawn don't—don't talk like that," he scolded. "Remember what I told you about holding that pretty little head of yours up high?" Shawn simply nodded, his throat too knotted up to speak again. "Well I want you to keep doing it." Kevin stroked Shawn's spine ignoring the stares that people gave them as they walked by. He sighed. "Baby girl, just because I'm not around doesn't mean things have to change for you. I want you to keep going out there night after night tearing it up in the ring. I want you to keep proving why you deserve to be champion and I want you to continue giving Vince hell. And while you're at it, give Bret hell too." This earned him a small laugh. Kevin raised Shawn's head smiling down at him. "I love you ya know? I may be leaving, but I love you more than I can put to words."

Shawn wiped his eyes. "Love you too Kevin." He stood on his toes which gave him just enough height to press his lips to Kevin's. He didn't care who saw or what they said about him and apparently neither did Kevin. He picked the blonde up off the floor pulling him tighter against him. "God I love you," Kevin murmured. "Never forget…"

**~*~*~**

By the time Shawn finished speaking, everyone in the room was practically in tears. Bret was sad because Shawn was sad and it didn't help that he'd been wrong about Kevin all those years. Hunter was crying for the same reason as Bret. He hated see Shawn cry and having to recall how close they both were to Kevin only added to the hurt. Chris was barely holding on and it seemed to be the thing when it came to this interview. Not a day had gone by that Shawn or Bret hadn't left him exhausted from crying so much. "Wow. Shawn I…" Chris wiped his eyes. "So I guess Hunter was right. Kevin did love you. There's no doubt – at least in my mind – that he loved you."

"Maybe," Shawn answered quietly. "But he still left."

"Yeah which lead to the infamous Curtain Call," Chris noted. "And speaking of that, who's idea was it?"

"It was mine," Shawn answered. "Hunter and the others…we talked it over and I even asked Vince about it. Hunter told us Vince said it was alright but apparently the guys in the back didn't like it. Thought it was a spit in the face to the company."

"Bret, how did you feel about it?" Chris asked.

"He felt the same as the others," Shawn answered.

Bret shrugged. "Well yeah. You guys broke kayfabe. You're _never_ supposed to do that even if your best friends are selling out. The wrestling world hasn't been the same since. It's hard for people to buy into what we do now that they know it's not real."

"That's not the point Bret!" Shawn snapped. "Is the job always more important than friends, families or in your case, lovers?"

Bret frowned. "That's not fair and you know it."

"That was important to me Bret!" he snapped. "You…I could do things in public with Kevin and Hunter that I couldn't do with you. They were never afraid to challenge the outside world, unlike you, who were too stuck on his self proclaimed, God-given perfect reputation. These guys were my friends and not just behind closed doors!"

"You can yell and scream all you want Shawn, but you let your feelings ruin our industry. You know the dirt sheets had a field day with this and ever since then—

"I don't really care anymore. I've longed since made up for my mistakes and if I had to do it over again, I still would have hugged my friends that day. Was it right? Probably not. Did I care? Not really because some things are just more important than business. But of course you wouldn't know that now would you?"

"Whatever Shawn," Bret growled. "I'm not going to argue with you over something so trivial. Besides, it's pretty obvious that most agreed with me. Your new little boyfriend paid the price for you. If you ask me, I think that saying you'd do it all over again is a pretty selfish statement. You'd make your best friend pay all over again just to have your moment in the spotlight with Kevvy?"

"Oh don't do this Bret," Hunter griped. "Don't use me against Shawn. I told him many times before that's it alright. Having to scratch and scrawl my way to the top gave me a new perspective on things and I'm damn proud of what I managed to accomplish. Unlike you Bret, I didn't have everything handed to me on a silver platter."

"Goes to show just how much you know about me Hunter. For your information—

"Goddammit will you two shut up?" Shawn snapped. "Stop it. Just…forget it. Curtain Call – bad idea. I get it so can we move on?" The two rivals clamped their mouths shut, but not before damning the other to hell. "Ugh! Thank you now Chris…"

"Uh…right. So um…where exactly do we go from here?" Chris asked.

All of the others sat quietly, neither of them really wanting to speak up. Bret was still fuming at Hunter and was silently praying he'd go away. Hunter wasn't sure if it was his place to decide since this technically wasn't his interview so after several minutes of an uncomfortable silence, Shawn finally broke the silence.

"Oh give me a break," he scoffed. "I'll help you guys out. Chris, the rocky road to Montreal and the end of my career starts here."

* * *

AN: I'm back. I guess. Not sure what's going on in my head as of late. Between my love for Flaircest, Hunter/Cena, and the Sims 2, I just don't quite know. I'd like to finish this one soon as I really don't have too much longer to go. Montreal is right around the corner – or rather a year from now time period wise so we'll see. Shawn's retirement put me in a catatonic state of shock for almost a month, but slowly I'm putting my heart back together again. Hope there weren't too many mistakes. Find any, point them out. I'll fix em eventually.

**FYI**

_- I laughed my ass off when researching for this fic. I laughed because I didn't realize it was Bret that beat Kevin for WWE Championship. I mean I was dying reading that. So um yes. This was actually 100 percent true. The time frame is a little off because the Curtain Call actually took place after Shawn won the belt at Mania 12. It was about 2-3 months afterwards, but for the sake of this story, we're gonna say it happened while Shawn was still IC champion before Mania 12. It works and if it doesn't for you then I'm sorry about your damn luck! (BMI ftw!) I'm not changing it. This shit's hard enough to keep up with as it is. I couldn't remember if I said that Kevin and the others were already gone when Shawn won the belt and when I went back to read, my head was overwhelmed so hopefully I didn't just royally fuck up. (Feel free to let me know if I did. I'll have no choice but to royally fix it or delete this in a fit of rage and fury :D)_

_- Again, not trying to make Shawn look like a God or a whore, but all the Kliq stories make me feel like they were all really, really tight. Even Kevin still tweets about his friendship with Hunter and Shawn so take it how you like. If you're concerned about the kiss then go watch old footage of them. Shawn and Kevin were magic on screen and even Vince said they were practically inseparable. So...I'm using that theory that says if you spend so much time with a person you're bound to grow feelings for them. Shawn and Kevin's love is not like the love between Shawn and Bret so don't get all huffy if the kiss disturbed you. Just get over it because you can't possibly tell me that you don't feel a connection between Shawn and Kevin._

_- Bret's Bret. You either like him or you don't. Oh moody... I kinda missed having that egomaniac in my head. :D_

_- Where's JBL? Well he's around. It's just not his time anymore. In fact, not really sure what lies ahead for him or any of the other couples aside from JoMo and Mark. (Don't worry. JoMo and Mark are my favorite invention. They will stand the test of time in this fic. :D) So DK, tell Marky he doesn't have to worry._

_- I was attacked by a vicious spider while typing this chapter. I'm blaming VKM for that. n_n_

_- Spring prompt…you should be reading those completed fics. All of them are hella good. :D_

_- I actually shipped a het couple. Shawn and Maryse. Guess what? I liked it. T_T Don't judge me._

_- Special thanks to Sera for bringing Shawn back to me. Lava for letting her H sex up my John Cena in frills. Jeri and Thor for making me laugh with Ric-Rod randomness and DK for letting me turn her grumpy deadman into teddy bear Marky Mark! :D_

_- When is the next update? Ha Ha Yeah…right. Someday. Better than never right?_

_- As always, questions...concerns? Feel free to ask when you review. I'll get back to you when I can._

**Recommended Readings**

If you love me then you'll read the following:

1) **"Sins of the Father"** by _**Seraphalexiel **_and cowritten by me and _**wrestlefan4**_ [.net/s/5770984/1/Sins_of_the_Father]

2) **"Sober"** by me (XxShawns_Guardian_AngelxX) and cowritten by the lovely _**slashburd**_ [.net/s/5880964/1/Sober]

3) **"A Big Red Encounter"** by _**Dark Kaneanite**_ [.net/s/5688294/1/A_Big_Red_Encounter]


	28. Session 10: The Road to Montreal Part I

Jeff stayed in bed for most of the next day. He was so exhausted not to mention he felt dead to the world and not just outside but inside as well. He knew he should have hated Hunter for what he did but his heart wouldn't let him. When he first woke up in the middle of the afternoon, he noticed that Matt had left him food by his bed on the nightstand, just like he used to when they were kids. He was almost certain the small cooler contained his old favorites: a club sandwich, a bag of pickle wedges and a Powerade drink since he never really liked soft drinks.

Jeff smiled then rolled over on his back staring up at the ceiling. Hunter called him Shawn. Plain as day he could still hear it in his head underneath all the slapping of skin and yet he still wanted him. He closed his eyes picturing Hunter with Shawn. Always. The love in Hunter's eyes was always there and in all likelihood it would always be there. At first it used to bother him until Hunter kept fighting for him, even after that fiasco with JBL a few months ago. Hunter proved to him that he still loved him very much but as usual he was once again running to Shawn's rescue. It frustrated him to no end that Hunter couldn't let Shawn go and Jeff hated him for it. He hated him and he hated Shawn up until he witnessed Hunter's brutal beat down of JBL and how torn up inside Shawn was.

_"Shawn you can't drive anywhere like this. You'll kill yourself."_

_"I can call a—_

_"You can shut up and get some sleep. No one's going to bother us. Vince gave us the office for the night and we're going to take advantage of it." Jeff walked across the room and picked up a WWE blanket that had been draped over another couch. He kicked off his shoes, rids himself of his tee then sat back down next to Shawn. "We're sleeping here tonight so no arguing."_

_"What about Hu—_

_"To hell with Hunter." Shawn blinked a few times, taken back by Jeff's tone. He certainly wasn't expecting this and though it was touching how much Jeff resented Hunter's actions, Shawn knew love was too hard to find to just give up on so easily._

_"You don't mean that."_

_"I do. I really do. That selfish bastard—_

_"Loves you very much," he finished. Shawn cupped his face looking Jeff straight in the eye. He needed Jeff to understand for both their sakes that giving up on Hunter wasn't the solution._

_"Shawn…"_

_"I have no ill will towards Hunter about our break up and I have no ill feelings towards you. I'll always love him but not the way you can love him."_

_"But Shawn," Jeff choked. "After…after what he did tonight…after the pain he put you through…"_

_"Even I can understand that he did it out of love, even if it __was__ the wrong thing to do. Give him another chance Jeff. I'm sure he loves you very much and will be devastated beyond reason if he lost a gem like you." Jeff was crying again and he didn't know what to do with himself. He pressed his head to Shawn's, gripping his shoulders, sobbing from the pain. "It's alright. It's going to be alright," Shawn whispered. Jeff managed to nod but not before his lips brushed Shawn's. Before he realized what he was doing, he was gripping Shawn's shoulders and kissing his lips. For a moment they both just let go; Jeff's mouth dominating Shawn's while he clung to Jeff for support. Jeff suddenly pulled away from Shawn having run out breath…_

At that moment Jeff knew Shawn's heart was not with Hunter but with John.

_And yet here I am, wanting to blame him all over again despite the fact that I kissed him too._ Jeff laughed a little. It was funny. It was funny and ironic. The same man he bitched and moaned about Hunter still having googly eyes for was the same guy he kissed in Vince's office out of curiosity and loved every second of it too. _Why did I even allow myself to think that the great Jeffery Nero Fucking Hardy would catch a break?_

Jeff forced himself to sit up in bed. It was nearing 5 o'clock and he was certain Matt was probably worried but too afraid to confront him just now. He grabbed the cooler and with lots of effort, forced himself to leave the room and find Matt. Matt was sitting out back on their deck reading a book. Jeff quietly took a seat on the floor in front of Matt leaning back against his legs for comfort. The older Hardy brother looked down at him but remained quiet reading his book. It was times like these where no words needed to be spoken. Jeff was going to be just fine even if moving on wasn't an option.

**X~**~X**

John Layfield woke to the sound of soft knocking on his cabin door. He sat up having fallen asleep in his recliner, his laptop still open. He heard the knocking again, this time a little louder than it was before. He frowned. No one knew about this place except Shawn and for a moment his heart skipped a beat. Was it possible that Shawn came back for him?

"John it's me…Adam. I know you're in there so open up."

John's heart sank just as quickly as it had risen. No Shawn which meant he was probably half way to Calgary by now. "I'm…coming," he forced himself to say. He placed the lap top on the floor then slowly made his way to the door, pulling his silk robe tight around his waist. "Adam…" He rolled his eyes as his friend pushed past him inside the dimly lit room, not bothering to wait for an invitation.

"Adam what the hell time is it?" he asked, rubbing his eyes.

Adam looked around the room, his eyes rounding on the lap top as well as the scattered papers on the bed and on the floor. Adam shook his head. "Working. I can't believe you're working at a time like this." Adam pulled off his leather jacket tossing it on the bed before taking a seat on the bed, shoving all of the papers within arm reach to the floor.

"Adam, what the fuck are you doing? Those are important documents!" he yelled storming towards the bed, bending over to pick them up angrily.

"John you're fucking pathetic and if Bret runs off with Shawn then you fucking deserve it!" he spat angrily. John was being stupid and after all the crap that had taken place in the last few days or so, Adam be damned if he was going to let this go.

"Yeah well he loves him more than me anyway," he grumbled, straightening up the stack and slowly trudging across the room to put them away. Adam's words stung at first but he quickly pushed past it reminding himself that he was lucky to have known what love felt like to begin with.

"John…I don't get you sometimes you know? I mean…I guess what I'm trying to say is that you used to complain to me and the guys all the time about how you couldn't catch a break. You'd—you'd say things like 'If I ever found someone to love me for me then I'd do whatever it takes to hold on to him'. John….Shawn's that guy so I can't help but wonder why you're not even trying."

"Yeah well…" He snapped his brief case shut just as Adam crossed the room taking it out of hand.

"John, look at me." The room was rather dark. John had a few candles lit around the cabin but the cabin was already dark and dreary looking so the candles didn't do much. "John…"

John snatched away from Adam and went across the room to get his lap top off the floor. "Go home to your lover Adam and stop nosin' around other folk's business. What's done is done and it's too late to take it back."

Furious that he'd come all this way to see his best friend who did not seem fit to give him the time of day, Adam stormed behind him, snatching the lap top from his hands.

"Hey! Adam! Give that back and go home! I haven't the time for this nonsense!" John yelled.

"No," he said smugly and then his eyes caught glimpse of the screen and he paused, his face softening a little. It was a picture of Shawn lying in bed on his stomach. His hair was angled over his shoulder so that his face wasn't covered. The light reflected from the picture seemed to hint at sunrise, a streak of light cast over his face. Not very many knew this about John but he also dabbled a bit in photography. "Wow. John that's—that's awesome."

John rolled his eyes as he plopped back down in his chair, resting his head on his fist. "Thanks," he mumbled. "It was taken the morning after we first…" His voice trailed off as he recalled the morning after.

Shawn made love to him no less than three times, doing more to please him rather than himself. He wasn't even sure what to make of it but he knew he couldn't deny his love for him anymore. They both slept rather late or at least late for John. He stirred before Shawn, his new lover still lying on top of him. He remembered easing out of bed, combing the hair out of his face. The sun was shining brightly seeping in through the cracks of the blinds highlighting his gorgeous face. He couldn't resist. Shawn was out of it, having worn himself out the night before. John tip toed across the room and quietly grabbed the camera out of his bag. It took him a while to get the color just right and he was still an amateur at angles, but he wanted to try for moments like these were few in his life. He snapped several pictures and just as he was putting the camera away, Shawn stirred on the bed.

"Mnn…John?" He yawned rolling around on his back smiling at him. "Why aren't you still in bed?"

John chuckled softly as he crossed the room sitting on the edge of the bed. "Oh well you know me kitten. I've never been one for sleeping late. Never had a reason to…until now."

Shawn sat up pressing his lips to John's. "Mn…there will be many more mornings like this John. Trust me."

John smiled. "I do kitten. More than anyone I've ever trusted in this goddamned world."

Shawn grabbed John pulling him back on the bed planting an upside down kiss on his lips. "Okay. That was interesting," he laughed.

"Oiya. Kitten!" He sat up again, but only long enough for Shawn to disrobe him.

"Back. Now," he ordered.

John lazily did as he was told and was immediately topped by the blonde, who proceeded to smother him with tiny kisses. "Mn…Kitten…you're spoiling me."

Shawn paused, smiling down at John. "I plan to spoil you forever…"

"John? John! Are you even listening to me?"

John jumped, sitting up in his chair and blinking. He looked around the room before his eyes finally rounded on Adam. "I must have dozed off."

Adam frowned. "No…no you were staring off in space. What's going on in that head of yours? Have you finally come to your senses?"

John rolled his eyes. "Let it go blondie," he drawled lazily, not realizing that his face was wet.

Adam sighed. "John, you're crying which means a part of you regrets this little stunt you pulled. Go to him," Adam pleaded. "Go back home to your lover. He needs you right now. I can't fathom him taking Bret back after all the horrible shit he said to him over the years. I can't—I just don't see that happening John so please go to him!" Adam quickly crossed the room and dropped to his knees. "John…please listen to me. You need to go home. You need to stop running away and acting like you don't have a fighting chance because you do. You seem to have forgotten how much shit that man went through just to convince everyone that the love is real."

"Was."

"No. No I had it right the first time. It _IS_ real love John. You could never stop loving him even if you wanted to so stop—stop doing this to yourself and get back in the game!" He was frustrated with John and it was really starting to show. "I have never, _ever_ seen you just give up even if it did look hopeless. If you don't fight for him John then you lose all my respect."

John looked away. "I don't even care about respect anymore."

"That's a lie and you know it," Adam growled. "But that's alright. Just let Bret walk into your lives – never mind he still has a wife and kids – and just take something you rightfully earned." Adam waited for John to respond but when he didn't he cursed under his breath. Standing to his feet he said quietly, "I'm spending the night. I'll be sure to take the first flight back to Randy's in the morning."

John didn't say anything. He closed the laptop then shuffled the rest of the papers off of his bed and climbed in, lying awake for several hours until sleep overcame him.

***~X~***

Chris stared between the three men for a moment waiting for someone else to pitch in. When no one chose to speak again he shrugged and went back to Shawn. "So Shawn. You say the road to Survivor Series starts here. Can you give me a summary of events that took place?"

Shawn rolled his eyes. "More like a novel with many holes Chris." He clicked his tongue. "But now that we're all here, I supposed we can get some of those holes filled…that is, if everyone still plans on cooperating."

Bret looked over at Shawn rolling his eyes. "I said I would and I meant it. I got nothing else to hide since the biggest lie is already out in the open."

"You think so?" Hunter asked from the back of the room.

Bret rolled his eyes. "Not entertaining that one Hunter so Chris, please continue."

Chris blinked, looking over at Shawn who sighed. "Fine. I'll start. But let me recap for a moment. I won the big one from ego over here at Mania 12. It's debatable as to why exactly Vince finally gave me the push. Bret's story is that Vince wanted to give me a chance while my story is that Vince told me I was the guy." He shrugged. "At the time, I didn't so much know I was the guy. I knew in my heart that I was on Bret's level and since we were on again, off again lovers, I had no problem whatsoever throwing it in his face after winning it because after Mania, that's when things started getting bad anyway."

"Things were already bad Shawn," Hunter added. "They were bad before you won the belt because Bret seemed to think it wasn't his time to lose just yet."

Bret shrugged. "Fair enough. Maybe I didn't think it but if I was a low person, I'd kindly remind you that the ratings sucked ass when Shawn was champion." Shawn threw Bret the nastiest look he could muster, but Bret winced, holding up his hands. "Shawn, come on. We're all being honest here. The ratings were pretty bad."

"Yeah, maybe so Bret but you didn't stick around to carry the load again since Shawn couldn't handle it," Hunter added bitterly. "You ran with your tail between your legs and that's just sad man. You can give everyone the same story about Vince pushing your ass out the door but truth be told Bret, I'm inclined to believe Bischoff's story that you were meeting with him; plotting to leave anyway so I don't see what your problem is."

"My problem is you talking what you don't fucking know," Bret snapped.

Hunter laughed. "Then by all means Mr. King of Fucking Harts, enlighten us. Tell us all about that meeting with Bischy and how you have no one to blame but yourself for Montreal because you're a greedy, selfish bastard."

Bret jumped to his feet and started towards Hunter but Shawn was a step ahead of them both, quickly jumping to get between them. "Stop it! Just stop it right now Bret!"

"Why are you always taking this little shit's side?" Bret asked angrily. "It's just like you Shawn. To take up for the poison that ruined us to begin with!"

"Poison?" Hunter asked disbelievingly. "Oh…Bret that's real cute, calling me the fucking poison when clearly you were the poison from the start. Don't fuck a guy in the ass and declare your love for them if you're too chicken shit to be seen with him. Your homophobia and your lame excuses about family pride poisoned your relationship and that's why the two of you didn't make it! You were doomed from the start Bret, but this guy right here was too naïve and too stuck on you to realize it. He should have known the day after you fucked him in the ass that you were just like all the rest who came before and after you. You were a tool Bret, a bigger tool than I could ever hope to be and your family pride bit you in the ass at Montreal.

"I know we're not there yet," he continued, lowering his voice, "But I'm telling you how I feel before we get there; giving you the 411 because it's coming out today Bret. All of it's gonna come out and justice will be served because you were wrong. You were so wrong and if I were you, I don't think I'd have the guts to look in the mirror each day knowing that I let a man suffer for twelve fucking years over something that was just as much your fault as his." Hunter backed away slowly, never taking his eyes off Bret. He knew he'd just hit him with a low blow but it was the truth. Bret Hart was the key player in his own screwing and it was high time he swallowed that pill.

For a moment Shawn wondered whether or not Bret was gonna calm down but after several minutes of just standing there seething, he took a deep breath and went back to his seat. Shawn looked back at Hunter who promised he was done for now allowing him to take his seat again shaking his head. "I'm talking from this point on Chris." Chris nodded. "Alright so…my reign as champ wasn't exactly a good one. In fact, I only kept the belt a measly 4 months before I had to vacate it on Raw due to a knee injury. Now, I'm gonna hit the pause button here because I need to address the knee injury."

Shawn looked over at Bret waiting for him to say something smart but he didn't. Instead he just leaned over in his chair, elbows on his knees as he stared at the carpet. "You see Chris, at this point in my career, Bret and I were pretty much strangers. In fact, I believe we might have had sex—

"Made love."

Shawn rolled his eyes. "You make love to people you love. You didn't love me anymore Bret."

"Shawn," he said calmly, "We've already established that I still loved you. Always loved you. Always have and always will."

"Whatever. Anyway Chris, we made love, had sex, fucked—whatever you wanna call it. We did it maybe once or twice in those four months because I was busy. You might say Bret was busy too – and he was when he was champion. Like we said early on, we didn't have much time to be together and we couldn't exactly book a room together because then people would think that Bret was queer – couldn't have that," Shawn added bitterly.

"You say that as if you didn't know it would be that way," Bret said softly.

"I knew Bret and don't take it personally," Shawn answered. "I'm just saying…at the time…we were supposedly in love. You knew how I felt. You knew that I was tired of sneaking around and I just—fuck I'm not going there. To make a long story short Chris, we didn't have as much quality time and since I couldn't hang out with Bret, I spent a lot of time with Hunter."

"So—so I take it that's when you and Hunter kinda hooked up?"

Hunter shook his head. "Naa…and he'll tell you. Sean will tell you. Joanie will tell you. I didn't sleep with Shawn aside from the occasional spooning when he would complain about Bret or when he was hurting from his ring injuries. I loved him so much and yeah, you damn right I wanted a piece of him, but the few advances I made while Bret was still around all ended in vain because Shawn was loyal to Bret. That's the God's honest truth."

The room went quiet for a while, each man musing over their own feelings about each other, but Shawn didn't want to spend too much time thinking. "I'm sorry but we need to keep pushing." He took another deep breath before continuing quietly. "As a former champion yourself Chris, you know from experience the toll being the man takes on your body. I was wrestling at least five days a week plus doing talk shows, autograph sessions, commercials, PlayGirl – you name it. I was doing it. A typical HBK schedule in '96 was…I might wrestle a PPV in Atlanta Sunday, but I would then have to be at the next Raw in South Carolina the next night. So…I'd have my match against – let's say Davey Boy – in Atlanta. We'd go twenty to thirty five minutes and with my luchador style, I'd be running around and flying around none stop. The next night I'm at Raw, I might have to defend the belt again to match whatever WCW was doing so that meant yet another match only it might have a hardcore stipulation just to keep it interesting. Leave the show and immediately drive to the next city for a house show. We did house shows on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays. The Sundays that we didn't have PPVs, I was probably in a gym because I still had to look the part."

Chris shook his head. "I remember all too well those days and truth be told, it's not something you wanna go back to once you've had the experience."

"I know. Vince has been trying to get me to have a final run but I don't want it and I can't do Smackdown because of Bible Study. Anyway, you get the idea of how I was just running ragged and wearing my body out. Now you would think that since I was so busy, I'd take every opportunity I had of free time to recharge the batteries. Well…I wasn't so smart then…well, maybe I was but I didn't listen to my smarts. Instead of acting like a champion and carrying myself like one in public, I was rude, crude and a diva. I'd go party with Hunter and the guys after shows. We'd go into a bar and I'd just run wild. I'd flirt with loose women, but it was hard not to when they were all on me. I'd even flirt with some of the guys since they told me I was pretty – something I hardly heard from Bret those days since, you know, I wasn't good enough for him anymore."

"Shawn don't…," he began but Shawn continued on as if he didn't hear him.

"I was a pain in the butt Chris and Vince was constantly chewing my ass out. He would always get over it because he knew without me, he had no main event. I'm not being vain. These are just facts."

"I see," Chris nodded. "So by now, you were really feeling the strain of being a champ." Shawn nodded. "And that knee injury…is it safe to assume you weren't lying about it?"

Shawn nodded. "I wasn't kidding. My knees were killing me every night. They still hurt to this day but when Hunter and I play DX, he's always taking care of me after the matches. Vince tries not to work me so hard but I push myself. I want to be the example for these rookies. As a wrestler you're always going to be in pain. You just have to get used to it and push through it."

Chris nodded. "But did it never occur to you that you could be damaging your body for good? That you could…wind up in a wheel chair or something if you didn't slow down like so many who had come before you?"

"Yeah it did, but when you're champ and the rival company is kicking your ass, you're not allowed to dwell on those things. I was the top dog and everyone in that locker room may have hated me, but they also knew they needed me." He sighed. "But as luck would have it, I found out that not all of me is invincible and I had to vacate the belt. The whole 'I lost my smile' thing was probably true in more ways than my mom could ever know. I had little reason to smile those days. Being at the top was not all it's made out to be. From that point on, it was downhill from there."

Chris turned his attention to Bret. "So Bret, Shawn wasn't able to compete at Wrestlemania 13 so you and Steve kinda took his place. Its to my understanding that you were supposed to win the belt back from Shawn at this pay per view. Is that correct?"

Bret shrugged. "Yeah. Guess so. At the time I figured Shawn was pulling one of his little acts on Vince to keep from dropping the belt to me."

"And…you were once again, wrong," Shawn snided.

"Yeah well it's not like you didn't give me reason to suspect something like that. You were always throwing tantrums—

"So were you."

"I'm not…gonna argue with—Chris just—yeah I thought he was lying and yeah, if I choose to believe his story then maybe I was wrong—

"If you choose—where the hell do you get off—

"Shawn, you were a master at spinning tales—

"Whatever Bret," he mumbled. "You keep on deluding yourself from the facts while I keep dishing them. At the end of the day, the only thing that matters are the fans who will be watching this. Now if you're done I'd like to skip over the less important details and jump right into the final break up and Montreal…that is, if it's okay with you."

Bret scoffed. "As if you needed my permission."

"Well I don't know. I figured if I asked it would inflate your ego and distract you long enough where I could continue."

"You're just determined to push me away aren't you?"

"I thought I did that the night I told you I didn't love you anymore?" he sang.

Bret smirked. "Tantrum." He shook his head, leaning back in his chair. "Figures. I'll shut up now and let you finish."

"And let me finish…right." He nodded. "So yeah, let's just get to the point. Montreal. Oh boy. Am I excited!"

Hunter snickered from the back of the room earning a glare from Bret. "Don't give me that look Bret. It's not my fault you were a whiny baby. 'Oh Vince! Please don't replace me with that blonde bimbo! Hunter's corrupting him! He's not interested in helping the company! He's only interested in helping his little Kliq!'" Hunter mocked.

Bret shrugged. "And I still stand by all of that. Shawn, you may have wanted to help the company succeed. I won't take that from you but you were also interested in helping your friends."

"Which is totally different from looking out for my entire family," he said rolling his eyes. "Unlike you Bret, I didn't have a family. The Kliq acted as my family and like you wanted to protect Owen's interests, I had every right to want to protect Hunter's. I don't see much of a difference. Do you Hunter?"

H shook his head. "Nope."

"Shawn that's not fair," Bret replied. "I wasn't—

"Don't," Shawn warned. "Don't go there with me about politicking because we all did it. You, for that ginormous fucking contract that guaranteed you X amount of dollars while I, the fucking champion, was being paid considerably less. Please. Let's not go there."

"I was protecting—Vince was losing money and I did what any smart person would have done. I made sure that I was going to be taken care of."

"Which wasn't at all selfish since you were still having talks with Bischoff behind Vince's back," Hunter chimed in.

"No one asked you Big Nose and yeah, I met with Eric but Vince knew about those meetings. In fact he encouraged them."

"I don't believe you," Shawn replied.

"Yeah well you don't have to. Much like you don't have to believe that Vince was obsessed with you but he was. He treated you the way he used to treat me before you came along batting your pretty little eyelashes at him."

"Bret, you make it sound like Vince wanted to screw me."

"Well…"

Shawn shook his head in disbelief. "I can't believe you would go so far as to spin some kind of bogus tale…"

"It's not a tale Shawny. It's real talk. I'd be willing to bet my life Vince had dirty thoughts about you. Hell half the fucking locker room used to talk about you that way, but with Vince…he's a business man and would never exactly mix business with pleasure. Instead, he gave you everything you wanted and you know it."

"Bret, I didn't _always_ get my way."

"Yeah but most of the time you did and when you didn't feel like cooperating, he would find a way to convince you using his charm; a charm that used to get to me all the time too. Shawn…"

Bret turned to him holding his hand. "I know you love Vince like a father and so did I, but..I'm sorry. I've had 12 years to mull over this and I can't help but think he turned us against one another; that he used our relationship against us. Nothing else makes sense to me because…well yeah. Okay. So maybe I was making plans to leave for WCW but if my brother were alive today he'd tell you that I didn't really wanna go. I just—I was leaving because Vince thought it was the right thing to do and like you, I found it hard to go against him. I—he had me convinced that I was doing myself a favor and it didn't help that you and I were fighting all the time."

"And you couldn't tell me any of this before I decided to storm Vince's office after hearing the rumors?"

"Shawn you don't have to go there," Hunter spoke up, leering at Bret. "We haven't even gotten to Montreal yet and already he's trying to plant the seed that he's innocent. Well he's not about to put one over on all of you while I'm in the room," he growled. "Bret didn't tell you he was planning to leave and that was what led you to that meeting with McMahon and Pat."

"He and I technically weren't together Hunter, but of course you already know this since you went out of your way to make sure I knew he was done with me for good," Bret spat. "I did what I felt I had to do and if you don't like it then too fucking bad. I loved Shawn. At the time I fooled myself into thinking I didn't give a damn. I hardened my heart and listened to the rumors. I let the rumors of Shawn being an easy slut and a cock tease keep me focused on my goal, but that's not the entire reason I decided to leave and I did not make the decision as quick as you think I did."

"It—that doesn't matter," he snapped irritably. "You didn't tell me. I found out through everyone but you so what was I supposed to do? What was I supposed to think?"

"Shawn…baby you should have just come to me—

"Oh yeah right," he scoffed. "Come to you when you were too damn scared to speak to me in public? When we were all the time literally coming to blows each time we saw one another? When you couldn't even look at me anymore with love in your eyes; only rage that tore through me like a knife through the chest? Tell me how the hell was I supposed to come up to you and talk about it?"

"Yeah, but you didn't even try Shawn…," Bret began, sounding somewhat defeated but Shawn was beyond furious at this point.

"I didn't try? Are you _kidding_ me? How dare you say that to me! I was _always_ trying! Yeah maybe I was a bitch to you in public and in the ring, but you made it—God Bret I loved you so much and I felt like you didn't put the effort—why am I wasting my breath here?" He leaned back in his chair, shaking his head. Once again he felt an overwhelming desire to scream and cry. This was all too much. They weren't even at Montreal yet and already he could sense the confusion. So much happened in the days leading up to Montreal that the idea of having to relive them made him sick to his stomach.

Chris cleared his throat. "Alright. Shawn…Bret I'm still…a little confused right now so let me ask you both this. The week of Montreal…what happened? I need to hear it from both of you because the story I've heard is this. You Bret, met with Eric a final time and had already practically signed the papers. Vince handled your release and it was set in stone that you would be leaving immediately for WCW following Survivor Series. Is that correct?"

Bret nodded. "Yeah."

"Alright, so Shawn, I've heard so many stories surrounding your week of Montreal that I don't know who to believe. Vince and Pat say one thing, you say one thing, Hunter says one thing—too many stories—so all I ask is for your timeline. What exactly happened that led to your meeting with Vince about Montreal?"

Shawn remained eerily quiet for a moment as he let his mind wander back to that horrible week. After a while he spoke up quietly. "It started with the rumors of Bret's departure. For two months I kept hearing the rumors and two weeks before Montreal is when I stormed Vince's office. I was supposed to be winning the belt back—at least that's what I thought. He told me…" Shawn looked over at Bret who simply nodded, urging him to continue. He took a deep breath and began his story. "I was in the locker room…"

* * *

**AN: You guys I'm so sorry but I almost hit the delete button in this fic. I absolutely despise this story and have decided to quit trying to please everyone. The updates will come when I see fit. Love you all very much though xD**

- I'm not on anyone's side. However, I now know how the fic will end and I am happy with it. If you're a fan of the Harry Potter series, then expect a doozy of an epilogue.

- Been working on this chapter for 2 months. It may not seem like it but I have. This whole Montreal thing is mind blowing not to mention it took forever to work certain things back into the fic. The interview almost took over and I didn't want that yet.

- If you have questions, ask them in your review.

- In case you didn't know, I will NOT be writing anymore fics like this when I'm done. I don't have the heart to write wrestling fics anymore and since Shawn has retired, I have lost my inspiration to do so. Another thing, people tend to lose inspiration because of people not reviewing. Me personally...I don't give a damn about reviews because all of you have been following me for so long that I'm used to my regulars. You know who you are. BIG SHOUTOUT TO ESHA NAPOLEON! I love you!

- Anyway, a lot of fic writers get discouraged so please. If you're reading their fics be it straight smut or actual work like this, take the time to leave a review, even if it's just a quick 'I love it' or 'I hated it'. At least they won't feel bad.

- It's pretty pointless to beg me to put certain people together at the end. My decision is final.

- You might not like what's going on at this point but again, my theories and I'm sticking to them. I did the research. I put in the time to watch the vids. I did a hella lot with this fic so if you're pissy because H seems like a tool or that poor Bret's being treated badly or poor Shawn's crying too much, then I'm sorry.

- This chick is RETIRING from fic writing. Seriously. When I'm done I'm done. Just reminding you again. xD

- I think I'm turning into young Shawn. o.o It's really weird.

- Um...yeah I think that's all. Next update will be when my heart's in it.


	29. Session 11: The Road to Montreal Part II

_"Bret, buddy, pal o mine, if ya can't trust Shawn Michaels, who can you trust?" ~ HBK, taken from an episode of MNR before SummerSlam_

_"…and Hitman, the gentlemen down South who are not dinosaurs down there are my friends and they are gonna beat the hell outta ya one day whether you like it or not." ~ HBK, taken from the MNR following Montreal_

_"Look man, I just beat a man who's a legend in his own mind last night and ran him out of the WWF…" ~HBK, taken from the MNR following Montreal_

_"…by the way, how'd you know I was in that girly magazine? You couldn't help yourself could ya? You just had to flip through the pages a little bit didn't ya?" ~HBK to Bret, taken from an episode of MNR before Montreal_

_"…just because I choose to come out here and live my life openly and freely does not make you the better man Bret... See you like to put on a façade and in your mind you think that all of this is yours!" HBK to Bret, taken from a MNR before Montreal_

**~XX*RoadtoMontreal*XX~**

Shawn finished lacing up his boots then ran a comb through his hair pulling it back for the night. Hunter was standing nearby, a look of revulsion on his face as he stared across the room at the commotion. Bret and his brother Owen were chatting it up with a few of their buddies, every now and then breaking into rautious laughter that no doubt was geared towards them. Shawn looked up nudging Hunter in the side. "Hunt, let it go. Whatever it is, it's not worth it. As you can see, I am in a relatively good mood and I refuse to let that pink bastard or any of his buddies ruin it for me." Shawn cast his eyes across the room, meeting Bret's gaze briefly before quickly looking away to cup Hunter's cheek. He pressed a kiss to his forehead grinning. "DX is about to be the proud owner of one World Wrestling Federation Championship in two weeks so doncha think that's better than worrying about what's said about us?"

Hunter sighed, finally nodding his head. "Yeah. Guess you're right, but man if they haven't been working my nerves all night."

Shawn shrugged and went back to fussing over his hair. "Meh you know Bret. Always got to show who's boss. Hmph. I'll be running the show again in a few weeks so who cares what he thinks?"

The door of the locker room opened and closed again several times, men coming in to change while others left for the ring. They were joined minutes later by Joanie and Waltman who shot death glares at the Harts as they accidentally brushed by them on their way out.

"Perfect timing guys," Hunter grinned. "What a way to clear out the trash."

Joanie laughed and Pac made a face. "Yeah well they needed to fuck off anyway. I'm getting sick of that little group boasting about Bret keeping the belt after Survivor Series. Fucking prick."

Hunter shook his head. "Naa guys. Shawn's winning the belt at Survivor Series. Vince is gonna give him another chance and with all the rumors that Bret's planning to leave, you can't really blame the guy."

Joanie and Pac both shot each other knowing looks. Shawn caught this which made him frown. "What the fuck was that look all about?" he demanded. "What do you know that I obviously don't?"

"Uh...I shouldn't really be in here so I'm gonna…" Joanie quickly exited the locker room leaving Pac to be cornered by his two good friends.

"Well?" Hunter asked. "You heard the man. Have you heard something?"

Pac sighed. "Look guys, you know I don't know much of nothing. Shit, people talk all the time and you both know fucking well Bret's been saying he's leaving for months now."

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Yeah well Bret's just blowing hot air. He's really good at it too, but forget that," he said waving his hand dismissively. "What do you know about the pay per view? Did Vince change his mind? If he did then I swear to God he and I are about to go around the block. He fucking promised me that belt and I want it. Don't fucking promise me something for weeks then go back on it."

Pac winced. "Well…I don't really know Shawn. I know you guys tell me not to think much of rumors and shit, but fuck, it's hard not to when Jimmy's tellin' everyone that he's gonna buy everybody drinks in celebration of Bret's last night on Raw."

Shawn shrugged. "That's nothing to fret over Pac. Like I said, Bret's just blowing hot air and Jimmy's being a fucking ass, something his fat ass is good at." Shawn patted his shoulder. "Don't worry about it. The belt's coming back to DX and around my perfect waist where it belongs."

Pac still didn't look so sure so Hunter slapped his back. "Alright. Out with it. Why aren't you so sure about this? What? Did you hear Bret say so himself?"

Pac shook his head. "Not exactly. I just heard Bret telling Owen that Vince agreed to let him retain at the pay per view—Shawn don't—it could be a lie."

Shawn was now just standing there, his face no longer holding that cocky little smile Pac was used to. In fact, he looked almost cold as if he were glaring daggers through Pac. "Bret said…_what_ exactly?" he asked quietly.

Pac looked to Hunter for help but he too was watching Shawn waiting for the inevitable bomb that was about to explode. "He—he said—said Vince—but you know he could be lying."

Shawn acted as if he didn't hear Pac as he pushed past him and headed out the door. Hunter and Pac shot each other wary looks before running behind him, knowing that this would be bad should the rumor turn out to be true and in H's mind, he had a sick feeling it was, if only to keep Bret from leaving like the rumors suggested. Shawn pushed past all the people waiting outside Vince's door ignoring all the snide remarks he was getting. The door was locked and since he was in no mood to wait, he started pounding on it. "Vince, open this goddamned door or I swear to fucking God I'll walk out of here with _my_ European Championship around my waist and will never step foot in this dump again unless you grovel before me!" He pounded some more, most of the others in line backing off now knowing, or rather, assuming Vince would take insult to this. "Vince, I'm not fucking kidding! I need to see you now and if you don't open in the next second, I'm outta here—one half of your fucking main event walks!"

The door suddenly opened, a distraught Pat Patterson and tired McMahon standing just inside the room. "Shawn, for the love of God man, what in the world is wrong with you?" Pat asked. Pat was always fond of Shawn so he stepped aside allowing Shawn followed closely by Hunter and Pac to enter the office, closing the door behind them. "What's got your tights wound tighter than those britches you normally parade around in? You seemed just fine when I saw you last."

Vince plopped back down in the chair behind his desk, looking like he had not slept in ages. Shawn didn't care. He completely ignored Pat, marching right up to Vince's desk slamming the belt down. "So whose fucking belt does this belong to?" he asked.

Both Pat and Vince looked at each other and then to Hunter and Pac almost begging them to answer but even they looked confused.

"Come on Vin Man," Shawn continued, tapping his foot in annoyance. "Who does this fucking belong to?"

Vince rolled his eyes. "Is that a trick question?" Shawn looked as if he was ready to come across that desk at Vince who slowly stood to his feet, his voice low and calm as if pacifying Shawn. "Shawn, what are you asking? If you're truthfully asking about that belt then I'm pretty sure it belongs to you. After all, you're the super star that's wearing that prize right?"

Shawn rolled his eyes, snatching the belt off of the desk and holding it up. "So if Bret came in here and put on the same show, you'd tell him the same thing as well? That the WWE Championship belongs to him right?"

Vince sighed. "Shawn, what is this all about?"

"Just answer the fucking question alright!" he snapped. "Would you tell Bret the same fucking thing or not?"

Vince looked around the room, completely confused as to why Shawn was upset. He glanced at Hunter hoping he would give him some kind of explanation but he was too loyal to his friend to speak up so with a sigh, he shook his head. "No, I would not."

"And why wouldn't you Vince?" he asked quietly.

"Because you're my star," he answered soothingly. Pat moved to stand behind the angry young star, patting his back. "You're the guy," Vince continued, "who's going to be wearing the top prize around his waist in a couple of days."

"Then explain to me why the _fuck_ Bret's going around telling everyone that he's going to retain at Survivor Series? Did you promise him my belt and my spot? God help you if you did Vince. I swear to God I will leave outta here tonight, call Eric on the way out and meet with the rival comp that's kicking our ass each week all in the same breath and if you don't release me outta my contract I will embarrass you and this entire company on live TV in front of 8 million people so try me. At least if I leave, I can be with my friends."

Pat squeezed Shawn's shoulders moving to stand next to Vince who was now staring down at his desk as if he were lost. "I actually did tell Bret he could keep—

Shawn didn't wait for Vince to finish. He tossed his title to the side and started for the door. "Fuck this. I'm outta here."

"Shawn, let me explain! I have to explain or else you won't understand—I had no choice Shawn!" he shouted, almost pleadingly.

Shawn stopped at the door, whipping around glaring daggers at Vince, his eyes flashing dangerously. "You had no _choice_?" he asked, almost in disbelief. "Oh don't you _dare_ give me that bullshit! You're the fucking boss. The paycheck. The owner so how dare you fucking stand before me and tell me you had no choice! You're already paying that selfish bastard way more money than me or anyone else so why the fuck can't he accept that I'm better than him now and get the fuck outta my spot light? And why do you listen to his hot air? You know full well he's not gonna leave his brother and Davey for WCW. Bret's not exactly the risk taking type," he spat bitterly, thinking only of how his relationship with Bret was secret due to him being afraid of a gay label.

At this, Pac snorted. "So why'd you break your promise to me Vince?" Shawn continued, tapping his foot impatiently and staring at Vince coldly trying his best not to lunge at him for hurting him like this. "This hurts ya know. I've been…putting up with bullshit all year long but I smile and move on because I knew I would be back on my throne soon. This—I can't believe you'd do this to me but you know what?" He started backing away pointing his finger accusingly at Vince. "Fuck it. I don't need you. I don't need this company and I sure as hell don't need to be around Hart. I'm calling Eric tonight because I got more talent than both your rosters combined so fuck you." He looked over at Pat. "And fuck you Mr. I'm-Always-On-Your-Side-Shawn," he mocked.

He pushed past Hunter once again damn near sprinting for the door until Vince spoke up quietly. "He already signed the contract. Bret's last night is Survivor Series."

Shawn paused, his face hidden so no one could really see what he was thinking. "You lie." Hunter reached out to touch Shawn but he shook him off, whipping around to glare at Vince. "Bret's not leaving. You're just trying to justify going back on your word but I know Bret better than you think and I say he's full of shit."

Both Pat and Vince shook their heads. "I'm not kidding Shawn. Bret's last night is the pay per view and starting the Monday after he officially belongs to Eric Bischoff. The only problem is that he doesn't want to put you over. He wants to win his last match in his home country then vacate the belt the next night on Raw. I don't agree with this since traditionally, if you're on your way out you're supposed to do the job but he refuses to compete unless he can retain." Vince slumped back down in his chair. "I'm sorry but there's nothing I can do."

Shawn remained quiet as he stood there staring at the floor, no doubt fuming on the inside. Unable to take the uncomfortable silence anymore, Hunter spoke up. "Vince, I can't help but notice how you sorta gave into Bret's demands. I mean, don't get me wrong. He's a top star and ya gotta do what's right for business, but you had to know Shawn was going to be pissed at this. Seems to me like you don't care all that much for him if you're sweeping him under the rug for Hart."

Vince shook his head. "No…it's not like that Hunter and I'm not really planning on letting Bret keep that belt either. I just figured Shawn was the most loyal of the two; that I could count on him to stick around no matter what because he's always been one of my most dedicated stars and the best at what he does." Vince watched Shawn as he spoke hoping that his words were sinking in and that he was finally understanding the situation. Bret didn't want to listen and Vince was only too eager to find a way to make him listen; to do what's right for all parties involved.

"I need a moment," Shawn said quietly as he turned to leave. With each step he took down the hall, the hushed whispers became greater in number, pissing him off even more so that by the time he got to the locker room, he was more than ready to tear into somebody. He burst through the door and as expected the room grew eerily quiet, which was just what he wanted anyway. Some of the guys could tell just by the look on his face that there was about to be drama so most of them gathered their things to finish dressing elsewhere. Only Bret and Mark stayed behind, each one sitting quietly on opposite sides of the room doing their own thing and completely ignoring his presence.

Shawn clicked his tongue. He didn't appreciate being ignored and he was about to have Hart's undivided attention for he needed answers. He grabbed one of the steel chairs folding it up and with a smirk he tossed it across the room, the chair almost taking Bret's head clean off. Mark looked up but merely shrugged and resumed his reading while Bret quickly jumped to his feet, his face contorted with rage. "What the _hell_ is your problem? You could have taken me out!"

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Oh I doubt that Bret. Gonna take something a little bigger than a steel chair to bring that head of yours down to size."

"You're crazy."

"And you're selfish," he shot back. "So don't you have something you wanna tell me?"

Bret shrugged. "Not really."

"Tch. So that's how it is now?"

"Should it be any other way?" he asked, a slight hint of challenge in his voice. "We broke up so the way I see it, I don't have to tell you much of anything slut."

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Still letting those rumors cloud that big head of yours but whatever. I'm just saying It would have been nice if you'd have clued your fuck buddy in on your future plans but I guess that's asking too much of a partner."

"Now you look here," Bret growled. "You and I are _nothing_."

"Oh for the love of Christ—cut the fucking act!" he screamed. "Mark's not stupid. In fact I'm pretty sure more than half the roster knows just what you are and you're just too stupid to realize it."

Bret got right in his face. "Oh and what am I? Certainly not like you."

"And here we go again…" Shawn turned away from his crossing his arms. "Why do I even bother with you? It was pretty obvious after our trip to the UK that you would never be what I wanted and yet here I am, legit trying in my own fucking way to make some sense out of all of this but I guess Hunter was right. I'm too stupid and I'm a glutton for punishment."

"Hunter," Bret said quietly. "Always that big nosed bastard and just another reason to leave without ever looking back."

Shawn turned to face him, his face expressionless as he fought the urge to just lunge at Bret and pound him to the floor for being such a heartless dick right now. "So since you're leaving, don't you think it's only right you put me over? After all, I _am_ a bigger star than you right now so it's only right you do the job."

Bret frowned. "Sorry, but I'm not losing in my home country, especially to you, my biggest rival."

"So if the shoe was on the other foot, you wouldn't say shit about me refusing to put you over right?"

Bret shrugged. "Probably not. Can't make any promises since you're not exactly the easiest person to get along with."

"Oh and you are? Mr. Lord God Almighty. Everything has to be the Hitman's way or no way at all right?"

"Exactly," he smirked.

"You know what? I've had it with you. Fuck you. I hope you're happy on the other side of the fence and you know what else?" He got right in Bret's face smirking. "I can't _wait_ to kick your ass every night in the ratings because I am better than you. Always have been , always will be and it eats you up inside knowing that the guy you see as just a piece of ass fairy boy that you can poke every now and then is the one McMahon chose to sit upon the throne as champ and not you, Mr. Dried Up Hitman with nowhere else to go, but me," laughs coldly, "the only place I've got to go is up. The sky's the limit for me." Shawn poked at his belt. "Best you hang onto that while you can. You never know what could happen between now and Montreal."

"_Nothing's_…going to happen between now and Montreal. I'm going to kick your scrawny ass like I did in Anaheim, retain _my_ WWE Championship, and go on to better things while you're stuck here with your new boyfriend struggling to keep ratings up."

"He's not my boyfriend!" he snapped irritably. "And if that's why you're leaving then you're stupid. I would—do you really think that less of me Bret? That I would allow a guy I hardly even know…" He was hurting and it was taking everything he had not to cry. Why couldn't Bret see that it was still the same despite their time apart?

Bret ran a hand through his hair staring down at the floor. "It's not like you make it easy for me Shawn." He sighed. "I don't know what—I didn't know what to think anymore and since you're always so busy with your new friends, I took the liberty of making sure me and my family were gonna be alright and to be honest Shawn, we're just fooling ourselves."

"Fooling ourselves?" He scoffed. "Oh that's real cute Bret. Tell me something. Were we fooling ourselves the other night when I was clinging to you as you screwed me through the mattress? Oh wait. Were we fooling ourselves the next morning during our normal ritual in the shower? Or when I was on my knees for you later that day? Don't..." He held up his hand scowling. "Don't fucking give me that excuse because if a part of you didn't still want this to work, you wouldn't be fucking me every chance you get."

"None of that exactly matters anymore Shawn," he answered quietly. "What's done is done. It's too late now. I've made up my mind and if I mean that much to you, you'd put your ego aside for one night. You'd prove that you're not just putting on another one of your acts after a tantrum and show me that you mean it."

"Wha—are you fucking kidding me?" he stammered. "Oh God!" He ran a hand through his hair, closing his eyes and taking deep breaths trying to make some sense of all of this but this was too much. He suddenly threw himself at Bret tackling him to the floor. "I can't believe you—bastard!" He punched him hard in the jaw only for him to flip them over attempting to restrain him, but he was kicking and thrashing too wildly out of anger to be stopped just yet.

"Shawn! Get a fucking grip!"

Shawn landed another in his face, tears streaming down his own as he screamed loudly. "Bastard! I hate you! You son-of-a-bitch! Selfish…I loved you and this is how you dump me? Fuck you…hate you!"

Bret scrambled to his feet with Shawn quickly following lunging at him again only to be grabbed by the waist and slammed against the opposite wall. He grabbed him by the neck, squeezing just hard enough to shut him up, a knee placed between his legs to keep him from kicking. "Stop it," Mark growled. "That's enough. You two are disturbing my reading and unless you both want to end up on the other end of my boot, you'll settle down and talk things out like men."

Mark looked over his shoulder at Bret frowning. "It's pretty clear to me you don't want this go no farther than this room and I'll respect that since you've never bothered me, but I'm gonna throw my two cents in and be gone. You're both two fucked up individuals that probably should have never hooked up to begin with for several reasons I'm sure you've gone over in your minds when ya lay in bed alone at night." Mark turned back to Shawn slowly loosening his grip on the crying blonde. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I apologize. It'll never happen again." He backed away from them both, grabbed his book and left the room leaving the two lovers alone.

It was quiet for a long time, the silence in the room almost drowning the two individuals as they swam in a pool of their own thoughts. Bret turned away from Shawn, probably not liking the tears while Shawn continued to stare off into space as if dead to the world. After a while, he wiped his eyes and walked to the door. "Aren't you going to say something?" he asked quietly, masking the hurt and anger with a monotone voice.

Bret threw up his hands. "Fuck Shawn, what do you want me to say? We screw around and make empty promises to one another all the time knowing full well we're only fooling ourselves. After last time—after tonight—I don't think…" He shook his head. "Aren't you tired of this? I'm leaving. It's—the deal is done and since we can't be together anyway, we might as well quit while we're ahead."

"Thank you Bret. That's all I needed to know." He walked out of the locker room, wiping his eyes as he hurried up the hall. By now everyone was either leaving, getting ready to go on, or too occupied with scripts to even care what Shawn was up to. The line in front of Vince's office was gone so he took it upon himself to walk on in without knocking, both Hunter and Pac still sitting inside with solemn expressions on their faces. Hunter jumped to his feet and grabbed Shawn, throwing his arms around him, but Shawn gently pushed him away. "I'm fine." He turned to Vince who was still sitting behind his desk, his face strained with worry. He walked up to the desk chewing his lip for a moment he said quietly, "I'll do whatever you want me to do."

Vince looked over at Pat wondering if Shawn was volunteering to do what he was hoping he would do all along. "Shawn…sweetie what _exactly_ are you saying?"

Hunter smirked as he moved to stand beside Shawn, putting an arm around him. "He's saying Vince, that if Bret won't do business then we'll do business for him."

"Is…that right?" Pat asked, looking at Shawn for confirmation.

He nodded his head, wiping his eyes again. "Yeah. That's exactly what I'm saying. I—I want my belt. I want my belt in Montreal."

Vince leaned across the desk, a small smile on his face. "Gentlemen, let's talk."

**~XX*xx*XX~**

"We sent Pac away because we didn't want him involved," Shawn continued. "He looked pretty uncomfortable but Hunter's a soldier. He stayed with me promising Pat, whose biggest concern was for my safety, that nothing would happen to me that day. He wanted to be ringside for it all but I believe Vince shot it down initially thinking the Hart's would suspect something."

"And he was right," Bret added, sounding somewhat bitter. "Your threat about holding onto the belt didn't phase me at all but days after that last break up, people started talking of a swerve. I don't know if your boy Pac told it, but in the back of my mind I couldn't help but wonder if Vince would keep his word." Bret looked over at Shawn. "I just never suspected you'd be involved considering what we had no matter how bad it ended."

Shawn rolled his eyes. "Well I'm sorry I disappointed you Bret. You didn't love me anymore and you planned to leave me, without fucking telling me yet I was supposed to do the honorable thing and just let you have your way right?" Shawn scoffed. "Sorry, but I don't think so. You hurt my feelings that day. I'm pretty sure when you looked me in the eye and said that we were nothing, my heart shattered."

"Yeah but Shawn, we had broken up. You—we had a literal fight the time before—

"Oh please," Hunter jumped in, growling at Bret. "You two fought all the time and then he'd come running into my arms. The next thing I know, he's lying in your bed and all is hunky fucking dory again so don't," Hunter said, waving his hand. "You're so full of shit you're starting to stink up the place."

Bret jumped to his feet. "Fuck I'm about tired of your fucking mouth! If there was one person I could have hit that day, it's you. God I wished I could have hit you instead of threatening to hit Shawn but your chicken shit ass was somewhere hiding!"

"Hiding!" Hunter sputtered. "You've gotta be joking! Hiding from you? Yeah right."

Chris winced. He didn't want another fight to jump off even though he was pretty sure that it was inevitable at this point. "Hey, guys. Come on. Let's…let's hurry this up since I know you all are ready to get the hell out of this stuffy room."

Bret sat back down, now seething at Hunter tapping his foot impatiently. "You know what? Before we jump into the actual event, Id just like to point out that things mighta turned out differently had Shawn come directly to me after he heard the rumors."

"We've already been over this Bret!" Shawn snapped. "You didn't want to be seen with me in public and it's as you said, we were nothing so moot point."

"No—wait. Shawn, before you finally decided to ask Vince about it, you were right," he said, clutching Shawn's hand loosely. "I was just blowing hot air. I—I was undecided for a long time but the night you came to me, it was already too late and…before…when I first started the negotiations, I wanted you to come with me, but then I let my family talk me out of it. They said to me, 'What's the point of leaving to start fresh and you're taking the problem with you?' I couldn't argue with that logic and since you and I quit speaking for almost 2 months, I assumed…I figured we were really done this time, but now I see…that night you punched me…you were trying…"

Bret's voice trailed off and he stared down at the floor. The more they talked, the more it looked like just one big old misunderstanding and bad timings that created a mess that never should have happened to begin with. In fact, it was bad enough now that a part of him didn't want to continue for fear of what else he might find out.

Chris cleared his throat. "So where do we go from here?" he asked quietly. "Bret, do you want to pick up from here?"

Bret shook his head. "I can't. It's all Shawn from this point on. I'll just throw in my two cents when and where it's needed. You won't need me until after it actually happens."

Chris looked to Shawn. "You want to continue picking up after the big meeting with Vince?"

Shawn shook his head. "No. I'll just jump right into it. For the next two weeks I made Bret's life a living hell but it didn't come without a price. I had too many enemies and they were only too happy to let it be known. I would come back from a shoot and my locker room would be trashed. Or…several times I was jumped in the back when the rest of DX wasn't around and I can remember this one night… I was in the middle of a shoot and someone jumped me from behind but Arn and Pat pulled them off of me. This is live TV and I looked at the camera—I was so frustrated—and I just started screaming how much longer is this shit gonna go on? By now I'd had it with the whole Bret-Shawn rivalry. For two years Bret and I were at it onscreen but it didn't help that we were at it off screen too."

Shawn went quiet for a while and Chris couldn't help but notice the strain in his face and how he looked so exhausted all of a sudden. Chris wanted to call the whole thing off. He'd heard enough to know that this was all a big misunderstanding to begin with but he wasn't sure they'd want to. They'd come so far—it would be sin not to finish it now. He glanced over at Bret who looked just as weary while Hunter just looked plum out of it. Chris wasn't going to urge either man to continue so instead he leaned back in his chair, waiting for one of them to start talking again at their convenience.

Through the silence Bret couldn't bear to look at Shawn. All of these years he believed so many things, but they were the wrong things and now he felt like a fool. On the other hand, a part of him still felt rage and discontent. Shawn didn't have to agree to it. Shawn could have… _Look at me…Trying to blame him all over again when it was McMahon that rang the bell._ Bret found it in himself to look over at Shawn whose face was blanketed by his hair. He was leaning forward in his chair staring down the floor, apparently feeling the same sick feeling they both felt on that day. Bret looked away, realizing that they only had a bit more to get through and it would be over so he forced himself to keep talking.

"It…The days leading up to Montreal were hectic for me," he said softly. "I was filming my documentary 'Wrestling With Shadows' so I had cameras following me around. I don't think Vince was aware that the crew would be at the pay per view and I'm sure once he found out, he shit bricks, but obviously not enough to go back to the original finish."

"If you don't mind my asking," Chris started, "what exactly was the original finish?"

"Well…" Bret started but Shawn cut him off quietly.

"We're not even sure anymore," Shawn answered. "What you all don't know is that Vince went over several finishes with me days before the pay per view. By the time Survivor Series was upon us, I had no clue how the match would go. That day…that day in Montreal was a day unlike any other. Not because of what went down but because…" He paused. "The day started off so differently. There were signs…like you just _knew_ something was going down but I had to eat it and act like all was well. The ironic thing about that day is that Bret and I talked. We had a long, cordial conversation about the match and came up with a finish. I'm gonna take a moment here just to point out that what separates good from greatness is the ability to call a match. These days, the guys get scripts and they go over the match sequence by sequence before ever stepping foot in the ring but Bret and I never did that. He would always, as ring general, call a great match often times deviating to do things I wanted to do. The only reason we went over that match this particular day is because it was a weird day and again, no match ending had been set in stone."

Bret nodded, his heart skipping just a little at Shawn's sincere praise of him, something he never thought he'd hear again. "Yeah. I think…the original ending Vince pitched to me is a DQ. By now you all know I didn't want to drop the belt in my country so I told Vince we needed something besides Shawn pinning me for the three count. I think the idea was to have DX interfere to save Shawn from tapping to the sharpshooter then Owen and Davey would come out to even the score, but my understanding of it was that Vince called Shawn about that ending and he didn't like it."

Shawn nodded. "No, I didn't like it because it didn't make sense. You were leaving so how would that ending put the final stamp on our rivalry so to speak? I didn't like it but I never told him I wouldn't deal with it. He called me and asked so I gave him an honest opinion."

"So what did Vince say when you told him you didn't like it?" Chris asked.

Shawn finally sat up, leaning back in his chair again still tense all over. "I—I don't really remember. Something about we're never gonna get the belt on you if we don't find a better ending so I told him that if they couldn't come up with one then I'll put Bret over and whatever. That would be the end of it. Did I _want_ to put Bret over? Hell no. Not at all because he was leaving so again, how much sense would that make? However, I told Vince—and I gave him my word—I'd do anything he wanted me to do even if I didn't like it."

"Did you like the idea of screwing Bret over?" Chris asked. For a long time Shawn remained silent thinking of his answer.

"Honestly, no," he finally admitted. "I didn't really—in my heart—want to screw Bret over but at the time, it seemed like he left Vince no choice and since I was still fuming over our last fight, I was only too happy to prove Bret wrong. I wanted that belt just to wear it in front of him and show him that not everything is gonna go the Hitman's way especially on his way out the door. I wanted another way, but the way Vince talked the screwjob was the only option we had so I went with it."

Chris nodded. "Alright. That sounds fair so now Bret, before Shawn continues with the story, I got to know. Did others suspect something was going down that day? How was the rest of the roster leading up to Montreal?"

Bret shook his head. "It was bad. Like, everyone knew Shawn and I were at odds off screen. They knew that in their eyes, we couldn't stand the ground the other walked on which was probably true most days that year, but deep down I still cared for Shawn—loved him even—but I was young. I figured something better would come along so after that final break up with Shawn, I kept my head in the game by focusing on my documentary and doing shoot style interviews to hype the pay per view. But between all of that, guys like Vader and few others that were pretty cool with me, kept asking me did I suspect something was gonna go down. Apparently they saw Shawn's outburst at Vince about the belt and figured since Shawn was probably going to be the man once I was out of the picture that Vince would find a way to screw me over. At first I laughed about it. Ya know, Vince was always a man of his word so I didn't think nothing of it. But then even Davey was starting to agree with the guys. Too many people said they saw Shawn talking with Vince and Pat a lot so they kept coming to me, telling me not to let Shawn put me in any kind of holds. After a while it got to me and then that's when I started feeling uneasy about the whole thing. I got a feeling, you know, that something wouldn't go as planned which is why I made it my business to see Shawn before the match to make sure I knew exactly how we would end it."

Shawn suddenly stood to his feet, the overwhelming tension in the air making it hard to breath now. "I need a break," he said as he headed out the door. Bret watched him leave, resisting the urge to go after him but secretly thanking God for the moment's reprieve. His chest was starting to hurt as well as his head. He was tense all over and already he could see that awful day beginning to play in his head. Needing a distraction, Bret pulled out his cell phone. He was gonna play a few games until Shawn was ready to continue but he had several missed calls and a new voice mail. He scrolled through the missed calls, blinking in disbelief at a number he hadn't seen since the call about his Hall of Fame induction. _McMahon…why would he be calling me?_ He stood to his feet and left as well assuring Chris he would be back shortly. He passed Shawn in the hall but did not attempt to console him for fear of getting his head chopped off. Instead he turned a corner and dialed his voice mail. Sure enough it was McMahon speaking and he wasn't sure how he felt about it.

_Bret, it's Vince. Give me a call when you get some time. I was doing some thinking today and I feel like it's time we talked so…think it over. I want to make you an offer, one I hope you'd like as sort of a peace offering since I don't think we quite reached that point after your Hall of Fame induction. Hope to hear from you soon._

Bret just held the phone for several seconds looking confused. Why now Vince? Why now he wondered. He would have to wait and find out later. He could hear Hunter out in the hall coaxing Shawn back into room which meant it was time to finish this once and for all. All the rumors, all the lies—everything—was about to be out in the open. He just prayed that when it was all over, they could mend what was broken so many years ago.

* * *

**AN: You guys should know me by now. This fic gets updated when I take the notion or when inspiration hits. The young Shawn that lives in my head started screaming his head off one night so here ya go. Now for things you need to know:**

- I am NOT trying to make Shawn look good. On the other hand, this is what I think happened - minus the slash - coming up to Montreal and all of my writing is based on FACTS that you can get if you read their books, YouTube a few promos, and watch their DVDs.

- I think Bret's onto something about Vince turning them against one another. It was no secret that Bret and Shawn, real life rivals, hated each other so it made perfect sense to have Shawn wrestle Bret at Survivor Series. Think about it.

- FACT: Just about everything you read in this chapter are facts; facts that came directly from shoot interviews, especially the last interview portion of it. I quoted Hunter quite possibly word for word from Heartbreak & Triumph and Shawn word for word from a combination of shoot and his DVD.

- If Bret is looking like the bad guy here, it's unintentional. That just means you're starting to see something other than his side of the story you've gotten for years.

- The quotes at the beginning of the chapter were some that made me laugh. HBK had a big mouth...xD

**Preview of the next chapter:**

_"...he told me to whatever you do, deny it. If Bret asks...anyone asks, deny it. You know nothing...Vince wanted the blame all on him..." ~ HBK_


	30. Conversation with the Deadman

John did not sleep very well for the remainder of the night. In fact, he just sort of lay in bed listening as Adam breathed softly on the other side of the room, no doubt exhausted from his flight. John's eyes roamed the cabin until they finally landed on his wallet which was sitting in plain view on his nightstand. He picked it up, flipping it open smiling down at the photograph of himself and Shawn taken after they'd gone fishing together for the first time. John was wearing a scowl as Shawn kissed his cheek. Both men were drenched from head to toe and covered in a fishy smell. John laughed now but at the time, he did not think it was so funny that the boat toppled over due to his pushy boyfriend misbehaving. Adam had only been too kind to snap a picture and some time after, found himself being tossed in the lake by an irate John.

He closed the wallet placing it back on his stand then sighed. Adam was right. He did want his kitten back but that was easier said than done. The way Adam come riding in here on his white horse with his voice of reason—it all sounded good but John knew better. Who's to say that Shawn would even talk to him now let alone just let them pick up where they left off? Sure it's only been a couple of days since he left him, but that didn't mean everything was going to be the same. He wouldn't be surprised if Shawn was epically ill with him and rightfully so. He walked out on him without giving Shawn the opportunity to make up his mind. He just assumed that Bret would win him over and for that, he wasn't sure what his kitten would think. He spent weeks preaching to his lover about staying strong and here he was running for the hills like a coward too afraid to face his destiny. What kind of man had he become?

Signs of morning crept through the blinds alerting John that he stayed up all night. It wasn't anything relatively knew. Hell if Adam hadn't showed up, he would be asleep in his chair cursing upon his stirring about having fallen asleep over important documents. He laid there for a while longer then decided it was time to get up. He quietly crossed the room gathering things for a shower emerging from the restroom an hour later half dressed in some black slacks, a towel around his neck. Adam was still sleeping soundly but John was used to rising early. If Adam was gonna stay at camp Layfield he had to obey the rules.

John stood over Adam with a smirk before smacking him hard behind the head. "Wake up tiger. Rise and shine. It's time to wine, dine, and get a move on."

Adam jerked awake, his heart racing as he looked around the room wildly. Slowing the looming figure became clearer and he retaliated by tossing a pillow at him which missed by miles. "Fuck you Layfield! My plane doesn't come for another…" He glanced at the clock on the mantle scowling. "Fuck you John. It's too early. Why you up? Live a little and go back to fucking bed."

John moved away from the bed to stand in the mirror. "Ahh well you lay there all you want hot shot but i'm leaving today." He finished drying his hair with a towel then reached for his hair drier to style it in its usual Layfield manner.

Addy just stared at him for a while, wide eyed and confused. "Why are you leaving?" he asked after a while. "I thought you had too much work to do or…" he smirked, "is it because a sexy blonde named Addy got to ya last night?"

John finished buttoning up his shirt then reached for his tie. "Well, I don't know about this Adam person but a sexy blonde did get to me last night—all night if I'm gonna be honest." John looked back at Adam who was slowly dragging his ass out of bed finally. "You were right. I do want him back but I'm afraid it's a lost cause. He loves Bret and I don't think that's ever gonna change. Me leaving him alone with Bret was either the best idea or the worst idea I've ever had in my entire perfect life."

He turned back to the mirror working on fixing his tie but his stomach hurt and he was starting to dread the ride back to Texas. He felt Adam's hand squeeze his shoulder a bit, his own way of letting John know that maybe it'll all be better and work itself out but did he wait too late? _Guess I'll know when I see him again…if I see him again at all…_

**x-x-x**

All day Jeff lounged around on the porch with Matty musing over his current situation and ignoring his brother's random hints that all seemed to scream "I told you so." But Jeff didn't care and little did Matt know it only made Jeff want Hunter that much more. Several times he thought about picking up the phone to call him but for what? What would he say? He certainly didn't feel the need to apologize for leaving. Hunter deserved it and possibly a whole lot more for having the nerve to scream out another man's name. That's one of the worst things any person could do to their lover; calling out another person's name which usually meant you're not the one they really want. Sometimes there wasn't a doubt in Jeff's mind that Hunter wanted him but lately…he couldn't be sure. When Shawn was involved nothing was ever what it seemed.

After sulking and musing over this for what seemed like hours, Jeff finally decided to pick up the phone and call Hunter. As expected, all he got was his voice mail but that was alright. He didn't really want to talk to Hunter anyway…or so he told himself. He slammed his phone shut and after contemplating for a bit, he turned his ringer off, returned to his room and went back to bed crying himself to sleep.

**x-x-x**

Mark was glad to have his Rockstar back with him, if only for a few days since he had to be back for Smackdown tapings whereas he still had a few weeks before his resting period was up. They stayed in bed most of the morning and that afternoon, they took a long ass shower together then John went out to grab them some food. He came back with lots of Chinese take out setting it down in front of Mark, who was sprawled out on the couch in his underwear. "Kid you buy the Chinese out?" he asked smirking a bit.

John sat down next to him, a slight frown on his face. "You know I'm a growing boy so I gotta eat." He shook his head mumbling something under his breath as he started going through the boxes of food.

Mark easily picked up on his mood, sensing something was wrong. "John baby, tell me what's on your mind. What's that frown all about?"

John passed a box to Mark shrugging. "It's no big deal really. I just wanted to check up on Jeff and all but he's not answering his phone. In fact, he hasn't answered in almost two days and I'm starting to worry about the guy. You know how he is Mark. The slightest thing can set him off and I don't want him doing shit he ain't got no business doing."

Mark grabbed a fork adding, "Like drinking or that other stuff right?"

"Exactly." John sighed. "Only thing I can think of is a possible fallout between him and Hunter. Jeff was already annoyed with him the other night on the plane when H wasn't answering his phone. He just knew Hunter was somewhere with Shawn."

Mark got up to grab a few drinks out the fridge. "Yeah well I don't doubt Hunter was somewhere with Shawn. If Shawn's in danger, H is gonna be there like a white knight."

John frowned. "But—and maybe I'm wrong—but wouldn't it be best if Hunter stayed out of it this time? Jeff's already paranoid and Hunter knows that it's a risk getting involved considering what happened a few months ago. Don't you reckon they need to sit this one out?"

Mark resumed his seat on the couch nodding in agreement. "I've known Shawn and Bret a lot longer than any of those guys. The shit that went down years ago prior to and after Montreal was serious business. I can't really fault John for pushing Shawn to do the interview. With Heartbreaker's new faith and all I'm sure a part of him has always wanted to bury the hatchet. Montreal, despite all the versions you've heard, the entire blame went to Shawn even though in hindsight he was merely a middleman—the guy who pulled trigger so to speak."

"I get that," John replied. "Even if you just listen to the stuff that's already out there, Vince is the one who told the people to ring the bell so I've never understood why Bret got so angry at Shawn…" He frowned. "Until…now I guess. It makes more sense if they were lovers." John looked over at Mark, popping the top of his drink. "So what you think? Maybe Bret felt betrayed or something?"

Mark sighed. "Kid, those two had many issues and to be honest I've always felt they were bad for one another. Just cause you love someone don't mean you're right for one another. Maybe in today's world they could create a happily ever after but back then, they were doomed from the start. You know I got a lot of respect for Bret. Never had a problem with him and he carried himself like a true champ so my opinions are not based off a disliking of him or Shawn for that matter."

John took a bite of his eggroll and after a while he nudged Mark grinning. "Yeah but you and I both know you had a thing for Shawn once. Come on. Call my bluff."

Mark sipped on his drink. "Mn…well I can't explain my feelings for Shawn. I never had a problem with him either. He and I were cordial, always clicked in the ring and he was always willing to take my advice and push both of us to the limit. If he annoyed me, I got onto him and he'd shut up. Not sure if its cuz I scared him or if its cuz he respected me. I'd like to think it was more out of respect than anything, but I can't speak for him."

John nodded. "I see so back to Bret…betrayed or something else?"

Mark leaned back on the couch smirking at John. "You're not gonna let this go are you?"

John shrugged. "I mean, I could drop it if ya don't wanna talk about it. It's just the whole BHBK thing is a hot topic these days and you know, I'd just like to understand it a bit better. Jeff's prolly hauled up in a room somewhere smoking a joint, Hunter's probably torn between Jeff and Shawn while Chris is somewhere popping Prozac's to keep from going crazy like everyone else seems to be doing. You're the only one who's all chill about it all." John set his can down and scooted closer to Mark on the couch. "You don't have to talk about it Marky. I was just…being curious is all."

Mark put his arm around John kissing the top of his head. "You know kid, your methods of persuasion are second to none." He rubbed John's arms thinking back to days when he would sit and "read" taking it all in; all of the fights, gossip—everything. He was pretty much ignored backstage but that's because he kept to himself and in turn most guys respected him enough to stay out of his way. He was a guy of few words and was the type of guy to sit and observe rather than participate in the gossip. He found out very quickly you learned a lot more by doing just that and boy did he have plenty of stories he could share if he was the kind of guy to tell other people's business. Still, his Rockstar was a good guy and in many ways reminded him of Shawn minus all the baggage he had back in the day. Secretly, he was just like anyone else who got to know Shawn. He was a sexy young blonde and on a good day, you'd fall for his smile or his ability to make you laugh from his goofiness. On a bad day though…well…

"Mark? You okay?" John asked quietly.

Mark smiled. "Yeah I'm good Rockstar. Just was thinking about answering your questions. Bret…well I know he felt betrayed. In his eyes he felt like since Shawn supposedly loved him that he should not have agreed to something as low as the Screw Job."

"How do you feel about it Mark? Be honest. Do you think maybe Shawn should have said no?"

Mark sighed. "That's why this issue will stand the test of time. It's hard to say whether or not Shawn should have done what he did. You see, I bet you anything Shawn probably didn't care one way or the other since he felt betrayed as well. Shawn most likely felt that Bret's leaving for WCW without talking to him about it first was a slap in the face and back then, Shawn was quick tempered and hot headed. That being said, when Vince presented the idea of possibly getting back at Bret he was all over it. Then there's Bret, who felt Shawn betrayed him by actually going through with it and Vince, who felt like Bret was backing him in a corner. That chick—I forget her name—maybe it was Medusa. Anyway, she carried the Women's Championship to WCW and dropped it in a bin on live TV embarrassing Vince and while Bret was pretty loyal to him, it was no secret that Bret was starting to resent Vince for turning his back on him in favor of Shawn."

Mark grabbed John pulling him into his lap holding him close. John smiled planting a kiss on Mark's lips. "I'm glad you and I aren't one big mess."

Mark smacked his bottom grinning. "You know me. I'm a simple guy and it don't take much to make me happy. I just want somebody I can talk to, have a beer with, cuddle with since I'm a big teddy bear, peace of mind—which you give me…" He pecked John's lips. "What more do I need?"

John slid his hands over Mark's chest. "Maybe the occasional great sexings, which I am more than happy to help with."

"Mmhmm…I bet you are." He pushed John down on his back smiling down at him. "Forget about the BHBK drama. Let's make drama of our own, but the good kind."

John wrapped his legs around Mark grinning. "I'm all for that."

**x-x-x**

Bret put his phone away and went back into the room closing the door behind him. Already the room was filled with tension despite the short break they took. It was the Montreal Effect as he called it himself. Just the mention of that place was enough to drive persons involved or persons who had an opinion on the matter insane. Bret took his seat but remained quiet since technically he had nothing to say until it was time to justify his actions after Montreal. Chris was no longer holding cards in his hand, probably having decided that there was no such thing as staying on track during this particular interview. Bret's eye wandered to the corner where H was sitting. He had his phone out staring down at it as if he'd just lost his best friend and then there was Shawn, whose expression was unreadable. Bret had no earthly idea what was going on in that mind of his, but he hoped that Shawn had not made the verdict before they could even get through that fateful day. Bret wondered if Chris was just waiting on Shawn to continue but before he could ask, Shawn sat up with his game face on.

"Come on Chris. This story isn't gonna tell itself," Shawn grumbled.

Chris nodded his head. "Alright Shawn. Are you ready to tell us your side of the story? We know Bret's. His side is the one we've been hearing about the most over the years and we even have his side on document. We have Vince's whole 'Bret Screwed Bret' speech and we have short interviews of you denying it for three or so years and then recent interviews where you've changed your tune, stating that you knew about the job. In your words Shawn, tell us how you felt that day. From the time you got to the arena until whatever happened when the camera was turned off, tell us your side."

Before Shawn could utter a word, Hunter got to his feet. All three men turned looking at him wondering why he seemed to be fleeing the interview, but H's eyes were still staring down at his phone. He shoved the phone in his pocket then rushed over to Shawn, kneeling down in front of him. "Since being in the room and hearing you recount all of this stuff Shawn has really hit home today."

"Hunter?" Shawn was confused but more worried than anything. He allowed H to take his hand and hold it, noting the saddened expression on his face. "Hunter, you shouldn't be-

"No, let me finish Shawn." He smiled a bit looking down at their hands which were now threaded together. "I guess the things I do are more out of habit ya know? Like coming to your rescue, even when you don't need it. I often forget man that you're not the same guy I met that Monday night years ago. Back then you were weak and in constant need of protection." He chuckled. "I always got a kick outta watching you try to take on a whole bar full of marines and the bar tenders."

This earned him a smile from his friend, who up until this point, wondered if he was capable of smiling again. "Hunter, you know those guys were asking for it. Was it my fault I was so pretty," he teased, grateful for the first time all day that Hunter was in the room.

Only Hunter would know just what to say to bring him out of his funk.

Hunter grinned, squeezing his friend's hand. "Yeah you were something else but I'm pretty sure you did a lot of that stuff cuz you knew big Kev, Scott, and I wouldn't let nothing happen to you."

"I suppose you could be onto something," Shawn grinned. "So what brought this trip down memory lane hm? Are you getting ready to toss the hammer and rage for a new life of saintism and sanity?"

"Oh fuck no!" H laughed. "That's what you are for. Naa man I just…this is my way of saying I'm sorry. I had no right to just barge up in here trying to tell you how to live your life." He reached up cupping the side of Shawn's face and at this, Bret pulled out his phone not wanting to intrude or gag at such a moment since he was still pretty convinced Hunter was a manipulative little shit.

"Shawn, it's hard not to love you, but I know you and I have always been better friends than lovers. I think it's cuz I'm still a selfish bastard and until I learn how to be what you need, I have no right to stand before you asking for your hand again."

Shawn shook his head. "Hunter, I'm kinda used to this. You always come to my aid and I yell at you for doing it but…" He leaned forward pressing their foreheads together. "You make me smile H. You're the reason I'm hanging on now. I'm beyond fed up with this shit and I'm gonna snap soon if I can't leave this room. I think your being here-in the end-was a good thing."

"Yeah well I'm glad one of us think so," he chuckled before pressing a light kiss to his lips. "But I think I should go now."

Shawn did not like this suggestion one bit. "Huh? But why? You were there too you know. You were there that day and you know just as much as I do." He did not like the idea of being left alone for this portion of the interview and what was worse is that he had to be left alone with Bret, the one person he was sure to start biting his head off once the interview picked back up again. He shook his head. "I don't want you to go Hunter. Please," he begged. "Please stay with me."

H kissed his cheek then stood to his feet, cracking a smile though it was horribly forced. "Jeff finally called me. Besides, I know when I've lost Shawn and I don't want to lose everything." He shot one last glare at Bret who merely looked annoyed with him. "I'm sure I'll see you at some point after all of this blows over…even if I don't get invited to Thanksgiving dinner." He thanked Chris for letting him stay then like a bat out of hell, hurried to get out of the building. He needed to buy a plane ticket, roundtrip because he was determined to come back and not empty handed.

Shawn watched H leave, feeling sick to his stomach. He didn't realize how much of an impact Hunter's presence had on him. However, even though his comic relief was gone, he still had to get through this part or he would be stuck here, something he did not want. With a sigh, he leaned back and just started speaking, not really caring if he caught Chris off guard or not. It was weighing too heavily on his mind now anyway so it was time to finish this up. "When I got to the arena, Pat was already waiting for me…"

**x-x-x**

Shawn and Hunter entered the arena; Hunter had his arm around him no doubt in a way to comfort him or possibly ease the tensions he felt but nothing was working. Once they got inside, it was pretty clear to him that everyone knew something was up. As he walked up the hall to put his bags in the locker room, he heard the hushed whispers and could feel eyes on him, eyes that made him extremely uncomfortable. To make matters worse, Pat was lurking outside the door which meant he was waiting for him to show up. Hunter took the bags from him hurrying inside leaving him to speak with Pat alone. Shawn tried to make it look like he was just warming up. He started jogging in place a bit while Pat hovered near him looking stone faced but Shawn could tell he was just as nervous about tonight as he was. "Pat, I'm not sure you should be standing here with me," he said quietly, now stretching a bit. "I'm fine, but all you're doing is drawing more attention to me than necessary."

"Sorry Shawn, but I'm actually here on Vince's orders," he said. "I don't know if you've talked to him since last night but people are talking now."

"Oh yeah you think?" Shawn snapped, but then he quickly apologized. "Look, I'm sorry Pat. I'm just stressed is all. No, before you ask, I have not changed my mind. I'm doing this. I already agreed to go through with it so save the speech."

Pat lowered his voice. "Look, I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable, but you've been attacked twice already in the last month and your dressing room has been trashed several times. Just…let me do my job alright?"

Shawn rolled his eyes. "I'd rather not." He left Pat outside the door and went inside to find Hunter who was pretty much sitting alone scowling at the others. Of course when Shawn entered the room everyone seemed to find some reason or another to step out. Once they were all alone, Hunter cursed loudly, his frustrations clearly showing in his voice.

Shawn was equally frustrated and it did not help that his best friend was too. He sat down next to Hunter and started combing through his hair, the gesture keeping him from going insane due to the enormous amount of tension in the building. There was a soft knock on the door and Shawn all but snapped. Angrily he got to his feet, pulling the door open. He blinked, most of his anger subsiding due to the shock. "Bret?"

"Uh…yeah. Say listen…can we maybe go somewhere and talk privately?" Hunter cast him a look that pretty much said fuck no, but Bret sighed and Shawn was pulled out of the room anyway.

Shawn snatched away from him frowning, not wanting to be anywhere near Bret let alone seen conversing with him alone. "What do _you_ want? Can't you see I'm trying to get ready?"

Bret rolled his eyes. "Yes, because combing your hair over and over while already dressed to perform is getting ready."

"You know what? I don't need this." He turned to leave but was once again pulled back. "Bret!"

"Shawn I just wanted to go over the match with you is all," he said admittedly. "I…well I'm sure you can understand why since you, me, and Vince have been disagreeing on finishes all week. I honest to God just wanna know what I'm getting myself into. Not that I don't trust you but, you know. Just gotta be sure."

Shawn had to fight to make himself ignore the word 'trust' because trust was definitely something Bret shouldn't be thinking so naively about. Shawn couldn't really bring himself to answer so he nodded, listening as Bret went over a few false finishes all the while somewhat spaced out since he still had no idea what exactly Vince was planning to do. "So I'm gonna put you in the sharpshooter but I want you to reverse it since I know you probably don't wanna tap at all. It's not your thing."

"Huh?" Shawn blinked, looking down as the wheels in his head started turning. This was the opening needed since up until now, nothing was set in stone. Last he heard, they were gonna go with a DQ finish, which is exactly what Bret was pitching to him. The problem Vince had in those secret meetings was that he was pretty sure Bret wasn't crazy enough to allow a hold to be put on him. But here Hart was digging his own hole and though Shawn was excited to finally have something to give Vince, he also felt gut-wrenching guilt that made him want to hurl all over the place.

"Hey Shawn? Shawn are you alright?" Bret asked, genuinely concerned.

Shawn looked up realizing that he had zoned out a little too much. "Oh yeah. I'm fine. Just was going over the finish in my head," he lied, feeling that much sicker. He was starting to sweat and he was sure his headache was reaching borderline migraine status.

Bret reached out touching his face. "You feel hot." He touched his neck too just to be sure. "You might even have a small fever. You should get some rest after tonight."

"Yeah. I'm sure I will." He started backing away reminding himself that those hands would never comfort him again. "Guess I'll see you in the ring."

Bret nodded. "Yeah but…for what it's worth, kinda wish things could have ended differently."

Shawn shrugged, pretending not to care. "You know what they say-all good things must come to an end someday." He turned hurrying away as quickly as possible, needing to find Pat to deliver the news of the finish and trying his damndest not to look back, for it was too late.

* * *

**AN: This is a bridge chapter. Only 3 chapters left folks and its done. How do i know you have 3 left? Because I actually finished it! Ha! I FINISHED this fic xD Imagine what u can do when u are internet-less for months **

_- I don't think I need to add anything to this note. By now u know that there are some inaccuracies tho most of the stuff with Bret and Shawn this chapter came straight from Heartbreak & Triumph the DVD. Shawn said he talked with Bret before the match and Bret gave him the opening Vince needed._

_- I'm doing a happy dance. It is totally finished xD_

_- To **Icon HBK**, THANK YOU! To log in and see such a wonderful honest review makes my day. I'm glad you enjoyed my fic and I promise you that it's finished in full. I hope you all enjoy the ending. It's not great but I am at peace with it._


	31. Survivor Series 1997

****Survivor Series 1997****

"By now, I had completely shut off my emotions to Bret. I would feel him getting to me but then the wall would come up," he continued quietly, the strain of this tale written all over his face. "The little quote was just me trying to sound cold but feeling anything but."

Chris nodded then turned to Bret. "You want to add something here Hart?"

Bret, who was just trying to keep from asking Shawn a bunch of selfish questions, shrugged. "Not really. I mean, I still had groups of people coming around saying that they saw Shawn with Vince or Pat, but I was so wrapped up in my movie that I didn't think too much of it. I told ya already. Shawn and I were done but that doesn't mean I didn't still love him to a degree. I just figured since he and I had such a history that entertaining ideas of him screwing me over would be a waste of time. I thought he had enough respect for me and what we had not to do something like that."

"Key word-_had_," Shawn spoke up, feeling angry and annoyed at Bret. He supposed Bret was trying to make him feel a little guilty about it all. Unfortunately, it was only pissing him off since the only guilt he had lied in the match itself. "And before you start preaching about our love and respect," he continued, "let me remind you that _you_ were the one who called it quits for good and _you_ were the one who felt like we were fooling ourselves so the way I see it, I had every right to be McMahon's bullet if you will."

Bret sighed. The strain of the session had worn him down as well making it so that he could barely muster the strength to quarrel with the blonde anymore. "Shawn, I'm sorry you were hurt, but you're making it seem like you and I hadn't called it quits before. By this time you and I were pretty much done for good anyway so-"

"So instead of just fighting to keep it together like we always did," he snapped, cutting Bret off again, "you suddenly had a shocking revelation that we wouldn't make it right? It wasn't like both of us didn't know from the first day you screwed my brains out in the shower that a relationship would be impossible and yet…" He paused cutting Bret a dirty look. "Good to know I was just an excellent fuck buddy."

"Shawn stop it!" Bret snapped. Not only was he tired, but he was also growing equally agitated by Shawn's argument that he was only a good lay which wasn't true at all. In truth, Shawn was his everything. He just wasn't certain how to handle it at a time when so many things weren't acceptable, an excuse that he was regretting more and more as the interview dragged on. "You know full well you were more than that but the heart of it is, I was leaving you behind for an array of reasons," he justified. "You were just moments away from giving into Hunter so with me gone and you no longer obligated to me, I did Hunter a favor and I set you free…I set us both free," he added quietly looking almost disgusted with his own words. He turned facing Shawn who was fidgeting with his bracelet and chewing on his lip, a sure sign that something was on the tip of his tongue but probably unsure if he should speak up or not. Bret reached for Shawn's hand again, but it was snatched away as if he was some deadly disease.

"Don't," he growled, leering at Bret. "Don't you dare touch me! Just…don't say anything else to me. You…I was so pissed at you for just throwing us away like we didn't matter and by you not telling me that you were going away, I felt abandoned again; like scum since apparently I didn't matter enough anymore to tell such important information and _free_? You set us both _free_?" he asked disbelievingly. "Yeah Bret," he scoffed, rolling his eyes. "You set us free alright."

"Oh come on Shawn," he challenged. "You mean to tell me there was never a night you didn't wanna be set free from all the drama? There was never a night where you wished you'd have never let me hold you the night after the rape?"

This touched whatever last nerve the blonde had left and he just exploded on his ex, his face filled with rage. "Of course I had those thoughts Bret!" he screamed. "God I…I had them all the time, but I kept reminding myself that I knew what I was getting myself into from day one. It…" He choked back a sob and then another until he crying all over again, hating both himself and Bret for being stupid years ago.

Bret scooted his chair closer, reaching for that same hand, but Shawn jumped up wanting to stay far away from hands that used to comfort him. "No-just…I always knew that society wasn't ready and God knows I knew you would never come out and own up to being my lover. I can't really hate you for that today because I get it. Your family would disown you and Lord knows I wasn't worth it."

Bret stood, taking small steps towards Shawn, holding up his hands defensively. "I-I guess I can't argue with you on that point even though I might feel differently today. My father…"

He looked away letting his voice trail off as he recalled having a few conversations with his father about all the fairies they used to haze in his time. Sometimes he wondered if his father got some sick pleasure out of it, but then he would remember that his father never messed with anyone unless they fucked with him first. He brushed thoughts of his father aside continuing quietly with his explanation.

"At that time in my life, I just wanted to make my dad proud and watch over my baby brother. He was all I had until you came along Shawn." Bret stepped a little closer grateful that the blonde had not moved again. "I never expected I'd fall stupid in love-and with a guy for that matter but you…" Now that he was close enough to finally touch, he lightly cupped the side of a face he was sure he'd see in his dreams all over again. "You were breathtaking Shawn and despite all the mess we made, this interview has made me realize that I don't regret our time together. I loved you-still do and I believe if we could have gone away together from everything-people-just…the business in general to be together then we could have made it princess. We…" He wiped his eyes, wishing he could put his arms around Shawn and just throw the past away; pretend that it never happened, but he knew it wasn't that simple. When it came to him and Shawn, it was never exactly simple and never will.

Shawn moved away from him across the tiny room, his arms wrapped around himself for added comfort. The room was quiet for a long time, each man still taking it all in as they neared the finish line. When Shawn felt calm enough to continue, he turned around leaning back against the wall for support. "You know how the rest of the story goes," he said looking down at his feet, avoiding Bret's knowing eyes and Chris' concerned ones. "I went back inside to tell Hunter what Bret and I discussed, but Hunter said I was to go see Pat immediately. So I did. I met Pat in the production truck. I told him of the finish and then we were joined moments later by Vince. By now, I didn't really feel like talking much so Pat told him for me and that's when Vince gave me orders. He said that at some point during the match he along with Pat, Hunter and a few others would make their way ringside. I was supposed to keep going about the match as if none of it concerned me. Once Bret was in the reverse sharpshooter, Vince would stop the match then I would leave the building as soon as possible just in case something went wrong."

Already he could see it clearly in his mind. Hunter was rubbing his shoulders backstage while he waited for his music to hit. Most nights, once his music hit, he left all the drama of outside the ring behind but he would not have that luxury this night.

"In case," Chris continued, "in case there was riot right?"

Shawn nodded still avoiding Bret's gaze. "He feared for my safety more than I did since I already felt like my life didn't really matter anymore. I was-this was around the time my addiction to pain killers and drinking picked back up, but for some reason, I still didn't have the heart to show up high for Bret's last match. Maybe that was partly because I still had some respect for him or maybe it was because I needed to feel every emotion from that night. I…don't know."

He paused a moment as the scene formed in his head. "Bret and I wrestled a nearly perfect match as always. I forgot all about the actual deed to take place later and just wrestled as he called it every now and then throwing my own thing in it. It wasn't until I was on the ground locked in a chokehold that I spotted Vince along with Pat, Arn and Hunter coming towards the ring. I think a couple of refs or security guys were with them-I can't really remember. That was the point in the match where I realized that this was really happening. I think Bret ignored them cause he didn't deviate at all from what we discussed."

"I looked up," Bret added quietly. "I kinda frowned, wondering if this was all apart of the DQ finished added at the last minute, but I also had a feeling something wasn't right. I think I brushed it off because in the back of my mind I knew Shawn would have no part of it."

"You're starting to annoy me with all of the praise Bret," Shawn said rolling his eyes. "These things you keep saying about me are naïve considering how badly things ended between us."

"Sorry Shawn. Guess I thought…never mind. Thinking maybe I put you too high on a pedestal."

Shawn glared at him. "Yeah, guess you did Mr. Loyalty and now for the big finish. Here Chris, is the reason why Bretty married a cute, petite blonde woman while I'm gonna be alone for the rest of my life because the guy I was hours away from proposing to ran off." He laughed a little as his life seemed to come full circle. "They always leave me behind. Marty, Kevin, Scott, Bret, and now John."

"Shawn…" Bret paused just now realizing what was said. "Wait, _fiance_?" he asked, needing to be certain he heard right. "You wanted to _marry _John?" he questioned feeling a tad bit annoyed by this even though technically it wasn't his business.

"I love him Bret. Since it's no longer a crime to be with the one you love, I thought I'd go ahead and seal the deal so he wouldn't be tempted to walk out on me like all the others before him," he said bitterly. "Now…let me finish this so we can all go home and drown ourselves in bottles of Crown; that habit taken clearly from the first guy that abandoned me and no, I don't mean Marty. That's a story in itself and one I will never tell."

Shawn wiped his eyes which were now puffy and red from all of the crying. His face felt hot and sticky from the tears while the rest of his body felt like an anvil was strapped to his back. He looked back down at his feet, a single tear dropping on his boot as he recalled the last bits of that awful day…

**XX-**-XX**

The bell sounded then everything else happened in almost a blur. Shawn rolled over to the edge of the ring. The noise in the arena was so loud that he was having trouble hearing his ownself think. He looked up at the man standing next to him and as expected, he was confused and irate. Shawn frowned. The match was over so now he had to play his part and pretend like he was equally confused and angry even though he only felt like hurling. He saw the spit out the corner of his eye hit Vince's face but he didn't see much else. Hands were all over him pulling him out of the ring then Hunter shoved the belt in his hands. "Go!" Hunter yelled. "Vince says we must get you outta here."

Shawn began a brisk walk towards the ramp holding up the belt proudly like a good little boy, but then Arn grabbed his arm tugging him up the ramp with Hunter covering his right. He was getting wet which meant people were throwing things at him. He couldn't help it. He had to look back, but he couldn't see what was going on. When they reached the top of the ramp, the rest of the Hart family came from around the curtain leering at him. Shawn continued to play his part, but as he reached the backstage area he could hardly breath. A few of the superstars were hanging around, most of them leering at him as if he was some sort of disease. Both Hunter and Arn yelled at them as they steered the now shaking blonde into Vince's office shutting the door. Shawn's legs would barely hold him up anymore so he was grateful for the comfy chair, the belt hanging limply from his hands.

"Shawn…" Hunter kneeled in front of him, rubbing his knees. "You alright? You're shaking." Shawn allowed Hunter's attempt at comforting him, but he knew nothing could console him right now. He would not feel any kind of comfort until he was out of Canada and back home in Texas.

The door of Vince's office burst open and in walked a shaken Vince and Pat. "Shawn? Shawn you did good," Vince said quickly, rubbing his cheek. "But now I need you to get the hell out of here," he ordered.

Shawn forced himself up, still dragging the belt as if it weighed tons. "How'd it go?" he asked nervously. "Where's Bret?" Even though Bret was leaving he was certain a part of him would always care what happens to him and right now he could not help wondering if Bret would be alright.

"Shawn, there's no time for that now sweetheart," Pat said grimly, poking his head out of the door. "Alright. Coast is clear. Hunter, you get him the hell out of here as quickly as possible."

"Oh and Shawn," Vince added as his body was being shoved out of the door. "You knew absolutely nothing," he whispered. "You tell them that you didn't know. I want all the blame on me. Deny it-even to Bret." Vince pushed him on out of the office and feeling rather annoyed, he allowed Hunter to lead him back towards the locker room. As they neared their destination the, he noticed that there seemed to be more commotion coming from this end of the arena than Vince's office.

"Oh guys! There's Shawn Michaels! Hey Shawn!" a guy yelled. Like a pack of hungry wolves, he was rushed by cameramen and then a blonde woman whom he knew all too well. It made him even more uncomfortable and he was half of mind to go back to Vince's office.

"You-how could you!" the blonde lady shouted. "You're _evil_ Shawn. Nothing good will come of this."

Shawn was not in the mood to argue with any of the Hart family, especially since he was tempted to use his best defense-his mouth-to tell them all that their perfect little King of Harts fucked him on a regular basis for almost two years, but he let it slide. He felt like throwing up, his back was screaming and he was ready to pop a few pills to sleep it all away. Instead of bothering in attempts to defend himself, he did as he was told, ignoring any questions as he pushed his way into the locker room. Unfortunately he was followed by Bret's crew and much to his dismay, Bret was already inside sitting quietly in a chair, his gorgeous dark locks blanketing his face as he stared down at the ground.

Since he and Bret were finished, Shawn had every intention of ignoring him. Engaging him in conversation was out of the question not to mention he was sure they both had a mutual loathing for one another by now. Nothing good would come of a conversation. Instead, Shawn tossed the belt in his bag before gathering his things so he could leave. The tension in the room was so thick you could cut it with a knife. Making matters worse, he was still being questioned by that nosy bastard of a cameraman and he was still pretending as if buddy boy didn't exist. Perfect plan.

"So did you know?"

Yeah so it was a perfect plan. The bottle of water he was packing fell out of his hand and when he bent down to pick it up, he realized he was shaking. He took a deep breath. _Come on Shawn. Grab the fucking bottle and get out of here. _He scooped up the bottle, casually tossing it in his bag continuing on with his packing. He glanced over at Bret, ignoring the knowing look. "Nope."

And he was going to leave it at that but Bret wasn't buying it. As if he would and Shawn knew that Vince knew this little detail as well. Nevertheless it was too late now so act his part he must despite conflicting feelings about it all.

"Sure Shawn? Sure you didn't know that was gonna go down? Just…tell the truth." He could feel Bret's knowing eyes looking right through the façade but he had to do as told. After all, somewhere in the back of his mind he knew Bret disserved this for all the bullshit he put them all through and for personal reasons. He hoisted his bag over his shoulder grabbing Hunter's bag as well. As he started out the door, he looked back at Bret just long enough to answer him. "I swear to you. I…had no clue." His voice was lighter than usual. He knew this, but any heavier and Bret could hear the wavering. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He was supposed to feel some overwhelming satisfaction from this by now so where the hell was it? He needed to go. "Goodnight."

"No. Wait. I need you to stay put for a bit longer," said Bret, though it sounded more like a demand than an actual request which Shawn didn't like one bit.

Feigning fatigue he shook his head. The idea of having to stay in this room alone with Bret was making him sweat harder than he did during the actual wrestling match. "Bret I'm tired," he complained. "I didn't sleep at all last night and whatever this is I can't help you. Vince is boss so go yell at him. I don't think I can take it from you tonight."

Bret pushed past him for the door not giving a damn. "I never said I was gonna yell at you. Just…the least you could fucking do is hear me out."

Shawn raised his brows, not liking the fact that the man who dumped him felt like he could still make demands and order him around. He was definitely not in the mood for a Hart's ego so he dropped his bags, exploding because he really could not take much of anything anymore. It was either scream irately or start crying. "Fuck you Bret!" he screamed. "I didn't do anything! I went out there and wrestled a damn near perfect fucking match doing everything _you_ wanted and I was more than willing to let you have that stupid fucking DQ ending all because king ego didn't wanna lose in Canada! I've about had it with you and your fucking pride issues! It's not my fault!"

Bret whipped around, his icy glare pinning Shawn. "Cut the fucking cameras for a moment and get the hell out," he growled, motioning for everyone else to take a hike. "I need a moment alone with the new champ," he spat. Shawn rolled his eyes and once they were alone, Bret closed the gap between them shoving him back against the wall. "That sounded like a pretty vague confession to me princess," he hissed. "But as vague as it might be, when mixed with the look on your face or your trembling body before me, it's as good as gold in the court of King ego as you so rightly put it."

He shoved him again, this time Shawn wincing a bit from the pain in his back. He winced from the pain to keep from wondering what else Bret noticed. "Go ahead Shawn," Bret continued angrily. "Why don't you go ahead and tell me what we both already know. You knew. Tell me you fucking knew!" he pushed.

Shawn tried staring back at him defiantly looking as stupid as possible but he was failing miserably due to his body not cooperating. The trembling was much worse now and the only thing keeping his body up was the wall behind him. His heart was beating annoyingly fast to the point where he was almost sure Bret could hear it too. Shawn kept fighting, trying to keep eye contact with Bret and further deny his words. However, every time he looked up, his voice would catch in his throat forcing a shake of the head. He simply could not help it with all of the things going on inside of him and he was breaking whether he wanted to or not.

Bret scoffed, crossing his arms over his chest making Shawn feel really distant to him, a feeling only adding to the sickness he felt in the pit of his stomach. Shawn finally gave up the fight lowering his head. The only thing he was fighting now were tears and even that was taking too much energy. Mixed with Bret's voice, which seemed so empty and cold, was enough to cloud his eyes. He didn't like Bret's tone yet he knew he deserved it.

"You can't even look me in the eye Shawn," Bret said with a slight chuckle, sounding real amused. "It was so easy for you Heartbreaker two minutes ago when the cameras were in here; when I was a safe distance away but now look at you," he said quietly, his voice filled with contempt as his eyes studied the almost broken man before him. "Look how you cower before me," he sang "practically confessing anyway, but that's okay Shawn. It was good while it lasted, but I should have known loyalty and trust were something foreign to you. You're not like me Shawn and you know, we really were fooling ourselves."

Shawn felt hands that were once gentle grip his slumping shoulders jerking his body up against the wall. "Bret…" He managed to choke out the name. The explanation-the lie Vince ordered him to tell-was on the tip of his tongue, but it wouldn't come out. Only sobs as he felt his body being straightened against the wall, his head raised enough to see the clenched fist and a face that once showed him love now cold and dark. Bret was crying. Despite his handsome face being contorted in a rage, he was crying all well. A part of Shawn wanted to dropped down at Bret's feet and seek forgiveness but the stubborn Shawn, the Shawn who knew in his heart that he did the right thing for business wished he could find the strength to channel the real Shawn.

The real Shawn would fight back. He'd kick the living shit out of Bret then tell the world how they fucked in the showers all the time. He'd tell Stu how he really felt about all of his teachings then possibly apologize to Davey and Owen since he never really had any issues with either of them. He wanted to be that guy who tossed a chair at Bret two weeks ago; the strong guy who didn't give one flying fuck if he ever saw this face again but the longer he was hit with cold, dark eyes, the less likely it seemed that the real HBK ever existed. He choked out another sob, dropping his head, but Bret gripped his face forcing it back up.

"Shut up!" he screamed. "Just shut up!"

"Bret I-It wasn't me," he cried. "Vince…he…I didn't-"

"God do you ever fucking shut up! Just…shut _up_!" He clenched his fist even tighter if it was possible, drawing back even more to hit him in the face. Shawn flinched, biting down hard on his trembling lip. He didn't want to get yelled at anymore so he shut up waiting for impact. Bret's rage filled face slowly diminished into one filled with hurt and confusion. It was as if Bret had him anyway so he dropped his eyes. "No, no!" Bret yelled. "Look at me dammit! You owe me this moment!"

Shawn looked up, his eyelids feeling so very heavy. Bret loosened the grip on his face but kept his hand in place just in case. "You know Shawn, there's a big part of me that wishes I could pull you into my arms and make your pain go away like I used to in the beginning." At this Shawn choked out another sob, leaning forward a bit subconsciously reaching out for that familiar warmth but Bret forced him back against the cool, hard wall. "I said a part of me Shawn," he repeated forcefully, his own eyes still streaming water. "I never said I was going to. You're impossible Shawn, but you were _my_ impossibility. Each night you were squirming beneath me screaming my name and telling me you loved me made that impossibility seem more than possible." Bret slowly unclenched his fist lowering his hand to his side. "I can't hit you," he said quietly. "I thought you knew me better than that Shawn. I thought you knew I would never really hurt you, but maybe you don't know me at all. Just like I don't know who you are anymore."

Bret leaned close enough for a kiss, Shawn's eyes closing at the feel of the warm breath against him. His heart skipped a beat, him thinking naively he would be forgiven despite the lack of a true confession but nothing happened. Shawn opened his eyes, his heart breaking even more in two as his ex backed away from him looking disgusted. "I _never_ wanna see you again. I'm gonna assume the feeling's mutual. Good luck champ. You have no equal anymore. It's finally all about Shawn."

**XX-**-XX**

"I…literally broke after Bret left the room," Shawn continued, speaking quietly with a controlled voice, masking the urge to react just as he did twelve years ago. "I cried for a long time and roughly twenty minutes later, Hunter came to my rescue. He took me back to the hotel, gave me the pills I normally popped after a bad day then I was out cold. I don't remember much else about that night," he sniffled.

Chris nodded, his expression just as somber as Shawn's. "It's okay Shawn. You told the parts that mattered and now the truth is out in the open. I have to ask though since I remember this like it was yesterday. You and DX cut a promo on Bret the next night on Raw. I'm sure you had no choice for storyline purposes but, how was it for you the next night? Was it hard?"

Shawn finally looked up avoiding Bret's gaze. He thought about the next night on Raw but most of it was a big blur due to all of the pills he popped. "The next night on Raw was hell for me mentally because I no longer wanted the belt. I felt like the belt was cursed and I wasted no time storming Vince's office giving him hell. He probably didn't think too much of it though. I can remember Vince trying to comfort me but I left his side to pop a few more pills. I was really high that night but if it wasn't for those pills, I don't think I could have handled the pressure," he explained. "I was champ again which meant all eyes were on me and the success of the company now rested on the shoulders of an emotional wreck and a physically exhausted me."

Shawn wiped his eyes pushing himself from against the wall. "I'm going home now," he said tiredly, just barely able to stand. Now all he could think about was curling up under the covers sleeping for a very long time. "I've done my part by telling everything and I've apologized. I'm sure by now everyone knows I broke my back just three months later which you could say was my karma from God. Bret suffered a career ending concussion-he didn't deserve it though-and I broke my back. Romeo and Juliet had nothing on us," he finished, reaching to clasp the cross around his neck.

Chris nodded his head. "I can't ask anything more from either of you. Bret before I take my ass home and start leaving messages on Shawn's twitter begging for forgiveness, is there anything else you wanna say?"

Bret's hands were in his pockets as he stared at the floor drained and an emotional mess. He was pretty positive every bit of Shawn's recount of that fateful night had been the truth. He just didn't remember saying some of those things. After being screwed over like that, he was angry at everyone, but mostly Shawn. Shawn was the guy he shared private things with that not even Owen knew much about. With Shawn, he could tell him anything and not have to worry about being judged. Soon they became best friends and due to curiosity, lovers. It was supposed to be one time; one night and one time, but one time led to another and another until he just couldn't get enough.

Sure maybe he had the thought that it was just about the sex, but that thought kept him from breaking down at family dinners revealing to his dad and cousins that the guy twisting and shaking his ass in the ring like a fairy was his lover. God how he hated listening to them talk bad about Shawn and even Jeff Jarrett, whom he began to respect after wrestling him a few times. He was a good person, much like the guy who used to be "his" Shawn since right now, he wasn't so sure that was the case anymore. Bret looked over at Chris. "I do want to say a few words, but in private. Can Shawn and I stay here for a few?"

Chris turned the camera off gathering his things. "You two can have anything you want." Chris reached in his pocket for his keys. "Bret…Shawn…thank you. The door's locked so just pull it tight as you leave." Chris wasted no time getting the hell out of there. He was ready for the editing process and then it would be all over. He just hoped that the two former lovers were finally at peace with one another.

When Chris was well out of sight, Bret resumed his seat sitting quietly as Shawn forced himself back into his own chair. As soon as Shawn sat, Bret reached over placing his warm hand on top of Shawn's. They looked at each other and for the first time in years there was no contempt or rage. Only a mutual understanding of forgiveness that could not be put into words. Bret was the first to look away, trying is best not to get sucked into those eyes he loved so much. "Where do we go from here Shawn?"

Shawn turned away, closing his eyes, Bret's question echoing over and over in his head. Where exactly did they go from here? He wasn't sure. "Why are you asking me?"

Bret squeezed Shawn's hand ignoring the gold band shining around his own finger. "Because I already told you what I want Shawn. Nothing has changed. What happens next in our lives depends on you."

Bret got up standing over Shawn. He extended his hand pulling the blonde to his feet and into his arms embracing him for what could very well be the last time. Bret nuzzled his neck then kissed the top of his head. "What do you want Shawn? We're alone and you said earlier that you were tired of people always making decisions for you. I was listening for a change," he joked.

He held Shawn tighter against him, molding that precious body against his hoping he never had to let go, but not getting his hopes up too high. He sighed, combing through Shawn's hair. "No one's around to tell you what to do so what does your heart want Shawn? What's gonna happen when we both walk out that door?"

* * *

**AN: If you go back and watch the match from Survivor Series '97, there's a moment when Shawn yells at Earl to ring the bell. I left that out, but Shawn's recount of the events in his book/dvd says Earl knew before hand that Vince was gonna order him to ring the bell, but I'm gonna assume he freaked out. Maybe he was scared of Bret but truth be told, Vince is scarier. I'm convinced he's like some God of the underworld.**

_- The end is nearing. Can you feel it?_

_- Again, not much else to say. One more chapter then the epilogue. I guarantee some ppl will hate it but whatever. I'm happy. My head's content. I can't ask for much more. I hope you at least review the final chapter. I'd love to know what you think and how I can improve as a writer. I seriously need to work on my original fics but I couldn't focus enough as long as Montreal was on the brain._

_- Thank you to all you faithful reviewers and readers. I told you I wouldn't give up. I lied. I gave up several times but then when the young Shawn lives in your head eventually he starts yelling. Its the older Shawn who didn't want to cooperate with this fic. He's so stubborn._

_- I'd like to give a shout out to my roleplaying buddies. A lot of times, you guys helped me iron out kinks to this fic and others with your powerful characters. Love you lots! We have the best fandom ever ;)_

_- I apologize for the delays with this fic but...guys...this was so draining._


	32. Where Do We Go From Here?

****Where Do We Go From Here?****

Hunter only ever visited Matt's home in Cameron once since Jeff and Matt haven't really been talking much since a whole lot of stuff went down at work. Still he hoped that Matt would take the time and listen to his story. Bret had a lot of people confused and it didn't help that Shawn was the type of guy you never get over. Plus, Shawn was his first love too and Hunter knew he would never get over him as long as they remained best friends, which he hoped would be forever.

He climbed the stairs of Matt's porch. After taking a deep breath calming his nerves, he rang the doorbell. In his head he prayed over and over, hoping to God he hadn't fucked up. He loved his best friend, but Jeff was everything to him that Shawn couldn't be and he did not want to give up on him, not without a fight. He came here prepared to beg if he must, especially since Jeff often kept him out of trouble and vice versa. That kid was a joy to wake up next to in the mornings and even more of a joy to be with. His carefree, live for the moment attitude changed Hunter in many ways. He could write a book on Nero if he wasn't so damn lazy.

The door swung open and there stood Jeff, phone in hand with newly dyed red hair all over the place as if he had just been sleeping. Only a glass door stood between them that had Hunter sweating bricks. If only that door wasn't there. He could just fling himself at Jeff's feet, holding him close and asking for forgiveness. Sure to others that might seem like a chicken shit move, but no one knew him the way Jeff or Shawn did. Hunter knew he was a selfish bastard and pretty difficult to live with at times, but Jeff did it like a charm. He doubted anyone else could stand to be around him like Jeff. He had sense enough to know this and when he saw that missed call from Jeff, he realized that his place was not at Shawn's side, but at Jeff's. This is the way it was supposed to be, but he knew the decision was not his to make.

Hunter shoved his hands in his pockets, speaking just loud enough to be heard clearly through the glass. "You know why I'm here Jeff. I fucked up big time again, but I'm willing to stand here on this porch all night if I have to if that's what it takes to get you to understand that I'm where I wanna be." Hunter leaned back against the glass crossing his arms. "One of these days Jeff I'm gonna learn to stay outta Shawn's business, but he's been my best pal for so long that it's hard for me. I've seen him go through so many changes and it just upsets me when something or somebody comes along threatening his happiness. But the flip side to this Jeffrey is that I feel the same way about you. I hate seeing you cry and it's only worse when I know that I'm the cause of it."

He paused a moment, waiting to see if Jeff would open the door but when he didn't, Hunter continued with his explanation. "This is the second time I've royally fucked up in less than a year. It's a new record if ya wanna know the truth. I usually fuck up at least once a week so I think I'm doing better." He sighed. "I know things are kinda weird right now, but I told Shawn before I left that I didn't want to lose you. I left him with Bret and told him that whatever happens, well…I'll just have to accept it as being what Shawn wants. I realized at some point doing that mess of an interview that I can't be his protector when it comes to his personal life. I realized that…all I've been doing is pushing you away even though you've been patiently putting up with all of my running back and forth. You could have left me the second I started getting those looks about me, but ya didn't."

Hunter turned to the side, touching the cool glass with the palm of his hand. "I wish this door wasn't between us Jeff. I wish I could hold you in my arms, apologize 1000 times then take you back home. I'm not even sure that's gonna be enough to get through to you, but I'll keep trying Jeff. You mean that much to me. Please don't…" He paused a minute to wipe his eyes, hoping to God he wasn't about to go home alone tomorrow morning. "Please don't make me go home alone. I need you Jeff. I don't wanna think about starting all over again with someone else cuz ya know, there's no one else like you. You're special and-"

"Shut up." Hunter jumped back, the door swinging open. Jeff stepped out onto the porch, shaking his head with a tiny smile on his face. "Just…shut up Hunt." He shoved his phone back in his pocket, relieved that he didn't try calling H again. He didn't want to come off as desperate even though he already made up his mind hours ago to go back home to Hunter. He knew how much Hunter cared for Shawn. His eyes were opened during the whole JBL incident, but he would still get jealous of Shawn from time to time. He reckoned it would always be like this and he would just have to trust that it would always end with Hunter coming back home where he belonged.

Hunter looked unsure of what to do. He was fidgeting, seemingly waiting for Jeff to send him home alone, but Jeff merely rolled his eyes then popped him aside the head.

"Ouch! What was that for?" he sulked.

Jeff crossed his arms. "You know you deserved that for being such a dick and I should send you back home alone anyway. Problem with that scenario is that I'd be stuck here living with my whiny brother who hasn't gotten laid in ages. I guess I have no choice but to leave with you since you came all this way back for me. I hope you realize though that these constant urges you have to be Shawn's savior are getting old," he said still scolding Hunter. "I told you a few months ago. The man wants people to stop interfering in his life."

"I know, I know," Hunter mumbled. "I'm gonna learn eventually. Maybe if you keep smacking me around, it'll start to finally sink in," he said, smiling weakly.

Jeff sighed. "Just…come inside. I know you're tired so get upstairs and get a nap. My brother and I will make dinner then you can start apologizing all over again."

Hunter couldn't ask for much more so without any arguments he followed Jeff inside grateful that he was being given another chance.

**XX-**-XX**

Adam and John boarded two separate planes since John was going back to Stamford while Adam was meeting the guys in Chicago for a house show. Adam gave John a big hug and a toothy grin. Adam loved being right and he was certainly right about John not really wanting to let go of Shawn. He encouraged his friend to grovel since he was stupid enough to leave him behind in the first place. Whatever happened after that…well…at least John could say that he tried. Adam called Randy who was waiting for him with open arms at the airport.

"God I'm glad you're back," Randy said, hugging him quickly. "So what's the deal? Did you find John? I've been calling you all night but your phone was turned off."

"Yeah," he winced. "Sorry pookie, but I didn't want my phone interrupting John and me. I found him up at his cabin. He was working as usual, but I was able to get through to him. He's on his way back to Stamford as we speak," he said smugly, feeling very proud of himself. "He should get there before Shawn leaves since Chris says they're done with the interview. I talked to him just a few minutes ago. He sounded pretty beat, but I don't feel sorry for the nosy git at all. That should teach him to mind his own damn business for a change."

Randy quirked his brow. "Someone should take their own advice."

"Oh come on! At least I had good reasoning for interfering. Not like I was trying to get high ratings for The Cutting Edge now come on. Let's get something to eat. I'm starving!"

Randy chuckled. "Sure thing drama queen. Just one thing though. Is John gonna call you or something later? I got to know how this all ends. I was snooping around your laptop and the whole Montreal thing really is quite fascinating."

Adam smirked. "I knew you'd eventually see things my way." He put his arm around Randy's waist as they walked. "Well, I'm hoping he'll at least call by Monday. I don't really expect him to do much tonight or tomorrow. I'm sure if things work out, they'll need time to talk, go over the interview, and all that good stuff."

Randy nodded. "Understandable, now where to blondie? I think I'm in the mood for a hamburger."

Adam popped his gum. "Hmmm…I was thinking a little fancier. Say…you on a nice bed of clean sheets?" he teased.

Randy picked up the pace. "You know, that works too," he grinned as they raced out of the airport.

**XX-**-XX**

When John rolled out of bed that morning, he was all for going back to retrieve his kitten but the longer he thought about it, the more he realized what a mistake that would be. He ran off and left Shawn all alone with his ex so what right did he have to go back and interfere, especially when he was certain Shawn was more confused than ever right now? He didn't which is why instead of boarding the plane for Stamford, he boarded one ten minutes later one way to Texas, and not San Antonio either. Nope. He was going back home to Houston. He was going to call the office making plans to be there bright and early for work. He would bury himself in his workload hoping it would help him forget all about the man he often envisioned spending the rest of his life with.

He pushed open the front door of his Texas home, a whiff of Shawn's favorite evergreen candles hitting his nostrils. This was going to be a lot harder than he thought, but hopefully a hot bath plus more work would do the trick. He flipped his phone to silent then headed upstairs to get comfortable for a long, lonely evening of paperwork.

Miz was waiting at the door to take Chris's coat and camera as he dragged his body into the room. Chris fell back onto the bed; Miz joining him moments later as the two of them lay in silence, enjoying each other's company. Chris rolled over on his side, smiling a little. "It's finally over Miz. It's all done. All that's left now is the editing."

Miz kissed his cheek. "Congrats man. You made it through the impossible interview. How does it feel now that you're finally done?"

Chris looked down. "To be honest Mike, it's not exactly a grand feeling. I thought maybe it would feel cool ya know? I managed to reunite old friends and rivals. I got the exclusive of a lifetime. I figured in the beginning that by the time it was over, I could get on my show, strut about the ring smugly and give the audience what they've all secretly longed for."

"But…?" Miz asked.

Chris shrugged. "Guess it just doesn't feel right anymore, especially after all the things I've seen and heard." Chris sat up on the bed reaching over the side to get his lap top. "I'm about to start editing, but since everyone's gonna see this anyway, you can help if you want."

Mike moved to sit next to Chris. "Sure. I'll help." Chris fired up the interview, the two men settling in for a long night of editing.

**XX-**-XX**

Shawn stayed in the warm, comforting arms of Bret just a little while longer until he felt he needed to pull away. He stared down at their entangled hands, the sight reminding him of a time ages ago when their hands were constantly entangled-usually in bed. He sighed, dropping their hands as thoughts of their future swirled around in his head. He loved Bret with all his heart. That's something that would never change, this interview being a perfect example of that. Bret could kiss him anytime or anywhere and no doubt it would have the same effect every time. However, that didn't mean it was right. He thought long and hard about everything from the last couple of days, all of it swirling around in his mind and some of it tugging the strings around his heart.

He really hated that everything from this moment on depended on his next few words, but he wanted it this way. He wanted the chance to just finally do what HBK wanted to do, but with matters of the heart, often times the head want conflicted with the heart want. Oddly enough though, this was one of the rare times that his heart was agreeing with his head. It seemed like everything had come full circle and now all he had to do was get it off his chest.

He let go of Bret's hand, looking up with a confidence he didn't have years ago when they first hooked up. "This interview Bret was probably the best thing and the worst thing to ever happen to me in a long time," he said softly. "The best thing about it was being able to see you again and apologize for lying to you twelve years ago. I shouldn't have lied, but…it's not like you didn't know the truth all alone."

Bret grabbed his hands again, squeezing them. "Don't let go Shawn. I'm trying to enjoy these last few moments with you and yeah. You're right," he nodded. "I wasn't 100% sure but I had a feeling in my gut that you knew about it. It's okay now though. It's behind us and I hope we never have to worry about it again. I don't wanna talk about Montreal anymore Shawn. I just…want us to be okay."

Shawn's eyes lingered on their hands, but he didn't let go deciding that he too liked holding Bret's hand. He took a few moments thinking over his next few words, almost unaware that Bret was sitting down pulling him into his lap. Shawn blinked, his heart racing a bit as Bret's arms slid around his waist caressing his sides. "It's okay. I'm not gonna try anything. Like I said, I just wanted a few moments alone with you is all. Take your time. I'm really in no hurry anymore."

Which was the truth. Bret was in no hurry to leave the room anymore. When Chris left symbolizing the end of a long, tense interview, it seemed like all the air came back into the room. He could breath once again and what's better was that he could breath again with Shawn. He watched the face of the confused man in his lap as he, no doubt, attempted to search his heart for answers to questions that would effect them both forever. He knew Shawn had an answer when his head dropped and one of his hands enclosed the cross around his neck. "Go ahead Shawn. What's on your mind?"

Shawn really liked the idea of making decisions on his own. Thing is, this was one time he wished he didn't have to. He really hated matters of the heart, but at least this time, he knew in his head and in his heart that this was what he truly wanted. Shawn dropped his hand, meeting the set of dark eyes that would win him over every time once upon a time. "So much has changed Bret. You and I are not who we used to be twelve years ago. I would like to think we've both changed for the better."

Bret laughed a little. "Maybe you did, but up until a few days ago, I was still pretending to hate your guts. That's not what I'd call change Shawn."

"You don't hate me now right?" he asked.

Bret cupped the side of his face, but just as quickly dropped his hand back down to his side. "No. I could never really hate you Shawn. Even when I said that to you years ago, I didn't mean it. I loved you so much it hurt. I was really just trying to make you feel what I felt, but now I know you weren't feeling that much better. We were both fools Shawn."

"Yeah, we were, but now we've both grown up a little. You…" he smiled. "You got married. You have a wife and kids. You look…great Bret. You've been taking care of yourself and you really have no idea how much it means to know that you're okay. You had me worried for a while. All that anger oozing from you…" He fidgeted with his necklace. "I prayed a lot of nights for forgiveness, if only so you would stop frowning so much and smile. Your smile was dead to me for so many years Bret. I didn't think I'd ever see it again."

Bret pressed their foreheads together, smiling big. "How's that? Is that big and bright enough for you?"

Shawn laughed. "Yeah, I guess that works." He looked down, his stomach slowly coiling into a tight knot. The longer he sat here, the harder this would be on them both. "Bret…I don't think I can let you bust up your happy home," he said quietly, deciding to just come out with it rather than beat around the bush.

"You know, I had a feeling you would say that."

Shawn raised his head, Bret's saddened expression tearing him apart. "Bret, before you came to Stamford, you and I both know you had every intention of going back home to your wife. If we would have acted like…well…like what we both expected one another to act like then you and I would have done the entire interview behind a wall, never locking eyes with one another because you hate me."

Bret shook his head. "No, no God Shawn I don't hate you," he replied, almost pleadingly. "You've always been one of those people who believed that everything happened for a reason. I don't think we'd have lasted much longer with the divider. We're both too damn stubborn and truth is, I think a part of me wanted to see you Shawn. I think…the reason I agreed to do this interview in the first place was the excuse to see you one more time."

"Maybe Bret, but that doesn't change the fact that you're married. If you were able to walk down the isle and say 'I do' it's because you love her. Maybe you don't love her the way that you love me, but there's something about her that makes you feel complete."

Bret thought about this for a second, his eyes lingering on the gold band around his finger. "I…I love her to a degree Shawn," he admitted. "I love Jackie and I love how she's completely devoted to me. She goes out of her way to make me happy and she kinda brought me out of a dark place. I was…slipping in and out of depression, but she got me out of the house and traveled with me. Showed me that life was still worth living so yeah. I do love her, but it's not the same Shawn." He paused. "Nothing will ever compare to what we had…have."

"Bret, this is hard for me ya know." He wiped his eyes. "You and I were so good for one another at one time, but I just think that right now, we should just…leave the past and what we had behind and continue moving forward, without each other. We're not young anymore so we can't do like we used to. You managed to find a life without Shawn Michaels and after many failed attempts, I found one without a Hart. We both managed to find some kind of inner peace so I don't see any reason why we should take steps backwards when we were both moving forward."

"Shawn, I don't see how the two of us being together is a step backwards," he scowled, not liking this at all. "Montreal is what's been keeping our relationship estranged for so many years, but now that we've cleared up that gigantic misunderstanding I don't see why we can't try again." He moved a piece of hair out of Shawn's face. "You still love me and I still love you so why won't you give us a chance? Why does it have to be like this? I'm sorry if I seem pushy. I know I told you to make your own decision, but you'll have to give me something better than what you're giving me. We made love Shawn. Maybe the circumstances are questionable, but you never would have let me have you if a tiny part of you didn't want it. Tell me I'm wrong."

"I…I can't," he admitted. "I'm sure I did wonder and thinking back on it, it…it was…" He was blushing at the memory of being trapped beneath Bret, clinging to him experiencing what seemed like a distant memory before today.

Bret pulled him closer, nuzzling his neck with a sigh. "It was good Shawn and it'll always be good if you want it."

"Bret don't do this," he pleaded softly. "Don't make this harder on us than it has to be. I can't…we can't do this again. How many times have we broken up, got back together only to break up again?"

"Several times, but that was then Shawn. I don't think it'll be that way now."

Shawn was eerily silent for a long time which forced Bret to pull away. He watched Shawn for the longest time who looked ready to burst into tears again. Bret sighed. He didn't want to admit it, but it looked like Shawn's mind was made up. He no longer cared for him the way that Bret wanted and while the hard truth hurt so much, he really couldn't be mad at him. Coming into this interview, no one could have predicted what would happen. Bret sure as hell didn't expect to have this overwhelming urge to leave his wife to be with the man he claimed to hate for twelve years. As he sat here thinking on it, he had to admit that trying to explain this one to his wife would be quite the doozy. On impulse, Bret leaned forward coaxing Shawn into a kiss, his own eyes tearing up knowing that this would be the last freebie.

Shawn dropped his head after the kiss, tears dropping into his lap. "I'm in love with John," he said quietly. "I wish I had the strength to explain why, but I don't. Just know that until John wormed his way into my life, it was still all about you. John gave me the strength to let go so I did. Just not completely and I think he knew that. He encouraged me to find closure with you and I want to Bret. I want to leave here knowing that you're gonna continue living your life while I attempt to build a new one…with or without John." Shawn threw his arms around him. "I love you so much Bret, but…I like things the way they are. I don't really want to throw my life away and start a new one. My life isn't perfect, but it's the closest it's ever been and I don't really feel like starting over. We're both older. You already have kids and I don't, but I want some. I'm…no one knows this except Mark and John but I'm actually planning on retiring this March. Even my body is ready to quit."

Shawn pulled back twirling a strand of Bret's hair. "I'm an old man now and all I want to do is do old man things. I wanna lay in bed all day unless it's hunting season. I don't wanna have to worry about booking a flight to the next show. I'm tired of taking bumps on the mat and I'm tired of all the damn drama. The last few months with John have been what I've spent my whole life searching for since Montreal…and I don't want to give it up." Shawn slid out of Bret's lap, extending his hand. Bret reluctantly took it, allowing Shawn to pull him up. They both stared at the door, neither one making much of an effort to get to it just yet.

"So I guess…this is goodbye right?" Bret asked, his voice wavering a bit.

Shawn smiled a little before slowly releasing Bret's hand. "I…guess so. Unless you plan on coming to a few shows, I'm done after this mania. I'm not doing any interviews. No movies. No nothing. I'm going home to my ranch to do old people things and live life outside of the crazy wrestling world. I think I've earned that."

Bret chuckled, wiping his eyes. "Yeah, I think so too Princess-Shawn." He looked over at the door again, Shawn's eyes doing the same. "At least we're friends again Heartbreaker. I hope that at least, never changes."

Shawn held his hand as they walked towards the door. "Only if you don't want it to." The door swung open and out they went, shutting the door literally and emotionally behind them; that part of there lives never to be spoken of again outside that door…at least in such depth. They hugged one last time, big smiles on their faces as well as warm tears.

"Vince gave me a call so I'm gonna get back with him before I fly back to Canada."

"And I'm…I'm just going home," Shawn sighed. "Take care Bret. I hope you stay in touch."

"You too Shawny. Take care and…good luck. I hope you and John have many happy years together. You've earned it and he's a lucky guy."

Both men got on the elevator and when they reached the last floor, they exited, releasing the other's warm hand going their separate ways. For Bret, it was bittersweet and somewhat disappointing, but deep down he felt Shawn was right. They weren't young men anymore and up until Chris called him on the phone about the interview, Shawn was the last person on his mind. How easy one's mind can change after a few short hours. Days ago, he'd have left the interview knowing that he would get over Shawn again. However, what Shawn didn't know was that this time, it wasn't going to be as easy especially since he was taking with him the memory of the one night they shared, one he was sure to replay over in his head for a while. In time, he'd heal again. He always did. He just wished he didn't have to.

Once Bret got to his car, he pulled out his cell doing something he thought he'd never do again in a million years.

"Hello. Vince McMahon speaking."

"Vince this is Bret. When can we meet?"

**XX-**-XX**

Shawn wasted no time calling in a flight back to Texas. He had roughly an hour to get back to the hotel and pack so he could get the hell out of Connecticut. He just barely made it in time to catch the afternoon flight. He was so tired, but commercial flights sucked so going to sleep was out of the question. Instead he had plenty of time to ponder his decision, each and every time concluding that this was the way to go. If he'd have gone back to Calgary with Bret, a whole mess awaited them both. First they would have to explain to his family that he was bi-sexual, which would have gone about as well Montreal all over again. Once that hurdle was over and done with, the media attention would have been ridiculous. It would mean explaining Montreal all over again and all of that was unnecessary drama he did not want. Not only that, but he really did love John just as much and he knew that love was still strong if all he could think about during the sessions was getting back home to John. His conscience felt clear, his soul felt free and for the first time since 1995, he felt on top of the world.

All of the thinking and musing got him through the long flight. He was beat, but he wasn't dropping dead to the world until he was home. He drove the rental car down the bumpy dirt road, making a mental note to have it paved soon. He left all of his luggage inside of it, taking only what he deemed was necessary for tonight. He glanced down at his watch. It was nearing midnight which meant he'd been wide awake for almost 40 hours give or take. He fidgeted with his keys trying to find the right one, but gave up after a few seconds lazily opting to use the key hidden under the rug. He quietly pushed open the front door, his heart almost leaping out of his chest. There was John asleep upright on the couch. His laptop was sitting open on the coffee table and there were papers sprawled everywhere. It was so normal and so familiar that it made him sprout tears of joy.

He quietly latched the door back then took a moment to peel off pieces of clothing. He didn't really feel like putting on more clothes, but he had a sudden desire to wear something that screamed John. He drug himself down the hall into the bed room, grabbing a pair silk boxers with letters H-B-K on them that John gave him a few weeks ago. Lastly he grabbed a fleece blanket, dragging it behind him back into the living room. One of John's arms hang limply over the arm of the couch while the other rested on stacks of important stock reports. Knowing John would no doubt reach for the papers first, Shawn opened the tiny box which damn near burned a hole in his hand and with some work, slipped the ring on John's finger. The thought of John waking up to a diamond ring and stocks amused him so he almost laughed out loud. Just as quickly, the jet lag mixed with hours of no sleep hit him all at once and he found himself crawling into John's lap straddling him, his head finding the familiar spot in the crook of his neck where he found the most comfort every time. He pulled the fleece over the two of them and just seconds later, he was sound asleep.

**XX-**-XX**

Chris and Miz finished editing the interview late that evening. Chris was fairly happy with his work, but now came the fun part. He stuck the drive back into his computer. _Do you wish to save file? _Chris smirked, hitting the delete button. Miz blinked. "C-Chris! Do you know what you just did? That's not gonna go to the recycle bin. It's-it's gone for good!"

Chris put away his lap top yawning. "Yeah, I know, but the world isn't ready for something that epic. Those two hard copies are gonna be sent to Shawn and Bret. Unless they choose to share, no one but us will ever know what really happened between them and I'm okay with that." He fell back against the sheets, curling into Mike who was ready to fall out too.

"I…understand. I don't think they'll argue with you either." He put his arm around Chris, the two of them out snoring loudly moments later. The edited discs were placed in jewel cases with custom art by Mizzicho. _Heart to Hart_. To anyone looking at his desk, they would seem like ordinary CDs, but they were far from ordinary. It was the interview of a lifetime, one the world would never see.


	33. Epilogue

**Epilogue (Or something like one)**

**Wrestlemania 26**

Shawn waved to the crowd one final time then slipped behind the curtain where he was greeted with whistles and a huge ovation from his fellow co-workers. Shawn beamed, running a hand through his untidy hair. "You guys give me way too much credit. What about Mark? He did most of the work with those ancient knees and bones of his," Shawn teased.

"Hey!" Mark pushed his way through the crowd grinning at Shawn. "Your bones are pretty ancient too pretty boy. Don't forget. You and I are the oldest Raw superstars in this room or did that slip your mind due to old age?"

Shawn pouted. "Mark!" He grinned. "I'm still prettier than you."

Mark laughed, shuffling through the bunch for a hug from his oldest friend. "God I'm gonna miss having you around Saint. You're always a breath of fresh air. Now I'm stuck with old big nose and you know how terribly boring he can be," Mark snickered.

"Hey! I'm not _that_ boring," Hunter grinned. He pulled away from Jeff just long enough to give Shawn a quick kiss on the cheek. "My good bye will be tomorrow. Hope you're prepared to see me cry like a little punk."

"Aww…but Hunty you're my punk…and Jeff's," he added winking at the grinning red head.

"Now hold on a second fellas. Can the champ get one in?" Cena shoved Hunter out of the way grinning down at his former tag partner. "I don't think I can say nothing that hasn't already been said Shawny. I hate to see you go, but you gotta do what ya gotta do." He stuck out his hand for Shawn to shake but all the guys suddenly snorted or laughed.

"Okay. What's the inside joke fellas?" Shawn asked.

Adam popped his gum. "Oh everyone knows Cena's still smitten. Give the man a hug Wonder Boy so Randy and I don't have to watch you sulk about it for the next year."

"Sorry Shawn, but we're never gonna let this go," Dave snickered.

John's face colored at this, but Shawn spared him, pulling him into a hug. "Take care champ. You know you'll always be my favorite tag partner," he winked.

John pulled away with a smile. "Of course I will be. No one else carried your luggage and gave you free backrubs," he teased.

"Free backrubs? Is that _all _you gave him freely?" Rey teased.

John shot Rey a look. "You know, for a midget Mexican, you sure as hell talk a lot of trash."

"Oh come on John. You know Rey's always been a little monster," Shawn grinned.

"No more than you I would think," Chris said with a smirk.

Shawn frowned. "You know I'm still pissed you Chrissy Poo."

Chris poked out his lips in a pout. "Shawn, I've sent you no less than 100 tweets begging for forgiveness. I'm sure my followers are starting to wonder about us."

"Aww…poor Chrissy cry about his damn luck!" he grinned. "I forgive you…ish. Just know that I won't be doing anymore interviews with you…ever now…" He looked around the crowd eagerly. "Where's my baby?"

"Which one?" Dave asked. "The saintly one has many these days…or so I hear," he snickered.

"Very funny Dave, but I'm referring to the one that spits up milk on occasion and likes shiny things that are usually attached to my chest."

Someone jingled what sounded like a set of keys loudly then suddenly there was a small cough and a fit of giggles from one happy baby. Shawn's eyes lit up as the figure made his way through the crowd, holding his baby waving keys in front of her as she laughed hysterically. "You know Shawn. I don't know how you and John did it, but this baby is scary amusing." Bret smiled at Shawn, John standing behind him in the distance. "Fussy baby was fussy and after John told me about your special shiny things, I figured the keys would amuse her. I didn't figure she'd find them _that_ amusing though." Bret cradled the baby in his arms, tickling her cheek. She giggled, sticking her hand to her mouth sucking on it. "She's beautiful. Looks just like mommy…which is also kinda scary," he teased before handing her over to Shawn, being sure to fix the tiny blanket back to cover most of her head.

Shawn rocked Arty, short for Artemis, never really noticing how everyone was crowded around him as if fascinated that he had an infant. "I don't really know why she kinda looks like me either, but I did have this freaky dream the night before we adopted her. I would tell you, but you wouldn't believe me if I did." Shawn handed the baby back over to Bret.

"Ooo I wanted to hold her," Chris sulked.

Shawn spun around bumping into half of the roster who were all craning their necks for a view of the happy baby. "Geez guys. You act like you've never seen an infant. You all can fight with Bret and John over her. I need to get a shower so I can get back home."

Shawn left the guys behind to grab a quick shower. By the time he was done, most of the guys were gone already. As he headed down the hall looking for John, he ran into Bret first who was now infant less. "Bret…where's Arty?"

"Oh don't worry," he smiled. "She's still surrounded by old people. Mainly a certain Vince McMahon who's wrapped up like a mummy."

Shawn giggled. "Well you sure hit him enough times to warrant the look," he pointed out.

"Yeah, I did, but some of those were on your behalf too ya know…Ms. Shiny Nipples." Bret reached out and with a smirk he tugged at one of Shawn's nipples.

"Hey!" Shawn smacked his hand away playfully then grabbed him for a big hug. "I hoped you would throw in a few licks for me and don't tug on my nipples. The baby does that enough." He pulled away beaming at his ex. "I see you dyed the gray. Tsk. Tsk," he teased, wagging his finger. "Gray or not, you're still gonna be wise old uncle Bret to Artemis…and possibly others if I keep having baby dreams."

Bret blinked. "Old? Oh come on," he pouted. "I'm not that old…am I? You're older than me ya know."

Shawn pecked his cheek. "Yeah, but only by a few years. Plus, I bet your bones creak just as loud as Mark's so that makes you old."

"Yeah, yeah," he laughed. "I'm actually having drinks with the crypt keeper in a few, but I wanted to get in one last hug before you left. I'm not scheduled to be on the show tomorrow night, but…I don't think I want to see you retire all over again. I might turn into a punk too. The wrestling world is losing a valuable commodity, but I'm sure Artemis and John aren't complaining all that much." Bret looked down at Shawn's finger noting how it was still void of a gold or silver band. "So when's the big date?"

"We haven't decided yet. There's one teeny little detail we need to work out first, but I suspect it'll be before the summer's out."

"I want an invite. Roddy too, who told me to apologize for not being here tonight, but he's filming a movie-at his age now-with some of Bruckheimer's folk so it should be a good one despite the tragic casting." He kissed Shawn's cheek. "Take care HBK. I enjoyed your final run. I'm glad we got a chance to do it together."

"Me too Bret. See you soon." They both waved goodbye before Shawn hurried off to find John and his baby. He poked his head in the break room grinning big when he spotted John, Vince, Pat and a few others lingering around. He ran into the room throwing his arms around John who was watching the old folks from afar.

"Kitten," John chuckled, kissing his temple. "I didn't get a chance to congratulate you. Great match as always," he dawled.

"Mmm…well I wanted to leave a lasting impression, but now that its over, I'm ready to focus on what matters the most-family." He drew John in for a kiss. "Oh and making you my wifey."

"You know Shawn, since you have the longer hair, wouldn't that make _you_ the wifey?" John asked, tugging a strand of it for good measure.

Shawn shook his head. "You know why you're the wifey and until you do something about it, you'll always be wifey," he grinned. Shawn heard Arty's distinct laugh again, the cuteness of it making him and John both crack up. "I wish she'd stay this content at home," Shawn said making a face. "She's hardly content unless she's…well you know."

"Can you blame her though?" John teased, reaching down to rub one of the nipples.

Shawn smacked his hand away. "John!"

"Or," John laughed, "It could be all the potential grandfather and godfather material she's surrounded by," he said nodding towards the corner. Shawn pulled away and with a mischievous smirk, snuck over behind Vince, poking him in his side.

"OUCH! Dammit that isn't funny!" he howled, making a duck face.

Shawn giggled. "Aww Vinny don't take it to heart. I was only teasing." Shawn casually glanced around the group of men frowning when he still didn't actually see his baby. "I thought you had Artemis?"

Vince nodded towards Pat and Arn, both men stepping aside. There sitting in a chair cradling baby Artemis was Ric Flair who was in his own little world it seemed. Ric held up his Rolex waving it in front of the baby as she made grabby hands for it, every now and then giggling. Shawn shot both Pat and Vince dirty looks, but they both feigned dumb expressions as if they had no idea why he wasn't thrilled about this. Clearly annoyed Shawn made ready to snatch up Arty, but then she suddenly yawned turning into Ric making soft sounds as she nuzzled his chest. Ric fixed the blanket rocking her a bit more before he finally looked up locking eyes with Shawn. Both Vince and Pat braced themselves for the inevitable explosion sure to come, but it never happened. Instead, they watched as a nervous Flair stood carefully handing over the little one to mommy. "She's beautiful Shawn and I'm sure you're going to be a great mom…or dad in the long run."

"Yeah well at any rate, at least she won't have to worry about me choosing my career over her. I just retired and unlike some people, I have no intention of ever coming back to wrestle," he said coldly.

Shawn turned to leave happy that his baby was back in his arms. "Shawn, wait," Ric called out, but he was ignored. Shawn kept walking and talking to the sleepy baby pretending that Ric didn't exist. Ric was dead to him years ago and in his mind, Ric would always be dead to him.

"Please!" Ric said a little louder, his voice wavering. "Please Shawn…Please don't keep me from seeing my granddaughter. You don't ever have to see me but at least let me see her. Please?" he pleaded.

Shawn paused for a moment staring down at the infant. She curled into him, her bright blue eyes finally closing. He walked a little more wishing he could ignore Ric's voice like he's done so many times before, but something about it this time actually made him stop and take notice. John joined his fiance, putting an arm around him lovingly. Shawn looked to him for help, but through his eyes, John let him know that this was something else he had to decide on his own. After a long fight within himself, Shawn spun around piercing Ric with cold, dark eyes that made him cringe. "Fine. You can see her once a week. I'll make sure I'm elsewhere whenever the great Ric Flair decides to grace us with his presence."

Ric smiled humbly, knowing deep down that this was more than he could ever ask for. "Alright son," he nodded, speaking quietly. "I'll take what I can get."

"Don't…call me that," Shawn snapped. "I'm not your son."

John put his arm around Shawn leading them out of the room while Ric looked on, watching the three of them leave with a sad smile on his face. At least he got to hold the baby he thought, but deep down, he really wish he could have made peace with Shawn. Still, he had no intention of ever giving up. He still had hope in his heart that someday they would all be a real family, but until then, he would just have to keep praying that before his time is up, he would be able to get through to the son he left behind so many years ago and be head of the family he longed to have…

**The End**

**

* * *

AN: As of Friday January 15, 2011 at 7:15 am I have completed this crazy headache of a fic and have absolutely no regrets about anything that happened. I do sometimes wish I'd have left well enough alone, but if you're going to do BHBK, you gotta do it right. So now I better get to explaining a few things. Unless you're one of my roleplaying partners, you might not understand a few things.**

_-In a majority of our RP universes for wrestling, HBK is the son of Ric Flair. My friends and I concluded this sometime after Mania 24. The two look an awful lot alike and seriously. If you do a bit of research, it IS realistically possible that this is the case. In other RP verses, Jeff Jarrett is Ric's son. Either one works. If you want to know where some friends of mine were going with this, look up a fanfic titled "Sins of the Father"._

_-The name Artemis…you really don't want to know. But as an inside joke, tis funny as hell._

_-The big one: How come BHBK didn't hook up? Because my Shawn muse…or the one who used to run my head, is old and content with his life post "The Deal". He had absolutely no desire to be Mr. or Mrs. Bret Hart because he's pretty much convinced that it's not meant to be. Plus, he was really happy with John and if you understand why his relationship with JBL works, you'll understand why he wasn't so quick to throw it all away. He also gave you an array of other reasons why it wasn't gonna be BHBK and realistically speaking, it just ain't happening. (But this is fan fiction so if you want BHBK to happen, have at it.)_

_-Is this my original ending? Nope. Ending kept changing due to the way my musi told the story. I originally planned to have Shawn end up alone with John showing up at the end to congratulate him on a happy retirement. He'd see both Bret and John, but would leave for coffee with John hinting at a possible reuniting while Bret showed little Jackie off to uncle Vince. I think in another ending, I had the BHBK reunion in mind but since Bret's married in this one, it would have taken this to dnw territory and lazy writer is lazy. Besides, I have other BHBK stories with happy-ish endings and if you haven't read them, I'll list them at the end of this ridiculously long author's note._

_-Jackie isn't so little in real life but I don't like to make things exactly as they are in real life due to my mass paranoia of being sued and speaking of that, I am sorely tempted to delete both my fan fiction profiles. I have seen way too many people linking fanfics to superstars on twitter and that ain't cool. I will happily delete both profiles (or at least my stories since this particular account is a joint one) and avoid being sued by the corporate machine. So do all us slash writers a favor and stop it. Some things are better left unknown to them._

_-I am so tired. Like, it's 7:45am and Im still typing this ridiculously long note._

_-For the record, my OTP still stands as Shawn-Cena. Just thought I'd throw that out there for those of you who might be inclined to write it for me._

_-Here's the list of BHBK fics written by me: "Brotherly Love", "Hate Me in the Morning", "Just When I Thought", and "Birthday Cards". Two of those fics are not found if you search BHBK on because they are part of another fic titled "Piece of Me: The HBKronicles". Look up that fic and you'll find BHBKness. As of right now, I am done with them unless I do the song fics nagging at me._

_-Lastly, if you didn't like the ending, my BMI musi would like you all to know that they're sorreh about yer damn luck!_

_-Thanks to all of you insane people who read all 200,000 plus pages of this mess. It was quite the journey but I'm happy that my internet was chopped off long enough to make Shawn muse agree to finish up his part. If it wasn't for my internet being turned off, I'd still be hollering about my damn luck. Minaji, Esha, Thor, DK, Moussy, Jeri, LC, Reena, Sera, and my husband-wifey Lava aka slashburd here on , thank you all for being inspirations. Minaji thank you for kicking my ass when I got lazy. Jeri, it's thanks to the new lappy top that I was able to even finish without tossing mine out of a window. LC, your kind words are always flattering. I hate to let people down so hope you enjoyed it. Your 'do your best' messages are more encouraging than you think. Also, your writing has improved a lot. I really hope you continue to push on despite the horrible things some people might say to you. Moussy and Thor, I'm always delighted by your fan arts. Thanks for making me feel special and drawing such epic pr0nz. Esha, I'm pretty damn sure you've reviewed every chapter of every fic I've ever written. Love ya! DK and Reena. You both get duck faces courtesy of the young one who refuses to get over the potential dark fanfic we have between the three of us in our archives. Marcus thinks we should do eet though. -_- Lyssa, my CJ muse is waving at you. I don't think he realizes what the hell is going on right now. Sera, I still deny turning you into a slash lover. BTW, I hope I did the old man justice. Lava, can we cuddle now? XD_

_- To the rest of you, I plan to send you all personal messages thanking you for reviewing when I can so please dont hate me. I've been without net for months._

_-I'm bad with endings so I figure tis best to leave it open however…_

_-That is ALL folk. No more. Seriously. I'm now officially retired with Shawn muse. (In other words, I wont be starting any new chaptered fics.)_

_-Now review…or not. I seriously should have spent less time working on this since really. I'm not getting paid. LOL I have been wracking my brain for original stuff but this…THIS fic was always in the way. Ha! Its finished. Now seriously…what didja think?_


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